Heyyyyyy, I'm baaaack! Hehe... Well, like I said, if it got popular enough, I'd make a sequel... so here it is! Yay! :D Oh, and if you haven't read Dragon Ball Reacts to Fanfics, you NEED to go check it out. I mean, you don't have to but if you plan on reading this, then reading that first will make tons of more sense. But obviously you know that! I'm sure you're smart! ...Why do I keep talking?
ANYWAY, here's the sequel and like the first, I don't think it's going to be any longer and three chapters.
Okay, well, this contains some language (nothing more than a PG movie would have), more Yaumcha bashing, and, of course... VEGETA IN A PINK DRESS! Random Guy: No... that was Part One! Me: Oh... :( Dang it... But there will still be some crazy crap in here...
Disclaimer: If I owned Dragon Ball or it's affiliates... Well... Dragon Ball GT wouldn't have happened... All I own in this is the plot.
Anyway, voila! :3
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Somewhere deep in the remote mountains of the Himalayas, in a deep underground bunker, a man sat at a desk, staring at one of those plastic birds that dip their beaks into a water cup.
The man stared at it intently, eyes bloodshot and watery, almost like he was in a deep trance.
Suddenly, the door behind him burst open, letting light into the pitch dark room. The guy staring at the plastic bird that dips its beak into the water cup turned towards the open door and hissed like a vampire, bearing his teeth and showing his Wet 'N Wild Posh Pink® nails sharpened to points.
"Whoa, whoa!" the person who slammed the door open shouted. "It's just me, Yamucha! Calm down!"
The hissing, pink-nailed vampire that is Yamucha stopped flouncing his claws at the other man and wiped spittle from his chin.
"...What is it you want?!" Yamucha demanded.
The man stepped into the room and turned on the light switch. Yamucha started hissing and spazzing out again.
"Oh! Oh, sorry!" the man said hurriedly before flipping the light switch back off. "Sorry, I forgot about the whole light thing!"
Yamucha only hissed.
The man, feeling sorta of creeped out by this, hesitated before saying, "Yamucha, sire, your order finally came in. It was just delivered."
Yamucha flew from his chair towards the man. "Really?! Where is it! Lemme see!"
The man backed against the wall and raised his arms. "It's out there! It's out there! Don't hurt me!" He started sobbing.
Yamucha, overwhelmed with sheer delight that "It" came, flew out of his room and into the main room of this underground bunker. Basically, the whole underground bunker was an old radioactive mine shaft, but when Yamucha bought it from the realtor, they promised him it was now 32% free of radioactivity, and would sell it to him for only forty million zenni. Yamucha figured that was a pretty good bargain if there ever was one.
Anyway, he flew into the room and there he saw it – the brown cardboard box sitting on a table. Yamucha flew to the table and, since he wouldn't be able to walk for another thirteen point five years, hovered slightly above the ground.
"M-my precious," he rasped, picking the box up off the table and stroking it. He brought it to his cheek and nuzzled the box. "You're all mine now, all mine..."
Then he whipped out his Swiss Army Knife and sliced the thing open. He dug in through the packing peanuts, making sure to save them so he could play with them later, and pulled the object of his attention out – a glistening new laptop.
Yamucha looked at it in pure awe, twinkles in his eyes. A girlish giggle leaped from his throat. "Ohmigosh... it's beautiful!" he said, biting his lower lip. "I-it's magnificent!"
He proceeded to hug the laptop to his chest and then turned towards a cardboard cutout which stood just outside the door, staring blankly at Yamucha. The cardboard cutout was actually a crudely drawn Ghost Nappa, made by Yamucha himself.
You see, after Ghost Nappa was tragically lost as a sunscreen lotion applier, Yamucha couldn't bear to live without his annoying companion. So Yamucha drew a Ghost Nappa to the best of his ability and viola! Yamucha and Nappa togetha foreva!
"So what do you think, Cardboard Cutout Ghost Nappa?" Yamucha asked, showing him the new laptop. "Don't you think this is absolutely lovely?"
Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa stared back blankly.
"Yes, yes, I know how you feel," Yamucha said, beaming. "But don't worry. I will avenge both you and my dignity. I don't care if people say I didn't have any to begin with, but I will get it back somehow! And this little baby will do just that."
Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa stared back blankly.
"All I have to do now is boot this baby up and then the world will be mine!" Yamucha yelled. "And those four dingbats will RUE the day they decided to mess with Yamucha and his fanfictions! Just you wait! JUST YOU WAIT! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"
Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa stared back blankly.
After Yamucha's maniac laughing finally wore off he narrowed his eyes. "Assistant man!" he shouted out, and instantly the man from before came trembling into the room.
"Yes, sir?" he asked nervously.
"Did you send out all of the invites yet?" Yamucha asked. The man nodded shakily.
"Yes, sir, I did, sir," the man stuttered. "They were sent out this morning."
"Great!" Yamucha said and hopped up and down. The man sighed in relief that Yamucha hadn't gone vampire like before and exited the room.
Yamucha looked at Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa. "So, Ghost Nappa, the time has finally come for us to have our sweet revenge. In only a couple hours, justice will be served! But first – " Yamucha lied his computer on the table " – I need to go into town. I'm all our of my favorite nail polish and I need to go buy some more. Let's go Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa!"
Yamucha picked up Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa and promptly flew out the trapdoor on the roof and into the chilly Himalaya air above.
Somewhere in the house, the assistant huddled in a corner sobbing to himself, wondering what heinous crime he committed to wind up being Yamucha's assistant.
Vegeta was panting hard, chest rising and falling rapidly. Sweat dripped from his brow as he struggled to say, "K-Kakarot... H-hhury!"
Goku, who was on top of him, blinked back dizzying pain and managed to to say, "Hold on, I'm almost there!"
Vegeta moaned and clenched his eyes shut. "I can't take it any longer!"
Goku bit his lip and struggled to spread his legs further. It was getting hard for him... Any moment he could blow it...
"KAKAROT!" Vegeta groaned loudly, throwing his head back. "AHHNNNHHHH!"
"There!" Goku burst, slamming his hand down on a blue poly-spot. "I did it!" The young Saiyan warrior beamed proudly as he steadied himself in a rather uncomfortable position on the Twister mat. Vegeta, who was twisted below him, was having a hard time staying up himself, since both his arms were crossed under himself and on different sides of the mat. "Your turn Vegeta!"
"Whoo hooo!" Chi-Chi cheered from where she sat on a pillow eating popcorn, watching the Twister match. She was wearing a cheerleading outfit. "Go Goku!"
Bulma, who was dressed in her own cheerleading outfit, glared at Chi-Chi and then turned to Vegeta. "Go Vegeta! C'mon, beat Goku!"
Chi-Chi wrinkled her nose at Bulma. "Goku could beat Vegeta any day!"
"Yeah right," Bulma defended, crossing her arms. "Vegeta is a prince, so he's obviously number one!"
"Oh yeah?! Goku's stronger than Vegeta is!" Chi-Chi countered. "And he's gunna whoop Vegeta's arse!"
Both wives began their own match of a glaring contest.
Meanwhile, Vegeta was having a hard time trying to move his left arm to a yellow dot. It was by far his hardest move yet, and there was a high chance he could fall over while trying to navigate himself there. However, there was a mint edition of Super Mario NES Europa Print VGA Q 85 Gold Highest Grade laying on this game, he knew he had to beat Goku at all costs. (A/N: That video game sells for $1,986 on eBay, did you know that?! Holy crap!)
And he was just about to get his hand onto that yellow dot – and possibly win – if it weren't for at that moment, Ghost Nappa came barging into the room wearing a maid apron, holding a feather duster, and belting 'I Can Show You the World' at the top of his gritty voice.
"Argh!" Goku cried as he jolted in surprise, falling on top of Vegeta who also shouted in surprise. "Noooooooo!"
"IIIII can shooow you the worrrrrld!" Ghost Nappa sang, dancing around the room. "Shining, shimmering, splendid! Tell me, Prince Vegeta, now when did you last let your heart deciiiiide?! IIIIII can opeeen your eyes! Take you wonnndeerrr by wooonderr! Over siiidewaaays, and underrr, on a – "
"DAMMIT, NAPPA!" Vegeta growled while getting squished under Goku. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
Nappa stopped singing. "Whoops, sorry 'Geta. Did I disturb you?"
Bulma stood up and crossed her arms at Ghost Nappa. "Nappa, what did I say about coming into our house? You aren't allowed in here! Why aren't you tending to Master Roshi like a good sunscreen lotion applier? Bad Nappa!"
Ghost Nappa bowed his bald head. "Soooeeeeey, Mrs. Briefs. It's just that I finished with Roshi already."
"That's no excuse!" Vegeta blurted, squirming out from under Goku. "Do you know what you've just done? YOU COST ME THE ULTRA RARE DIAMOND MINT EDITION OF SUPER MARIO BROS NES EUROPA PRINT!"
"Sorry Vegeta!" Nappa rasped. "It was an accident! I just reeeeally like that song."
Bulma cleared her throat. "Um, Nappa, why are you dressed like that?"
Ghost Nappa looked down at his outfit. "Oh, this?" He smiled. "Well, you see, since I was all finished with Roshi, I took it upon myself to become your guys' maid! I've been doing all the daily chores like laundry, dishes... Man, Vegeta, I do have to say your room was a mess, but don't worry – I cleaned it right up. I even organized all your Playboy magazines by alphabetical order!"
Bulma crossed her arms and looked over at Vegeta. "Um, what?"
Vegeta gritted his teeth. "Nothing, woman. This man is obviously delusional. I don't have any of those magazines."
"Sure you do," Ghost Nappa insisted. "I can go up and get them right now if you wanna look at them."
"NAPPA!" Vegeta shouted. "SHUT IT!"
Bulma crossed her arms at Vegeta and pursed her lips. "So, is that true?"
"..." Vegeta looked between Bulma and Ghost Nappa and back again. "Nappa! What did you come in here to tell us in the first place?!"
"Oh!" Nappa suddenly perked up. "I got the mail for you guys. There's a letter for you!" Ghost Nappa handed a pink envelope addressed The Briefs to Bulma. She took it.
"Now, off and I away I go!" Ghost Nappa cheered and danced out of the room, singing 'Unda Da Sea.'
"Who's it from?" Chi-Chi asked nervously, biting her lip, trying to look at the letter. "...Because I kinda accidentally sent you guys some pictures I meant to send in to the Hot Momma's Calender Photoshoot..."
Everybody looked at her weirdly.
"What?!" she demanded. "I just thought... y'know I could get my picture in the calender is all... Ahem, ANYWHOO, who's it really from?"
"I don't know," Bulma replied. "It doesn't say..." Immediately she tore it open and gazed upon the paper. She read it aloud: "'Dear Brief family, are you readay to boooogay? Well, you and all your friends are invited to'... um..." She squinted to see the handwriting. "Um, I'm not really sure what it says, but it looks like it says 'Yam*scribblescribble* Krillin's party.'"
"Who's Yamkrillin?" Goku asked stupidly.
"You idiot, it says Krillin!" Chi-Chi snapped.
Goku's face wrinkled. "Well, that's a funny way to spell Krillin."
Chi-Chi sighed and rolled her eyes. "See, this is why I made Gohan study so hard – so he didn't end up like you!"
"End up like who?" Goku asked, looking around the room. "Who are we talking about again?"
Chi-Chi face-palmed.
"Anyway," Bulma continued, "the letter says, 'Come to Krillin's party tonight at five p.m at the Royal Casino of Wealth and be sure to bring dem boogay shoes! Refreshments will only cost five dollars each.'" Bulma looked up at her friends. "And that's it."
"Hmph, a party, huh?" Vegeta growled in that sarcastic voice. "Well, don't get any ideas woman, but I'm not going."
"Aw, Vegeta, why not?" Goku asked, leaning on the Prince's shoulder. "It'll be fuuuuun!" Vegeta shoved him off.
"I don't know what fun is," he said flatly.
"Oh, Vegeta, that's real cold. C'mon, don't be such a prude," Goku said, crossing his arms. "Let's go to Krillin's party!"
Vegeta brushed Goku off and walked away, staring at the wall without saiyan another word. (lolol, saiyan, lololol)
"Well, I don't know," Chi-Chi began. "I like parties and all, but Krillin always throws such lame parties... Remember the last one?"
FLASHBACK
"Whoo hooo, let's party!" Krillin yelled as he hopped onto a chair and started air-guitaring. The very few people that were there (only six of them) sighed and put their chins in their hands.
"This is boring," said one of those people, who happened to be Chi-Chi. She sighed and sipped her 'alcohol' which was really only watered down lemonade. "I mean, the freaking lights are still on."
It was true. The lights were all still on in the living room of Kame House, illuminating the obviously hand-made streamers and decorations littering the walls. Everyone else in the room was seated in a chair watching Krillin grind his guitar to the music which was barely audible. They all looked bored.
Suddenly Tien walked into the room, wearing a party hat. "Yo, why do you all look so bored? C'mon, let's party!" He strolled to the stereo and cranked up the volume, which happened to be the country station. He started jamming to it like a weirdo.
"No!" Krillin shouted to Tien over the pounding, deafening music. "You're gunna upset the – "
A hole suddenly sprang from the ceiling and a figure fell down through it. Everyone screamed and gripped one another in fear. Tien kept dancing. Krillin slapped his forehead. "Too late."
"WHAT. IS. THAT. INFERNAL. NOISE," growled the notorious Android 18, face pinched in anger. (But don't worry, she was slightly healed from her sociopath ways.) She looked at her husband who was busy cowering in fear of his wife's temper. "KRRRRILLLIIIIN," she growled warningly.
"Oh, um, Eighteen, heh heh," Krillin chuckled nervously. "Um, how are you doin'?"
Even without looking, she blasted a hole through the stereo, cutting off the honkey-tonk music. "I. HATE. COUNTRY."
"Um, yeah, I-I can explain," Krillin started to say but Eighteen blasted a hole in the wall near his head. He screamed.
"I. HATE. COUNTRY." she said again and started to from a Ki ball in her hands. "I HATE IT!"
"Oh no! Everybody run!" Krillin screamed, running for the front door. "She's gunna blow!"
All six party guests screamed and jumped out windows and doors, running for their lives. Behind them, Kame House blew, with a distinct angry scream of, "COUNTRY MUST DIE!"
Chi-Chi ended up in the ocean, bobbing in the waves, mascara running down her face. Goku swam next to her.
"This was by far the worst party I've ever been to," she confessed, staring at the rubble from the blown up house.
"Why? I like country!" Goku said. " I was ridin' shot gun, with my hair undone, in the front seat of his car He got a one hand-bail on the, sterin' wheel, the other on my, HEEAART! "
Chi-Chi chose to ignore that and swam away.
END OF FLASHBACK
Chi-Chi jolted, the flashback dispersing from her mind. She shuddered. "It was horrible."
Bulma nodded. "Yeah, it was pretty bad."
"But guys, I really like country, and I haven't partied in awhile and I really wanna go!" Goku whined childishly. "Please?!"
Bulma rubbed her chin. "Mmmm, I dunno..." She looked over at Vegeta who was still staring at the wall. "What do you think, 'Geta?"
"No way in hell. I'm not going," he said monotonously. Bulma turned to Goku with a huge smile.
"Then that means we're going!" she declared and folded the invite. Chi-Chi looked at her strangely.
"You see," the blue-haired female explained, "I love doing things that piss Vegeta off. It's just something I do. Y'know, a hobby. So since he doesn't wanna go, we're attending right on time!"
"YAY!" Goku cheered happily. "This is gunna be so awesome!"
Vegeta huffed and growled. "Darn it, woman, must you always do things that make me wanna blow this planet up?"
Bulma only giggled like that was funny.
Goku ran from the room, dancing to himself, while Chi-Chi followed. "Well, I have to go get ready then," she said to Bulma. "I guess I'll see you there?"
"Totally!" Bulma said and waved as the mother of two Saiyans left the room. Then she turned to Vegeta, "Now go get dressed Vegeta! You can't go in that stinky training gear."
"I personally think the smell shows off my manly side," he grumbled, but did as he was told. Bulma looked at the invite again, and couldn't help but feel a little suspicious about the YamKrillin thing. Well, Krillin was amazingly stupid and maybe he just forgot how to spell his name or something... She brushed it off like it was no biggie and went to get ready along with her husband.
xxx
"Ghost Nappa!" shouted Yamucha at his cardboard cutout bestie. "What's the status on the guests?"
Cardboard Cut-Out Ghost Nappa stared back blankly.
"What was that? They're all attending? Wonderful! Simply Marvelous!" Yamucha twiddled his fingers like creepy guys do in movies.
"Yamucha, sir!" The assistant from eailer popped through the door of the room. He threw his hand to his forehead in a salute. Yamucha dismissed him.
"What is it, Assistant Man?" he asked.
"Some of the party guests have arrived," reported Assistant Man. Yaumcha clasped his hands in front of his chest, eyes filling with anime sparkles.
"Really~? Like who? Who has arrived? Is it those I wish to punish with my sick revenge~?"
Assistant Man backed up a few steps.
"Er, no, actually it's just Dende, sir," said he.
"Dende?!" Yaumcha roared. "B-but, I didn't even invite him!"
"Oh, and Mr. Popo, too, sir," Assistant Man went on. "They brought some, er, casserole, because they thought this was a potluck."
Yamucha's anger dispersed. "Casserole?! Ooh, let me have some, I want some!" He ran out of the room.
"Wait, Yamucha, sir, it's not really casserole!" Assistant Man called after him but Yamucha was long gone.
He flew out of his hotel room at the Royal Casino of Wealth and into the lobby where the party was being held. There stood Mr. Popo holding a pan of "casserole" and Dende stood next to him.
"Gimme that casserole!" screamed Yamucha and he ripped it from the black blob's hand. (Like, seriously, I don't even know was Mr. Popo is supposed to be. Some alien thing? Gawd, I have no idea.)
Yaumcha tore off the foil and stuck his hand into it and started eating it. Just then Assistant Man ran down the staircase as Yamucha inhaled the "casserole." By now, you probably know the "casserole" isn't really casserole. It was...
"Yamucha, sir," began Assistant Man, "er, that's pot."
"WTF?!" screamed Yamucha as he spit out the not-casserole. He dropped the pan as Mr. Popo started laughing manically.
"Hahaha! HAHAHAHA! Pot, you fool! POT! HAHAHAHAHA! I GREW IT AND NOW YOU HAVE IT! HAHAHAHA!" Mr. Popo continued to laugh that pants-pissing, nightmare-inducing laughter. Everybody shivers at that laughter. Even I shiver as I write this...
"G-get that creep outta here," Yaumcha said, still choking on the "casserole". "He's forbidden to go near me! Get him out!"
Assistant Man grabbed Mr. Popo by his vest and hauled him to the sliding doors of the lobby. "C'mon, sir, you must leave now."
Mr. Popo only laughed as he was dragged away. "You can get rid of me," he called in that accent of his that some certain T.V stations found racially innapropriate so they colored him in purple instead. "But you'll never GET RID of me! Mahahahaha! I'll get to you! I will! In a certain place you call your dreams! I'm coming for you! Tonight! I am! Mahahaha! MAHAHAHAHAHA-!"
He was tossed out onto the curb.
Yamucha looked at Dende. "Er, you live with that freak?"
Dende shook his head. "The horror... The horror I live through because of him!" He grasped Yamucha's shirt. "THE HORROR!"
"Assistant Man!" Yaumcha called. "Get this man out of here too!"
Assistant Man hauled Dende out of the lobby. "The horror! THE FREAKING HORROR!" he screamed as he was dragged by his feet. He was tossed onto the curb with Mr. Popo who only grinned at the Namek in that uber-creepified way...
"Phew, that gets rid of them," Yamucha said, dusting his hands. "So now no one has showed up for my party yet?!"
"Looks like it, sir," Assistant Man said. "But it is only four-thirty. The party doesn't start for another half hour."
"You're right," said Yamucha. "Besides, you don't have my disguise ready! They can't know it's me, Yamucha! They have to think I'm Krillin!"
"Oh, yeah, I forgot sir. I have the guise upstairs. Shall you go get it now?" asked Assistant Man.
"Yes," Yamucha said. "And by the time I'm done, the guests will arrive and my revenge will be found! Oh, it's so wonderful. So perfect... Yes, yes, MWAHAHAHA!" The lights flipped off and Yamucha held a flashlight to his face, while laughing creepily.
Assistant Man backed away slowly and sprinted up the stairs, fearing for his life.
"Oh yes, it'll be wonderful," Yamucha whispered to himself, all alone. He pulled his laptop out and stroked it. "Oh, yes... They will get what they deserve for rendering me unwalkifiable, undignified and for taking Nappa away! Oh, they'll pay dearly..." His mouth widened in a creepy smile. "MWHAHAHAHAH! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
He continued to laugh evilly...
