Hey, People!
So this is my first english Glee-Story ever! It took me long to write this and I really hope you all like it.
The song 'Girl at Home' by Taylor Swift inspired me to write this.
Anyway, give me feedback! (:
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Glee and it's characters. They belong to RIB and FOX. The song 'Girl at Home' belongs to Taylor Swift.
Oneshot
Most people knowing him considered Finn Hudson just to be stupid. They probably thought he fell on his head when he was a child or he just missed first to third grade of school.
His problem however, was less him being stupid, but more so him being narcissistic.
What people thought was stupidity and dumbness, was just Finn Hudson being in love with himself.
Quinn Fabray, his ex-girlfriend, was happy to say that she was completely over him and his narcissism. She also pitied his current girlfriend, Rachel, for having to put up with him.
The thing about her and Rachel was a particular strange one.
Where she should hate Rachel for so many reasons, stealing her boyfriend being just one of them, she couldn't help but admire the tiny brunette.
It was not that she hadn't tried hating the girl, she did, several times actually, but every time she tried, she only ended up hating herself.
Back in sophomore year, when Quinn was still with Finn, not pregnant and just busy putting up her 'perfect-little-head-cheerleader'-facade, she did everything she could to torment Rachel, to make her feel ugly, unloved and unwanted. She made her feel smaller than she already was.
If you asked the blonde why she did it, she'd have a hard time answering right now. It was only two years back, but to her it felt like it was deep down in the past.
Quinn Fabray changed. To herself, she was still the same person. The person who hated herself for every picture of Rachel she scribbled on the tiles in the girls bathroom, the person who hated herself for every slushy she ordered to be thrown in the brunettes face, she had always been the person who hated herself for every insult, every nickname she'd spit at Rachel.
Every time she did one of those things she wanted to run after Rachel and apologize, wanted to show her, that she did care, even though everyone believed she didn't and she just hated herself even more, because she couldn't do it.
Being pregnant came as a rescue to her. A rescue from herself. She could finally drop her act and be herself. Of course it took a long time for that to happen, she'd hidden so long behind that mask that it was hard for her to let her true feelings out and to act on them. Slowly she came out of her shell and realized that life was a lot more enjoyable when you're not hiding behind lies and reputations.
She started being more carefree and loose, she quit the cheerios, she started wearing the clothes she wanted to wear, she started bringing all the fantasy books, that she had secretly hidden under her bed before, to school and to read them there. She laughed more and she talked to people. She also found her own family with glee club. She didn't need her parents approval anymore, she had now other people who cared about her and she didn't dare to think about letting that go again.
Quinn Fabray changed. She became herself.
There's one thing she didn't act on though and that thing was love. It was not that she didn't want to love or be loved it was more that she never thought she could be with the one she loved. Even if there was a possibility of them feeling the same, she would never tell them. Because the person she loved was Rachel Berry.
Yes, she was totally in love with Finn Hudson's girlfriend, the girl whom she had tortured through sophomore year; the girl whom she made suffer because of her own insecurities.
She shouldn't love her, but she did anyway.
She couldn't help it. Rachel was wonderful. She was beautiful, kind and she was talented, she had probably more talent than all the students of WMHS combined. But most of all, Rachel cared. She cared about Quinn even though the blonde had behaved nothing but awful towards her. She forgave her the moment the words 'I'm sorry' were out of her mouth.
She remembered that day like it was yesterday...
…
"Hey, Berry." Quinn said, walking into the choir room during lunch period.
"Quinn, I know we are not friends and you don't exactly like me, but I would greatly appreciate it , if you would call me by my first name since I think I think it is incredibly rude to address familiar people with nothing but their surname."
Quinn couldn't help but smile at that little rant. That was another thing she loved about the brunette.
"I'm sorry.", she said, "Hello, Rachel."
Now Rachel gave her that bright smile of hers and asked: "So, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit? Can I help you with something?"
Again the blonde couldn't stop herself from chuckling silently.
"Actually, I'm here to talk, Rachel. And just listening to me would already be a great help."
"Great, I'm all ears.", Rachel smiled.
Taking a deep, shaking breath, Quinn thought about how to begin.
"Look.", she started, "I'm here to apologize. For everything. The way I treated you over the past time, that was neither right or fair to you. You didn't deserve any of the crap I gave you and I'm sorry. I guess I was just jealous. Not only of your talent, but of the way stand up and hold your head high right after someone shot you right into the chest. You don't let anyone bring you down, you go you way no matter how many people, how many things are trying to stop you. I guess I envied that. I know that#s not an excuse and it's a lame explanation, but It's all I've got. I really am sorry and if you let me, then I 'll do everything I can to make it up to you, Rachel. I don't even deserve your forgiveness. I want it. I want it more than anything, but I don't deserve it."
Not until she ended her speech did she realize, that she was staring intensely into the brunettes eyes.
"I forgive you.", Rachel whispered.
"W-what!?" Quinn stuttered surprised.
"You meant what you just said, right?", the smaller girl asked.
"Of course. I mean it, Rachel."
"Then I forgive you. You don't need to make some grand gestures to show me you're sorry. You saying it and absolutely meaning it is enough, Quinn."
The blonde was happy beyond words, she had been so sure she'd have to work hard to earn the little diva's forgiveness and yet all she had to do was being honest.
"There is one thing I really want to ask you.", she said, not wanting to push her luck.
"What is it?", Rachel wanted to know curiously.
"Well..I was wondering if we could maybe...be friends one day?"
"Oh Quinn, that's all I wanted from you the whole time!"
The brunette squealed excitedly and flung herself into Quinn's arms.'Wow', the blonde thought, 'She really is full of surprises.' And those surprises were nothing but positive...
….They were friends from that day on. That's why Quinn loved Rachel. Rachel was forgiving and caring and the most wonderful friend one could have.
The days of her trying to ruin Rachel's life were over. She'd never even think about doing that again.
Which is also why she could never tell her she loved her.
Rachel was happy with Finn. He was a douchebag, but still, she was in love with him. Quinn knew telling Rachel how she felt would ruin that. It would ruin everything and that's why she kept quiet. She thought that if, some day, through some weird, mysterious reason, Rachel would happen to love her back, then she wouldn't hesitate to stand to her feelings, but to do that she needed to be 100% sure, that Rachel felt the same way.
And she didn't do that right now and the blonde doubted she would ever.
As much as she wanted Rachel to love her back, she wouldn't want to lose the friendship they had, so she just supported Rachel in all her decisions and in her relationship with Finn, even though she really couldn't stand the guy, but for Rachel, she would at least try and be civil to him.
She even managed to do that for longer than she thought. It made her sick seeing Rachel with him and she guessed she'd just snap one day.
But she worked on herself and managed to be a good friend to Rachel and not to punch Finn in the face every time she saw him or heard him say one of his stupid, unnecessary comments.
Today though, today was the day she'd snap today was the day where she finally stopped just sitting by and watching the love of her life be with some prick who didn't deserve her.
The funny thing was, she didn't even expect things to go as they went today, she thought today'd be just another day of her being unhappy in love, but things were different.
It started shortly after second period when Finn walked over to her.
"Hey, Quinn." he said and gave her smile, which he probably thought was charming.
"Hello, Frankent- uhm Finn." the blonde corrected herself hastily.
"What do you want?", she gritted out.
"I was wondering, if you're free tonight."
Okay, now she was confused. Did Finn want to meet her. If yes, then why?
"Free for what?"
"Well, I thought you'd be lonely, because you had no boyfriend since I dumped you at the funeral and maybe we could meet up tonight and I could, you know, do something about it, if you understand what I mean." He raised his eyebrows suggestively, which looked just dump to Quinn.
She couldn't believe what she was hearing. That guy was so full of himself it was nearly impossible.
"Are you implying what I think you are implying? Because if you are, well first of all that's absolutely no way to ask, and second of all, what the hell are you thinking? You're with Rachel!"
She tried hard not to yell at him right now, because she didn't want to draw the attention of the whole hallway to them.
"See, that's the thing.", Finn sighed, "Rachel is such a prude. She doesn't even let me grab her ass."
The not-yelling? Well that was over now.
"SERIOUSLY, Finn? I can't believe you! You have the most wonderful girl by your side and here you are, asking another girl to sleep with you, because Rachel's not ready! Do you have ANY respect for your girl?"
"C'mon, Quinn. Don't be like that. A man has needs. And I am sure you do to."
Now she was afraid of slapping him any second, who did this guy think he is?
"Wow, I knew you were a douche, but this? Unbelievable. You call yourself a man? You are no man, you're a pathetic little- god I can't even describe it!"
"You're totally overreacting."
"OVERREACTING? I'm not overreacting!", she hissed, "But I am so going to kick your whiny little ass if you ever think about cheating on Rachel again. What kind of man are you if you can't give girl a little time?!"
"A little time? Quinn, I've waited for months, do you have any idea how hard that is? She even has a problem with me watching porn."
She scoffed. "Oh yeah, you're such a poor soul, Finn."
"She invited my to her house on Friday. To make vegan muffins! I don't even eat vegan muffins!"
"Damn, Hudson, go to her house and make those damn muffins with her! Your first priority should be making her happy! So go, and make her happy, because if you don't, if I ever see you suggesting sexual actions to other girls again, then I'm going to tell her. Rachel doesn't deserve this and you don't deserve her! Keep that in mind."
She gave him one last glare before she stalked off to her next class.
She still couldn't believe the conversation she just had. She never thought anyone could love themselves that much, but obviously Finn Hudson could.
She really should tell Rachel what just happened, but something was keeping her from doing it.
She knew the brunette was happy with Finn, and if she told Rachel, then their relationship would fall apart and the diva would be devastated. Quinn didn't want that. She wanted the girl she loved to be happy, and she obviously was. With Finn. The blonde grimaced at the thought.
She hoped that Finn would take to heart what she just told him and that he wouldn't go after any more girls, because if he did, then Quinn would have to do something she didn't really want to. Or actually she did.
Through the following classes she couldn't keep her mind off the conversation she just had. She didn't really trust Finn and she feared he'd just look for the next girl he could ask for this particular 'favor'.
Rachel really didn't deserve something like this. She deserved so much better. Someone who would worship her every second of every day. Someone who understood her, who would calm her fears, who listen to her talking about her dreams and who would hold her when she cried. Someone who would be there for her, no matter what happened. Someone who loved her more than anything in this world and was ready to show her that.
Someone like Quinn.
Though the blonde feared, that Rachel deserved someone better than her, someone perfect, someone who never tormented her for whatever reasons.
But Quinn also was sure, that she could give Rachel everything she needed, to fulfill her every wish. She'd do all that, if she ever got the chance to, which she doubted.
But still, a girl can hope.
When lunchtime came, she was on her way to the choir room, where she was about to spend her break with Rachel.
Finn never did that. To him it was more important to sit on the table with the other football jocks and make fun of other people, just so he could feel popular. The fact that his girlfriend didn't feel comfortable with those guys and therefore spent her lunch in the choir room didn't concern him. As long as he had his fun.
She had almost reached the choir room when thought crept up on her.: Finn knew, she always spent lunch with Rachel. Who knew what he was doing when he was in the cafeteria and knew, that Quinn wouldn't be nearby?
With that thought she turned and headed for the cafeteria. She wasn't surprised in the least at what she saw there.
Finn was talking animatedly to that redheaded cheerleader, Samantha was her name.
Quinn remembered her from the squad, she was a spoiled little brat who thought the world was made, just for her. She was kinda like the blonde herself, back in sophomore year.
She narrowed her eyes at the talking couple.
The tall boy's hand was caressing the cheerleader's arm and he was giving her a smile. The exact same smile he gave Quinn a few hours ago.
Of course he didn't listen to her. She should have known he wasn't trustworthy.
Calm down, Q!, she told herself, They're probably just talking.
But she knew that wasn't the case and this time she wouldn't let him get away with this...
Later, in Glee, she sat down next to Rachel.
"I missed you at lunch. Where were you?" The brunette asked, a little annoyed that Quinn just hadn't shown up.
"I'm sorry, Rach. There was just something I hat to do."
"What was it?", Rachel asked, whose curiosity had just been awoken.
"Tell you later, promise.", Quinn smiled, just when Finn stumbled into the room.
His hair was messed up, his face was flush, his cheeks were red and he was a little out of breath.
One look at him was enough for the ex-cheerleader to know exactly what he had been doing.
"That's it!", she hissed, before she raised her hand: "Mister Schue, I have a song I want to sing."
Mr. Schuester's eyes lit up when he heard that someone other than Rachel wanted to sing first.
"Of course", he smiled, "The floor is all yours."
She looked over at Rachel who gave her a confused look and whispered to her: "Just wait and see."
With that she stood up and walked over to Brad, the piano guy to tell him her song choice.
Brad started playing and Quinn looked down at her shoes while she sang the first words. She still felt bad doing this. But she knew it would be wrong not to.
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that,
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that.
I just wanna make sure,
You understand perfectly,
You're the kind of man who makes me sad,
With those words she raised her head and looked directly at Rachel's boyfriend, who scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion.
While she waits up,
You chase down the newest thing,
And take for granted what you have.
Now she looked over at Rachel with a sad expression on her face.
And it would be a fine preposition,
If I was a stupid girl,
And yeah I might go with it,
If I hadn't once been just like her.Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that,
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that,
I see you turn off your phone,
And now you've got me alone,
And I say,
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that.
She now made her way up to where Finn sat, grabbed him by his shirt and sang the next verse loudly into his face.
Call a cab,
Lose my number,
You're about to lose your girl,
Call a cab,
Lose my number,
Let's consider this lesson learned.
"I hope you learn it now.", she hissed into his ear.
She pushed him back into his seat and walked back down, while she glanced worriedly at Rachel. The brunette slowly seemed to understand what was happening and what the song was about.Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that,
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that,
Wanna see you pick up your phone,
And tell her you're coming home,
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that,
Don't look at me,
You've got a girl at home,
And everybody knows that,
Everybody knows that.
Hurt started to creep it's way to Rachel's face, who slowly turned her head to Finn, not believing he did what Quinn had just implied.It would be a fine proposition,
If I hadn't once been just like her.
The blonde ex-cheerleader finished her song and walked slowly back to her seat, ignoring the applause that came from the other Glee-members.
She watched with a bit of regret, when Rachel asked Finn, voice shaking: "Is it true? What Quinn just sang, is it true. Did you cheat on me, Finn?"
His face got even redder than it was before and he didn't need to say anything for the brunette to know the answer.
"Rach, I- look it isn't like that, Quinn just-"
"This isn't about Quinn! Just tell me, is it true or not?"
"Look, I'm sorry Rachel, but you need to understand, you didn't let me do anything. Just kissing isn't satisfying."
With that, Rachel's eyes filled with tears. She couldn't believe her boyfriend was so insensible.
"Not satisfying! You could have waited. If you'd love, you would have waited. I can't believe you, Finn. You know what? It is over! I know I am not the perfect girlfriend, but I don't deserve that. That is not, what a relationship is about, Finn."
He continued looking confused for a few seconds longer, till the realization dawned on him.
"No!", he almost yelled, desperately and took her hand., "You can't do that, Rachel!"
She shook his big, sweaty hands away and said: "I believe I just did."
Now he huffed angrily and turned towards Quinn, who had been watching the scene quietly.
"This is all your fault!" He spat. "I never thought you'd be such a cruel, coldhearted bitch. You're no better than your father."
With that her hand connected with his face with a loud smack.
"You better watch your tongue, Hudson!" She hissed. "What you did to Rachel is unforgivable and only one in this room that is cruel and coldhearted, is you! Did you really think I would've sat back and watched how you abused Rachel's trust and destroyed her. No, she means too much to me! You are not worth her time, nor are worth being in the same room with her, so I suggest you leave."
He huffed one last time, before he turned around and stormed out of the room, kicking a chair on his way.
Quinn slowly sat down next to Rachel and gently took her hand.
"Look, Rach. I'm sorry.", she said. "I know you probably hate me right now, for destroying your relationship, but I just- I just couldn't watch this. I'm so sorry."
The brunette looked up to friend and shook her head.
"You have nothing to be sorry for, Quinn. If it weren't for you, I would have given my virginity to someone who isn't worth it this weekend. I wanted to surprise him, you know. I am not ready, but I know it would have made him happy."
Her face was tear-stained and the words were sniffled.
Quinn gave her a small smile.
"I'm glad you didn't do that. You should wait for the right person."
"You are completely right. But you know, I believe I have found the right person."
Okay, I'm going to leave it here, tell me what you think. (:
-BlackCorn-