Chapter 1: Saved Once Again
(A/N): It's the first I've published here on . R&R!! Many more to come. I've gotten 6 chapters mapped out for this one and depending on where I take it will be 10-15 chapters. 2k words average a chapter. Though ch5 will be kinda long and REALLY good. Enjoy!
Disclaimer:
Me: Hey Edward! OMG I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! Be mine!!!
Edward: HeroinAngel I've told you time and time again-
Me: I know I know you love Bella Swan and Stephenie Meyer! Why can't you love me though?
Edward: Stephenie is my creator! And Bella is the love of my life! There isn't room for you!
Me: Why not?! *pouts*
Edward: Besides what kind of name is HeroinAngel?
Me: well.. I'm your personal brand of Heroin…and I'm an angel…
Edward: You're really obsessed with me aren't you?
Me: You have no idea…Please just one date?
Edward: I belong to Stephenie and Bella!!
Me: *starts crying*
I do not own Edward sadly or any of the other brilliant characters Stephenie Meyer created. Our goddess Stephenie owns the Twilight saga. I'm only borrowing them temporarily for this hopefully wonderful fan fiction.
Excerpt from 'New Moon' pg 358-
It was not hard to convince myself that I didn't have time to search for another way-I wanted to jump from the top. This was the image that had lingered in my head. I wanted the long fall that would feel like flying. I knew that this was the stupidest, most reckless thing I had done yet. The thought made me smile. The pain was already easing, as if my body knew that Edward's voice was just seconds away…The ocean sounded very far away, somehow farther then before, when I was on the path in the trees. I grimaced when I thought of the probable temperature of the water. But I wasn't going to let me stop. The wind blew stronger now, whipping the rain into eddies around me. I stepped out to the edge, keeping my eyes on the empty space in front of me. My toes felt ahead blindly, caressing the edge of the rock when they encountered it. I drew in a deep breath and held it…waiting. "Bella."
I smiled as the relief of hearing his voice washed over me like the water on the rocks below. "This is why I came here" she thought. To hear his beautiful velvety smooth voice yell at me for breaking the promise he forced me to make. When he tore a gaping hole in my heart, my angelic vampire made me promise not to do anything stupid or reckless. In return he promised "it will be as if he'd never existed". He broke that promise the moment he made it. This is the sole purpose I was here, to break my promise in return and listen to his velvety voice scream to warn me of the danger I purposefully put myself into.
"Bella no!"
I was confused as I listened to the voice scream my name. This wasn't the smooth velvet voice I had hoped for. I felt a twinge of disappointment at this realization. I came out of the trance I had fallen under when something warm grabbed me from behind pulling me away from the edge of the cliff. Away from the danger. And more importantly away from Edward.
"Bella what do you think you are doing? Have you seen those monstrous waves? A storm is coming in Bells, you could have been killed. Were you trying to kill yourself?"
I looked up into the worried eyes of Jacob Black my personal sun and felt the guilt of worrying him punch me in the gut. "You really think I would try and commit suicide Jake?"
"Ha ha no I guess not."
"Burr can we go inside?" I asked.
Jake pulled me even closer to him and I warmed up instantly. "Better?" he asked. I realized my teeth had quit chattering. "Much."
"Want to go back to my place or do you want me to take you home?" he asked me.
"Can you drop me off at my place please? I want to check up on Charlie. He can't be doing that well after Harry's death and all."
"Sure thing Bells. We're going to have to go back to my place though and get you're truck so I can drop you off. I don't want you walking that far, you'll catch your death in this storm. You're already soaking wet from this rain."
He was right I had to admit. I looked down at myself and realized I was soaked from head to toe. 'When did it even start raining?' I thought briefly confused. I was too caught up in the prospect of hearing Edward's voice to notice the pouring down rain until now.
"Well how are you going to get home then? You're going to catch you're death if you walk back from my place?" I questioned him forgetting about his wolf traits momentarily.
"I'm a wolf Bells, we don't get sick remember? I'll be fine don't worry about me I can take care of myself. It's you I'm worried about" he retorted.
"Oh right" I replied, "I forget that you're a big scary werewolf sometimes." I chuckled.
Jacob found this funny. I missed seeing him this way. Usually he laughed and smiled all the time but because of Victoria hunting to kill me and all, Jacob and the rest of the pack had been a little busy vamp hunting. His happiness was contagious I had to admit. It was nearly impossible to listen to his laughter or bare witness to his smile and not give one in return. He was my own personal sun. I was wordlessly exuberant of Jacob's seemingly unconditional love for me.
I don't know where I would be without him. Most likely living like a zombie as I had done during the immediate months after 'the incident'. Charlie was grateful of Jake as well. I realized now it was practically breaking his heart to see me in the condition Edward left me in. I expected to bend over clutching the big hole in my chest from just mentally saying his name. I did this to prevent that hole from opening further as I was accustomed to.
His name had become forbidden to think of and even more so to speak. Charlie and the rest of my friends had learned this quickly. However, when I was with Jacob I never worried about those things. He seemed to plug the gaping hole in my chest and hold me together.
I laughed leaving Jacob puzzled as we continued walking to the Black's house. It was a little comical to think I'd almost said the most cheesy line ever, in spite of how true it was: Jacob Black made me hole. Maybe not completely, but just the right minimum to function normal enough for Charlie's sake at least.
"What's so funny?" he asked puzzled.
"It's nothing" I lied as we walked up the muddy road that led to the Black's house. I had spent so much time here lately and around La Push, it felt like home. Billy and everybody else here on the reservation might have well have been family. The thought reminded me of how I once thought the Cullen's: Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, and Rosalie (well maybe not so much Rosalie) felt like my family once upon a nightmare. I had spent so much time I their beautiful house it felt like home as well. Normally such thoughts would be crippling to my fragile heart but my Jacob prevented any such affects from happening.
"I'm going to go get you some towels to dry off with alright? Then I'll drive you home so you can check up on Charlie."
"Sounds good" I agreed. Jacob picked me up squeezing me into his chest.
"Can't breath" I fought to say.
"Sorry Bells. Be back in flash." With that Jacob left me cold momentarily to get some towels so I could attempt to dry off. This made no sense due to the simple fact I was standing in the pouring rain. I didn't question him however. Sometimes Jacob seemed to be a few cards short of a full deck.
He was only gone for about two minutes before returning with a few towels. Before I could grab a towel to dry myself off, Jacob began drying me off instead. I silently protested but allowed him to do this. It was quite entertaining for the first few minutes. Then he tried drying my hair. I relinquished Jake from his activities to save me from undoubtedly getting a headache. He had a tendency to be quite rough sometimes. Poor boy doesn't know his own strength sometimes.
Jake grabbed me with his enormous blazing hot hand and squeezed almost too tight while dragging me inside. "Before you go anywhere I'm going to make you some hot cocoa to warm you up inside. I can only be your external heater. No buts" he demanded. "Come on".
"Fine. Not like I can protest anyways. Maybe it might actually do me some good to dry off inside yah know, where it's not raining like cats and dogs." I playfully pouted.
"Oh ha ha my bad. True you don't have the option of protesting. I'm only like a gazillion times stronger then you are." Jacob smirked at me. I couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sure you could take me if you really tried Bella" he insisted.
"Not likely. You said yourself you're like a gazillion times stronger then me. There's no way I could take you in a million years" I admitted. We reached his cozy house, my second home, and walked through the door. The contrast between temperatures was nice; even though I had a heater to keep me warm. I was no longer getting poured on.
As we walked in the house Billy was sitting in his wheel chair watching TV. He looked up momentarily to greet me. "Hey Bella. Wow your soaked. What happened?" he inquired.
Jake interjected my response. "Bella decided she wanted to go cliff diving without me" he paused then laughed, "in the middle of the storm. If I didn't know Bella any better I'd swear she's turned into an adrenaline junkie."
"Charlie probably wouldn't be too happy if he knew you were planning on going cliff diving today. It would probably be on the top of his list of the stupidest most reckless behaviors." He added suspiciously, "along with riding motorcycles" and laughed.
I smiled internally as I thought to myself, 'that's the entire point.'
"You didn't jump did you?" Billy asked with a concerned look on this face.
I looked at Jacob expecting him to answer for me again, I was surprised when he let me answer for myself. "No. I'm soaked because of the rain. Jake and I had plans to go cliff diving today," I explained, "but I didn't want to wait any longer for him to return from patrolling so I decided to just go ahead and jump by myself." I took a moment to remember the sweet velvety smooth voice I had waited to hear on the edge of the dangerous beautiful cliff. "Jacob got there and pulled me away from the edge before I could jump" I finished almost solemnly.
"Bella you could have been killed. Those waves would have swallowed you up. You're lucky Jacob was there to save you." Billy praised.
"Yah I really am" I replied with a smile. 'In more then one way' I thought as I looked over at Jacob's face.
Before now I hadn't really realized just how handsome he was. Since prom he had really grown into a good looking guy. Granted he was two years younger then me, in fake ages though he was nearly forty, so I guess that evened things out a bit. Frequently he liked to remind me of this fact.
For a splint second I thought about what it would be like to kiss my Jacob. To stake a claim on him and be able to truthfully call him my Jacob. 'What about him…' I wasn't even able to say his name most of the time. 'I wasn't capable of returning the love Jacob felt for me. Was I?' I wondered. For an instant I thought maybe I could do it. It was impossible to ever get over him entirely, but maybe, just maybe it was possible to get over him enough to be somewhat happy. The thought was selfish I knew.
However, the it only lasted a few moments as I was brought back from my thoughts and into reality again. The reality was that I couldn't love Jacob like he deserved to be loved. And it was hopeless and selfish to think otherwise.
"Yo, Earth to Bella. Any one home? Your hot chocolate is ready." Jacob was scrutinizing me while I zoned out.
"What?" I shook my head of the hopeless thoughts and returned my attention to Jacob.
"Your so odd sometimes Bella Swan. I said your hot chocolate is done" he repeated.
"Oh thanks. Sorry just sort of out of it I guess. I'm back though" I tried to be nonchalant about how oblivious I had just been.
"Good. I took the liberty of putting in a travel mug so you could take it with you. Ready to go?" he asked.
"Thanks. And yah I think so." I looked around to see if I was leaving anything here. 'Oh well' I thought, 'I'll be back tomorrow.' A smile played on my features at this thought. I wasn't sure if Jake had noticed or not but I almost hoped he had.
"Alright. Hey dad I'm going to go drop Bella off at home okay?" It was more of a statement then a question.
Billy was absorbed into the TV program. "Yah sure" he replied almost as oblivious as I had been a few moments ago. Though definitely not for the same reasons.
With that I followed sipping my hot cocoa behind Jacob. He opened up the door for me like a perfect gentleman. After Jacob climbed into my rusty old truck, he revved up the engine and was off to my house. The windshield wipers didn't do much good. Rain was coming down so fast they proved to be fruitless.
But I knew my Jacob would get me home safe. I trusted him with my life. There is no way he would hurt me. Looking out the window I thought again about what it would be like to call him my Jacob. It would be so easy…but could I do it? Did I want to do it was the ultimate question.
I knew it was foolish but I still had a flash of hope that Edward still loved me and that he would come back for me. I knew it was useless but I couldn't rid myself of the small shred of hope.
~END OF CHAPTER 1~
(A/N): What will happen when they return to the house? Hmmm guess you'll have to wait! R&R!! I will love you guys forever!! Even though it's my first fanfic published on here don't spare my feelings you can tell me if it sucks!! 1 good comment and maybe 1 thing I could improve on or something you didn't like about the story? Please and thank you! Next chapter will be up within the next week. I'm hoping to post about one chapter a week maybe more if you guys review enough to inspire me. Again R&R!!!! Show me some love!!!