Hello, friends! This is a oneshot that I've written for artemisday (iamartemisday on tumblr) for the #LokaneDecktheHalls Story Exchange. Although this isn't a human AU, as mystery really isn't my best suit, I interpreted your original prompt with my own twist.
Key Details:
Loki is discovered as Odin, and he is locked away again without thought. Jane needs help traversing the universe, and who better than the god of mischief? A killer madman that once saved a mortal, and a mortal with limited time: this is their story.
Also, a few references from Agents of SHIELD have been added. Nothing much, just minute details you can easily find through Google if needed!
Thanks! Enjoy!
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"Are you prepared to risk the very life you have built?"
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"Gone."
Jane raised a brow, "Excuse me?"
"Three doctoral degrees," Darcy dramatically retorted.
A gentle sigh burst from Jane's lips. "Here we go," she murmured to herself.
"All that chemistry with Thor."
The astrophysicist rolled her eyes, but righted her obvious foul mood at the mention of Thor. "Anything else, princess?"
Darcy jabbed her finger at Jane and opened her mouth, but no words ignited behind her expression. A wave of distraction settled over the assistant, "I hate it when you call me that." After a moment, Darcy snapped and returned right back to her lecturing...in phrases. "How can you agree to work with him?"
Jane shrugged absently. "I said yes."
"What about everything he's done?" Darcy countered, obviously not appreciating Jane's timing of ill-placed sarcasm.
In order to avoid redundant questions, Jane stopped walking and pulled Darcy by her shoulders toward her. Soft, pleading eyes were met with a cold, hard gaze. After a moment of relentless staring, Jane backed away and crossed her arms over her chest. "Darcy..."
"No!" the assistant snapped sternly.
"I agreed to help."
Darcy kicked her heel against the pavement. "Yes, but with what?"
Jane bit her lip. "That's between me and Asgard."
Two hands snaked around Jane's shoulders. Darcy' left eye twitched slightly, nearly unnoticeable if one weren't paying as much attention to her as Jane was. In a quick motion, Jane was tugged toward her friend into a tight embrace, "He killed countless of innocent people while he led an army against New York City. He lusted after the Aether. You thought he was killed, and then he was suddenly taken captive while attempting to kill his father to take the throne of Asgard."
"You're worrying about me too much."
Darcy pulled away and rolled her eyes, "Someone needs to. You're not thinking clearly enough about what you're doing."
"Fine, mother."
"Can you really fault me for worrying about you? Look at Erik! He is crazy now!" Darcy shouted.
Jane glanced up at the sky and closed her eyes. She inhaled slowly. After a while, her eyes opened, but she didn't look at her friend at all. She only focused on the bright blue sky that held all of her dreams in many lightyears and eons.
The wind pacified her tentative heart which heated irregularly only for a second. Her hair danced as a breeze passed her languidly. Her chin lowered and a ghost of a smile teased her mouth, "I'm trying to be as mindless about this as possible, Darcy."
Activity disrupted the otherwise clear New Mexican sky. It was time to face the adventure in front of her.
"After all, this was my crazy idea."
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"Can you tame a wildfire with your bare hands?"
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Gravel, sand, and brush crunched underneath four pairs of shoes. Trekking through a desert may not be preferable to the Asgardians and Darcy, but with SHIELD destroyed, discretion was the key element to this whole arrangement.
Many would see the disturbance in the sky. That meant they needed to relocate as far away from that spot as possible.
"Jane, how much longer? I was not under the impression you would require me for this duration of time," echoed a raspy, golden voice behind her.
"Thor, this environment is leagues more preferable to, say, ice and snow. Besides, we're almost there," Jane snapped without looking behind her.
A shaky, but firm chuckle growled beside the blond, burly man. "Ooh, brother...your woman no longer responds to you in kind. Whatever shall we do to rectify this?"
Jane's fist shook mildly and her brow twitched in reply. "Can we just walk around this desert in silence? We all love a little silence occasionally. So please shut up!"
"Such eloquence your mortal possesses, brother," Loki retorted.
"I think all people present wouldn't mind if you socked him again, Jane. That'll make you feel empowered for sure," Darcy added dryly. "It would sure as hell make me feel better."
In the distance, Jane saw a black suburban vehicle moving in the waves of the horizon. She continued to guide them toward it.
Darcy pulled on Jane's thin shirt. "Black suburbans are usually a sign of SHIELD," she reminded the scientist.
"I'm glad you could recall that, but seeing as how SHIELD is having their own version hot potato with division of power throughout the world, they're not a big threat for now."
"I hate SHIELD, though," Darcy continued.
Jane laughed, "Then, you really won't like what'll shortly happen."
Darcy whined. "I don't like where this is going."
"Jane, I doubt withholding such information is beneficial for me. I have denounced my crown in an effort to better to protect earth. There is no reason to keep this from me. I require the details of which my father and you discussed," Thor projected delicately.
The closer the party drew toward the black car, the longer Jane's pronounced silence seemed to entertain both Loki and Jane in a subtle, quiet way. Privately, they were oblivious to the other's enjoyment.
Darcy lifted her short sleeve shirt over her head. "Gosh, it's hot." Now, the mortal woman only wore a tank top. "How long have we been walking?"
Jane took another step toward the black vehicle now maybe a quarter mile away from them by careless estimation. "An hour and a half."
"Do you have any water? I drank mine already." Whether Darcy was asking Thor, Jane, or Loki was unclear.
A water container nearly hit Darcy's jaw, but the woman caught it in enough time. Jane irritably retorted, "Ask and you shall receive."
When Thor saw that Jane didn't have her water, the god of thunder reached out and pulled Jane toward him, promptly stopping her in her tracks.
A snide expression was thrown over her shoulder. "Now is not the time to tell me how fragile I am, okay?" she jeered. Her eyes narrowed in order to provoke him...to try and make her see his reason.
"Jane," he timidly started. He inhaled and released the tense breath accordingly, "I know that I have failed you in many ways, but keeping me out of your plans is not the answer."
"It's really too bad this exclusive, one-time limited offer couldn't come packaged with that nifty device that shut Lorelei up on her way back to Asgardian prison. Including all three of you present, I think Loki is the least likely candidate I'd mussel," the astrophysicist quipped.
A hand on Jane's left shoulder pulled her attention away from Thor. "What is the matter?"
Two shaking hands cradled the side of Jane's head. "When we get to the car, I'll continue speaking. But for the love of whatever god you deem worthy enough to serve, shut. the. fuck. up!"
After three seconds precisely, Jane paced toward the car again. Despite her travel-sized stature, the others seemed to have trouble matching her determination and speed. Though Thor with Loki (bound by chains) in tow.
He was exceeding her speed now.
Stupid muscle cramp.
"Jane."
When he said no more, she tilted her head and coldly said, "Thor."
"Can we please take this power walk down to a casual pace?" Darcy pleaded. And after only a minute of silence, she added, "Who's Lorelei?"
"Yes, how is it that you know of her?" Thor questioned.
"Hah!" Jane started a bit over eagerly. She cleared her throat and offered a diabolical grin. "That's the fun part," she answered. Quickly, she shifted to look directly at Loki. "I think you'll appreciate the ghost in that car. Of all people to understand about coming back from the dead."
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"Where do your passions lay, Jane Foster?"
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"Coulson!" Jane said warmly with her arms extended out toward him.
An unsettling chuckle emitted from his chest. He adjusted his tie before responding, "I see you brought my killer."
Shaking his hand, she smiled awkwardly, "Surprise!"
"Let's get right down to this, then," he said.
Coulson gaped at the two Asgardians and her assistant, who were all standing several years away from Jane and Coulson. "Do they have any idea what's going on?"
The left side of Jane's mouth tugged downwardly, "Not a one. But that doesn't matter. All that matters is that you have Thor to help you with whatever you need. I expect you to take Darcy and discreetly protect her...but try to give her the royal treatment. I'm not a big fan of the Fury treatment."
"Jane," he began hesitantly, "tell me about the Aether."
"It's...quiet right now. Every day, I feel it growing more and more powerful, though. You understand the urgency of this whole arrangement," she tentatively spoke while her eyes surveyed the horizon.
Agent Coulson reached for her shoulder and squeezed it gently as he nodded, "What will I tell them?"
Brown eyes shot to meet the man's warm gaze. "In a perfect world, they'd forget me; since this isn't a perfect world, though, I suppose just tell them I'm forcing Loki to take me to different worlds to find artifacts that will help SHIELD reclaim its power back. I think it's the most believable explanation they're likely to believe.
"Loki kinda needs to be sentenced in the eyes of SHIELD, so you could just say this whole arrangement is his sentence, since Odin refuses to turn him over to you," the scientist elaborated.
He nodded and smiled lopsidedly. "I will work with you on this. At the end of the day, you're going to help a lot of people."
"And if not, I'm traveling with the one person who will kill me," she added without a retrievable expression.
The man moved back and put on his shades, quickly throwing a lazy look back at the three individuals fifty yards away from them. "Don't you think you need to say goodbye?"
"Thor wouldn't understand. Darcy would find a way to convince him to take her to Asgard or something. That or she'd find Ian and seek comfort. I'm gambling on Asgard, though," Dr. Foster explained idly.
Phil checked his wrist: presumably a watch of some sort. His hand moved to his ear, and he said something about being somewhere shortly. When Jane turned away from him, he grabbed her arm. "How was Asgard?"
When she looked at him, her eyes were filled with unshed moisture. Eventually, she looked up and let the hot, dry breeze soothe her aching heart. Without sparing him a backwards glance, she closed her eyes and turned away from him, but did not begin to walk toward the other three.
A smile whisked over her lips. "Asgard was peaceful, archaic, and serene. The sunset seems to be permanent because the sky always has sprinkles of orange, pink, and lavender. The nights, though, were the best. There is a special magic of an Asgardian night sky. Constellations were different, and I tried many times to see anything familiar."
"And did you?"
"No."
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"Darcy," Jane warned.
"You're asking me to go with SHIELD!"
She nodded. "I know what I'm asking, but you can't come with me. Your place is here. I'm needed elsewhere."
"I won't leave you, Jane."
Jane's gaze felt distant even to herself. "This is where I leave you."
Turning away from Darcy, Jane heard loud stumbling until the footsteps went quiet. When Jane glanced over her shoulder, Coulson nodded with Darcy thrown over his shoulder.
Thor ran toward Jane and left Loki—still bound by chains—by himself unattended.
"Thor, please go with Phil. I need you here helping what's left of SHIELD defend against things far worse than Loki could ever be."
"I demand to know what the purpose of this is!"
"This is something I have to do on my own. Well, alone with Loki."
"Why? Jane-"
"For heaven's sake!" Jane roared.
Her legs moved her hastily toward Loki. In a flash of mindless adrenaline, Jane did something stupid.
She took Loki's chains.
She pulled them toward her.
Loki sent her a death glare, but ultimately moved toward her.
Then, Jane slithered her hand back over his neck and pulled him down.
Jane kissed Loki.
It was perhaps the only way to make Thor understand that they were nothing anymore.
At first, she felt Loki push her away. His strength nearly made it impossible for her to steady herself over his mouth.
Until she opened her sealed lips and slipped a gentle preview of tongue into his mouth.
He stilled and she opened her eyes.
Her stomach tightened into an uncomfortable knot.
This felt so unnatural. So lethally abrasive against her now timid demeanor.
His hands were bound, but she felt him reaching for her a second after he touched his tongue with hers.
His fingers clutched her shirt tightly and pulled her toward him.
Her eyes remained half-lidded to give the effect of a passionate joining, but she wanted to watch him in case he lunged at her.
He didn't.
Loki's eyes raised, almost rolling senselessly, and his lids fluttered half-closed and closed a few times.
He appeared at best a bit tipsy.
He was sharp, so she knew he knew what she was doing.
Plus, it probably gave him pleasure to upset his brother.
In a rush, Jane moved her hand down from his neck and began to unlock the chains. They still kissed.
Thor began to rush toward them with his hammer high over his head.
Jane pulled away from Loki, but he still ducked his head toward her to continue his ministrations.
Until he whiled Jane behind him and held up his left arm. A translucent barrier sent Thor nearly flying in the opposite direction.
In a rush, Jane moved the ten or so yards to collect her backpack. Loki followed after her and wrapped his arm around her waist while he avoided Thor's hammer several times.
And then, sound muted and Jane's eyes met Loki's.
Time stood still while they held each other's gaze. Eventually, the background faded into a bright green, and they were no longer on Midgard.
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"Can you renounce everything you have been taught to learn a new course of life?"
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Loki heaved, struggling to breath it appeared.
Immediately, she'd ripped herself away from the mad prisoner.
Instead, Jane kneeled down and withdrew a few items from the backpack, including a shirt, socks, a frame, and a knife.
She stood up after placing the items back into the bag and presented him with his knife. "I took this off of your body when I thought you'd died," the mortal said. He made no move toward her. In fact, his features were unbearably unreadable. "It's about time I returned it to you."
"This whole arrangement was so you could get me away from Thor."
A statement.
"The long or the short answer?"
No reply.
Jane sighed. "You were sentenced to the dungeons for the rest of your life."
The madman stepped once in her direction while he crossed his arms. He licked his lips and opened his eyes wider.
He was a predator.
In an instant, he snickered lowly. "I was unaware of your devotion to my well-being."
"I wouldn't call it devotion, but you saved my life once," she countered. Her eyes never left his.
His grin unnerved her. His right eye twitched slowly as his lip exaggerated his pale features, "And what of the many times I've tried to have you or your kind destroyed?"
"I'm not expecting you to be grateful. We're here to find artifacts that can stop something called Thanos," Jane retorted. Though her stature was far shorter than his elegant, long one, she kept her chin high when she spoke. Her hand dropped the knife as she passed Loki, which he immediately caught in his left hand instinctively.
Silence filled the void of any sassy comeback or retort from the "god" of mischief. And she was somewhat disappointed.
It was then that she took in her surroundings.
They were in a forest, thick with green and colors of all contrast. Though she sensed no signs of animal life, her eyes feasted on a rather large paw print that resembled the shape of a black bear, just amplified by two.
It wasn't hot, but it wasn't cool. Actually, she felt pretty average, despite the beautiful scenery to behold.
Flowers decorated the area bordering where they stood. The ground was littered with rocks in all shapes and sizes. Although she wasn't a botanist, she couldn't recognize any of the plants or flowers in her vicinity.
About to inquire about where they were, Jane turned around and stared at Loki's back. He hadn't moved.
Raising a brow, she inched her way toward him so that she was still behind him, but off to his right so he would notice her in his peripheral. "Was it something I said?" she cheeked.
His expression held a faint horror in them; barely there, but present. His bright eyes moved over her, "Thanos?"
"Yep. Odin caught word of the importance of that thing's end," she quickly spoke.
After what seemed to be an hour within a brief second, he laughed maniacally. A hand cradled his abdomen while he nearly buckled over in doing so.
"I'm glad you're taking this with utmost seriousness..." she trailed.
Laughter ensued for about a minute. It had to be a minute. She counted every second. Precisely sixty of them.
His back straightened accordingly when he tried to right himself after his moment of insanity. "You are trying to get me killed."
"Exactly the opposite. If we can find certain objects, we could beat him, or so the almighty Allfather seems to think so."
The wind stilled around them. His stupid grin went flat, "Let me be clear: Odin is trying to get me killed."
"The Aether is still inside of me," Jane blurted out.
That only provoked his brow to raise. Slightly. "Oh?"
Nodding as if trying to understand his statements, she rolled her eyes with a sigh, "This path is designed for only me to die."
"You've yet to me Thanos."
"Say what you will, but you're not here to die."
A strand of green in his eyes displayed an active interest in her. "And what are you here for?"
"I'm here to see that you don't."
He chuckled. "Odin sends me a mortal for protection. How is that not a death sentence?"
Silence. Jane shifted the bag against her back before saying, "The Aether is what's killing me. Unless there's a way to make me not-a-mortal, then I will die. You'll make it easier for quick traveling across the universe. Together, though, we need to solve this."
He smiled and pulled his hands behind his back. He circled her, but remained behind her. The backpack was the only space between them. "And what if I refuse?"
She shifted on her heels and offered a lame, lopsided smile, "When I die, the Aether will need a new host. If you comply, and I die, then the Aether is yours."
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"When you're hands lifted from my skin, fire licked where you touched me and embedded your fingerprints?"
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Thanks for reading! Happy Holidays and a wonderful New Year!