I'VE JUST LAID MY EYES ON THE BEST MOVIE EVER. It may be a spin-off, but it's DAMN BLOODY GOOD. L:CHANGE THE WORLD rocks to the top of the sky, through the ozone layer and all the way to the once-planet-but-now-forgotten Pluto! XD

Anyway, this came from some wacky inspiration from the movie, like hey, L would meet Raito in heaven when he dies right? So have you ever wondered what would happen?

Note: I don't own Death Note... if I did, L would have died from sugar overdose or something...

The first thing L. Lawliet felt was the cold, smooth floor beneath him.Funny, I was supposed to be in my bed... He cracked one eye open and was momentarily blinded by a piercing white light. Oh, right. I was supposed to die in my sleep.Reluctantly, L sat up and squinted groggily at his surroundings. Being the anal, retarded and eccentric detective he was, L's first reaction was to start wondering where his breakfast was while stuck in a foreign place.

"Hello Ryuuzaki, I didn't expect you to come here anytime soon." A soft, oddly polite voice crooned behind a rather hungry L. He spun around, half expecting to meet some giant, walking, sugar-covered donut but Raito's conceited expression came into view instead. "Yagami-kun? So this white void really is heaven..." Not too late L, good job on realizing where you are at least.

"Keh! Did death screw up your instincts or what?" Raito sneered at the hunched detective, honorifics forgotten. "Of course this isn't heaven! Haven't you noticed why this place is empty except for the two of us?"

"Good point... but doesn't that mean this is..."

"The Void. The Emptiness all users of the Death Note are destined to fall into." Raito completed L's sentence in a bored voice. L stood stunned, contemplating and digesting what he just heard. All sorts of rubbish ran through his retarded mind, but three points caught his attention: 1)He was going to spend all of eternity with Raito-kun 2)He had really died 3)VOID NO SWEETS!!!

L almost fainted at the last point but thankfully, Raito caught him before he could fall flat on his face and disfigure himself. "Yagami-kun! I think I'm going to pass out from lack of glucose!" L gasped in sheer horror.

"Chill. Believe me you ate enough glucose while you are alive to last for all of eternity," Raito rolled his eyes at the older man. "And since there's only the two of us here, just do away with all the bloody honorifics! We were lovers back then weren't we?" L froze on the spot, suddenly recognizing the weird feeling which had been tugging at the back of his mind for quite some time. He smiled crookedly, glad that he remembered at last. Raito, on the other hand, looked thunderous. "You forgot, didn't you?"

L's sweat dropped as he tried to amend the lost situation. Raito was the 'uke' after all, so some part of him must have inherited his mother's feminine ways. Not to mention a huge quantity of jealousy which came with it.

"L. Lawliet you freaking bastard! How can you forget after 'seme-ing' me so many bloody times! I could hardly walk after all that and here you are, telling me you forgot!"

"But I had a lot of things on my mind! All those cases to solve within 23 days..."

"Like I care about your cases! It was your own fault for writing your own name on the Death Note! And you could have written it next to my name, dammit! Whatever happened to romance?!"

"But, love-"

"Don't call me love. You killed me, remember? I could've castrated you for that."

"As you wish, sweetheart. But if I hadn't done that it would have been very obvious that we are having an affair!"

"But still, you could've killed me the way you killed yourself instead of giving me a heart attack and making the last moments of my life hell!!"

"Wait, how did you know I died in my sleep due to the Death Note?"

At this, Raito smirked triumphantly. "Obviously, I kept myself updated even in death." L squirmed uncomfortably under Raito's glare, clearly guilty of all the charges put against him. "So before I proceed to strangle you," Raito continued in a sinisterly polite tone, "Who was the girl in the red dress whom you so POINTEDLY HUGGED INFRONT OF A WHOLE PLANE FULL OF PEOPLE?!"

L could feel his eyes spin out of control. Wow, I can even see stars...

Raito grabbed L's collar and hissed in his face,"You even ate the food she cooked."

"It was food after all..."

"Decide now! Who's prettier? Me or that slut?!"

"Love, you know you will always be the prettiest..."

"Keh, like I'd believe that." Raito sneered as he let go of L, who crashed onto the floor unceremoniously. "Since you dared to lay your filthy panda eyes on another while I'm gone, you are so going to be 'uke' for the rest of eternity."

L's eyeballs grew to the size of dinner plates, which looked weirdly inhuman since he had abnormally large eyes to begin with. "But love, it hurts..." L whined pitifully, "The skin around it will tear with all that 'uke-ing' "

"You had bloody 'seme-ed' me for the better half of my life so don't you go yakking about pain!"

"Love, we had 'external factors' back then. There isn't even water here for us to use..."

"Then you just have to bear with it."

"Don't be so heartless!"

"Love, if I wasn't heartless would I have tried to murder anyone in the first place?" Raito crossed his arms, fuming at the hopeless detective. "And you deserve it for stealing most of my fans with your irresistible scenes in the movie. So there."

"...I was irresistible?"

"Yeah, with all that nannying and what not. You looked so damn bloody 'uke' that I was so freaking tempted to break out of the Void just to screw you in front of everyone."

A furious blush colored L's usually pale cheeks. "And I'm kind of wishing you did... Life was much easier having you around to help me with the keyboard..." Raito blushed slightly at his words, "So I'm just a typewriter to you?" L stared at him sideways. "Nah, you're my personal 'uke' vessel"

"Love, don't even think about 'seme-ing' me ever again. Now off with the pants!" Raito practically jumped onto L and pinned him down, well-trained hands undoing L's jeans before L could even react...

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L awoke with a start, forehead breaking out in cold sweat as he gasped for air. He sighed with relief as he realized that he's still on his own bed at home, even though he was going to die anytime now. L glanced at the clock, which glowed ominously in the dark. 11:57pm... 3 more minutes?!The velvet voice of Raito still echoed in his ears as his imagination ran amok with his nightmare.

NOOO!! HE SO DID NOT WANTTO DIE YET!!!

-Sigh- Screwed it again... Bashing myself for it now... R&R please...