A/N Welcome to the new story, I hope you enjoy! There's a couple of things I'd like to point out - This is an AU story, Jon Snow isn't going to be born, there's lots of death, violence, mature language, descriptive smut and some not very nice things. It's a Game of Thrones fanfic. What can I say? So, if the list of things doesn't float your boat, please don't read it. However, if you don't mind it and you do read ahead, let me know what you think :) Cheers!
(If your curious) The Rhaegar I'm portraying is the one depicted by Karla Ortiz in The World of Ice and Fire.
Feeling my chest heave up and down, a smile had etched itself onto my face as I pressed my back up against the garden hedge. Feeling the branches and leaves scratch along the fabric of my dress and skin, I was as silent and still as I could possibly be. The sky was clear and it was a perfect day in Kingslanding – a perfect day for a game of chase.
Listening, I could hear the others as they ran with muffled giggles – trying not to get caught. Peaking my head around the corner, I watched with a careful eye. I could see Penny just a little distance away, hiding behind another hedge. Gasping, the boy named Brendon had stepped out to take a long look around – he was the one who was supposed to catch us.
"Found you" I heard him call out after Penny let out a little scream at being caught. Scrunching a fistful of my dress I took off down the other way. Feeling my heart thump under my chest like a series of galloping horses, I quickly glanced behind me to see that Brendon had just turned the corner I was recently hiding behind.
"You're getting slow" I teased out as I giggled, my silver white hair blowing in the wind as I ran.
Not hearing a reply back, I had turned down several pathways before coming to a halt. Taking laboured breaths, I glanced around and noticed it was deathly quiet. Peaking around here and there, I went to turn around again when a pair of strong arms wrapped around me causing me to squeal "I may be slow, but I'm smart" grinned Brandon as he looked down at me with a cheeky look on his face.
A head taller than me, Brandon was two years my senior with short brown hair and chocolate coloured eyes. Charming and intelligent, I had known him for several years and over that span of time we had slowly but surely become rather close – a little too close some would say.
"Smart" I agreed with a nod of my head and a smile "But also cunning"
"And you love it" he winked "You wouldn't have me any other way" chuckling, I gave a light smack to his chest before shaking my head playfully. Always the tease. Resting my hand on his chest, I noticed that his heart was beating a tad bit faster. I thought it might have been from all the running, but as I looked up at him – a moment had clicked.
Gazing into his brown orbs, my site slowly leveled down to his lips and despite being out in the open, the air around us had suddenly turned thick. Feeling a heated blush crawl onto my cheeks, I wasn't quite sure what to think as I felt butterflies in my stomach. Hearing the sudden clicking sound of shoes along the garden pavement, I quickly detached myself as Penny rounded the corner with a smile.
"There you two are" she said with a somewhat relieved tone "I thought you might have gotten lost. Come one" she said with a nod of her head "The others are waiting"
Glancing at Brendon, I noticed the slight shift in his demeanour as his eyes were still trained on me. Linking my arm with Penny's, I tried to make it seem as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened – the last thing I needed was everyone teasing and asking questions. Following close behind, all three of us made out way over to the patch of lawn near a waterfall that had been set up with a picnic lunch; the few other girls and boys already partaking in freshly baked goods and fruit.
Finding an empty spot, I sat down in the circle we had formed; my dress skirt puffing out around me. Reaching over I grabbed a lemon cake and took a bite. Conversing with the girl beside me, Penny touched my leg to grab my attention "What's wrong?" I asked.
She leant in to whisper to me "There's something wrong with Brandon. He keeps staring at you" snapping my eyes over to man sitting across the circle. With one of his legs angled up, his arm rested on his knee as he fiddled with a blade of grass.
Brandon was indeed staring at me, and rather intently.
Swallowing the lump in the back of my throat, I turned back to Penny "It's nothing. He's probably trying to annoy me again" I said with an easy tone. I didn't want to make a big deal out of it or make it something to worry about. I'll talk to him later when there's not so many people around.
There was a pause until Penny asked "Are you sure there's nothing going on between you two?" looking at her, I gave a firm nod and decent smile.
"There's nothing going on…I promise"
Finishing the rest of lunch with small bits of conversation and food, Brendon had thankfully stopped staring after a while. Finding my way through the maze of the Royal Gardens, I was walking down a narrow hallway that looked over a court yard below when I was suddenly pulled aside by a pair of strong hands. Gasping, I went to squeal and kick at my attacker when I heard his voice "It's just me" said Brendon as my back pressed against his chest.
Whirling around in his arms, I glared up at him "I thought you were going to hurt me" pulled up against a shadowed curve in the wall, there was no one around but us. I huffed "You should be more careful at who you stare at" I said referring to earlier on today. I might as well bring it up now that were away from everyone else.
"Am I not allowed to look at a beautiful woman?" he questioned with a teasing smirk on his lips.
I looked down with a sigh "If someone were to see us like this" I gestured to our close bodies "I don't want anything to happen to you because of me" feeling a pang in my chest, I glanced up to Brendon. For the time being we've managed to keep our 'extra' time together a secret. So far it wasn't anything too physical, just a few heated kisses here and there. But still, what we're doing isn't safe. It's dangerous. After all, I am royalty and he is not.
"No one's going to catch us" he tried to reassure me as he tucked a piece of my silver hair behind my ear "No one's going to know"
I frowned "But what if they do?" I was sad just thinking about "They'd send you away and I'd never see you again, and…my birthday – it's a week from now. I'll be turning sixteen. What would we do then?" What will happen when soon after I'll be married to my brother – Rhaegar?
He gave me a series look "We'll run away together, just you and me. We'll go tomorrow night if you want" I scoffed, as if that were possible "What? We could do it. We could be happy together"
Looking into his eyes I wanted to believe him. I wanted to agree, but is that really what I want – to leave my family for him instead. I don't know if I could handle it. Not forever. As it is, it hurts to have Rhaegar gone for so long. He'd been sent by father to fight in some campaign in the South and he'd yet to return. I think his absence is the reason as to why Brendon and I had suddenly grown to be so close over the last month. Eventually though Rhaegar will return home, and I'm not sure what will happen when he does. Leaning up on my tippy toes, I pressed my lips against his. What was I to do?
I could only pray that no one would ever discover our tragic secret.
Sitting down at the dinner table, I ate the slice of beef I had cut from my plate. For the rest of the day I couldn't stop thinking about Brendon – how his hands felt on my body and how he looked at me as if I were his everything. I wish it would stay that way forever.
Staring at the empty seat in front of me, my mother had called my name "Rhaella, you seem rather happy. Did something happen?" it took me a moment to respond as I slipped from my daydream.
"I had a good day that's all. We played chase and had lunch in the garden" I replied with a smile on my lips. Looking into my mother's deep eyes, her hair was just like mine; long and silvery white. A hereditary trait of the Targaryen family. Sitting in the seat just beside me, her left hand rested on the swollen expanse of her stomach and I gleamed at the site.
A few months ago we had received news that my mother had once again fallen pregnant. We, and especially my father, were more than ecstatic to find out. Although there was a gloomy shadow that followed close behind the joy. Unfortunately after the birth of my brother Rhaegar, our mother was unable to conceive another that wasn't stillborn. It had taken many tries and heartaches until I was born, but when I was brought into this world, I was told the celebration lasted a month.
"You're going to be a woman soon" grumbled my father as he sat at the head of the table; his hair wispy under his heavy crown and his skin blemished with age spots. My father was far from the man he once was "You should act like it. Playing those childish games of yours is a waste of time. You should be focusing on your studies and etiquette"
"She's only a child" defended mother with a slight scolding tone "Let her play"
Father faced my mother with a sour look "She's not just any girl out on those shit filled streets" he said with a low tone "She's my daughter and the future Queen…do you want her to rule with dignity or prance around like a fool?" looking away at his harsh words, I stared down at my food.
My father is far from kind.
For as long as I've lived I've never known him to be anything but the cruel and controlling man that he is today, and as much as I tried to ignore it, his words always managed to hit a sore part of my heart – like a searing dagger.
"I said leave her be" snapped mother. I wanted to smile but he'd see. I found it somewhat funny at times. Men thrice her size would cower at the presence of Aegon: The Mad King, but not her. She held the fire in her blood and she used it, no matter who it was directed towards. I've wished many times that I could be like her – fierce and enduring, but unfortunately I was no such thing.
Father bit into a chicken leg with a tear of its flesh and I grimaced at the way he ate "We should thank the Gods your brother has a sense to follow my instruction – to learn. To do more than just play in the dirt. If he was as stubborn as you are, we'd all be doomed" he grumbled as he dropped the chicken leg.
Glancing over to the empty seat beside my fathers and across mothers, a sadness had washed over. I missed his so much. Beside my mother, he's all I've ever had. The only other person who knew what it was like to live under the scornful ways of my father. Not saying a word, I continued to eat my meal in a dull quietness. When I had finished and I could no longer stomach my father's crass muttering, I swiftly got up from my seat with a drag of my chair.
"Please excuse me" I said before turning and leaving the dining room.
Striding down the hallway I ignored the curious glances from passing nobles before entering my room and closing the door behind me with a thud. Leaning against the wood, I sighed at the solitary freedom of my room. Gasping, a knock had sounded from the door a few minutes later and the familiar voice of Septa Agatha called out "My lady, are you alright?" she was both my tutor and handmaiden.
Mother must have sent her to make sure I was alright "I'm fine" I replied while opening the door. Standing in her usual pale blue and grey clothing, her entire body was covered except for her aged face "I just needed some time to be alone"
There was a hesitant pause before Septa replied "I see…" she was well aware of the strained relationship between me and my father "…I filled the bath while you were at dinner. If there's nothing else you'd like me to do my lady, I'll leave you in peace for the night if it pleases you" I gave her a smile.
"Thank you Septa, that would be much appreciated" nodding her head, I closed the door and turned around.
Heading over to large tiled room, I walked through the small archway and was met with the hexagon shaped bath; a somewhat thick layer of steam coming off of the water's surface to cloud the room. Glancing around, I slowly started to take off my clothes one piece at a time. Feeling my dress slide down the length of my body to pool onto the ground, I unlaced my corset and took of my shoes and stockings.
Walking over I stepped in one foot at a time, not caring that the water was scalding hot; it never hurt me like it would a 'normal' person. It was like that way with all of my family. When I had first discovered it and asked, mother said it was because we Targaryen's have dragon blood running through our veins. That, like a true dragon, fire could not hurt us. I believed it – even though I'd never seen a real dragon, just the bones they'd left behind.
Settling down in the milky white water, I curled my legs up to my chest as I closed my eyes; the steam and water caressing my skin lulling me into calm state of mind. When I was little, I remember my mother used to sing me an old song from the place of Summerhall; before it was destroyed by the great fire. Humming the same familiar tune, I combed my fingers through my hair and over my gentle skin.
Drifting off into thought, my head rested in my knees as one arm wrapped around my legs and the other played with the water around me. Sitting in the bathtub, I wasn't quite sure why a wave of sadness had suddenly washed over me. Perhaps it was because of many things but as I started to think about it all, the loom of sadness made me deaf to the person standing at the entrance of the bathroom.
"You still remember the song…" gasping, my head snapped up to see a man I wasn't at all expecting standing right in front of me – Rhaegar. Pausing, I felt as if time has slowed down. Was this really happening? Is he really here, right in front of me? I couldn't believe it, but as I looked up and down as he stood dressed in his black clothing with not a mark on his flesh – time had caught up with me again.
"You're here…" my voice was barely a whisper. I was still so shocked. There was no warning for his arrival or letter from a raven. It's like he just appeared out of nowhere – but I'm glad, because it means that he's safe "When did you arrive?"
"An hour ago" and nobody told me I thought with a frown "I wanted to surprise you" he added.
Feeling my throat tighten, I swallowed "I was worried…you were gone for so long. I didn't know if something had happened to you" still sitting in the bathtub with my knees curled upwards I watched made his way over to me. Crouching down beside the bath, I wasn't at all worried that Rhaegar might see me. It didn't matter. It felt good to have him right beside me again, the warm of his body hotter and more comforting that that of the steaming water and Brendon's arms.
"I know" he replied while running the back of his finger over my cheek in a single caress "But you don't have to worry about that anymore…I'm home" closing my eyes, I savoured his touch and the sound of his voice.
Grabbing Rhaegar's hand I kissed the back as I clung to his arm. I didn't want him to ever leave me again. Breathing in his familiar and intoxicating scent, I want to be just like – right by side.