Heero, Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Wufei.

I can't stay here any longer, so I am leaving. I don't suppose you will mind, but I think you ought to know why.

I remember years ago, you moved next door, to check up on something, you never did tell me why. I was at the park, having escaped my relatives for a few hours. You five walked past, and despite hearing rumours about me, you saw me for what I was, a lonely child who knew no love. You came over, spoke to me, gave me my first taste of love.

Then, after a few months, you moved on. I was left heart-broken. I loved you, I knew that, even if I only knew you for a few months. Them two years before you came back was a nightmare. I have never told anyone this, not even you, but I tried to kill myself at least four times, I didn't want to, no I couldn't live without you.

Two years later, you turned up on the Dursley's doorstep, showing guardian papers, telling the Dursley's it they were to sign they would never have to see me again… they signed. I packed everything I owned, still not quite believing you were back.

You took me to a mansion nearby that you, Quatre, owned. I had never seen something so big. All five of you laughed at my shock.

We sort of fell into a routine. One of you would drive me to school every morning, then drive off to your work place. Some days you picked me up, but the days you didn't I would spend hours at the park, listening to songs on my iPod. When I finally got home you would ask me how my day had been and what friends I'd gone to that night.

I always replied 'fine', my heart however, was begging you to realize that I was not fine, you never did. One day, a Friday, I was at the park again and I saw all five of you.

By this time our relationship was a lot better than it had been, we were all together, but you always preferred each other to me, I could tell. I tried to hold back the pain, but it eventually caught up with me, that night in fact.

We were also having sex most nights, I couldn't call it making love, it wasn't making love. That had hurt, badly, still does actually.

Back to the park incident. I prayed you wouldn't recognize me, but you did. By the time we had got back I was panicking, it must have been obvious, but again, none of you realized. Heero, you yanked me up the stairs, then chucked me into the only chair in your bedroom, I had my own bedroom. Quatre, you told me not to move and to remain in the seat, in the tone of voice that you use to talk to other businessman, polite but distant. Now you had reduced my heart to a fragile mess, one more word, one more action could smash it.

So, guess what you did, you smashed it. All of you, you made love that night, it was obvious you had done it recently. You forgot me.

For the first time I ignored your orders. My emotions took over. I know though Quatre, you can feel peoples emotions, so how did you not feel mine, did you just ignore them? I remember telling myself to stop being selfish, nobody gets everything they want, I shouldn't be the one to split you up with petty jealousy.

I uncurled from the ball I had pulled myself into, trying to block out the sounds you were making, and the thoughts running amok through my mind. I stood up, and opened the door. That was the only reason you remembered me, wasn't it? The door creaked.

Trowa, you grabbed my wrist and spun me. Somehow, you all noticed me wince in pain. Duo, you must've understood why I was wincing, because you pulled up my sleeve, revealing scars, both new and old, all self-inflicted. I remember thinking to myself, how did you never notice when we had sex?

You all looked at me, shocked. I laughed bitterly. Heartbreak can change a person dramatically, didn't you know? You all apologized, promised never to leave me alone like that again. I believed you, I trusted you, I forgave you. And that night I snapped, sobbed out all of my thoughts, worries, you all listened, comforted me. Then you all made love to me for the first time in months. I also told you my deepest secret, the fact that I could never bare any children, due to what the Dursley's had done to me, you smiled distantly and hugged me, maybe I should have noticed but I wanted to pretend for a while longer.

That month or so was the best month of my life, you all made me feel perfect. I felt protected, I felt cherished, I felt beautiful, but mostly, I felt loved. The next morning you would still be there! I woke up warm and comfortable in your embrace.

I remember one day, we all went to the town, to get Quatre more clothes. Lots of men flirted with me, and you ignored it, but when a women flirted with Quatre, she ended up with a broken nose. That day even you realized something was wrong with me. That day was the day I started considering running away, and maybe I should have, it could have saved my heart.

This time when we went into town, and a male flirted with me, he also ended up with a broken nose, I must have been glowing for the rest of the day. You would also hold my hand, hug me, kiss me in public! If I had tried that before, you would all shrug me off coldly as if I was a random stranger.

After a month or so, you started treating me coldly again. Again you would shrug me off if I tried being affectionate. Again it was back to having sex not making love. The worst? It seemed like you were getting bored of me, like I was only a secret affair you were trying to keep secret. You fixed my heart, then broke it again. Why?

The last straw however was last night. When we had sex, none of you remembered me. You all cuddled up to each other, leaving me to curl up at the bottom of the bed like a pet and stare at you all, trying to contain my tears, at least till I had got out of the room.

I grabbed my clothes and got dressed, then walked out the room. This time though, none of you cared, you were all too wrapped up in each other to bother with me, the little girl who always needed protection.

I guess it was easy enough to save your colonies, strangers you never met, but one girls' heart was too much, right?

Wufei, you were right, girls, women, are weak. And here is your proof.

I can't stay here any longer, I can't watch you being happy without me. Yes, I know it is selfish to want you to myself, but I can not help it.

Please remember one thing, I love you and I always will.

Jasmine Potter