Title: One Shining Moment
Rating: K
Characters: Hatter, Alice/Hatter
Spoilers: Parts 1 & 2
Summary: The world goes on, but you're stuck in slow-motion. There's a lot left to clean up still, but everyone who turns to you only ends up disappointed. How could you possibly help others? You can't even help yourself. Sometimes you wonder if this is what it is like to give up.
A/N: This was an exercise in writing for me. No dialog, no names, and second-person narrative. That said, sorry if it sucks!
One Shining Moment
For one shining moment she's there. The next, she's gone and you're left wondering when exactly, on this crazy adventure, you lost your nerve.
You were a part of overthrowing the Queen of Hearts and keeping hundreds of refugees alive; all because you've learned to play both sides of the field. You've lied, cheated and bartered your way through Wonderland's darkest days without a care. But this time, when it was something that really mattered, you were completely lost. Couldn't say a word because telling the truth isn't something that you do.
You've gotten too good at, and spent entirely too much time, lying. Maybe you're forgetting how to speak the truth at all.
To your right, the new King seems lost in thought with his eyes transfixed on the spot where just moments ago she stood. If you're honest with yourself, you'd have to say that you envy him. She loved him once. That might have changed over the course of the past couple days, but that doesn't change the fact that the feeling was there at one point. She'd come all the way to Wonderland to save him after all. If that isn't love, you don't know what is.
She might have been able to love you too. If you'd been honest.
The bumbling White Knight wants to chat—to celebrate no doubt—but you don't want to speak with him. He doesn't understand. He doesn't see that you're not happy about this all being over. Sure it means Wonderland is safe...that you don't have to keep risking your life for the resistance...but it also means she's really gone. So instead of joining in his mirth you shrug him off and make your escape.
The Tea Shop is empty and you don't think you've ever seen it this quiet; not even your shop manager is around—not that she ever made much noise anyways. But it's to be expected. The tea is gone and so are your patrons. You're out of business and yet somehow you don't care. It will be easy enough to rebuild. You can open a proper Tea Shop, do respectable business, and make a name for yourself that will mean something. But for now you have more important things on your mind.
You find the piece of paper right where you left it—tucked in a copy of that writer's book about your world. This is the real reason you knew she wasn't the girl of Legend: a crude drawing of that Oyster done years ago by your great grandfather. He thought that girl should be remembered, and this picture has been in your family ever since.
Sitting at your desk, you pull a blank sheet of paper out and hastily begin scribbling. You have to do this before the cruel sands of time wipe her visage from your memory. You're no portrait artist but, sitting back and admiring your handiwork, you decide it will do. She might not be of Legend, but she deserves to be remembered too.
Both papers go into the book and back on your shelf. Maybe you'll look at them again one day once the ache in your chest stops.
- - - - -
Minutes have turned into hours, hours have turned into days, and days have turned into weeks. You look in the mirror and notice that the bruises and scratches are gone; your last physical reminders that she was real. The psychological reminders, however—that dull ache around your heart and those five letters that have taken up residence in your soul—they've become your old friends.
The world goes on, but you're stuck in slow-motion. There's a lot left to clean up still, but everyone who turns to you only ends up disappointed. How could you possibly help others? You can't even help yourself. Sometimes you wonder if this is what it is like to give up.
On the four-week anniversary you visit the Looking Glass; dark and cold to the touch in its hibernation state. You wonder what ever happened to the Stone of Wonderland. Does the King still have it, or did he order it destroyed? Will they destroy the Glass one day? Completely separate the worlds?
It's that thought which causes something inside to snap and you find yourself out of control. You know that pounding on the cold glass isn't going to do anything and it certainly doesn't make you feel any better but you can't stop. You can feel the tears burning your eyes, and for the first time since you were twelve you don't care enough to stop them.
You don't even notice that you've got an audience until he speaks. He says that somehow, he knew you'd be here. He didn't imagine you'd be carrying on and taking your frustration out on the Looking Glass, but he knew he'd find you. For once you have to thank the King for something: bringing you back to your senses. You've never had an outburst like this, not even when you were a child. So you pull away from the Glass, straighten your hat and assure him you're fine.
You'd be embarrassed if you didn't suspect that he's hurting just as much. You use a quick, mumbled apology as means of goodbye while you head towards the door. It is his Looking Glass after all... It's only suited that it'd be his chosen place of mourning. You don't belong here.
But, oddly enough, you're not surprised when he calls you back. You are surprised, however, when in one hand he places a large envelope and in the other the Stone of Wonderland.
He asks you only two things. One: take the stone with you. There's only one person other than himself that he trusts with the ring and he knows you'll give it to her. Two: take care of her. That's all it takes to make up your mind for you.
You don't even have time to nod before the room is buzzing with scientists and the ring is snatched from your fingers to be placed in the Glass' power chamber. The once smooth mirror becomes fuzzy and begins to ripple as it hums back to life and the men go about preparing its timeline so you'll arrive shortly after she did.
As you stand in front of the primed mirror and take one last glance at what you're leaving behind you suddenly feel different; like a weight is being lifted. This is it: that one shining moment that you didn't even know you were waiting for.
- - - - -
You always hated physicians so being in the Oyster hospital isn't exactly your cup of tea. But she's here and so this is where you'll stay. They told you that you could go, she'll be fine, but a part of you doesn't believe them. Part of you knows that the silly little Oyster lying in bed just beyond those doors is more jeopardy-friendly than any of them will ever know. Part of you needs to protect her; to never let her out of your sight again.
When a woman approaches you, you're taken off guard. But after hearing her thanks you assume she must be the mother. It wasn't a problem, you assure her, and you were only doing what was right. She still can't thank you enough and you take advantage of her gratitude to request a visit with her daughter once the girl is home safe again.
After visiting hours are over you have nowhere to go. You wander the city for what seems like years before finally remembering the envelope you brought here with you. Inside you find an address, a key and some money. That Wonderland King of yours... Still taking care of his people even when they're not in the same dimension.
It's the longest night of your life even though you've got a roof over your head. You're still not with her and its killing you; to be so close and yet still so very far away. You only hope that she can forgive you for letting her walk away.
You let the hours tick by before allowing yourself to go to her house; no reason to seem overly anxious. Besides, she might not even be home yet so you take up watch from a building across the street. But when a car pulls up and there she is it takes the last ounce of strength you have not to run for her; you force yourself to wait a full half hour after she disappears inside before ringing her bell.
The mother is once again all smiles as she lets you into the apartment, calling for her daughter to come out. She really does seem like a lovely woman and you make note that you'll have to ask her name at some point. After all, it would only be polite. She calls again for the girl and suddenly there she is standing in the doorway.
You'd like to think that the shock on her face upon seeing you is that of pleasant surprise. When she throws herself into your arms you imagine that you were right; she even proclaims that she's happy to see you.
After that, there's only one logical course of action. Her lips are a taste of Heaven; stronger and purer than any emotional tea or Wonderland concoction. It's a taste of what is right. The reassurance that this is exactly where you belong.
And you know deep inside that it may never work out. You may be back in Wonderland inside of a month. But for now, in this shining moment, she's in your arms. She's here. And, if you're honest with yourself, that's where you like her best.