Just Gonna Stand There And Watch Me Burn?
Summary: Because what are prom dates for if she can't go with the guy she likes?
Pairings: Eirtae/Gree, Luminara/Gree, mentioned Barriss/Cody, Obitine, & Aayla/Kit
If you want to know where I pulled Eirtae/Gree from, it's from my really shitty SW HS AU abbreviated as "HAU".
"I can set you up with someone," Barriss offers.
"I don't want your pity," Luminara snaps, sounding like the uptight bitch most of the school population thinks she is. "Or a pity date, for that matter. It's prom, Barriss! Why would I go with someone I don't like and who doesn't like me?"
Her cousin sighs. "Nara, there are plenty of guys who like you."
"Like whom?"
"What about Cody?"
She looks incredulously at the other girl. "Barriss, he's your date."
"Yes, but I'm a freshman, and I'll have my own senior prom in three years."
"Let Cody take you to his senior prom."
"What about Kit?"
"He has Aayla."
"Plo?"
"Barriss, you've only suggested three people, but that's three people too many."
They sit in silence for a few minutes, Luminara tapping her fingers on the table.
"Nara, you should ask someone to the prom then."
She snorts. Like anyone would say yes. She's not exactly likeable. The nerdy best friend of the head cheerleader and her football star boyfriend isn't exactly a catch. Besides, the only guy she'd ever want to ask to prom is said football star boyfriend/ best friend.
Of course, Barriss doesn't know any of this. (Luminara would rather die before she let on anything about it.)
"It's a valid suggestion!"
"Yes, it is," she admits.
"Then ask someone!"
"What's all this about asking?" Gree asks, sliding in smoothly across from her. Eirtaé settles in against his side.
Damn. Or, actually, yay! Her best friends!
She tries to ignore the stirring in her chest that comes from just looking at Gree.
"I'm telling Nara that she should just ask a guy to the prom!"
She looks down at her tray, embarrassed. Why is her cousin pointing out her ineptness at attracting the opposite sex?
"I'll just go alone, Barriss," Luminara says softly. "It's okay."
She can feel Eirtaé's blue eyes looking at her pityingly. This is exactly what she didn't want to happen. "Oh, sweetheart," the blonde coos. "I'll fix you up with someone, okay?"
She nods at her tray.
"Nobody's asked you to prom?" Gree asks, drawing her attention.
Great. He's going to ask that question. "No," she mumbles.
"Really? But look at you!"
She knows what he sees. Hair pulled back into a strict bun, zero makeup, and a holier-than-thou expression that everyone hates. It's not a surprise that nobody's asked her, especially with her sparkling personality.
"Shut up, Gree," she says, face still directed at her tray.
Everyone tells Luminara that Mace is her male duplicate. Therefore, Taé has decided that they're soulmates. Or, in this situation, perfect prom dates.
"So how did Eirtaé get you to agree to this?" she asks, flipping through her chemistry textbook. "I thought you were a loner."
"Well, I didn't think that you of all people were desperate enough to agree to this either, but I guess we were both wrong," he shoots back. "And if you must know, she blackmailed me."
"Really?" Luminara laughs. "What can the honor roll student possibly be blackmailed for?"
"Why don't you ask yourself what you could be blackmailed for, fellow honor roll student?" His gaze makes her uncomfortable, but she refuses to back down. She is Luminara Unduli, class-A bitch, after all.
She purses her lips and turns back to the textbook. "My cousin told Taé that I didn't have a date, she cooed and cawed, and then set me up with you."
"Let me guess- the only person you want to go to prom with is her boyfriend."
She sighs. Subtlety is not her specialty, and Windu is shrewd. It's a miracle that neither of her best friends have ever noticed anything. "That's right."
"Oh, Unduli." Mace doesn't sigh, he exhales. "You can do better."
"So, who did Taé set you up with?" Gree asks.
"Hello to you too." She shuts her textbook closed. After Mace's rebuke, they sat in silence and did homework for half an hour. Then he left, and her best friend took his spot. "Why?"
"She said she'd tell me after school, but then some student council meeting came up and I figured I'd ask you yourself." He smiles brilliantly (her heart does not falter, it does not). "So, who is it?"
"Mace Windu."
"The self-righteous king of assholes?" Gree splutters. "Nara! Did you call it off?"
"Self-righteous king of assholes?" she repeats. What? "Gree, he's perfectly decent!"
"Are you kidding me? You could do so much better than him, and Taé knows it! She knows how much of an asshole Windu is, why did she set you up with him?"
"You know, this whole 'you can do better' thing? I've been hearing it way too much lately. Plus, Mace isn't that bad! He's the male version of me, how hateable can he be?"
"He is not the male version of you!" He runs a hand through his hair, obviously agitated.
"Why are you getting so worked up?" Luminara demands. "He's the only date I'm going to get, okay? If he'd been an asshole to me, I would've said 'screw this, go fuck yourself'. Look, Gree, it's not that bad."
"I'm getting worked up because I'm your friend-" The tiny creature in her chest twists viciously.. "And you deserve better!"
"Who the fuck is going to go out with me?" she practically screams. "Stop denying the truth, Fett! I am a bitch, and he is an asshole, and couples don't get better than that! Leave it alone!"
Gree glares at her, breathing through his nose. Then he slams his hand down on the table. "I am not denying the truth. I will not leave it alone-"
She slaps him, hard.
Her car is a Dodge Charger SRT8. Black, like my soul, she thinks miserably, sliding into the driver's seat. She doesn't like fighting. Yes, she can argue her ass off (as captain of the debate team, it's a requirement), but she hates fighting. She's never fought with Gree, not in the four years that she's known him. Does that say something about their friendship?
Luminara leans her head against the steering wheel and undoes her bun, letting her hair fall down her back. Her head thanks her immediately.
God, she hates prom.
There's a tapping noise coming from somewhere, so she jerks her head up. Barriss is smiling sheepishly at her from the passenger window. Must have missed her bus, she thinks.
She rolls down the window. "Want a ride?"
"Would you mind?" her cousin asks.
"No." She would've liked some alone time, but Barriss is excellent at being quiet when Luminara would like her to be.
Her cousin opens the door and sits down in the passenger seat. "Thanks, Nara."
"You're welcome," she replies, starting up the engine.
The combination of Barriss' breathing and the car rumbling under her eventually calms her down. The dragon in her chest settles down a little, but it's still there.
"Gree's face has a handprint on it," her cousin says quietly.
"It's mine." Is she okay with having this talk with Barriss?
Well, she supposes, it's better than having it with Taé.
"Why?"
"He wouldn't shut up." Then something occurs to her. "Mace is a decent guy for a prom date, right?"
"He's nice if you're nice," Barriss answers.
She'll take that for an answer. "Gree got all worked up about him and got mad at me. Then I got mad at him."
"Gree couldn't get mad at you," her cousin says. "Not if he tried."
She laughs. "Are you kidding me? I'm pretty sure I got him angry."
"I don't know what you two argued about, but he wasn't angry at you, Nara. You can't get angry at the person you love."
Her hands tighten on the steering wheel. "Don't say that kind of shit, Barriss."
Her cousin turns her I'm-fucking-determined eyes at her. They're wide and blue and open and Luminara can't escape. "Well, guess what? I'm pretty sure Gree loves you."
"Riiight. And how did you deduce that, Sherlock Holmes?"
There's a moment where none of them say anything and Barriss assesses her. "You love him, don't you?"
"I can't love anybody, I'm too damn young!" She makes a sharp right into her cousin's street.
"Well, Nara, he loves you back."
"I hate him!" she yells, pressing her horn. Luckily, nobody's around.
"You love him!" Barriss yells right back. "I know you do!"
"He's got a girlfriend!"
"You've been pining after him for years probably!"
"His girlfriend's my best friend!"
"His girlfriend's a lying, cheating bitch!"
They've stopped outside Barriss' house. "Get out!" she screams. "Get out!"
"With pleasure," her cousin snaps, and slams the door behind her.
"I didn't think that you of all people were desperate enough to agree to this."
"The self-righteous king of assholes?"
"Leave it alone!"
"I will not leave it alone!"
"You've been pining after him for years probably!"
"You love him! I know you do!"
"His girlfriend's a lying, cheating bitch!"
"Get out!"
She doesn't sleep.
Barriss seems to have forgotten the fight in the car. Luminara knows better than that, but she prefers to play along.
Gree enters the cafeteria, Taé hanging on his arm (the thing in her chest pulls on her heart and stomach), and she pushes away her tray.
"Barriss, you said Taé was a lying, cheating female dog. Is she actually cheating on Gree?"
Out of the corner of her eye, her cousin nods emphatically. "Yes, she is. I have pictures."
Pictures. She's sickened by her best friend, but the thing in her chest leaps up hopefully, saying You could have him. "I don't want to see."
"All right."
It would make great blackmail material, her mind says. You could have him, the dragon in her chest says. "Actually, would you send them to me?"
Her cousin looks at her, blue eyes piercing. "Yes, sure."
"Nara."
She stops rifling through her purse for her car keys. "Gree."
He sighs. "About yesterday-"
"I'm sorry for slapping you," she says, then goes back to her search. If luck has it, that'll be the end of the conversation.
"Don't be sorry, Nara. I'm sorry for everything. I was wrong, and I was harassing you, and you were telling me to stop, and I didn't listen. So... I'm sorry."
She purses her lips. Luck is never on her side.
"Nara?"
Her next words are directed at her car. "I'm going to do something that will cancel out your apology."
"What-"
She pulls her phone out of her purse. "Gree, I'm going to send you an email. You are not going to open it until I pull out of the parking lot. Got it?"
"I- yeah, um-"
"Good." She selects the pictures that Barriss sent her, sends the email, and looks up at her best friend. The dragon rears up at their proximity.
"There you go." She slides into her car, locking the door firmly behind her, and speeds away from the school.
Her phone rings after a few minutes, but she ignores it. She has a firm policy of no calling or texting while driving, and teenage crises aren't going to change that.
When she reaches her house, she doesn't get out of her car. Instead, Luminara pulls out her phone and listens to a voicemail from Gree.
"What the fuck, Nara? Are these real? If this is a joke, I'm going to fucking kill you, I don't fucking care if you're my best friend. If these are real... well then fuck you."
"That was shorter than I expected," she says to herself, then dials his number.
"Fuck you, Nara!"
The dragon in her chest shrivels and sends out pangs of guilt.
"What kind of a sick joke is this?"
He's so angry. "It's not a joke," she answers firmly.
"Not-" He scoffs on the other end. "I asked Taé if these were real, and she said that they were fake!"
"Of course she'd say they're fake, she doesn't want to lose you."
"You know, I said I was sorry for yesterday. You don't have to be a bitch and get back at me by doing this."
Her breath catches. Gree has never, ever called her that before, not in their four years here. Not when she brushed him off in freshman year again and again, not in sophomore year when she angsted because she realized she liked him, not in junior year where she went through a drugs-and-cigarettes phase... not until now.
She can feel tears rise in her eyes, and the dragon expands in her chest until she's sure her heart is going to burst. "Oh, God," she murmurs, voice breaking.
"That better have been some sort of apology, you bitch."
Her eyes burn.
She hangs up.
"Barriss?" Her voice cracks. "Barriss?"
"Nara?"
"I- I sent him the pictures, and then he got mad, and then he called me a bitch, and now I can't stop crying. And I hate myself, and I hate him, but I hate myself even more!" She has to stop speaking because it's all too much. Her chest feels like it's about to explode, she's crying, her brain fucking hurts.
"Gree?" her cousin asks gently.
She lets out a sob and then clasps her hand over her mouth. Stupid teenage crises.
"You did the right thing, Nara. Where are you?"
"At home," she chokes out.
"I'm heading there now, okay?" Barriss' voice is reassuring. "I'll be there in fifteen minutes. Are you in your car?"
"Parked in the driveway."
"Wait for me, okay?"
"Okay," she whispers. The dragon deflates, because Barriss is going to make sure she's all right.
Her cousin hangs up.
When her phone flashes again, she doesn't bother checking caller ID and accepts the call. It's got to be Barriss, saying that she's going to be there in five minutes.
"Where did you get those pictures?"
Of course, of course it would be Taé. She flattens her fingers against her mouth, determined not to say anything.
"Luminara?"
Her chest inflates again, painful and horrible.
"Where did you get those pictures?" Taé repeats the question slowly, like Luminara's an imbecile. Which she is, but she prefers not to think of herself that way.
"Answer me!"
Silence.
"You've ruined our relationship! Fuck you, you bitch!"
Wow, that makes a grand total of two best friends calling her that today. Great.
She hangs up.
Barriss appears with a carton of ice cream and shares it with her while the dragon in her chest sets her heart on fire.
The next day, both Taé and Gree pointedly ignore her.
"What did you do?" Mace asks.
She twirls the pencil in her hand, her eyes burning again. I am not going to cry. I am not going to cry. "Something stupid."
"I gathered." He snorts.
"I'm not going to tell you."
"Eirtaé and Gree have broken up."
Her head snaps up. "Already?" I thought Taé lied to Gree about the pictures.
"So you did have something to do with it," he says triumphantly.
The burning intensifies, even as the dragon rears up happily in her chest. She nods slowly.
Mace suddenly looks thoughtful. "Why?"
"Why?" Luminara parrots it back to him, surprised. "What do you mean 'why'?"
"I thought you were determined to be the pining best friend that never makes a move."
"Well, I was, and then I just... I just sent him the pictures and ran away."
"You? Ran away?" he asks incredulously.
"Yes, because I'm a cowardly teenage girl."
He rolls his eyes. "Well, face your problems, Luminara. Don't run away."
"Thanks for the advice," she snips. "I'm sure it'll be useful."
Her best friends continue to ignore her.
"Vote me for prom queen!" Eirtaé is passing out flyers to everyone, freshmen and seniors alike. "Vote me for prom queen!"
Luminara snatches a flyer from a passing junior, ignoring his protests. Taé smiles prettily from the paper underneath giant red letters commanding the reader to vote her as prom queen. At the bottom even more red letters add to vote Gree for prom king.
And here I was thinking that they broke up.
She's not surprised by this development, but does Taé really think that she and Gree can hold a candle to Satine and Obi-Wan? In this school, the head cheerleader and star football player don't outweigh the senior class president plus the student body president.
"Feeling left out?" someone asks.
She tears her gaze away from the paper. To her surprise, it's Obi-Wan. Usually he's making a break for the band room at this time, but instead he's talking to her in no apparent rush.
"Left out? Interesting choice of words." She racks through everything she's done this year that might possibly warrant Obi-Wan talking to her. (Well, she did insult Satine recently, but she's his ex and it happened last month.)
He shrugs, and Luminara suddenly finds herself missing him. They'd been good friends a few years ago, but then Obi-Wan started taking on so many other activities and disappeared from her life, only to reappear on a higher rung of the social ladder. Their conversations were no longer about the latest movie coming out but instead if he could borrow a pencil.
She doesn't resent him for it. If she had herself as a friend, she'd want to ditch too.
He says, "They're your best friends, and obviously there can't be two prom queens, so..."
"I'm not sure if they consider me their best friend," she replies. "I've been making some mistakes recently."
"Everything can be fixed." Obi-Wan's innate faith in the goodness of people used to be annoying, but now she just smiles sadly.
"You're always so positive, Obi-Wan."
"Everything can be fixed," he repeats. "No matter how far you've screwed things up."
His eyes bore into her, fierce and determined, and she gets the feeling that he knows.
Luminara leans against her car and sighs, tired for some stupid reason. Without Taé and Gree to talk to, the number of friends she has is ridiculously close to zero. She can't talk to anyone because her tone always sounds condescending, and nobody wants to talk to her anyways.
"Nara?"
Oh, fuck it.
"Gree," she sighs. The dragon rises up slowly.
"Taé and I broke up," he says.
"I know."
"Can I ask you a question?"
"You already did," she snarks. The dragon raises its head hopefully.
"Another one, I mean."
"Go ahead." She sighs for the third time in five minutes.
"Why'd you do it? Send me the pictures, I mean?"
Goddammit. "I..." She's speechless, which is nice. "You deserve better. You're my best friend, you know?"
Gree's expression suddenly turns into something else, but a second later it's back to thoughtfulness. "But Taé's your friend too."
Luminara thinks back to freshman year, when Taé was a sweet girl who wanted nothing more than to have a friend. She's not that girl anymore, hasn't been for a long time, but that was the girl that Nara became best friends with. "She hasn't been my friend for a while."
Then she remembers that she should be getting home and opens the car door to shove her stuff in.
"Hey!" Gree catches her wrist. (Her heart speeds up.) "We're not done yet!"
"What else do we have to say?" she asks, not making a move to force his hand off.
His expression turns positively scandalized. "A lot, Nara! Like the fact that I shouldn't have called you a bitch, and that I've been ignoring you for the past week, and that I want to go to prom with you!"
Shit shit shit. She can feel her eyes widen, and now she yanks her wrist out of his grasp and slams the car door behind her.
"What are you doing?" he yells.
"You don't want to go to prom with me," she says, the dragon expanding. "You still have feelings for Taé. Go with her. Be her prom king."
"Is that what has you freaked out all of a sudden?" He laughs, but it's a bitter sound. "I don't want to be her prom king, Nara. I don't have feelings for her, haven't for a while. Now, will you please, please go to prom with me?"
Everything can be fixed. Obi-Wan's voice echoes through her mind. Her chest feels like it's going to explode.
She puts the car in reverse and drives away.
The dragon in her chest burns her lungs, her heart, her eyes, and she cries all the way home.
"Barriss, I've done something stupid," she sobs into the phone. "Gree asked me to go to prom with him and I love him and he thinks he doesn't have feelings for Eirtaé anymore but I know he does! And I hate everything because I'm so stupid and I left him in the parking lot and just ran away because that's all I'm good at, running away from my problems. That's what I'm good at and I'm stupid and I'm horrible and I want to say yes to him so badly but I'm just stupid that way. Please help me, Barriss, I don't know what to do and I'm sitting here in my car breaking down like the pathetic, lovesick fool I am, and-" She has to break off because otherwise she's going to choke.
"Luminara." That's not her cousin's voice.
"Mace?" her voice cracks.
"Luminara Unduli, you may be a pathetic, lovesick fool, but you are also a class-A bitch who has her shit together. So you are going to listen to me and follow along with my instructions. Got it?"
"Y-Yes?"
"Don't make that sound like a question." His voice is commanding.
She wipes away a tear. "Yes. I'll do it."
"Good. First of all, sit up straight."
She straightens up.
"Now stop crying."
She does exactly that.
"Text Gree. Tell him 'yes, I'll go to prom with you'."
Luminara takes in a shaky breath and opens her text messages. Her fingers seem to move on their own, and in no time she's sent off the message.
"I sent the message."
"Good. Now, hang up, go inside your house, and wait for a reply."
She opens the car door, steps out, and hangs up.
The next morning, at the exact instant she steps out of her car, Gree asks, "Were you serious about what you said yesterday?"
"Yes, I'll go to prom with you," Luminara says.
He looks at her long and hard. "What changed your mind?"
"I'm not going to be the pathetic, lovesick fool anymore. I'll take you as you are, as you always have been, and I'll be happy."
Gree doesn't quite seem to understand, but he nods.
Taé doesn't become prom queen.
Luminara slow dances with Gree.
It's a happy ending, she supposes. Or at least, the happiest one that she's going to get.
fin
R&R? ~jedikhaleesi