All characters and all rights at 'NCIS: Los Angeles' belong to CBS and Shane Brennan Productions. The following story does not serve any commercial purposes, but was written only for the pleasure of fans. An injury of Copyright is not intended. All further persons belong to the authoress.
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Chapter 1 - Back Into The Past
She stood at the door and was relieved. Done. Energetically Joann knocked. It did not last long, before the door was opened to her.
"Jo, my Little One!" Two strong arms clasped her, pressed Joann strongly and nevertheless affectionately to a broad chest. With great affection she returned the embrace. "Come in, dear." After he had closed the door, he looked searchingly at Joann. "Little One, you don't look good. Sit down and tell me what happened."
Joann looked around in the room, which was so familiar to her, breathed in the slight scent of lemon. It seemed to have changed nothing. And then Joann burst into tears, trembling all over. Immediately, she was clasped back into his arms. "Shhh, Little One, everything will be fine. Whatever it is, we'll get it." He gently rocked her in his arms.
After what seemed like an eternity Joann had calmed down. The tears dried up and only lead tiredness remaind. "Little One, you're going to sleep now. The bed is freshly made, in the bathroom hang clean towels. If you have rested, we will talk. All right?"
Joann nodded. "Thanks." She gave him a kiss on the cheek.
When Joann was awake, it was broad daylight. She cast a puzzled look on her clock. My goodness, she had slept twenty hours! Joann quickly took a shower and then went with a growling stomach in the kitchen. On the table, a message was lying. ,Little One, the fridge is full, you take what you want. I'm back soon.' After looking in the refrigerator Joann had to smile. Nothing but the things she liked to eat. So she got going.
...
Thoughtfully Joann looked at the prepaid mobile phone in her hand. She had to send a message to G, she owed him that. He probably was worried about her. But what should she tell him? Joann did not want to lie, but she was not ready for the truth, at least not by phone. She sighed, then Joann dialed.
"Hy, G, it's me, Jo. I'm fine, I'm in New York, with… friends. I'm sorry, but I need something you can't give me at the moment. As soon as I'm back, I'll explain everything. I lost my phone, please ask Eric to look for it. Unfortunately, I've first noticed it at the airport when I wanted to call you. You can get me unter this number, if it should be necessary. G, please never forget one thing: I love you, I will come back."
Joann had dialed direct to Callen's mailbox. She could not talk to him now. First she had to come to terms with herself.
…
"Hello, Little One, where have you been?"
Smiling, she bent down and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Getting a bit of fresh air. I had to make a phone call."
Frowning, he looked at her. "A secure line?"
"A prepaid mobile phone. For a secure line, I would have had to go to the NCIS office. I didn't want that."
"Will you tell me now what's going on?"
Joann nodded slowly. "Yes. R.J. has appeared again."
One by one, Joann reported what had happened. She didn't betray any secrets, but otherwise Joann left nothing unmentioned. It took quite a while until she was ready. A long silence ensued.
"Ah, Little One, I'm so sorry. Good thing it's over now."
"It's not over."
"Why? After all what you told me, Davenport won't come out of jail anymore."
"It's not about R.J., it's about me. For me it is not over. I still have nightmares, sometimes I react totally illogical. And then there is still my suspension..."
"I can't tell you what's up on your suspension or if you will get in troble for aynthing else. But your nightmares and your illogical behavior are normal, after what Davenport has done to you."
They looked at each other seriously. "There is something else... When I was in the hospital, did the doctors tell you what happened to me?"
"Sure, I was your next of kin. Why?"
"I have no idea how to say it, but has he...did R.J..."
"What, Little One?"
"Did he abuse me?" Finally it was out.
"How do you say that?"
Joann hesitated before she answered. "There are so many little things: Started with the nightmares, my reservations about men. For a log time I could not endure if I was touched by one. Trust is also such a point. Sometimes I find it even hard to trust my colleagues and friends. Or G. The strange behavior of Nate and Hetty in this case. Something that Nate said about the fact that I defended myself against R.J., a thing I can't remember. Well, that's the main point that I can't remember. Nate thinks that I maybe repress something." Joann swallowed. "As an investigator I can conclude from all this just one thing: the woman in question has been abused."
He sighed. "I'm so sorry, Little One, I was hoping that you would never remember." He sighed again. "Yes, you're right."
"I still do not remember, I drew only a conclusion."
"You maybe don't want to hear that, but this is the better way."
Joann just looked at him.
"However, Little One, believe me, it is better. Even if it takes a while until you realize that."
Tears ran down Joann's face, but she didn't make a sound.
"My Little One..." Again she was lovingly clasped into his arms. He simply waited.
Finally, Joann regained. "So now what? What should I do now?" The clever, distanced agent had become an anxious, sad woman.
"Well, there are some things. Talk to your psychologist. If he can't help you, he surely can tell you someone who can. Talk to G. If he is as smart as you always say, he will have his own thought on this matter. Your colleagues probably, too." His serious eyes became loving. "Have confidence in them. They have never disappointed you yet, right?"
"No, never..."
"Well, then."
In silence the two sat together, hung by their thoughts. Joann closed her eyes, took the tranquility and the familiar atmosphere in her.
"Thanks."
A soft laugh answered her. "Always, my Little One. And what are you doing with the rest of your forced free time?"
"I will spend it with my favorite New Yorker!"
This time he laughed out loud.
…
"Hi, I'm back!" In good mood Joann came back from a walk. The time here did her well, gave her the strength she needed.
"Hello, Little One!"
Joann spun around and fell laughing into the outstretched arms. "Big One! What are you doing here?"
"I could ask you that, too!" Lovingly Joann was punched. "Here I come to tell my news, and who is also here, after an eternity? Our Little One! Unbelievable!" Once again, Joann was hugged and squeezed. "So, what are you doing here?"
Joann cast a questioning look and in reply she received only a shake of the head. "R.J., we have arrested him in Los Angeles. There was some trouble and I needed a break and already I was here. Tell me, what are you doing here."
"Little One, what did you do?"
But this time, Joann shook her head. "No, not now. Your turn. What news?"
He knew Joann long enough to know that she would talk when she wanted, not when he wanted.
"I will be removed to another post again. This time it is Los Angeles."
The surprised face of Joann let him break out in laughter.
"You will more often have to endure me in future."
"You really come to L.A.?"
"Yes, definitely. I was told out a few days ago. I was near, at a conference, and wanted to deliver the message personally. Well, here I am."
"When has time come?"
"A will last a little. I have two cases that I have to bring to an end. All others I can hand off, but not these two. Maybe in a month."
The beaming smile on Joann's face deepened. "Wow, it will be great, to see you again regularly."
"There they are reunited, the Small One and the Big One." A gentle smile enclosed the two. "I'm going to prepare dinner. Surely you two will have to tell you a lot."
Joann's lips silently formed 'Thank you!', then she has devoted her entire attention to the man at her side.
When he came to get the two to dinner, they didn't even notice his appearence. As in the old days, they sat side by side on the stairs and talked incessantly. Joann had snuggled into his arms, also a familiar sight. For the first time since her arrival, she was relaxed and happy. He suddenly wanted to be able to see this sight more often. Slowly an idea began to take shape in his head.
The meal was full of laughter. Between the three of them was a long familiarity. Although they had not seen each other for quiet a while, it was as if their last meeting has been just yesterday. The shadow that had lain on Joann, had disappeared.