Once, there was a 8luh 8luh huge 8itch named Alanerianitonialissonnnn. Alanerianitonialissonnnn (Connor for short) was, as I said, a HUGE BITCH who fucked majestic stallions with his STRONG boner. Conoor had da hors drem last nitean& he won tha hart (3) ov da hors b/c he luuuuuv da horsee. And then he got it pregnant with his STRONG boner but da hors was a guy. THUS BEGINS horse_ebooks because horse mpreg...
But then everything changed when the BONER nation attacked.
And then there was semen everywhere. THE END.
But it isn't really the end. It is only the beginning. SO SAYS THE BONER LORD ANDREW HUSSIE!
But I do not draw Homestuck.
I CONJURE THIS INTREPID FANTASYSCAPE WITH TEARS BLED FROM THE WISDOM-WEARY EYES OF FIFTY THOUSAND IMAGINARY MAGICIANS. I PULL HEAVY DRAGS FROM THE BRUMES OF INSPIRATION WITH ENCHANTED BELLOWS MARAUDED FROM A GUILD OF CHURLISH MYTHICAL DWARVES. VAST BULBOUS RIDDLESPIDERS PUSH THE SILKEN STRANDS OF PURE WHIMSY THROUGH HIDEOUS ABDOMINAL SPINNERETS AND IT IS THAT WITH WHICH I WEAVE THIS AUDACIOUS COCOON OF EXQUISITE LIES. AND WHEN IT HATCHES A GREAT MOTH OF TITILLATION WILL AWAKEN AND ROAR AND BEAT ITS WINGS, AND THE POWDER SETTLING DOWN WILL ARREST THE HUMORS OF AN ENORMOUS TERRIBLE OLD BEGGAR, RELAXING THE VULTUROUS LEATHERY VICEGRIP HE'S FIXED AROUND YOUR CAPTIVE MIND.