Pleather and Candy

A Death Note fanfic by Sailor Red

Happy Halloween, everyone. -

"Just for one night, Ryuuzaki. . . just for one night take this cuff off of my wrist." L swiveled around quickly on his chair to stare at Light with wide, blank eyes. He then pulled his thumb out of his mouth with a soft "pop", placed his hands on the seat of his chair, and leaned forward.

After a full minute of L staring at Light, not moving an inch and not even blinking, Light shook his head and sighed.

"Fine, Ryuuzaki, I didn't expect you to . . ."

"Ok."

Light, as composed a person as he normally was, nearly fell out of his chair. He had to blink a few times and resist the urge to pinch himself awake, for this obviously couldn't be real. He opened his mouth to speak, but L beat him to it.

"There is a condition, of course . . ." the messy haired detective began. Dropping his butt to the seat of his chair and pushing from the desk with his feet, the wide-eyed genius let the chair take him to the partially open door of a closet that was across the room – not quite far enough away to rip Light from his chair, but pretty close.

After a few seconds of rustling around the bottom of the closet, L pulled out a bright yellow plastic bag, purple writing and a smattering of balloons printed all over.

Light instinctively recoiled – just slightly mind you, he was a master at keeping his body language composed . . . there was just something, well, ominous about that bag. It was obviously from some sort of party store, that much Light could deduct. But wait, there was something else nagging at the back of his head . . . something else . . .

The date . . . oh no . . . L couldn't possibly be planning to . . .

Suddenly the bag was dropped in Light's lap, and Ryuuzaki was pulling something out that looked like . . .

No way. Absolutely not. Not in a million years . . .

"You'll have to wear this, Yagami-kun, and accompany me outside with two, no . . ." L licked his lips. "Four pillowcases. We will then . . ."

"No." Light spat. "I don't wear . . . I won't wear that. Nothing will make me agree to . . ."

L didn't miss a beat.

"You'll look fine in that outfit, Yagami-kun. Pleather is quite suitable for this sort of role. I will look far sillier, after all. Besides," L started and then paused to pull out a hat with a great red plume and place it on his own head.

"Every pimp needs his bitch."

All composure that Light had was lost.

"I am NOT your bitch!" He sputtered indignantly, rose to his feet, and stomped.

L would have blinked, had he the ability.

"Temper, Yagami-kun. Your likelihood of being Kira just went up two percent." L placed his thumb in his mouth and looked up towards the ceiling. "Perhaps I should have asked Matsuda to be my bitch. He has a more feminine face, after all." He looked back to Light who was still seething quietly. "I was going to take that cuff off your wrist for the entire evening too. Pity for you, Yagami-kun . . ."

"FINE!" Light exclaimed, pulled the rest of his costume out of the horrid yellow bag, and started to unbutton his shirt; L meandered back to the closet to grab a few more things: a black bag, four pillowcases, and a red coat lined with leopard print. When he turned around, he couldn't resist smirking at the sight he beheld.

For there was Light, standing in the middle of the room . . . wearing nothing but black hot-pants and fishnet stockings, his button-down shirt hanging on handcuff chains.

Still smirking, L pulled out his key and unlocked the cuffs to let Light's shirt drop to the floor. He then handed him a pleather, rhinestone studded, vest, which Light put on while muttering nasty things under his breath.

"Now, now Yagami-kun . . . ah, wait, there's one more thing . . ." L pulled his coat on, handed Light two pillowcases and started digging in the small black bag. With his ever surprising agility, Ryuuzaki pulled the object out – a leather dog collar – and deftly fastened it around Light's neck.

Too shocked to move, Light just stood there dumbly – until the evil genius heard the click of a leash being fastened.

"What the . . . RYUUZA-"

L didn't say anything; he simply pulled on the leash and started dragging Light out of the hotel and down the street, whistling the "Happy Birthday" song cheerfully and practically skipping to the first house with a porch light illuminated. Light simply tried not to choke.