Author's Note: I was reading reviews on my Since U Been Gone and RiseofaRebellion (being the lovely bundle of awesomeness that she is), said I should make a longer version, where Shirley and Milly take their plan a step further…mwahahaha (that was my evil laugh)…

Lelouch: oh no. she's at it again! *hides under covers*

Me: Lulu, there better not be anyone under those covers with you…

Anywayz, as I was saying, I didn't feel like starting a new story just for this and I already had an idea to do a collection of one-shots. This is just the first one. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I only own Code Geass in my dizziest daydreams. But Suzaku will be mine foe-evah! (forever). Just don't tell Sunrise. Shh…

It was just an ordinary day for Lelouch Lamperouge. He slept through all his classes, ignored the constant cries of "kyaa!" every time he was spotted by one of his fangirls, and watched the world with his usual expression of boredom and indifference.

Little did he know, his day was going to become a lot more interesting and not in a good way.

He froze just outside the Student Council Room. His eyebrow was twitching profusely and uncontrollably. At this moment, he hoped to God, to anyone really, that he was going insane. He literally prayed that his ears were deceiving him. There was no way this was happening. But it was.

Since U Been Gone was blasting out of the room. Kelly Clarkson's voice was like an omen, a warning of things to come. It was a musical beacon calling out, saying Turn around, RUN AWAY! Do anything; just get the hell away from here!!!

Lelouch was clearly a hypocrite. For someone who constantly chastised Suzaku for being so dumb, Lelouch could be pretty damn stupid. Instead of walking away like any perfectly normal, sane person would've done, he went in the room anyway!

The Student Council Room was super dark; it was kinda eerie. As he made his way towards the table in the center of the room, he heard what sounded like muffled laughter. That was impossible, though. Right?

Lelouch heard a burst of anticipatory laughter. Suddenly, before he had an opportunity to open his mouth and scream, a hand snaked out from underneath the table and wrapped around his ankle. He was yanked down with surprising strength. The hand around his leg was…delicate. Almost like that of a female.

He was surprised to Milly and Shirley. Well, he was surprised to see Shirley anyway. Milly's presence wasn't that much of a shock.

"Milly, what the hell—"He was cut off by the sound of someone entering the room.

Suzaku poked his head into the room. "Lelouch? Are you in here?"

Lelouch's eyes widened. As much as he wanted to scream at Suzaku to save him, he couldn't. He loved the boy too much to let him suffer the same fate. His sacrifice was quite romantic and inspirational. His story would be told in an award-winning Oscar-worthy film. Lelouch would be portrayed by some younger, purple-eyed version of Jake Gyllenhall. Or a pale, more awesome version of Zac Efron (or not).

The only problem was that they would pick some lame new-comer to portray Suzaku. Or worse yet…Rob Pattinson. No. Lelouch would not live, could not survive, if they picked Rob Pattinson to play his sweet, beautiful Suzaku.

"Suzaku! No, don't!" Lelouch shouted as the door knob began to turn. Suddenly it stopped turning.

"What?"

Lelouch opened his mouth to say more but Milly covered his mouth as Shirley sat on his chest.

"Come on in, Suzaku," Milly said in a poor imitation of Lelouch's voice. "Everything's fine."

"Well…alright!"

Suzaku entered the room.

Lelouch rolled his eyes. He couldn't believe he fell for someone so gullible! Suzaku was a soldier for crying out loud! Didn't they train him to be prepared for traps like these? Suzaku was so trusting and saw the best in everyone. Of course, that was part of the reason Lelouch fell for him in the first place. He was so sweet and strong and gorgeous and amazing and…wait! He needed to focus on the situation at hand. He was being held hostage by two evil, hormonal teenage girls.

"Why is it so dark in here, Lulu?" Suzaku asked, clearly confused.

"Oh, Zuzu," Milly continued in here faux-lulu voice, "I have night-vision goggles. I wanted to try them out."

"Why are you here all alone, Lulu?"

"Oh, Suzaku, that makes it easier to get you alone."

"Well, Lulu, why are you listening to Kelly Clarkson?"

"The better to get you in the mood, Zuzu."

Apparently, Suzaku wasn't that naïve because he knew exactly what Milly/Lelouch meant by "get you in the mood." Suzaku paused and blushed, uncomfortably.

Meanwhile, under the table (and under Shirley's butt), Lelouch vi Britannia was slowly dying a thousand deaths. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Milly and Shirley were going to have hell to pay when this was over.

"Get me in the mood for what, exactly?" Suzaku asked, afraid of the answer.

Milly took another deep breath…

"Get you in the mood to suck my-"

"Whoa, Lulu! What the hell?!" Suzaku shouted. "I thought this fanfic was rated T!"

"Oh, my bad, Zaku," Milly replied in her awful Lulu-impersonation. "I forgot."

Wait a minute, Suzaku thought. Lulu would never care about the rating. He would say whatever the hell he wanted. Something's up.

"You know, Lelouch. It would be really nice if you would come out now," Suzaku used his most pleading voice. "I haven't seen you all day and I really missed you. I mean, don't you want to kiss me? I know you like it when run my hands down your body and touch your—"

Suzaku's words were cut off by a small puddle of blood trickling out from beneath the table. Suzaku ducked his head beneath the table.

"Ah ha!" he shouted. Milly, Shirley and Lelouch were cupping their noses, trying to suppress the flow of blood.

"You know we're not gonna be able to let you escape now, right?" Milly said as she reached up and grabbed tissues from the table above them.

"Wha—Ah!" Suzaku shouted as Shirley pulled him underneath the table. Milly produced a roll of duct tape and heavy duty twine from her jacket pocket.

"Sorry, you guys, but this is for your own good."

Lelouch failed to understand how exactly tying their hands behind their backs and taping their mouths shut was for their own good. As he struggled with the twine, his annoyance grew. Milly was going to pay when this was over.

Suzaku and Lelouch had been placed back-to-back, which Lelouch also didn't see the point of. It was nothing but unnecessary.

Suddenly, Kallen entered the room. "Why the hell is it so dark in here? And whose bright idea was it to listen to Kelly Clarkson?"

Suzaku and Lelouch tried to shout through the tape but all that came out were muffled screams. Of course, they were loud enough for Kallen to here; she just chose to ignore them for the time being.

"Oh, Suzaku. Harder!" Milly said in her terrible Lelouch voice.

"Lelouch! Ahh…" Shirley said, trying her hand at Suzaku's voice. She was actually pretty good. Suzaku wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing, though.

Kallen had to repress her laughter but it was hard. "Uh, Milly? Shirley? Are you guys trying to trick me into believing it's Suzaku and Lelouch making those noises. Nice try but only an idiot would fall for that."

Lelouch snorted. Finally, someone who agrees with him.

Suzaku and Lelouch tried to shout. Kallen rolled her eyes in annoyance. They obviously wanted her attention. She sighed and dragged the two hostages out from beneath the table and ripped the tape off their mouths. She then used her Swiss Army knife to cut away the super twine of doom.

Milly and Shirley crawled out from underneath the table.

"I think you should apologize to them."

"Sorry." Milly and Shirley mumbled the word.

Suzaku said "Apology accepted" and smiled at them. Lelouch, on the other hand, merely nodded and muttered a few words under his breath.

"I just have one question though," Lelouch said. "When the two of you were pretending to be Suzaku and me, you implied that Suzaku was on top. Why is that?"

Silence…Then everyone burst out laughing and Lelouch received four looks that basically said "Do you really have to ask?"

A/N: Haha! I'm done with my first story in my collection of one-shots! Yayz! You know the drill review and you get a cupcake; no review and you get explosive corn muffinz. On to the next story! I think Euphemia will be involved…hmmz…

Euphy: Yay! I get to be in the next story?! Will Zuzu-chan be there?

Me: Er, yeah! Of course! I love Suzaku! *glomps*

Suzaku: *hugs Stephie-chan back* Awwz! I lovez you, too!

Euphy: *shoots fire from eyes* Suzaku is mine! But… I suppose we can share.

Me: M 'kay. (lie--has no intention of sharing Suzaku with anyone…but lulu, anywayz)