King Buggs Bunny sat at the large round table with the rest of his Looney Toons cohorts aswell as his negro basketball playing friends. There was tension for Buggs' kingdom, as he knew they were at a large risk of going extinct. The threat had been apparent to Buggs, but he ignored it for many years. Every day, the crabs were getting more intelligent. Not only that, but they were getting stronger too. Buggs knew that something must be done, so he called together his negro friends. "We have to bring in Shrek," they all agreed. "He's our only hope."
It was a grand suggestion, but Shrek the helpful ogre lived very far away. It would be a tiring journey for Spencer and his African accomplices. Not to mention, the team was very hard to keep under control. There was one African in particular that was quite irritating, even to his own team, but they kept him around anyhow. One player was a bit quiet, but he was Buggs' favorite. The man's name was Shaquille O'Neil. While he was taller than the average man, he exhibited great traits of meekness and kindness. He had long enough legs and was physically able enough that he knew for a fact he could reach Shrek. So, Shaq began on his journey to find Shrek, the key to stopping this crab war dead in its tracks.
When Shrek saw Shaq, he bellowed out a roar. "You're in my swamp now!" Shrek had a large smile on his face and charged at Shaq, picked him up, and gave him a great big hug. "Ello, me old boy! I haven't seen you in a while!" At first, Shaq was confused, but after a few more words he realized the familiarity in Shrek's voice and his eyes lit up with joy!
"Shrek, my brotha'! How've ya been?"
Shrek and Shaq were old friends dating way back to their days in college together. When Shrek couldn't make it on the basketball team with Shaq, he had decided to move out to his swamp in isolation. Shaq and Shrek set out together on their grand journey to help Buggs stop the crab war before it could happen. When they made it, they were immediately encountered by the grand crabs. Shrek began firing his onion launcher at the crustaceans, inciting a battle. Shaq pulled out his basketballs and began bouncing them on the crab guard's heads. This just irritated them instead of inflicting damage, so Shaq backed off.
"Lemme take it from here!" yelled Shrek in a courageous voice. He pulled out his onion pistols and began firing rounds at the crabs. The crabs fled for their lives. They just couldn't handle the onion. Shaq thanked Shrek for his courageous attitude and the two were closer than they had started off that day. Shrek was happy for his new friend. They looked at eachother, and embraced in a dramatic bro hug with firm pats on each other's backs.
They were the saviors of Buggs' kingdom, and he awarded them with mansions of gold. "I can not accept this, laddeh," said Shrek. "I must return to my swamp." A single tear rolled down Shaq's cheek, and he knew it was time to say goodbye to his old friend. They shared one more bro hug before departing. "WAIT!" Screamed Shrek. "I give you... my onion launcher." Shaq was grateful, and this gift brought a smile to Shaq's face coupled with more tears.
"I got somethin' for you too, my brotha'", said Shaq. He pulled out a bottle of his special Goldbond lotion and gave it to Shrek.
"Thanks, laddeh! You and I both know this will go to good use!" Shrek gave a little wink to Shaq, and they shook hands and went their separate ways sad that they had to leave each other again, but all the more rich in spirit from the experience.