Ash propped her leather boots up against the side of the practice room glass, tired from another day's rehearsal. She breathed a sigh of relief, as she slid against the glass, allowing herself to sink onto the cool floor.
Ever since the Moon Theatre's last performance (or what was left of it), Ash had been losing more and more sleep. Overtime guitar practices had left her with calloused and aching hands, and sometimes she wouldn't return home until half-past twelve, what with balancing a side job at the downtown record store and all.
And her home.
Ash felt her eyes drooping, her stomach churning into a familiar knot.
Each time Ash returned to her apartment, it was so quiet. She had forgotten how noisy Lance was: each night it was either late night television, or a jam session that would always earn them a knock on the door from aggravated neighbors.
Now, all the lights were turned off. The nostalgic scent of pizza and dip had disappeared.
She was alone. Alone in an empty, quiet home.
Feeling herself on the verge of another breakdown, she crawled over to wear her purse was hanging, tugging the zipper open. Quickly, she clutched what she was looking for.
'My dearest Ash,' read the mixtape. 'I hope you will find more use in this then you're mother did-don't tell her I said that. Anyway...keep your chin up! I know someday you'll do amazing things.
'Your biggest fan,
Dad.'
Ash stifled a sniffle, dragging her heavy feet back over towards her high boots. Plugging in the nearby stereo, she clicked the tape in, rewinding the cassette to exactly where she remembered. It felt like the hundredth time.
She pushed play without hesitation, hoisting her Stratocaster over her head.
'Please Ash, I didn't mean any of those things before.'
The drum intro rang out against the thin walls of the rehearsal room.
'Dammit, Ash, Becky means nothing to me now. I only want you!'
Lies, thought Ash bitterly. Everything you said. Everything you did. All lies.
And then, her tears disappeared. The past washed away for a split second.
She was lost in the music. In her music.
Sing it out, boy, you've got to see what tomorrow brings.
Sing it out, girl, you've got to be what tomorrow needs.
For every time that they want to count you out, use your voice
every single time you open up your mouth.
Ash strummed the strings so harshly, she thought she would split the neck in half. Closing her eyes, she spun around on the wooden floor, hearing her raspy voice match with the beat of the stereo.
Sing it for the boys, sing it for the girls.
Every time that you lose it sing it for the world.
Sing it from the heart, sing it till you're nuts.
Sing it out for the ones that'll hate your guts.
Sing it for the deaf, sing it for the blind.
Sing about everyone that you left behind.
Sing it for the world.
Sing it for the world.
She continued around the square room, bobbing her head up and down. If it weren't for reality, which crept slowly up in the back of her mind, Ash told herself she could probably do this forever.
I don't need Lance. She continued onto the next verse. I don't need anybody. I just...I just need me!
She continued throughout her beloved song, her fingers throbbing.
Got to see what tomorrow brings.
Sing it for the world, sing it for the world.
Girl, you've got to be what tomorrow needs.
Sing it for the world, sing it for the world.
Panting, Ash felt a smile curl on her face. Giddy, she whipped around, ready to strike a finale pose, when she found herself staring at a pair of black converse. Dread pulsed through her veins.
Crap, I left the door open.
Angrily, she unhooked her guitar strap, glancing up to find golden eyes staring down at her curiously.
"Wow," the teenage gorilla began. "That...that was brilliant."
Taken aback, Ash turned towards him, feeling her blood rush to her face.
"Y-you think so, huh?" She shuffled over to switch off the stereo before any other songs were revealed that evening. How long had he been standing there?
Johnny nodded, curiously spotting the tape. "I—err—um...Mr. Moon wants us all to head back on stage. Says he's got something important to announce."
Finding her instrument case, Ash willingly opened the straps, her hands stinging.
"Thanks, Johnny," she replied, still deep in thought. "I'll be right...there." But when she gazed back over towards the door frame, the Cockney-accented gorilla was gone.
Strange…
She blinked and quickly gathered her case, boots, and purse, bustling around the corner and through backstage. She found the others sprawled across the stage, almost as tired-looking as she probably did.
Mr. Moon spotted her out of the corner of his eye, not lifting his scrawling pencil from his clipboard.
"Ah, there's our little rockette. Just in time, too."
Ash padded across newly polished floor, the scent of lemon lingering throughout the Moon Theatre. She found a spot between Rosita and Meena, both who gave her a small smile. As she crossed her legs, slipping her boots back on, she heard the hushed tapping of fingers against the wooden floor. Shifting her head slightly, she glimpsed downward to see a large hand, moving across the floorboards like scales on a piano.
Ash briefly looked up at Johnny, watching him stare off into the empty seats of the theatre. He must have sensed her gaze, before he turned to meet her eyes. She quickly whipped around, wondering if he was still looking at the back of her quills.
He's probably still judging me over my escapade earlier. She flushed, still mulling over being caught in the act of...of what? Being herself?
She felt a hand rest on her shoulder, drawing her out of her disquietness.
"Are you okay, dear?" asked Rosita, watching her carefully.
"Oh, yeah," breathed Ash, turning to newest mother-figure. She appreciated Rosita's patience and her level of consideration...something she which Lance had more of.
"Thanks, Rosita."
"Anytime."
Mr. Moon cleared his throat, and the stage quieted of its previous whispers and exchanges of laughter.
"Alrighty, another great practice today, everyone! Gotta keep those pipes in tip-top shape for our next performance."
"Yeah, if only the boss would tell us what exactly the next performance is." murmured Mike, weaving his way throughout the number of legs spread across the performance stage.
Mr. Moon either ignored him or was completely oblivious; nevertheless, he continued with his spiel.
"Now, throughout the past months, I know it's been a struggle, a real endeavor, re-building this theatre and its devoted fans."
There was a collective wave of agreement. Ash rested her head on her cheek.
Not to mention the struggle of finding your boyfriend cheating and being isolated for weeks on end.
"Which is why," Mr. Moon continued. "I am treating you all for your impressive, and greatly appreciated, hard work!"
The theatre was dead silent, before Gunter let out a loud, "Heiliger strohsack*!"
"Ooh, what is it Mr. Moon?" asked Meena, quickly forgetting her timidness. "I mean...if you don't mind me asking."
"I'm glad you asked, Meena. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together, because one week from today you will all be setting sail for the Big Apple!"
The Moon Theatre erupted into a roar of cheering, Gunter nearly passing out onto Rosita, while Meena scooped Ash up into a hug.
"Can you believe it, Ash? New York City!"
"I know," Ash breathed, feeling her body constrict under the embrace of the Indian elephant. "It's...it's hard to believe." Meena released her, muttering a series of apologies.
She wasn't lying; all her life Ash had been confined to the streets of California, living under a roof with her older brothers, and then finding her own place...now minus Lance.
Why, she thought, clenching her fists. Why do I keep thinking about him? It's been nearly a month! She wanted to scream.
Mixed emotions flooding through her system, Ash quickly scooped up her purse, waving goodbye to the others as she leapt down the theatre stairs. She, in that very moment, despised herself, for smiling so openly and pretending to share in their joy. Did she think traveling over two-thousand miles would solve her problems back home? Why couldn't she just let things go?
The fuming, yet saddened porcupine stormed up towards the double doors, barely hearing Mr. Moon prattling on about the following Saturday ("Be here at four sharp; our flight leaves at six!").
She had barely stepped outside, when she felt the tears trickling down her cheeks.
God, what is wrong with me? Hurt and confused, Ash found the nearest trash bin, kicking it with all her might. Nope, still nothing had changed. Except the newly growing ache in her toes.
It was as she went limping off to the bus stop that she heard the noise again.
Tip-tap, tip tip-tap, tip…
Ash rounded the corner, unsurprised to find Johnny slouched at a picnic table.
He was drumming against the tabletop, fixated on the intersection catty corner to the theatre.
Ash nearly turned around, still feeling her eyes full with tears. She didn't think she'd be able to handle any interaction at this time, especially with a soft-spoken gorilla.
It would only make her want to cry more.
Finding the will to move her feet, Ash quickly made for the next block, but was horrified to hear a quiet,
"Ash? Are you okay?"
She clenched her fists, whipping around to face Johnny.
"As if you should be the one asking me. What's your problem?"
Ash watched as the gorilla's eyes widened, and he ducked his head, avoiding her glower. Guilt settled as soon as the words slipped out.
"Wait, Johnny," she started, cautiously walking to where he was seated. "I'm sorry, I—I didn't mean to say that."
She slid her purse across the bench, sitting across from him. Ash suddenly felt self-conscious, and was thankful when she realized she had stopped crying.
"No, you're right." Johnny raise his eyes to her, resuming his tapping. "I am upset."
Wow, he's much more honest than me.
Unsure what to do, Ash blurred out the first thing that came to mind.
"Do you...do you want to talk about it?
She glimpsed down at his large hands, as they became still. Searching his face, Ash felt a strange ache at the pit of her stomach. This was the first time the two had actually talked outside of rehearsals.
After what seemed like hours, the young gorilla finally opened his mouth, surprising Ash even further.
"I can't go to New York."
*Holy moly!
Thank you all for reading!
(Disclaimer: I do not own the rights of Sing 2016 or 'Sing.' All rights go towards Illumination Entertainment and My Chemical Romance.)