The Joke Is On Them
An April Fool's Day Humor Fic
By: LG
It was dark out when Cye got up, but he had not paid this any mind. He had awoken a half-hour early in order to start cooking for the day that lay ahead.
He figured by getting up this early and cooking the food ahead of time would save him from any potential pranks. As well as permit him to get in a few himself.
The Ronin of Torrent had just pulled out the muffins he had baked, when Rowen walked into the kitchen stifling a yawn rubbing at his eyes and walking over to where the tea was and poured himself a cup.
"Morning," Cye said in a cheerful tone.
Rowen made some indescribable noise that probably counted as a greeting, he took a sip of the tea, swallowed, took another sip and then spit it out, "Bah! Lemon juice!?"
The Warrior of Trust chortled, and gave a smirk, "April Fool's Ro!"
"I hate you," the archer grumbled as he exited the kitchen, and flopped down in a dining room chair.
"Lemon juice again Cye?" the Warrior of Strength queried in amusement as he now walked in, grabbing the utensils to begin setting the table. When Torrent's bearer nodded, Kento chuckled, "Get's him every time."
Ryo walked into the area an annoyed look on his face, and flopped down next to Strata's bearer.
"Whassa matter?" the archer queried…Sure he didn't get his normal dose of caffeine, but the lemon juice had been more than enough to bolt him into full wakefulness.
The Ronin of Wildfire let out a grunt, "Somebody stitched my pants together.""Oh that's a good one!" Kento said with a chortle, wrinkling his nose. "Where's Sage?"
"In the shower, where else?" the Torrent Ronin commented, as he placed the hot food down on the table.
"Out of the shower, actually," Sage supplied as he came into the room, "Good morning." He frowned when they all looked at him with surprise, and seeming disappointment. He quirked an eyebrow, but did not bother to ask the question, he merely sat down.
Everyone ate in silence, until they were on their second bite of muffin, and they could no longer stand the pure horror.
"That is awful!" Ryo complained, taking a drink and then jumping up from the table, "Ah! Who replaced it with hot sauce?"
"Guilty!" Kento said with a chortle, and then said to Cye, "Dude, the food ruining was a bad prank."
"I don't get it," the Water Ronin was clearly in shock, "I didn't do anything to it. I got up early so that no one would…Hold on." He got up from his seat and marched over to the kitchen, and checked the container of sugar more closely.
"It-It's salt!" Cye sputtered out, his eyes turning to the others, "Which one of you did this?" For some reason, his eyes landed on Rowen.
"Wasn't me! I like sugar, remember, what do I have to gain from doing such a ridiculous thing?" Rowen cried, raising his hands in surrender as a very annoyed Torrent Ronin came stalking over to him.
"You would do anything to get back at me for the other day," Cye rolled up his sleeves, a maniacal look in his eyes. "You're going to pay for this Rowen."
"But I didn't do it, I swear I didn't!" Rowen squeaked, and then dashed from the kitchen Cye hot on his heels.
"He's dead when Cye catches him," Ryo mused wincing when a very loud "Ahhh!" echoed throughout the house…Followed by two loud thuds.
"They just fell down the stairs, didn't they?" Kento asked with a forlorn sigh.
Sage gave a nod, "Pretty much."
The other three managed to separate Rowen and Cye with a little bit of effort and a lot of muscle. The Ronin of Strata continued to proclaim his innocence as they moved into the living room and sat down, trying to figure out what to do for the day.
"It's okay Ro, I believe you," Ryo told his friend, patting him on the shoulder.
Kento got a sly grin on his face as he kidded, "Hey maybe Ryo did it!"
There was now a murderous gleam in the Water Ronin's eyes, causing Kento to quickly comment, "I was kidding."
Sage gave a roll of his eyes, "I fail to see the point in this April Fool's day thing. Also, which one of you tried to put dye in my shampoo?"
Everyone in the room went dead quiet, thus effectively proving their guilt in the matter.
"Ah that's why there were looks of disappointment," the swordsman mused before calmly stating, "If you wish to prank me in such a way, you guys shouldn't do it at the same time and with the same shampoo bottle. It's rather noticeable when the half empty bottle is full, and brown is seeping from the poorly tightened lid."
"Well, I think I'll just head out to do my morning exercises," the Wildfire Ronin brightly commented, in need of an escape at this point. He walked out the door, and let out a loud, "EH?!"
"Dude, what's the matter?" Kento blinked as the Ronin of Wildfire had marched back inside, a scowl on his face.
"Who did this one?" Ryo demanded in aggravation, arms crossed in front of his chest.
Sage blinked in total confusion, "Did what?"
"This!" Ryo announced as he yanked back the curtain, revealing the fact it was still very early in the morning…It was practically pitch black out.
The other four Ronin just stared, before Kento cracked up.
"Oh! That's a good one, classic. Even getting Ro up before the sun, haha I love it! Who did it?"
He suddenly became aware of the fact the other Ronin were staring at him. Hardrock's bearer blinked, and pointed a finger to himself, "Wha? Me? No way you guys, I didn't do it. AH!" He booked it out of the room as Ryo AND Rowen went flying after him.
"Childish, very childish," Cye said shaking his head, as the three tore around the house.
Sage gave a snort at this, querying, "And how mature are you? Seeing as how you're the one who stitched all of Ryo's pants together?"
Torrent's bearer sheepishly grinned, "Guess you heard me out in the hall, then?"
"Add to the fact you're the only one of them that knows how to use a needle and thread…" Sage trailed off, the look on his face clearly signifying the fact he was not impressed with the day's occurrences so far. Then again, he normally looked like that anyway.
A very sore Kento entered the kitchen to do the morning dishes, real early morning dishes now. It had reached five o'clock in the morning, boy it was going to be an agonizingly long day.
Ryo and Rowen had ganged up on him, and he had not in the least bit appreciated it. He had not set the clocks like that! Kento would have loved to lay claim to that prank, but the fact was he didn't do it.
With a forlorn sigh he put the last of the breakfast dishes into the sink, and then reached over and turned on the faucet.
"ACKKKKKK!"
The other four came running into the kitchen, to watch in amusement as Kento got soaked to the bone and flailed to turn off the faucet as he got hit with water.
He finally succeeded; someone had put a rubber band over the sink sprayer's handle then turned the nozzle so it would hit whoever happened to be doing dishes.
The Ronin of Hardrock was currently dripping all over the kitchen floor, his hair hanging in his eyes.
He turned…Or sloshed…Around, and glared at his four friends with a thinly veiled disgust, "Who did it?"
Ryo chortled, and then collapsed in laughter…Cye and Rowen were quick to join the Ronin of Wildfire in hysterics. Sage merely shook his head in a belated amusement.
"Ryo, you are DEAD!" the Warrior of Strength announced, hands going out to strangle Wildfire's bearer.
"Eep!" Ryo leapt up, and booked it from the kitchen, "Kento, jeeze! I didn't do it, I haven't been in the kitchen!"
"Liar!" Kento bellowed, hot on Wildfire's heels.
"He who laughs first is guilty?" Sage asked raising a blond eyebrow.
Rowen frowned, "Haven't you ever pulled an April Fool's prank, before?"
"Yeah…Really, Sage, does your family ever do…Anything fun?" Cye blinked with a puzzled expression on his face.
The swordsman gave a derisive snort, "If you call such antics fun, then I will gladly do without."
Halo's bearer calmly walked out of the kitchen and back into the living room, he checked around to make sure no one was watching and then dropped the extra-rubber band into the waste basket…As well as an empty bag that read 'salt' on the one side. Sage then checked his wristwatch which reflected the correct time of 5:45, instead of 8:45 as he had set the other clocks to, and then headed outside for his morning meditation.
The remainder of the day was spent exchanging mild pranks with one another, though somehow the swordsman managed to avoid all of them. Ryo had tossed water balloons at everyone; Sage had merely sidestepped the balloon aimed at him, permitting it to hit the archer right in the face.
Either way, it had ended up making quite a mess in the house one that Cye was quick to demand the he clean up. Torrent's bearer had proceeded to try and pass off Jello as antibacterial soap…Though once Kento found out that the soap was indeed food, he was rather pleased.
Of course when he actually ate "soap" he was not too thrilled, but it had left the rest of them in stitches. Rowen's main claim to fame that day was gluing coin to the porch, and Cye, Kento, and Ryo trying in vain to pick it up.
Kento had helped cooked supper and tried to pass off "fake" potatoes; the bearer of Torrent had helped him make the crafts. It had taken them less than an hour to sew the things together. Ryo and Rowen had almost eaten them, until they asked Sage why he wasn't bothering with his.
The calm announcement from him that it was fake food shocked both of them and they proceeded to fall out of their chairs. The four young men then declared that April Fool's was now over, simply because they were too tired to deal with anything else.
Sage had already gotten in his pranks, and in fact he had one more in store for them, though they would not realize it until much later.
The Ronin of Halo was disturbed from his sleep the next morning by what could only be described as screams of horror and anger.
He didn't even have to get up to know what had occurred. Ryo would be suffering from bleach instead of his shampoo, a bit of pink dye having been mixed in.
Kento's hair would be an awful shade of red, while Rowen's would be a very bright purple.
The Torrent Ronin's hair would be neon green by now, with a bit of black mixed in…He most likely could have passed for Sekhmet's little brother, if all went well.
Sage Date, the Ronin Warrior of Halo, permitted himself a sleepy chuckle, "Nobody ever suspects the quiet one." He cracked one eye open to make sure his door was indeed locked, and then went back to sleep.
While he had taken great pains to make sure all evidence was disposed of in any room but his, he still hoped someone would suspect him of the schemes. And just in case they should…Well, the April Fool's sign he had plastered on his door would serve as statement enough.
A/N: This one-shot was done in response to a challenge posted by Emeraldteardrops on the SamuraiFanservice forum. I was bit by the creativity bug earlier this month, which led me to finishing Book 2, getting halfway through The Storm's Weathered, and starting TGOL Book 3. This story was a nice break from all of it, so thank-you Em for posting the challenge.
To everyone else, enjoy your April Fool's…And watch out for fake food! Or an extremely devious Sage XD
LG