Disclaimer: The Sound of Music characters belong to 20th Century Fox.

When I was a child, I used to love writing stories about Maria (who is one of my all-time heroines) and the Captain, little realising that this was "fanfiction"! These days I usually write sci-fi fic, but wanted to return to my roots for a little while :)

The story begins after the Reverend Mother tells Maria that she must return to the Von Trapp home. I have tried to mix the portrayal of Maria's life in the film with her real-life background.

Chapter One

A Place To Belong

Still in her postulant attire, Maria stood by the window of a small and humble bedroom in Nonnberg Abbey, and looked out at her beloved mountain. As a little girl, its breathtaking beauty and song had offered a refuge from an otherwise cold and unkind world, and as a young woman it had been a place of retreat when she was feeling lost and alone. A part of her wished she could flee there now, instead of being stuck here at this terrible crossroads in her life. She longed to hear the comforting music of the hills, longed to be embraced by the mountain's majesty, and for a moment, just for a moment, feel like she belonged. Never had she really belonged anywhere in her entire life, never had she had a place she could call her home. Always she had been an outsider, an intruder, and for as long as she could remember had lived with loneliness.

Climb every mountain until you find your dream, the Reverend Mother had said, but she dared not let herself have a dream anymore. It was difficult to believe that anything good could ever happen to her. She lived only for the moment, taking joy in the joys of the present, expecting nothing from the future. Her escape from the world was into the glorious realm of music, not into dreams.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door and Maria made her way over to it. When she opened the door, she found that her visitor was Sister Margaretta. In her hands she was holding the pretty green floral dress that Maria had seen the new Postulant wear earlier.

"Hello, Maria," the friendly nun smiled. "The Reverend Mother told me that you're leaving us again and I thought you might like this dress. It should fit you perfectly as our new postulant is almost exactly your weight and height."

Maria took the offered dress with a sad smile. "Thank you, Sister Margaretta."

The smile on the nun's face faded when she saw how sad Maria looked. "You look troubled, Maria. Would you like to talk or to pray?"

"No," Maria answered quietly. "But thank you..."

"Are you worried about returning to the Von Trapp family?"

Maria hesitated, but then nodded. "The Reverend Mother says that I must but...I don't know if I'm strong enough. When I was with her I felt that I was, but now... To see the Captain again, to see the Baroness...I feel like I would rather die."

"I think you do need to talk," Sister Margaretta said gently. "Why don't I come in for a bit?"

Again Maria hestitated, but then she nodded. "All right."

Maria held open the door as Sister Margaretta entered the room and then closed it when she was safely inside.

"This really is a pretty dress," Maria said, putting it down on her narrow bed. "As I must go back, I may aswell have a nice dress."

"You don't have to tell me anything that you don't want to tell me," Sister Margaretta began, "but would I be right in thinking that only half of you doesn't want to go back?"

Maria stilled at those words and was a moment in answering. "I'm afraid."

"Of what?"

"I don't know exactly. Of the Captain...of myself...what I feel..." She looked up at Sister Margaretta. "I never wanted any of this. I never wanted to go to his house to begin with and I never wanted..." She stopped, bit her lip.

"Never wanted what?"

"I never wanted to care for them..."

Sister Margaretta stepped closer. "By that, do you really mean the Captain?"

Maria nodded. "I don't know what to do, what is to become of me. The Reverend mother says that I must go back, that I must find out if he cares for me too...the Baroness said he did you see, that he was in love with me...but I don't know if I can. I don't even know if I want too. I want things to go back to how they were. I want to be a postulant again, I want to feel I belong, that I have a home. I don't want to be out in the world again, lost and alone. The Reverend Mother says that it's God's will for me to leave, but it feels like...it feels like God is rejecting me just like everyone else has rejected me my whole life."

"God isn't rejecting you, Maria," Sister Margaretta said kindly. "He's guiding you to a place He wants you to be."

Infinite longing filled Maria's eyes. "Do you really believe that?"

"Yes I do. I believe you are destined to be Baroness Von Trapp."

Tears welled in Maria's eyes. "But is it really possible he could love me?" No one had ever loved her. It was difficult to believe someone could.

Sister Margaretta closed the gap between them and put her hand on Maria's arm. "Of course it's possible, Maria. Of course it is. You're kind, gentle, caring and light up a room when you enter it."

A tear ran down Maria's cheek. "But he's such a wonderful man and I...What can I offer?"

"Your love. It's the greatest gift that one person can give another. And, from what I've heard, it's a gift this man is very much in need of." She put her hand to Maria's pale cheek. "And remember, true love knows no fear. Put your life in God's hands, follow where He is leading, and you'll find where you belong, Maria. I promise."

END OF CHAPTER ONE