Cue: From Enide-Dear, part of the ten firsts on deviantART, requested a Reno and Reeve ficy… with the cue words "Here kitty, kitty, kitty."
Rating: T
BETA: Self beta… Is there any glaring errors?
Warning: Stalker behaviour. Reno, (because we should always be warned when it comes to Reno) Cait abuse and Reeve gets all formal in his speech patterns
Disclaimer: Don't own FF7 Fandom, just using for my own amusement. Do not profit from this endeavour.
Characters: Reno, Reeve and Cait.
POV: Reno

STALKER

Rude told him that he was being difficult.

Tseng had sighed and patiently asked him if he needed a vacation.

Rufus told him that he needed to up his medication.

Elena snorted and said something to the effect that it was about time.

He was certain that someone was watching him and he wasn't being paranoid, despite of what everyone was saying. It was like an itch that he couldn't scratch. It felt as if there were eyes always on the back of his neck. It was making him nervous and edgy; it caused him to jump at the smallest of sounds.

He could hardly sleep at night with the worry of someone out to get him. He had pissed off a lot of people in his life and he was worried that someone was finally going to get back at him. He knew that was always a possibility with being a Turk and a prankster but he had always thought it would be over quick. This lingering feeling of being followed was pure torture.

He had to trick Rude into letting him stay at his place by telling him that his apartment was being fumigated for bedbugs. He had to sleep on the lumpy couch, as Rude was being a prude about sharing his bed. He slept a little better knowing Rude was in the next room, but it didn't make the uneasy feeling go away.

He was certain he was being watched despite everyone's assurances that it was all in his head.

He had been feeling this for more than a month and he finally figured out who the culprit was.

A small gold crown, that he briefly spotted before it disappeared around a corner, gave him his first clue. He had, at first, thought it was odd but had brushed it aside. It wasn't until the next day when he spotted a tuft of fur from a cat's tail disappear behind a vehicle that he took notice.

He felt relieved that he wasn't being paranoid after all.

Now he just had to figure out why he was being followed by Cait.

He had no idea why it would be following him around but his first instinct was just to ignore the cat and it hope that it would go away. The thing's programming was probably screwed up or something.

Ignoring the spy was easier said than done. He spotted the ever increasing annoyance where ever he went. Cait was under the table in the conference room, outside the window of Tseng's office, under the couch in the break room and hiding under the sink in Rufus' office bathroom.

The worst was when he saw eyes peering down at him from the duct work in the washroom while he was 'busy'; it was the last straw and he was going to put an end to it.

He had the bag specially made so that once he caught the pesky robotic cat, it wouldn't be able to get out.

He had it gripped firmly in his hand and he was waiting for the perfect opportunity to catch the wretched fur-ball. He knew the small stalker's routine now. He knew how he followed him through the main lobby way and it followed the same pattern every time and Reno was going to use that to his advantage.

He walked through the hallway and spotted the shadow of his prey. He couldn't hold back a smile as he gripped the bag painfully in his hand.

He waited until he turned the corner and he heard the movement. A sound that was so low that if you weren't paying attention, you would have missed it. It meant that the little prowler was on the move and it was time for action.

He dashed forward, flipping the bag open. He heard the scramble of pawed feet as Cait tried to make it to its hiding spot. He lunged, trying to catch it before it disappeared into the modern sculpture in the middle of the lobby.

He missed as he watched Cait nimbly climb up the statue and look down at him with fear filled eyes.

Reno let out a growl and through clenched teeth spoke, "Here kitty, kitty, kitty."

"I can explain," Cait responded, looking a little scared. Reno narrowed his eyes as he examined the twisted metal sculpture as he tried to formulate a way to get at his target.

"You're gonna do a lot of explain', yo." Reno pulled out his EMR and extended it.

Cait seemed to realize the position that he was in. "Now, ya don' need to be doin' anythin' drastic, laddie." Cait was frantically looking for an escape route.

Reno grinned, knowing that it must have looked malicious, and sparked his rod as he moved towards the metal statue.

Reno was quite pleased to see Reeve looking all ruffled as he walked into the office. He was frantically typing at his computer and had a phone pressed against his ear. Reeve was so focused on the screen that he did not observe Reno until he threw the wiggling bag on his desk with a loud thump.

The bearded man gave a startled yelp and blanched.

Reeve's dark eyes darted between him and then the squirming bag. Reeve opened his mouth and gaped like a fish.

"Missin' somethin'?" Reno said as he walked around the desk. Reeve dropped his phone as he scrambled up from his chair, nearly causing it to crash to the floor.

"I-I can explain," Reeve stammered. There was some muffled yells coming from the bag, but Reno ignored them.

"You are gonna do a lot of explainin', Reeve," Reno said, still walking forward. He allowed his smile to get wider and he could see the worry written across Reeve's face. "How long has that scruffy thing been followin' me around, yo?"

Reeve had to stop walking as his back hit the wall. Reno took this opportunity to make sure that he wasn't going to get away from him. He slammed his hands beside Reeve's shoulders and got a very satisfying grunt from him. Reno could see the sweat form on Reeve's brow as he visibly swallowed.

"Well?"

Reeve gulped and squeaked out, "What?"

"How long have you been stalking me!?" Reno snarled and leaned in close to the man's face. He could hear Reeve's breathing quicken and see his eyes grow bigger. He could feel his nervousness and his face was even flushed.

"Uh. I –I," Reeve stammered. "A c-couple of months."

"Why? Are you doing this to keep a better eye on me, yo? I haven't wrecked anythin' in a year or screwed up a mission. Did Tseng or Rufus put you up to this?" Reno snarled and leaned a little closer; so that they were almost touching noses. Reeve's made a whimpering sound and he swallowed loudly. He watched as Reeve nervously licked his lips and gave him a look that Reno couldn't quite read.

"I was j-just… I wanted… uh."

"Jus' spit it out man!" Cait's voice came from the table. Reno turned his head to see that the slightly scorched cat had somehow opened the bag. The small spy jumped from the desk and scurried out the door.

Reno turned his attention back to the Head of the Urban Development department and saw an uncertain look on his face.

"What's your spy talkin' about?" Reno demanded.

Reeve took in a deep breath and let it out. "I will show you," Reeve said in a confident voice. Reno leaned back a little, glad that his intimidation was going to get him the answers he wanted.

He was not expecting Reeve to lean into him. He felt one of Reeve's soft hands slide around his neck and another cup his cheek, as his mouth pressed against his. He had not been expecting this. His arms fell to his side as took a step back, out of the kiss.

Reeve put his hands behind his back, looked at the floor and chewed his lip, all the confidence he had before the kiss was gone. "Was it to presumptuous of me?"

Reno gave himself a mental shake as he listened to Reeve start to talk.

"I wanted to become better acquainted with you and I didn't know how to proceed in my advancements because of my position within the company and I didn't and … well… I deduced that you were with Rude since you've been residing with him and I just… and… er, yeah." Reeve was still looking at the floor and he moved his hands so that they were stuffed in the pockets of his long coat, hunching his shoulders slightly. "I've been acting like a hormonal adolescent. I meant to call off Cait when you started dwelling with Rude, but I was still inquisitive as to what you were accomplishing. I will make certain that Cait no longer is inconveniencing you." Reeved let out a heavy sigh and started to walk away.

Reno blinked as he looked at the back of the man as he deciphered what Reeve had just said. "Yo!"

Reeve stopped walking but didn't turn around.

"I'm not with Rude that way."

Reeve turned around, looking extremely embarrassed. "Really?" His blushing was really quite becoming.

Reno smirked at the other man and plopped himself down in Reeve's leather office chair. "So, now that we got that straightened out, why don't you try that kiss again. You gotta lot to apologize for takin' so damn long to tell me."

So what do you think Enide-Dear?? Does it meet your expectations?

Now... I like the idea of Cait being a sentient AI survallenace thingy.... Reeve still has a large infulence on the cat but Cait is still its own being. They hint at it in FFVII... I do not think that Cait is a avatar as it were but an information gathering unit doing the will of Reeve and programed from Reeve and Reeve is able to go through the information recieved from Cait.

Does that make any sort of sense? Ah. I am running with it anyway.

Does this qualify as a crack fic??