Okay, so tell me if you've heard this once before. A slayer, a vampire, and a key walk into a bar… oh wait, you have heard this one? Well, maybe the one you've heard went a little different. The one I'm referring to is a story about a slayer named Faith, a vampire named Spike, and a key named Dawn. As for the bar, well, it was a little bar in Wisconsin simply referred to as 'the Roadhouse'.
The odd trio entered sometime after midnight, the exact time was lost after being told time and time again. Anyway, when they entered the bar, they were on full alert. Something was totally off about that place.
"Hey Faith," Dawn whispered to the dark-haired slayer.
"Yeah, D?"
"Something's definitely weird here. I'm not a slayer, but even my Spidey-sense is tingling," Dawn continued.
"Mine too," Faith replied, "Just let me do all the talking so we can get the hell out of here."
Spike stayed silent, instead choosing to glare at all the men staring at them. When they reached the bar, a blonde woman approached them, "Haven't seen you three around these parts before. What can I do for you?"
"Actually, ma'am," Faith responded, trying to be as polite as possible, "We had a little car trouble a couple of miles south of here and were wondering if you could call a mechanic for us?" She smiled what she thought was a nice, polite smile.
"Well, you really are in a pickle," continued the woman. "The nearest mechanic is about another twenty miles down the road, and they're closed now honey."
Faith frowned when she called her 'honey'. "Well then, can you point us to the nearest motel, seeing as it's going to be a long wait?"
The woman frowned as well, "Actually, the nearest hotel happens to be right near the nearest mechanic." She gave the three companions a once over. Well, more like a twice over. The one who was clearly the oldest, and the only male of the group, still hadn't spoken. Nor had he even looked at her. Instead he was eyeing the other patrons, as if he was on guard. The one whom she spoke with seemed to be in charge, and her eyes hadn't left the bartender since the moment she first spoke. Both the blonde and the brunette in charge were both pretty tough and probably ran into their fair share of troubles in the past. The youngest one of the bunch just looked bored, but unlike her companions seemed perfectly harmless, almost vulnerable.
It was the girl's vulnerability that touched the blonde woman's heart and caused her to utter her next sentence, "Well, it just so happens I actually have a couple of extra rooms upstairs. You can stay here 'til morning, and then you can call the tow truck."
Faith considered her options. It wasn't exactly safe to stay at some unknown bar in the middle of nowhere. Still, they didn't have much choice, unless someone could give them a ride to the nearest town…
As if reading her thoughts, the blonde woman continued, "Twenty miles is quite a long drive to ask of someone. Besides, I can't leave the bar to drive you, and most of these guys here are too drunk to be driving themselves, let alone anyone else. You really don't want to put that kid in danger, do ya?"
Dawn prickled at that comment but at one look from Faith didn't say anything in her defense. Instead she grumbled to herself, "I'm not a kid…"
Faith, having turned back to the woman she was conversing with, took another second to think it over before replying, "Alright, we'll have to take you up on that offer."
The woman motioned for them to follow her, and they did. They walked up a flight of stairs and into a small apartment above the bar. "The name's Ellen," the woman stated after closing the door behind them. "I own the bar and this is my home." She looked at her three guests expectantly.
"Faith," Faith said pointing to herself, "Dawn, Spike," she continued pointing to each of them as well.
Ellen nodded. "Well I'd talk more, but I have to get back downstairs. This," she said as she led them to a spare bedroom, "is where 'Spike' can sleep." She continued of to the next room. "You girls can stay in here. This was my daughter's room but she recently moved out so there should be plenty of room for the two of you. Bathroom's down the hall, towels are in the closet across the hall from it. I don't want no hanky panky while you stay here. I'm not running a brothel. As far as I can tell, none of ya'll are married, no rings, and I'm a moral sort of a person. Other than that, make yourselves at home." Then she left.
Dawn and Faith both looked at Spike and then at each other and burst out laughing. Dawn was the first to stop enough to say, "Now, I don't want no hanky panky going on here. I'm not running a brothel here."
Faith's laughing had subsided to, "God, I can't believe we're stuck in the middle of Hicksville, USA. I can't wait to get out of here in the morning." Dawn started laughing again.
Finally, Spike spoke up, "Yeah, well, while you two birds are laughing it up, I'm worrying about the possible problem we may have on out hands here."
"Oh, and what's that?" Faith asked.
"Well," continued Spike, "While you were discussing room and board down there I overheard some of the other conversations going on."
"You mean you were eavesdropping." Dawn smiled.
"Well, duh," Spike rolled his eyes, "It doesn't matter anyway. The point is I heard what they were talking about. And the word 'hunt' came up a lot."
"So, what, this is a bar for hunters or something." Faith kicked off her boots and flopped on the bed. "What's so bad about that? A lot of these hick people get their kicks off of shooting Bambi."
"Yeah, except there was something else I kept hearing too," Spike continued, "they also mentioned quite a few times names of demons, references to other supernatural beings. Mostly ghosts. They definitely knew what they were talking about though."
Faith sat up fast. "Do you think they're helping the demons or something. 'Hunting' humans or whatever for ritual sacrifices or some shit?"
Spike shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe. Or maybe they were talking about hunting the demons themselves. Some people sell demons parts for evil spells performed by ordinary humans. Either way, the outcome's not good."
Dawn let of a big yawn. "Well then, I guess we better get to work."
Faith glanced over at her youngest companion. "Nuh uh, little D, we've had a long day and you're barely awake now. I'm kinda beat myself. I say we rest tonight and confront that Ellen chick in the morning."
"You think she knows anything?" Dawn asked.
"Yeah, I think she does," Faith answered. "It's her bar, and those people down there are probably regulars. Shit, this place is probably a meeting ground people like them." She turned to Spike, "You and me are taking turns staying awake tonight. Be on guard in case something does happen." Spike nodded.
"Hey, what about me?" Dawn asked, annoyed that once again they weren't trusting her to handle any of the heavy work.
"You need more sleep than we do, nibblet," Spike answered simply. He turned to Faith, "I'll take the first shift. I'm not as tired as you." Faith nodded and Spike retreated to his room.
The night went by uneventful. Ellen finally came up just after 2am and went straight to bed. After 4am hit and still nothing had happened, Spike decided not to wake Faith up for her shift and just went to sleep himself. He figured if they were going to try anything, they'd had done it by then.
Faith woke up in the morning to sunlight streaming through the blinds right into her eyes. She sat up in bed and gathered her bearings before jumping out of bed. She quickly threw on her black jeans from the night before and stormed her way to Spike's room. Not even bothering to knock on the door, she let herself in and pushed the vampire off the bed and into a patch of sunlight of the floor. Spike jumped up and patted out the small fire and that had started on his leg.
"What the bloody hell was that for?" he yelled.
"You were supposed to wake me up last night for guard duty, that's what."
"Yeah, well," Spike replied, "I figured nothing was going to happen since I stayed up till four, two hours after our 'hostess' returned, and only succeeded in being extremely bored. I figured you could use the few extra hours of sleep anyway."
Faith was touched by Spike consideration of her well-being, though she in no way let on that she was. "Speaking of Ellen," she said, "We need to find her and play a little game of truth or dare. Emphasis on the truth."
Spike pulled out a short sword he had hidden in his duster. Faith ran to her room to throw on her jacket and grab her own crossbow before meeting Spike in the hall.
"She's not in the apartment so she's probably downstairs." Spike stated.
"Fine. We'll leave Dawnie here while we question Ellen, let her get a little more sleep." Faith led the way downstairs. The duo quietly crept their way toward the bar. Ellen was downstairs but she wasn't alone. She was talking to someone. That someone she was talking to turned out to be male.
"Well, in the meantime, got any other cases that need working on?" the male voice asked.
Ellen snorted. "Haven't you ever been told that all work and no play makes Dean a dull boy?"
Someone else snorted, "Dean's anything but dull," another male voice chirped.
"Thanks, Sammy," the first voice, Dean, cheerfully replied.
"That wasn't a compliment, Dean," the second voice said, "and don't call me Sammy."
"So," Dean continued, pretending like he didn't hear anything, "how long do you think it'll be before Ash comes back?"
"A couple of days at least," Ellen answered, "He didn't really say."
Faith turned to Spike, "I don't know about you, but I'm tired of listening to this crap." Spike nodded his head. Faith raised her crossbow and headed out into the bar. Spike followed, his sword at the ready. "Alright, everyone hands where I can see them," Faith ordered. The three occupants at the bar turned to her and stared, but no one moved. When Faith repeated her order, they slowly raised their hands.
"Alright, everyone listen up," Faith continued. "I know that something's going on here, that something was going on here last night. What I don't know is just what exactly it is, so you're going to tell me. Now."
Dean snorted and lowered his hands, "Listen here, sweetheart, I don't know what you're talking about. Now why don't you put down the weapon and behave like a good little girl and maybe I'll give you a nice treat."
Faith scowled at Dean, "I don't think so. I've never been a 'good little girl' and I sure as hell don't want to have sex with scum like you."
Sam cover-coughed a chuckle and Dean glared at him before turning back to the brunette and replying, "Whatever. Just put the crossbow down. What's with the crossbow anyway? Wouldn't, say, a gun, be a little more threatening?"
Faith smirked, "The crossbow works just fine. Now, why don't you tell us what you know about demons and what exactly do you mean when you talk about 'hunting'?"
Dean was just about the retort when they heard a scream from upstairs. Taking advantage of the newcomer's distraction, Dean kicked the crossbow out of Faith hands and grabbed it for himself. Sam performed a similar maneuver on an equally distracted Spike.
"Hey!" Faith exclaimed, turning her attention back to Dean.
Dean just smirked in return, "Now who's in charge." Before he could continue, another scream came from upstairs. Spike ran towards the apartment. Faith looked from the stairs, to Dean, to her crossbow in Dean's hands before booking up the stairs herself. The other three bar occupants just looked at each other before following the distressed pair. The scene they walked into was not a pleasant one. Dawn was sitting on a chair it the kitchen while Faith paced in front of her. Spike was leaning on the counter just watching.
"Dammit Dawn!" Faith exclaimed without stopping her pacing. "You know better than to scream unless you're really in danger. Spike and I were in the middle of something!"
"Just what exactly is going on here?" Ellen asked at the entrance to her apartment. Sam and Dean stood on either side of her, brandishing their stolen weapons.
"Little bit here saw a spider," answered the blonde vampire casually.
"I did not see a spider," exclaimed the exasperated brunette throwing up her hands. "A spider was in my hair, and you'd have screamed too if you had one in yours." She stuck her tongue out. Dean and Sam lowered their weapons.
Faith stopped her pacing and sat down beside Dawn. "Dawnie, you've got to be more careful. You know how serious this situation is. What if we had been in the middle of a serious fight instead of interrogating Mr. Charming here and the Jolly Green Giant?"
"She's right, nibblet," Spike agreed. "We could have seriously gotten hurt and then who would protect you?"
Dawn harrumphed. "I can take care of myself," she grumbled as she crossed her arms.
Spike sat down on the other side of her. "Not like we can," he gently replied.
The three were interrupted by someone clearing their throat. They turned to look at Dean who was waving Faith's crossbow. "Did you forget about us? You did just threaten us with a couple medieval weapons. I'd kinda like to know why. You know, curiosity."
"How do you know about demons?" Faith asked, slipping her game face back on.
"We hunt them," Dean simply stated.
"It's not so you can sell their parts for curses or anything is it?" Dawn asked.
"Uh, no…" Sam warily replied.
"Well then…?" Spike asked expectantly.
"We kill them, pure and simple," answered Dean. "You know, good vs. evil, save people's lives. That sort of thing. What about you? How do you know about demons? You're not into the demon parts market, are ya? Because if you are, then we have a problem."
"I'm a slayer." Faith stated expectantly.
The boys looked at each other and then back at Faith. Sam was the one to speak up, "What is that supposed to mean?" he asked.
Faith looked at them incredulously. "You mean to tell me, that you hunt demons, but you don't know what a slayer is."
"I do," Ellen finally spoke up. "I've heard of a Slayer. One girl in all the world with the power to fight the forces of darkness. Last I heard though, she was petite and blonde, and you're not."
"That's my sister," Dawn spoke up, "the petite blonde Slayer. She's back home right now, probably wondering why we haven't checked in."
"You're right about that," came a voice from the guest room. All heads turned toward the voice, and out walked Buffy and Willow. Willow looked at Dawn apologetically. "What's rule number one?" Buffy asked.
"Don't die?" Faith supplied knowing that wasn't the rule she was referring to.
"Alright, fine. Rule number two then." Buffy crossed her arms expectantly.
Faith rolled her eyes and sighed. "Always check in when you're supposed to."
"Right. So, you going to tell me why you couldn't possibly follow that rule?" Buffy continued.
Faith threw her hands up in the air. "What was I supposed to do, B? Our car broke down and we're stuck in the middle of nowhere."
"That's what the satellite phone is for, F."
"Yeah, well," Faith said while looking at Dawn, "Someone didn't charge it last like they were supposed to." Dawn looked away guiltily.
Buffy walked to stand in front of her sister. She didn't have to ask Dawn if it was true; she could tell by her body language. Buffy frowned at her. "Is this a game to you, Dawn? Because me, I'm taking it very seriously. We're trying to protect your life here, Dawn, and your irresponsibility is not helping."
"Uh, hello?" Dean said again, clearly annoyed at being ignored. "As touching as this is, we're still standing here."
Buffy turned to the annoying yet incredibly hot man with… Faith's crossbow. She mentally sighed about that before snapping, "Excuse me, we're having a family moment here. You're going to have to wait your turn. Don't worry, you're next." She turned back to Dawn expectantly.
Dawn rolled her eyes. "I can take care of myself, Buffy," she said for the second time that hour.
"Not good enough, Dawn. That's something I can't risk."
Dawn stood up angrily. "So what am I supposed to do, Buffy?" she yelled, "Run away for the rest of my life?"
Buffy crossed her arms again. "If it keeps you safe, then yes."
Dawn narrowed her eyes at her sister. "What's the point of living if I can't live?" Dawn pushed past her and ran out of the apartment.
Buffy was about to run after her but Willow put her hand on her arm and stopped her. "Don't. She's needs some time alone. Let her cool off first." Buffy was hesitant at first, then all of a sudden her body relaxed and she let out a big sigh. Buffy nodded her head and sat down in the chair Dawn had just been occupying, laying her head in her hands. No one noticed when Sam slipped to go follow Dawn.
Everyone stood still for a moment until Faith spoke up. "Hey B, I know now isn't the best time, but what do we do about them?" she said jerking her thumb to Ellen and Dean.
Buffy didn't even look up. "So what's their story?" she asked Faith.
Dean opened his mouth to say what I'm sure what a sarcastic remark but Ellen spoke up before he got the chance. "Dean and Sam here are hunters. They hunt the supernatural, mostly ghosts, but demons and other such things too. They have been since their momma died when they were little; learned it from their dad. My husband was a hunter too. This bar is where hunters meet up to swap info and regroup."
Buffy nodded her head in her hands as if she was too exhausted to put up a fight. Faith, however, still had some questions. "So, what, you all hunt around here? 'Cause there can't be that many nasties floating around here. It's practically deserted for one; bad guys like good guys to prey on."
"No, actually, we travel around the country looking for clues to supernatural phenomena," Dean supplied. He looked proud that he used such a big word. "Of course, we often don't have to look far. My brother Sam's a big trouble magnet."
Buffy's head shot up. Her overprotective-sister sense kicked in. She looked around the room and realized what she feared was true; Sam was not there. "Where's Sam?" she asked Dean.
Dean looked behind him and finally realized that Sam was no longer there. Ellen spoke up, "He went after your sister. Mumbled something about overprotective older siblings breathing down their necks." She looked pointedly at Dean and Buffy.
Buffy got out of her chair. "This is not good."
"Why," asked Dean, deciding to not play stupid for once. "They're fine. It's only been a few minutes. Besides, it's daylight. The bad guys usually attack at night."
Buffy snorted. "Yeah well, you said your brother was a big trouble magnet? My sister's the biggest. Put them together and…"
"This is not good," Dean finished.
As if on cue, they heard a crash from downstairs. Buffy and Dean looked to one another, matching looks on their faces, and sprinted down the stairs to the bar. The others quickly followed.
"Sam. Sammy!" Dean bellowed when he couldn't find his brother.
"Dawn!" Buffy yelled.
Together, then ran out of the bar. "Do you see them?" asked Dean, eyes darting in every direction.
"No," said Buffy. "Dawn! Dawnie, where are you?"
"Sam! I swear to God if this is a joke I am so going to kick your ass."
"They're not here," all heads turned to Spike. "They were, but now they're not."
"How the hell do you know?" Dean asked.
"Because I can't smell them," replied Spike. "Someone took them, and I know who."