Title: Stuff-Toy Zabini
Rated: PG 13 for small swearing
Category: Multi-Chapters
Genre: Romance and possibly Humour
Pairings: Hermione G. / Blaise Z.
Comments: Credits for the wonderful inspiration probably goes to Un Petit Diable and her artwork (I love the Staring Contest and the Can't He Smile Like a Normal Person one! Go RIN!) Oh and don't forget my stuff-toy Donkey. It's probably the biggest inspiration of all. (Yes, his name really is Donkey.)
Full Summary: Blaise is turned into a stuff-toy Donkey and its all Hermione's fault. Because she feels quite guilty, she houses the life-like (That means it can walk and hop while creating a comical sight.) donkey. (Thank god it doesn't take up much space.) When she learns that Blaise can turn back into a human during 12 a.m. to 12 p.m. and that he can be cured and changed into his normal self when Hermione kisses him and have no prejudice or stupid hatred towards him. But Hermione will never kiss the ex-Slytherin, right?
Saturday : 9 p.m.
"YOU- YOU- YOU DEATH EATER!" screamed the twenty- one Hermione Granger, her wand pointing at Blaise Zabini. Her bushy, curly brown hair was flying everywhere as her voice shook with rage but her wand hand kept steady and it was never pointed down from the man.
"You'd think a Mudblood bookworm would learn how to insult people better." Blaise retorted angrily, whipping out his wand. He asked himself why he didn't do it before and he didn't have an answer for himself. He shrugged inwardly and muttered with gritted teeth as if he wanted to shoot Hermione with the worse spell he knew but he had settled for another one, "Donkey Effercio Toy!"
Hermione didn't know what spell he was using (She was quite angry at herself.) but quickly and instinctively cast a strong Protego charm that allowed the spell directed at her to bounce of the shield and cast itself on Blaise. She lowered down her wand as her eyes watched hungrily for the reaction.
She had expected something bad.
What she didn't expect was that Zabini had turned into a blue donkey but it wasn't any donkey. It was a donkey that Hermione had thrown away when she was ten because she said it was old and uncool. (At that age, Hermione was very self-conscious and wanted to fit in and no ten-year old had a stuff donkey, she had told her parents.) Her reaction was a very shocked expression as she rushed to it and picked it up carefully.
"What happened?" she asked softly.
"You bloody happened, that's what," said a bitter voice as the donkey opened its mouth.
She almost dropped the donkey. In fact, she did but managed to catch it before it fell to the ground and that was when she was convinced that the voice screaming at her was Blaise. "YOU ALMOST DROPPED ME, YOU MAD WOMAN!" Yes, his voice was definitely Blaise's. His voice had a lazy drawl to it and it could be screeching loud when he wanted it to be and Hermione wished that she could smack the stuff-toy but he would probably end up laughing at her because, after all, donkeys cannot be hurt physically. That didn't exactly explain why he was scared of her dropping him.
As if Blaise the donkey had read his mind, he said, "I will get dirty, you bumbling idiot. But of course, you wouldn't know the feeling. You are a Mudblood." He spat the last word out and Hermione 'accidentally' dropped him into the mud and she was about to stalk off when Blaise screamed out, "OI! You can't just leave me here!"
Hermione turned around and was about to challenge him when she saw the comical sight. Blaise was trying to get to her by hopping and he was succeeding. He scrunched up his face, kind of squeezed his hands and sort of squatted down, well, not exactly, but you get my gist, and hopped. Despite Blaise's effort, he was only able to hop a few small steps compared to Hermione's quick strides. She started snorting and laughing hysterically and her hand went up to her mouth as she giggled.
"Oh, yeah, sure, laugh." said Blaise indignantly and if he could fold his cross his arms, he certainly would. His tone of voice made Hermione stop laughing loudly and pay attention to him.
"Well, what do you want me to do?" Hermione asked, putting her hands on her hips and glaring at the donkey.
"Do you not have a conscience!" screamed Blaise, throwing his large and no-finger arms around.
Hermione sighed and picked Blaise up. She held him out at arms-length and asked him, "Well, what am I going to do with you?" She ran a hand through her hair and in a matter of seconds, her hand disappeared. If Blaise hadn't known better, he'd have thought that her hand had been eaten by a hair monster. Er, not that there was anything like that, of course.
"How 'bout take me back to your place?" Blaise asked hopefully.
She shrugged and said, "Might as well."
"I need to go to the washroom."
Hermione laughed, grabbed a toothbrush and laid Darlie toothpaste over it. She rinsed her mouth and started brushing while she turned around and told Blaise, "Donkeys don't need to go the washroom."
Blaise's tone was indignant. "Oh, yeah? Well this donkey does!"
She spitted and rinsed her mouth again. She faced Blaise with an amused but weary expression and attempted to tell Blaise that no, donkeys do not use the washroom, not even magical ones. But before she could open her mouth, Blaise interrupted with a sharp high-pitched scream.
"IS IT TOO HARD FOR IT TO GO THROUGH YOUR THICK STUPID MIND? I- NEED- TO- GO- TO- THE- WASHROOM! DO I NEED TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?"
Hermione instantly raised her hands to her ears. She was quite tempted to let Blaise use the washroom but a little voice in her head said, "No, don't let Blaise have everything. He's already spoiled enough. It's up to you to show him that if he's gonna live with you, he's not gonna get everything he wants." She wholeheartedly agreed and started singing a random song to block out Blaise's scream.
She was about to walk out when she heard a whooshing sound and a "Look! You made me pee on the floor! Eww!" She sighed resignedly and turned around. Yes, there was pee on the floor. Her eyes widened as she stared at the yellow colour. "Oh- my- gawd." She turned to Blaise and switched on an apologetic voice, "I'm so sorry, I thought you were joking." She grabbed a towel and immediately started wiping it up, while pinching her nose.
"Yeah, well, now you know." replied Blaise, hopping out.
Hermione Granger awoke with a sleeping Blaise Zabini on her. He wasn't the donkey now; he was the handsome man with black, curly hair and olive-coloured skin. The first thing she did was screamed. And that awoke Blaise Zabini who groaned and rolled off Hermione. He widened as he found himself on Hermione and started muttering, "Oh my god, what's my dad gonna say? I slept with a Mudblood, I slept with a Mudblood. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. Mum's gonna kill me, Mum's gonna kill me."
"I can hear you, y'know," snapped Hermione and cringed as her morning breath brought itself to its nose. She looked down at herself and relaxed; her clothes were still there. Apparently, Blaise was thinking the same thing and he too looked relieved. "Weren't you a donkey before?" she asked, furrowing her brow as she looked at Blaise.
Blaise shrugged and sighed heavily as he slowly closed his eyes. He hummed softly as his body relaxed and he buried his face on the bed. He was about to drift off when Hermione shook him. Blaise groaned, "Ugh, well, that was rude." Hermione rolled her eyes.
"I don't care, Zabini, we just have to find a cure. I can't exactly want to see you right beside me when I wake up, you know." She got off the bed and clutched her blanket. She immediately folded it up and told Blaise, "Okay, now we strip and then..." She gestured to the bed. "I'm sure you know what happens next." She smiled.
Blaise was confused. "Uh, I never knew you wanted me..." he said, trailing off as he nervously started unbuttoning his pajama shirt. He was interrupted by Hermione who grabbed his hand and said, "Whoa there, big boy. When I said strip and make the bed, I meant take the covers off and put on new ones."
"Oh, right, knew that. Just wanted to horse around, you know?" he chuckled shakily.
"Sure," said Hermione sarcastically, rolling her eyes.
A/N: Well, how do you like that one? Now, it's my first time trying to write a BlaiseHermione fanfics so don't flame me. All I want is constructive criticism and of course, compliments to go with it. Please review! Reviewers get a Blaise donkey and human!