Even Then
Note: Above all relationships or friendships, Breyton is my favorite. They were friends before the show started and their friendship has been a constant for both of them. Now, with all the drama going on with Team Brooke and Team Peyton, which I refuse to choose a side on, I figured I'd get back to the basics and the bonds that do exist between the characters since they were kids that's being downplayed in an attempt to get us fans to pick a side. And on that long-winded note, on with the story.
I do not own One Tree Hill…I'd rather own two tree hills myself although I don't know what a tree hill classifies as anyway. Is it a hill that has a lot of trees on it?
Peyton did tell Brooke she liked Lucas, but that's all she said. The slap did happen, Brooke did point to Lucas' name under the door in anger, and told Peyton not to talk to her, pretty much like their fight on the show except for a few details. And other than that, pretty much everything up to this point has happened on the show with a few little changes, so post 'I Love You, But I Choose Darkness,' is where it starts. Oh, no one is pregnant either.
Lucas and her new real brother, she remembered being told, were talking to the police downstairs in the living room. She crept up the stairs leaving the hot chocolate that had long since turned cold since Lucas had brought it to her as she sat numbly on the couch. She slowly walked down the hall, still hesitant despite the fact that the police had thoroughly checked the house. And as if there weren't enough photographs in her room, it was being photographed for evidence by forensics. But as she came to stand in the doorway silently, the detective she knew from the shooting incident noticed her and ushered everyone out.
The same detective Brooke had run from her hospital room when she'd come back from arguing with a nurse about visiting hours. Brooke had followed after the fleeing nurse determined to convince her she was as much family as if by blood, sparing a quick smile and nod of 'I'm handling this' to Peyton before going into Cheer Nazi lecture mode causing a laugh to escape Peyton with a shake of the head at her best friend.
And the detective had only gotten a few questions out before Brooke had forced him out of the room, she'd never seen Brooke manhandle a guy in such a non-romantic, serious way before. She pushed him right out the door, slamming the door in his face with a satisfied grin.
As she turned back, Peyton sat laughing despite her teary gaze and Brooke's grin faded as she rushed over to sit beside her best friend on the lumpy hospital bed, clasping their hands together. "Aww, Buddy" Brooke cooed sympathetically, as Peyton looked up wiping one side of her face of the tears that had fallen as Brooke got the other with her free hand.
Peyton looked up gratefully, forcing a small smile as she tried to joke, "Thanks, his suit was hurting my eyes, I thought they got rid of tweed suits years ago." And Brooke had laughed, not missing the pain in Peyton's eyes, but going along with her friend's attempt at lightening the mood for now and added, "They did, but there are just those immune to the sickness, I guess" and Peyton had grinned as Brooke squeezed her hand, her knowing eyes looking back at her.
Brooke had not left her side the entire time she'd been in the hospital. Her father did his best when he got there three days later to be there for her, but it was just too hard for him to be in the hospital again after her mother's death. She'd understood when he'd only stop by for an hour or so before leaving Peyton to Brooke who would wink at her father and reassure him that Peyton was in good hands with her. And her father would nod in gratitude that his daughter had such a good friend.
Brooke was the one that only left the hospital when Peyton was asleep or knocked out on pain medication. She was the one that watched Peyton writhe in pain when the medication just didn't numb the pain. The one that endured countless hours of horrible talk shows and TV movies, telling jokes and mocking parts to make it more bearable. When Peyton would jolt awake from a nightmare, Brooke was always there holding her hand and assuaging her worry with cooed words and quiet reassurances.
And she'd been there for Brooke too. She'd hold Brooke as she cried over the guilt she had for losing Peyton in the school and not being there for her. And Peyton would tell Brooke how thankful she was that Brooke had gotten out of the school when she had, how it had helped her knowing she was safe. And every time Brooke would look at her with glassy eyes remembering that fateful day, Peyton would tell Brooke she was okay as many times as it took for Brooke to believe it.
And as Peyton came out of her daze, she realized that Brooke wouldn't be here this time. And as she looked down at the blood covered lawn from her spot in the room, she teared up with the knowledge. And she actually smiled sadly at that, if Brooke stayed away than she knew that Derek, or whatever his stalker-ass name was, would have no reason to try anything with her, she wasn't a threat.
Peyton had heard the murmured words about the prostitute's striking resemblance to herself and the crazed words spoken to her as she'd been pinned violently against the wall. 'Threats' that was what everyone in her life was to him, people that needed to be removed to get to her. And the fact that she'd spent more time in reality the last couple weeks with "Derek" than with Lucas or anyone else that summer made her cringe. And as morbid a thought as it was, how sad it was that there was only one person that had posed any threat to the guy, not a boyfriend or her father, but the now wounded Lucas downstairs.
Brooke's words rang through her head, "Your I love you's send people to their grave." But, this one time, Peyton knew how wrong Brooke was, how untrue her words were. It was the ones who loved her that ended up hurt, not the people she cared about that got hurt, and Peyton hated herself for that. Her moms, Jake, Lucas, even Nathan. And Brooke had gotten hurt the most, and it was mostly Peyton's fault and she knew it. Brooke had suffered the most at her hands, and Peyton was happy for Brooke that she'd walked away despite the fact that she missed Brooke more than she ever could imagine.
If Brooke didn't care, didn't love her, she couldn't get hurt and that's all that Peyton wanted for Brooke, she'd been hurt enough despite the tough exterior that her best friend exuded. And as she'd said to Brooke years ago, she "may not be Brooke's best friend anymore but she was still hers." And it was still true, despite the fact that Brooke was now buddy-buddy with Rachel, and her friendship with Haley was as strong as ever, Peyton still thought about a thousand things a day to say to Brooke, to joke about or talk about during class, only to realize she could only hold them in regretfully. And each time she did she hated herself for the fact that she could say all those things, do all those things, if she hadn't ruined it.
She knew it was a mistake as soon as the words left her mouth wrong, she liked Lucas sure, but she loved Brooke and the bond they had so much more. She loved Lucas as the best friend that he had come to be, but there was only one person that she loved more than anything in her life to this point, and that was her best friend. Brooke was everything Peyton had ever needed all rolled into one. She was protective like a parent, caring and gentle like a mother, forward and blunt like a brother, and the best friend that a girl could have. And for a long time it was all that the two of them had needed, each other. They were each other's family and friends wrapped into one and since they lacked that with their blood relatives, they'd never thought that that relationship wouldn't be there.
But Peyton felt the lose of Brooke since her stupid mistake. She felt it every time she looked at her closet and saw Brooke's familiar handwriting staring back at her. She'd tried to paint over it so she wasn't always reminded, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. It felt like if she did, it would mean the end of her and Brooke. And although they weren't friends anymore, some part of her thought that the words still being there meant their friendship still existed. That those words kept what they used to have still alive, it was pathetic when she really thought about it, but it was that hope that what was keeping her going. Her friendship with Brooke had been the one thing in her life that she could always count on.
Peyton had distanced herself from Lucas after the wedding, she'd told him she wasn't in love with him like she wished she'd been able to tell Brooke. She told him they needed to stay away from each other if either of their relationships with Brooke had a chance of surviving. And with Brooke not talking to her and being so upset, she couldn't get the chance to clarify despite her numerous attempts. And the only times Peyton saw Brooke anymore she was with someone and when she would try and talk to her, Brooke wouldn't respond. She'd get shot down viciously by Rachel or regretfully by Haley and Mouth.
It was why she'd taken so readily to finding her brother. Spending all her time with him would take up the time she would have normally spent with her friends, which was quite a lot. It had felt good to have someone that wasn't on Brooke or her side, but someone who just wanted to talk regardless of what was going on between her and Brooke. Jake had been there the first time her and Brooke had taken opposite sides against each other, and so when Derek had shown up, she'd seen him as someone that could be that person for her this time. Now, she wished she'd just wallowed in her own misery, it would have been less painful.