Disclaimer: I will never own Jimmy Neutron.
Cindy was a very strong person, both physically and mentally. She was not only the wittiest, but also the brashest. The last one to fall and the last one to even bother think about giving in. No one can last longer than her. She was truly something else.
That's what people think about me. I never lose the will to fight and stand tall. I'm the only one who will never even think about losing to anything. I never back down, never once waver through anything. I'm steadfast and only look forward. Nothing can go pass through me. Nothing. Because I'm not some scaredy-cat. Definitely not, I'm the gallant lion, braver than anyone else.
I truly am pleased with my front.
Yes, what I said was front. Everything everyone sees is a terribly beautiful act. A very well set-up play and I'm the only character. Now, unlike most plays, no one has a clue that it is nothing more than a carefully woven mask. Everyone's fooled by Cindy, because she's the only one they know. They don't know who Cynthia Aurora Vortex is. And it's better that way.
Why? Because no one will ever appreciate Cynthia. No one would accept her. She'll be a lone sad girl. Someone who everyone could care less about. Not even Neutron would want to find out who Cynthia is, Cindy is who he needs. A person as daring as her. I can't tell anyone. Most especially mom and dad, they're proud of me, or rather proud of Cindy. I'm not the daughter they need. I can't disappoint them, no matter what. And I don't want to break that pride in them. No one would want to upset they're parents.
Cynthia, after all is nothing more than a shy, timid girl. A stupid child nobody will ever care about. All I can really ever be is someone tentative, useless and pathetic. Why would someone even notice someone as irrelevant as who I really am? The only thing I can do that isn't completely a waste of time is using my brain. But I'm not as smart as people give me credit for. I can only answer those things by doing extra work. Truth to be told, I only sleep 3-4 hours a day. People just don't notice because I have sensitive hearing. I can hear footsteps rather easily and I have fast reflexes. And make-up can do absolute wonders.
But even with all the hard work, I'm still not the best one. But then again, being second is better than being nothing at all. Though whenever I think about it, it really pains me. If I never pretended to be someone else, I really would end up alone. No Libby, no Nick, no Neutron, Carl or even Sheen. All I'll ever be is a ghost, transparent and alone.
All I'll ever be is an actress. A fake. No more than a girl hiding under an unbreakable mask.
Wow, I'm doing alot of angst drabbles. And if you're wondering why they're short, it's just that I can't capture the emotion for a long time. You have to bear with me. I can only grasp the pain for a while.
This'll be dedicated to my best friend Marzmallow (refer to my fave authors) or what others know as Mariel. She created this character and goes by that name in her accounts. So she pretends to be that girl. But sometimes she doesn't want to just pretend, she wants to be the actual character. And that's where I got the idea.