Title: GIR, I Know What We're Gonna Do Today! (GIKWWGDT)
Chapter 1: Slip-Up
Characters: Dib, Zim, Gaz, GIR
Word count: 849
Disclaimer: I only own the idea for this story. All characters belong to their rightful owners.

Author's Note: This chapter was rewritten from the original. Thank you to everyone who is reading this! I love all of you, whether you're a reader that's stuck with this since the beginning or a new reader just passing through! (But I'd love you more if you spared a review and told me what you think.) Enjoy!

Dib Membrane tried not to make a sound as he spied on his nemesis, the alien Invader Zim. "In his own lab, too! Wow, hehe," Dib mused quietly to himself. Bypassing his enemy's "security" wasn't much of a challenge; it almost never was with Zim's defective robot, GIR, guarding the base. Still, the boy prided himself in "tricking" the malfunctioning SIR unit into letting him in. Zim had yet to notice. Beside him was his sister, Gaz, who only had eyes for her Game Slave.

"Gaz, turn it down; I can't hear Zim's evil plan! And what if he hears that beeping?" Gaz responded by punching him in the gut and continued slaying vampire pigs.

Blinking away tears of pain, Dib refocused on Zim, who was now standing next to a metal hoop-shaped machine twice as tall as him. The platform it stood on read "Universal Transporter".

"GIR, get me the test subject!"

"Yes, master!" the little robot squealed. He ran out of the room and returned a few seconds later dragging a rubber chicken. Zim aimed a remote at the Universal Transporter and pressed a big red button. The machine sprung to life, clanking and whirring, then glowing with energy. Zim took the chicken and tossed it through the hoop; it swallowed it with a flash of bright purple light. The chicken and machine were nowhere to be seen.

"Gaz!" Dib gasped. "Did you see that? The chicken – it just vanished! Into thin air!"

"Dib, can't you see I'm trying to play my Game Slave? Shut up or I'll strangle you!" Gaz threatened through her teeth.

"It was amazing!" he spluttered. "But knowing Zim, he's sure to use it for something horrible, like enslaving the human race or something. I have to destroy it before he gets any ideas. Okay, Gaz, here's the plan-"

"I am not helping you. Can't you see I'm trying to destroy vampire piggies?" Gaz only looked up from her game long enough to shoot him one of her trademark death glares that hinted at his impending doom.

"But-" Dib reached out to touch her arm; Gaz seeing it as a threat, pounced, her hands curling into claws aimed at her brother's giant head. Caught off guard, Dib barely had time to duck; within seconds, Gaz had him pinned him down. He shut his eyes, then felt her loosen her grip and retreat to her corner. She returned to playing her game, leaving Dib to scratch his head in confusion. It was unlike Gaz to pass up an opportunity to destroy Dib, but before he could ponder his sister's strange behavior, he felt claws digging into the back of his neck.

He tried to spin around, and a zipper-like grin gleamed at him from a green face. "What's this?" Zim shook the struggling Dib like a misbehaving puppy. "It looks like the Dib-human has been spying on Zim. Hmm... GIR, what should we do with him?" The alien turned to the robot.

"Uh...throw 'im in the circle thingy and make 'im disappear!" GIR cried. He laughed maniacally and ran into the wall.

"Hmm, what do you think, Dib?" The boy began to open his mouth, but Zim cut him off, "Oh, wait. I don't care!" He cackled dramatically for a minute and then dragged Dib to the machine that somehow reappeared.

"Gaz, help me!" Dib squealed in the direction of her hiding place. There was no answer; only the triumphant sound effects that signaled the completion of a level.

"So... the Dib thing is trying to cry for help from the Dib-sister. How pathetic. I can hear, Dib thing!"

Dib tilted his head thoughtfully. "Dib thing? That's a new one."

"Yeah, I thought I'd try to mix things up a little," Zim casually replied. "Now shut up and face your DOOM!" He gestured as best as he could with his free hand. "Behold! The Universal Transporter! Or UTP, for short," he added.

There was a moment of silence while it sunk in, then, "..UTP? But... 'transporter' is one word. Why the TP?"

"Eh, it sounds cool."

Dib opened his mouth to speak, but was cut off by Zim, "Shut your mouth, human worm baby."

He then commanded, "GIR, bring me the remote so I can dispose of this Dib filth! And the Dib-sister, too! The more humans, the better!"

Gaz strolled to the exit, her eyes never leaving her game. "Go, Gaz! Get help! Save yourself! Call the Swollen Eyeballs!" Dib screamed and kicked, but Zim's grip only tightened.

"GIR, stop her! And where's the remote?" Everything after that happened almost simultaneously. GIR rushed at Gaz (who was taking her time to leave), but slipped on what Dib now realized was the remote. At the same time, his struggles payed off as his foot collided with something hard and Zim groaned. A flash of bright purple light blinded them and the room glowed with energy, and that was the last thing the four of them remembered before they blacked out.