A/N: yay! Ifiguredouthowtouploadstorieswithoutword! finally. Becausemycom. beingdownwasreallystartingtobotherme. AndthisisanideaIhadwhenlisteningtothebeautifulsong "TakeTheseWings". Andifthenarratorisn'tclearandneitheristhepersonhe/sheistalkingto, thatisintended. Itdoesbecomeclearersoonerbeforeexplainingitattheend. ProbablykindaOOCthough.
Disclaimer: IdonotownDannyPhantomorthesong "TakeTheseWings" TheyareownedbyButchHartmanandDonBesigrespectively.
You need to fly. You need to take to the sky and spread your wings. And you need to know. How you just have to understand that wonderful feeling that comes with flying. To be free on the wind. To soar across the black, inky, starry night. God knows that what I've always wanted. To be free. And god forbid I ever get it. Because even if you have some means of flying, even if you're always jetting across the sky. It's not really flying. Flying is different.
Because you aren't feeling it. All your flight are long, hard and ruthless chases. Fighting a loosing battle. And I'm going to tell you this right now, that what you are doing is absolutely pointless. Because you don't know how to fly. And you'll never keep up with your goal because they know how to fly. They fly because it's the only way that they can find peace in this hell hole. In this limbo.
You need to feel the wind rush past as you leave your worries and troubles behind you. It's been a while since I last did that. I've been trapped. In my own mind. In myself. I can't fly anymore. Because I've forgotten. And I'll never remember again. Because I've left my past so far behind me that I can't retrace those steps I've taken. I can't follow the path I've taken again. My innocence is lost and I can't wash the blood that stains my hands.
So forget me. Forget I ever existed. Forget everything and anything I've done. And even if you can't forgive at least do me one last favor. Don't lose yourself too. Because if you don't forget me, if you keep going on living like that, you're going to end up broken too. As broken as I am now. I'll tell you from experience, once everything you know and love have shattered, there is no way to put yourself back together.
So let go and drop everything. Because for some odd reason I still can't comprehend, everything youknow and love is me. So before it's too late, before your life shatters, let me go. And learn to take these new found wings and fly. Fly off into the distance and never come back. Leave your old life behind because it's not there anymore. Everything is different and changed. Thrown out of balance.
I remember long ago. When life still made sense. I loved you. I love you and I couldn't let go of you. And when everything else broke, you were the one person in my life I could trust. But I trusted you too much. I just couldn't hold on anymore. I could already feel my fingers slipping when you left. And it was for the best.
I couldn't depend on you forever. I couldn't hold on. I was already balanced precariously on the edge. Falling into the stormy waters below. So when you left, it was the final straw. It was done. So I fell. I fell down into the dark. And I never came back up. And really, on that day, I died. I died a long time ago. Everything I ever stood for was gone, so how could I stay?
Then you were gone too. And you were different. I hated you. I despised you with every fiber of my being. Because in my eyes, you killed the you I once knew. Where once a sweet, tough and sarcastic girl once stood a cold hearted killer remained. And I hated all of it. Because everything was gone, starting from the place it all started.
I was so far down the line that everything I saw, everything I heard and felt reminded me of the fact that what was me was gone. And so it needed to go down. It needed to be gone too. You were fighting with a passion I once saw on my own face. You were fighting for everything and anything that stood for you. That held you in place. And then I pitied you. I pitied you for believing in what was gone. And for believing in what couldn't possibly remain. And I fought you.
But that was then. Now, now I feel different. And I now see that though everything is gone. Though everything I stood for left me, the only thing I can do about it stand my ground and hold my head high. I could face the change with pride because I know that what was me would never be back. So I advise you. Please. Forget me and fly off to the potential I know you have.
Take these wings
And learn to fly
To the highest mountain in the sky
Have you ever had what you wanted totally and completely taken away from you? To be so close to that future yet so far away? I know you do. Because when everything is taken away from you, what you have left is blind rage. And I saw that blind rage on your face. The need to take vengeance. The need to destroy.
I saw on you that day so long ago and I was afraid. Because you what you might do. Because of how much you wanted to end me. One that day you changed and so did I. Ever since then you've been looking at me through a red curtain. You are only seeing the things that fuel that rage. And you never saw the truth, you never saw what was there. Simply because you did not want to.
I remember how you used to shout my name. How you shouted it with the bitter taste of medicine. And you would scream and hate me. And I remember how you whispered my name too. How you whispered it with that tender joy. And you would caress and love me. And it was so different that I didn't know what to think of you.
But years later, on another fateful day, this time, you lost far more. And I saw your face again that day. Your face did not look enraged and hatred did not cover your gaze. But your face no longer pronounced the love and care did not show in your stare. Neither love nor hate but only cold indifference. And you looked as if you were waking from a dream.
Those two stares, one confused and contemplating while one hurt and longing, they both broke me. And I was never the same again either. And whilst you woke up from that dream I feel asleep in mine. I saw you change and leave and you didn't take me with you. And as that red curtain lifted from your vision it went down over mine.
You fought me. But you fought for the right reasons this time. You fought for the town and for the people. You weren't selfish anymore. But that merely enraged me further. Where was the girl I knew? Who were you now? And I had no trouble fighting you back with everything I had and over time, I grew to hate the new you.
And you had always hated me. Because in your eyes, I had changed. And I was different. I was not fit to take the place of who I used to be. And our fights began. And they were so different from what they used to be. From me running and you shooting to straight out cold ruthlessness. We were both fighting for the kill. You had closed your eyes again. Because you didn't know me anymore. While I hated that you changed I knew it was still you. But now, now you didn't know who I was anymore. In your eyes, I had not only changed but had become a whole different person.
You were wrong. Because I was still the same inside. You couldn't see that and you still can't. We'll never be the same people we used to be. But locked up, deep within my soul, is that person. The hero. He's struggling to get out. But I won't let him. I can't. Because I-I can't live with that. The crushing guilt, the deep sorrow. It's easier to cause others pain.
So don't tell me that you know me. Don't tell me that you knew the me I used to be. Because you never did. You never understood me. You'll never know what it's like to be hated and loved simultaneously by people who you love. To have the only people who care about you change their minds by one change of you, and people who hated your guts to love and revere you by that same change. Only three people loved all of me, and that changed because they left me. And then no one loved me.
So don't pretend that you could possibly know what I've gone through. If you knew...well, you would see why I do what I do. So don't pretend that you can see what's truly there, because only people who have experienced true pain will ever be able to see. And you're not quite there yet. Sure you've got the ripped away from youthful innocence part down and the lost home and family part too, but people still love you. To experience true pain, no one can be there for you. So plus shut up and star seeing properly.
Take these eyes
And learn to see
All the things so dear to me
So now do you see my point of view? Do you know what's here in my heart? Do you still think I'm evil? How many times do I have to stress the point? And I know you haven't changed your mind. You still think I'm the big bad guy. You don't see the real me. And I know that you can't. I do think that I actually absorbed some of Jazz's pysco-babble, because I know that while you hate me so much and I really am flattered) you can't see it.
Why not you ask? Well that is the million dollar question. But here it is, it's because you won't let yourself. Yeah that's right, you don't want to be wrong. Ha, talk about self centered. Anyways, you feel so traumatized by the past events that you would simply fallapart if you lost everything familiar to you. And after they all died then well, nothing but me, your old rivalry was the same. So you used that information to keep yourself together. To stop yourself from falling prey to PTSD.
So am I right? I can't say the same for me. So are you really counting on me of all people to hold yourself together? Ha! Now that's just hilarious. But truth be told, I think that this think goes two ways. Of course, I'm way too far gone to be saved but I am still sort of leaning on you. And what I have to say to that?
EW!
I'm sorry. You don't disgust me that much. But I really just don't like depending on other people. Considering how great it did me last time. But please, don't try to wrap your mind around it. Because you won't be able to. In fact, do me a favor and just stop thinking. And instead of following logic and reasoning, follow your heart.
Because when you open your eyes to the real world, you'll see what you missed. You'll be able to filter through the red and replace it with bright clarity. And when you look back, then think. Look to see what was there and then make your decision. Maybe when you are able to see properly, you'll change. And you'll finally see my point. Maybe you'll finally understand me.
Go back in time and revisit old memories. Don't be afraid to let yourself fall because someone will be there to catch you. Don't be afraid of change because like it or not it happens all the time. It's happening now. I embraced the change. Look where I am now.
Wait no.
That came out wrong considering I'm not in the best of spots at the moment. But follow your heart and see where it takes you.
Somewhere, deep inside you, is a little girl. Waiting and waiting to be able to roam about and sing to the world. To let that unique melody that is you flow and dance in the wind. You need to let other people know you and see you. They need to distinguish you, distinguish the bright crimson red out of that sea of grey. And most of all, you need to see yourself.
You need to sing, to let out your thoughts and your feelings from the past decade float on the wind. Let the wind carry them away until they disappear. Disappear off into the sunset where you'll never have to see them anymore. Because me? I know you want to get rid of those memories. Because when you do, you'll be free to hate me again.
Because when you still have memories of who I used to be. When you can still see me. I know you can't hate who I am now. Because like it or not, in your heart, where your soul and where you stay, you know it's me. So when you think of me, whispering your name. When you think of me, telling you I don't want to hurt you, you can't do anything.
And it leaves you so vulnerable. And you hate that. Am I right, or am I right? See, I do know you. I know you better than you think. And I'm telling you this now, when you sing, you'll finally be able to forget. And you'll finally be able to let go of all those hurtful memories that I left behind. Then, you'll be able to hate me with peace. And of the real me? Then you'll be left with pleasant voices, a calm breeze and sweet memories.
Take this song
And learn to sing
Fill your voice with all the joys of spring
So do you understand now? Do you know why I'm telling you all this? If you still don't, then I'll tell you. Because I don't want to condemn you to my fate. I don't want you to suffer the same way I did. It's not right to be able to prevent something like this from happening to someone but ignore it.
Yeah, yeah, I know you're freaked out, I mean me? Care about what's right? Yep. I am going crazy. But really, you need to see that you can let go. And that you can move on. Because at the rate your going now, when you die, you'll turn into a ghost. Because you're just that obsessed with me.
And when you turn into a ghost, you'll turn into the one thing that you swore you would hate. The one thing that you dedicated your whole life as of now to hunt down. You will become your worse enemy. And being a ghost? It ain't pretty. You'll be more obsessive, you'll rely on fear and negative emotions to keep going. You'll need to go back to the ghost zone. Humans will hate you.
Do you really want a life like that? Because the afterlife? Baby that's no fun at all. I never got the chance to move on. I was always a ghost. I was always this way. And I knew right away what kind of life a ghost has. I knew right off how ghosts behave and act. I was able to fight it for a while but...eventually, I lost my humanity.
And I bet you're really confused now aren't you? And...Oh God I should've told you about this earlier. I should've told you when you actually might have understood. When you might have listened. But...better late than never right? Hehe. Okay here goes...Danny Fenton and Danny Phantom were one and the same.
Yes. That's right. That was me. Your best friend. A long time ago. And as much as I don't want to admit it, we really were the same person. It just. It felt like something was missing for all those years. And even though Vlad filled in the gap left over from getting my humanity painfully ripped out...there was still something missing. Something wasn't right.
But I know what it is now. Because I never died. I was only created, mutated, I am essentially half of Danny Fenton. And because I am not really a real ghost per say, I still missed the human parts. And I was weak without being human. It was being human that kept me sane all those years. It was not being human that eventually drove me to insanity.
And now, now that I've calmed down and thought about my life, I've realized one thing. It really sucked. Even when I was losing sleep and my grades were slipping, that was a better life than the life I've lived for ten years. And I think it was because my friends were there. My family was there. I had something to actually live for. My life was actually worth living back then.
But now? Now I want to warn you. I need you to let go. Because when you die, you want to be able to move on. You want to be able to go to that place beyond. You don't want to be tied to this plane of existence while still not being able to see your friends and family. You don't want to die if you are going to be condemned to this fate.
And you should be afraid. Because you're not singing yet. The rage and the fear still clouds your vision. And you have to hear me out because soon, soon, it's going to be too late. And I want you to be free. I want you to fly. So now that I've taught you to fly, it's time for you to teach yourself something. It's time for you to teach your heart to soar along with you.
Take this heart
And set it free
Let it fly
Let it fly
Let it fly
Beyond the sea
And I don't even know why I'm doing this anymore. Why should I help you when you won't help yourself? Why should I be kind to you when you've never been kind to me? And I'm feeling lost. Because you aren't even here. You're off somewhere on Earth doing god knows what and I'm here in the ghost zone.
We're not even in the same dimension! And I have no idea why I'm even bothering. And I don't know why I'm trying. Because I know you're not going to change. Even if you can hear me right now, you're not going to change. And I'm trying for nothing again. And I'm putting too much faith in you. Faith you don't even deserve.
Because you're just so selfish. And you have to be right all the time. And no one else other than you. So I must be wrong. I must be out of my mind if I'm trying to convince you that everything you've ever worked for your whole life is wrong.
Why? Why did Clockwork tell me to do this stupid 'talk' the meddling old fool? Why do I have to suffer? Because this, it's tearing me apart. Because I care. I want you to change. I want you to stay human. I don't want you to turn into a monster. And it disgusts me. Because I can't care. Because I'm different now. How can I be so different yet still hold some of that affection I felt for you?
But...I think I understand now. This was never about you was it? This was never about you changing. It was about finding me. It was about digging apart all those layers of hate and anger and finding me again. And I think I found him. And oh God, the goody-two-shoes old me. The resident 'hero'. And it makes me want to gag.
But I do suppose that he has shown up in me again during this talk now didn't he? I don't remember being this...gentle and kind before. So am I changing back? Am I going to be the 'hero' again? But I don't want to. And I don't think I'm supposed to. But...if it's fated to happen I guess then...well I guess then it's inevitable isn't it.
So glad we could 'talk'. But don't even think for a second that this changes out relationship. Even if I do care for you in a way that makes me want to hurl I still hate your guts. I still value your identity as the Red Huntress and I still want to kill you. So don't think I'm going soft. For now. I'm still here. I still haven't changed that much. And I guess that this wasn't a completewaste of time. Yeah...
It was getting kind of boring in this thermos anyways.