A/N – This is a parody of the life of the Olympians (they're OOC) that popped in my mind at the zoo. We were watching the geese and one of them started clapping its wings like it wanted to fly. My friend started singing I Believe I Can Fly and I thought: Hey that sounds like something Apollo would do, thou his sacred animals may vary from crows to dolphins to mice, but it's equally dumb (Really sorry, Apollo, please, don't zap me… can I pull the father-daughter-favor card?) , because geese don't fly and wow, I'm ADHD… And I thought, why don't I turn the Olympians to their sacred animals and dump them at the zoo? Ha ha, that would be hilarious. Reason 2 is that I recently had a really bad heartbreak (you could send me a hug with the review… if you send a review) and I needed a laugh. Sorry for this awfully long AN, it won't happen again. So, let's start the story!

Cast (legend)

Zeus - Zeagle

Hera - Heracock (A/N - LOL Totally awsome coincidence!) or Peahera

Poseidon - Posy pony or Horseidon

Athena - Athy owl or Owlthena

Hermes - Hermy snake

Artemis - Arty doe

Ares - Aresdog or Aresboar (A/N - Lame, I know)

Aphrodite - Aphy dove

Hephaestus - Hephy donkey

Demeter - Demy swine (Sorry…)

Dionysus - Diony tiger

Apollo - Apomouse

Chapter 1

Kicked out of Nemesis' temple show

Artemis and Apollo were fighting. Again. It was Apollo's fault. As always. Nothing new on Olympus. This time Apollo said jackalopes are lame.

"They're weak and bunny-looking! It's shame to our kind!" He stated.

"They're better than men in the first place!" Artemis argued.

"I'm so much hotter, stronger, and less furry than a jackalope and don't you dare say otherwise!" Apollo was red in rage.

"Oh, Boo hoo, cry me a river! That's exactly why your sacred animal is a mouse!" Artemis mocked the tomato-looking god. "And you're definitely not less furry – no, hairy – than a jackalope. I'm not arguing with you anymore, because you're going to infect me with your stupidity. Peace out, sucker!"

When she said that, she spun on her heels and left the pwned god with need of anger management classes. Apollo was angry. Like really angry. Like angrier than the time when Hermes stole his bellbottom jeans to go to a club with that girl… what was her name…? May! Yes, he stole Apollo's bellbottom jeans to go to a club with a girl named May… So, back to the topic – Apollo was angry. He decided to make a haiku to relieve himself. That didn't sound right… He made a haiku to relieve his anger. Yep, anger. Here it goes:

I am so awesome.

Better than a jackalope.

Artemis is annoying.

Sucky as ever, but Apollo had a different point of view. Perfect, he thought, But I'm still angry… I got it! I'll take revenge! He laughed maniacally and went to Nemesis' to seek his revenge. Literally.

At Nemesis':

"HEY, NEEEMYYY!" He CAPS LOCKed once he passed the doorsteps. "I NEED REVEEEN-"

He was interrupted by a hand covering his mouth. It was Nemesis, who had just materialized in front of him and was blocking his CAPSing.

"I HEARD YOU APOLLO! STOP CAPSING! WE'RE NOT HAVING A CAPSING CONTEST! THERE IS NO NEED FOR CAPS IN THIS HOUSE! YOU SHOULDN'T BE CAPSING HERE! CAPSING IS SO OUT OF FASHION!" She paused to take a breath. "DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT CAPSING NOW, APOLLO?"

"Umm… Yeah? Why are you CAPSing? That's like so 27 seconds ago." Apollo answered.

Nemesis face palmed…

So Apollo told her his situation and she half-stated,

"I can see…"

"Oh, I love that game!" Apollo jumped. "Is it blue? Or is it yellow? Is it round like a halo?"

Nemesis sat up and grinned like he had done something she had been waiting for the past eternity. Suddenly a crowd appeared and started clapping and out of nowhere a stage materialized, audience and one of those screens, which show: Applause.

"Congratulations, Apollo of Olympus, son of Lethe and Zeus, brother of Artemis, you just succeeded in rhyming something… kind of normally… Oh, who am I kidding, it was lame, but I have to get rid of you!" She hesitated and started looking for something in her pockets. "And you get a prize! Almost reached it… C'mon… Yes! I got it! You get a paper clip!"

The crowd cheered as Apollo got on the newly-appeared stage and started his speech,

"Thank you, thank you so much! I've been working so hard for this award and now that I finally got it I want to thank-"

But he didn't get to finish, because Nemesis cut him off,

"Ok, time's up! Thank you Apollo! Applause, please."

People cheered once again as they pushed a very confused Apollo off stage and to the door. The last thing he saw was Nemesis calling the next contestant,

"Our next victim, uh, I mean contestant, is Hermes!" Nemesis made a surprised, but not less confused than Apollo, Hermes appear on the stage.

Apollo was finally pushed out the door. He wanted to watch Hermes' performance, but the door was locked, so he shrugged and started walking towards his temple… But he got tired and called his BMW Sunrise and drove to his temple.

So, this is the first chappy and I'm going to update soon(If someone's actually interrested in this story anyway), I promice! R&R Thanx!