Warmth – By Melskim
09/11/09
Disclaimer – I do not own Xena. This is for entertainment only.
A/N : Just a little vignette set after Hope kills Solan.
The cold wind is hitting my face, I can't feel it. I'm numb to any outside sensation, but the cold I do feel is inside me. Ripping my heart, crushing it into pieces, destroying it. Here, atop the highest mountian, between snow and rain; I sing the song of the beloved dead. More like a song, it seems like the sound of a moaning animal, waiting his death.
The wind is making my hair play forms in the night, making it hit my face. I want to be hit.
He is here, he is part of the cold I'm feeling. He is too far away to be warm. I want him to be warm. The second my mind conjures the thought, he is there offering that warmth. Placing his arms around my waist and pulling me into him. I reverence the feeling. It's the first time I let myself feel, somthing so completely. His heat, his beating heart against my back, his delicious smell, his hot breathing in my neck, how hard his chest and arms are. Right now I don't care if he is the enemy or if he is here to kill me or love me. He is here and I need him.
I lean into his chest, melting in his arms. He brushes aside my revel hair and whispers in my ear that everything will be fine. I shake my head and sobs escape my lips. For the first time in days I'm not alone in my grief.
He says something after a while. I look sharply up to him. My son is dead you heartless bastard! I shout, hatred filling each single word... he is used to it. So, he just pulls me into his arms again. I start trashing away, hitting hard, bitting his neck, wanting to make him feel pain... like I am... wanting to be release. He held my ground and I give up to the warmth of his strong arms. Everything will be fine, his smooth deep voice repeats and in that moment I believe him.