Musical Saphael
Song: (Loosely based on) Jolene by Dolly Parton
Summery: Raphael is aware of Simon's feelings for Clary, despite them being in a relationship.
Universe: Could be either.
Warnings: Angst, sorta.
Other pairings: One-sided Climon.
There was no doubt in Raphael's mind that Simon loved him. It showed in every kiss, every hug, every whisper or gasp or scream of his name. Raphael knew Simon loved him. It was obvious but Raphael also knew that Simon loved Clary. Of course he did, Simon had loved her before he even really knew what love was. Raphael wasn't sure he could compete with Clary. With her red hair, pale skin, light eyes and angel blood. What was he, a bloodsucking monster, in comparison to a shadowhunter who fought all kinds of monsters, like him, to protect the worldwoworld
Raphael looked down at Simon, sleeping next to him peacefully,blissfully. What if Clary did fall in love with Simon one day? What if she finally realised that the love of her life was disguised as her best friend all along? Raphael wasn't sure he could survive losing Simon. He wanted his lover to be happy, of course he did but losing Simon, just like he lost everyone else he ever cared about... It would tear him in half. Hurt more than the sunlight, more than a cross, more than a stack to a heart that no longer beats.
Anything that made Simon happy was worth any pain it caused but that didn't stop Rzaphael from wanting Simon to chose him over her. Was it too much to ask that the one he loved, loved him over everyone else? Maybe, it was selfish and possibly wishful thinking. Raphael thoguht often about talking to Clary, confronting her and demanding to know if she had any feelings for Simon romantically. Even if they were small because small emotions grow.
It worked for him, didn't it? He also thought about talking to Simon about his insecurities and even giving him the classic 'it's her or me' decision but that wasn't the kind of boyfriend Raphael wanted to be. He was also afraid Simon wouldn't choose him. Instead of voicing his worries he settled on just tightening his grip on Simon's waist when they were around her. As far as Raphael could tell, Simon hadn't noticed. He's have mentioned something otherwise, right?
Raphael pulled Simon a little closer, his eyes moving to the ceiling. He pushed all the thoughts of Simon leaving away as he felt the other stir beside him.
"What are you thinking about?" Simon asks, his voice quiet as if he was afraid of disturbing the peace.
Raphael turned to him, a slight smile on his face. "Nothing, Amor" he whispered back.
Sure, maybe Clary would love Simon back one day but as Simon reached up to kiss Raphael, Raphael was sure in that moment that Simon's feelings for him were stronger than his feelings for Clary.