OMGWTF?! Watch out for the fangirls!
By
Liah Cauthon
Chapter One
I'm going to kill Mat
Under no circumstances do I own or profit from The Wheel of Time. I own only Liah, Alana, and all other OCs.
A girl stared out of a window, oblivious to the world around her.
"Carai an Ellisande!" someone called
"I'm coming!!" The girl said, running to the front door. "Password??"
"Car'a'carn. May I come in now Liah??" The door swung open to admit a girl with red-gold hair tied back with a scarf. She wore a bulky brown skirt and white blouse, with at least ten gold and silver necklaces and twice as many carved bracelets. "So how do I look??" Alana asked.
"Like a Wise One straight out of the books, Alana. What about my costume??" Liah asked. She was garbed in long yellow pants and a brown coat with a silver bow and silver arrows in a brown quiver across her back, while her blonde hair had been tied into an intricate braid.
"Awesome!! You look just like Birgitte!" Alana exclaimed.
"Onward to the Anime con!!" They said, grabbing bags and heading out the door.
"Well than was certainly something else." Liah said as she flopped down on her bed. Her golden braid was in slight disarray and her costume was rumpled. Alana had called the shower first so she had some time to burn before it was her turn.
'I've definitely seen enough State Alchemists and Wheel of Time characters for one day.' She thought undoing the intricate braid her hair was in. Liah was halfway through the first chapter of Knife of Dreams when all of a sudden a large blast of light tore her from the book and something fell from the ceiling.
"Blood and ashes what was that??" A voice asked.
"I don't know Mat. Maybe this has something to do with the power, or the Forsaken." Another voice stated.
" I've got a better question, where in the Light are we??" A third voice rose from the confusion.
"Who the bloody hell are you??" Liah asked the voices, reaching for a dagger she kept under her pillow.
"Bloody hell, what's going on??" Alana asked. She seemed to look menacing wearing duck pyjamas, even if she was holding a dagger in her hand. Alana gasped. Three people were on the floor and one had golden eyes. Golden!! No, he couldn't be. Could he?
"Liah, I think we have ta'veren on our floor, and one of them is the Car'a'carn." 'I seriously can't believe this has just happened. Three bloody ta'veren sitting on the floor. This simply can't be happening.' Alana thought, tracing the dragon tattoo that was curling up her arm. The next thing Alana knew, a spear, no a bloody sword blade on a bloody stick was pressed to her throat, along with a dozen other sharp instruments of death.
"Once I find a way out of this maze of blades, I swear you will die a long and painful suffering-filled death, bloody Matrim bloody Cauthon." Alana said, taking a guess as to who her captor was by the sword-on-a-stick.
"How in the Light do you know my name??" Mat asked, not releasing the network of blades that was around the girl's throat. She kind of looked like an Aiel.
"Mat, let the girl go. We might need their help."
"Rand al'Thor, Matrim Cauthon, and Perrin Goldeneyes. There is no way in bloody hell this is happening to me." Liah said, glaring at the person who had Alana surrounded by blades. She grabbed a large book from a nearby shelf and swung it with all her might onto his head, making him crumple like a piece of paper and freeing Alana from the blades.
"Alana, are you okay?" She asked her friend.
"Yeah, I don't have any permanent injuries. Though once Mat wakes up I'm going to beat his brains out with a rusty plastic Spork. Yes a bloody spork." Alana was back to her old self again, threatening people with various instruments of rusty plastic.
"I just hope my dad doesn't come home and find these guys on the floor. He'll probably shoot them, or think we've all gone crazy and commit us to the nearest Insane Asylum " Liah said, pointing at the three ta'veren. "We need to find a place to hide them. Maybe Selena can help." Alana smirked. Selena was a fellow Wheel of Time reader and looked like one of the Sea Folk. She lived with a theater troupe that acted out scenes from the books. They would leap at the chance to have them in the troupe.
"I think that's a fitting punishment for them. We'll need to get them different clothes so they'll blend in. Come to think of it you need to change too. Wearing a Birgitte costume isn't exactly the right course of action." Alana said, gathering a bundle of clothing and heading into the bathroom.
"Are you sure we should go through with this? Sending them off to Selena and all?" Liah asked, fiddling with one of the straps on her tank top.
"Yes. We can trust a fellow dragonsister not to blab about them." They both touched the dragon tattoos on their arms.
"I think we should get going now, Selena doesn't like people being late." Three people accompanied them; sticking out in the crowd, as they weren't the type you would normally see in the city. The three were talking amongst themselves.
"If we were sent here I wonder who else was." Rand said.
"I hope no Aes Sedai came with us." Mat said.
"Maybe Faile was transported here too." Perrin said.
"Maybe Elayne, Min and Avienda as well." Rand said.
"Hurry up!! We need to get to the theater before Selena's puppet show starts!!" Liah yelled, grabbing them by the collar of their shirts and dragging them back to Alana's car.
An updated version of OMGWTF?! Watch out for the fangirls!
I apologize for abandoning this story.