"Even the best fall down sometimes."
"Out of the doubt that fills my mind I somehow find you and I collide"
Collide by Howie Day
Hunter had long ago reluctantly acquiesced in the fact that trying to sway Shawn's favour was like trying to raise the dead. Unless he had a handwritten note from the Lord himself, changing his buddy's mind was as likely as seeing snow in July.
Usually he would stifle his disagreement, mute the harsh words of criticism assuming that Shawn would learn from his own mistakes.
But not this time.
Not when the details of Shawn's sordid deal had trickled through the wrestling grapevine. His blood bubbled and boiled with the frustration at Shawn selling his soul for the almighty dollar instead of turning to his friends for help.
He struggled to fathom how becoming Layfield's lackey was the preferable option to loaning money, felt a surge of annoyance at his friend's ill-fated pride. Shawn would become inferior to the smuggest bully on the roster rather than lower himself in the eyes of his friends and family by extending the hand of need.
Shawn's raspy tone filtered into the hallway, the southern croak threaded with fatigue. Even outside the locker room Hunter could sense the weight of the worries embedded in his friend's voice.
He pushed the door ajar, stepped into the room uncertainly. Shawn had been screening calls and refusing to speak to him all weekend, he doubted he'd take his showing up unannounced with good grace.
Hunter stood, shifted nervously as Shawn's conversation petered out at the sight of him.
"Hey Shawn"
The elder man glanced up swiftly, eyes aflame with guilt crested by the smouldering debris of resentment. He pursed lips into a thin line of determination. He didn't want Hunter here wallowing in his downfall, attempting to turn him into some charity case. Shawn Michaels wasn't about to take hand outs from anybody. He'd single-handedly clawed his way up the ladder of success, he'd slipped and plunged from the rungs alone and he intended to dust himself off and ascend unaided again.
"We need to talk"
Hunter's voice was soft but firm, sternness bred from concern and contempt at his friend's actions.
Shawn feigned ignorance, antipathy seeped from every pore. Why couldn't Hunter just let him be? He didn't want to have this conversation.
He could feel Hunter's upset and betrayal trailing his skin, coating him in a film of disgust and pity. He shuddered under the sliver of sympathy, rebuked its bitter touch.
"Just go!" he spat, swatting Hunter away furiously.
He sought the ground as Hunter remained motionless, unfazed by the clipped and hostile words spilling from his best friend's mouth.
"What are you doing?"
Shawn wanted to shrug at Hunter's bewilderment, wanted to leave him as lost and confused in the darkness as he was. If he thought for one second that Shawn knew what he was doing then he was sorely mistaken. The only thing he was certain of was that he wasn't about to let their friendship splinter and fragment under the mass of misfortune.
He wouldn't allow their friendship to be put under the stress of leader and follower. He still recalled 2002 with crystal clear clarity; could not bear to contemplate that they head down the path of enmity once more.
Denial and refusal raced through his mind, the yearning to maintain self-importance clouding all rationality. Dignity had priority over camaraderie in order to preserve it; even if Hunter refused to see it.
"Why didn't you come to me?"
Hunter pressed the matter, his voice bleeding hurt and treachery. For Shawn not to turn to him showed a lack of trust, and a lack of trust led him to believe that what he thought to be a friendship based on solid foundations was actually a crumbling mess of uncertainty breaking to pieces around them.
"I knew I could come to you, I knew you'd be there"
Shawn's shout was bittersweet, erasing Hunter's doubts about their friendship's strength swiftly.
He looked into navy eyes besmirched with tacit apologies, almonds of shame slovenly roved across the floor, reluctant to rise and meet whisky spheres of compassion.
He parroted his thoughts to the ground, informed the locker room tiles of his reasons for not approaching his best friend for help. Low and humbled, his words weaved their way to the floor, sparks of anger seethed through the humility as he desperately attempted to make Hunter conform to his viewpoint, to understand why he was doing what he was.
This deal stemmed from necessity not desire. He'd give anything not to be inferior to one of the most hated beings on Raw.
Except his friendship with Hunter.
That was the one thing he couldn't afford to lose. He could suffer the whispered sneers, the looks of disproval, he could stand being a sell-out and booed by the fans who had once adored him but he couldn't give up his best friend.
Hunter's fury at being sidestepped for reasons he didn't fully concur filled the air. Shawn felt the sense of doubt rising, like a drowning man he reached for his lifeline only to find it several feet away battling the current of pig headedness that was heaving within him.
"Just trust me alright?" he pleaded, "I know what I'm doing"
The words hung between them on a breathless appeal of insecurity. Shawn's statement was anything but confident, no matter how hard he battled to convince both Hunter and himself.
Hunter had tried to express his disgruntles countless times but to no avail. Shawn was determined to maintain his pride.
With a sigh Hunter decided to allow him that favour, to grant his one request.
"For your sake Shawn I hope you do"
The door clattered shut leaving Shawn standing alone, abandoned by demand he stood, Hunter's words echoing around him.
"Me too" he whispered softly, reservation flickering through his words.