Disclaimer: I do not own any Star Trek anything. Nothing. I also do not own the poem used in this chapter.

I cannot understand why I lay in bed and think of her, even when Nyota is at my side, but I do and I compare everything Nyota does to her. I do not believe that one is 'right' and one is 'wrong' as I make these comparisons but I feel my companion would find it most upsetting if she were to know that I did this.

I do not even realize I am doing it any more until I almost say one aloud. It is really quite simple things I think about when I find myself comparing. I run my fingers through Nyota's beautiful cascade of ebony hair and idly remember the feel of another's short springy curls. As I caress her deep coffee skin in a stolen moment alone while we walk I recall the pale golden hue of another woman. She senses my stray thoughts through the link created between our skin and I draw back suddenly.

"What was that?" she asks me. She was always much too good at reading my brief emotions.

"I'm not sure as to what you are inquiring about."

Her brown eyes stare up at me, I suddenly am overwhelmed by the vision of murky blue irises staring instead.

"There! You did it again, this glossed look came over you and I felt the strangest thing when we touched."

I shake my head, Am I really being that obvious? "I am not sure, I may be feeling unwell."

"Spock..." her voice trails off.

I will myself not to think of her voice. Of course telling myself not to think of something is futile and only forces my mind to think of such things with undeniable clarity.

She sat on the edge of a window sill, her odd stringed instrument in hand plucking it while singing, I listened in a completely captivated state. "I sang of leaves, of leaves of gold, and leaves of gold there grew.

Of wind I sang, a wind there came and in the branches blew..."

"Spock!"

I tried to focus only on the one infront of myself, "Yes?" She looked agitated and upset with me; I doubt her words will be kind.

"You need to go back to your quarters and rest, you aren't yourself." Her tone leaves no room for argument.

"Very well, do you wish for me to accompany you at a later hour?"

"Only if you want," the comment is crisp and mildly demanding.

I automatically interpret her words and process them into what human females actually mean with this statement, 'If you care about me you will be with me tonight.' I muse briefly to myself if 'Female, Human' could be added to my resume as languages I'm fluent in.

"Can I presume I will find you in your quarters at 1900 hours?" I see her face smooth into a smile; I do not need to read her thoughts to tell that she is pleased.

"Yes, I will be there, and if I have stepped out briefly I'm sure you can chat with my room mate for a few minutes." Her smile turns into a devilish grin.

I close my eyes for a second and then pinch the bridge of my nose in order to stop the oncoming headache I feel.

I ring the bell at Nyota's room and wait for admittance, the buzzer is pressed and I step inside. I do not see Nyota but her seductive Orion room mate is standing in the door way of the bathroom. 'Oh I thought it was... never mind make yourself at home.'

I sit on the edge of Nyota's bed while Gaila moves about the room in naught but a towel. I take a deep breath to calm myself and realize my folly quickly as her pheromones permeate my olfactory sense. She understands the sway she now has over me and moves to her bed next to me. She bends to fetch something under the bed and I see her amazing green legs leading up towards the bottom of the towel. Even in my half hallucinating state of mind I found myself going 'Well Gaila's legs are longer but her legs always seemed perfectly proportional.' I cannot even begin to describe how dumbstruck I feel that the thought of this female has broken even the spell of an Orion temptress.

'Spock, do you need any thing while you wait?' She asks me with the most perfect smile as she sits a little too close on the bed to me for propriety.

'No, I am fine, however I do believe I will look for Nyota in the linguistics labs instead.'

Gaila gives me one last smoldering look before unlocking the door and allowing me to leave.

I remembered in an instant and I bring myself back to the present just as swiftly as the headache ebbs. "You are correct, I should rest, I will find you at the agreed upon time."

She looks at me with such affection, the corner of her mouth quirking up just enough to indicate her happiness. "Go then, and feel better."

I turn and embrace her before leaving, my index and middle finger finding hers as my Vulcan expression of how I feel but do not say.

We part without additional words I walk quickly across campus, returning to the secluded faculty building I live in. Mostly full of the older, more settled down professors I find the quiet evening hours much to my liking. I enter the pass code and proceed into the compound like building. Elaborate water displays and lush gardens meant for the comfort and relaxation of residents meant only that envious students were more likely to attempt to defeat the purpose of the high walls constructed about the perimeter. I walk up the stone path to the building entrance and find no stray students before proceeding up to the fourth floor.

I enter my rooms and find nothing amiss and head directly to my bedroom, neglecting to remove both jacket and shoes to immediately lie in bed. The cool fabric runs across my skin catching slightly as I turn, reminding me I need to shave.

I throw off my heavy clothes, scattering them about in a messy fashion. I agonize over the disorder I create while at the same I console myself that no one will ever know of this indiscretion. I lean back in my bed, willing abstract thoughts from my mind as I remember my days at the academy when I myself was a cadet.

First actual chapter should be up sometime soon.