Before the Final Farewell
disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, they are all solely Rumiko Takahashi's. Also a note, near the end, with Kagura's death scene, the phrases were taken straight from the manga, because I wanted to show that that's what they actually said. Everything before and after her death scene is made up by me.
The scent had come to him so suddenly, he almost doubted himself, almost. It was hidden amidst a flurry of millions of other nightly scents, but he was sure he had caught the scent of the the demoness Kagura, the Wind Witch, and it was consumed in the odor of Naraku's shouki. She did smell like the wind, like the land and the air and sea altogether, as well as something...else. He stopped for a moment to catch the scent again, and Jaken absentmindedly smashed into his Lord's lower right leg, resulting in a lightning fast pop to his head. Behind them, Rin chuckled a bit, accustomed to the constant abuse of Master Jaken by Lord Sesshoumaru. She was riding atop Ah-Un sideways and happily swinging her small legs back and forth.
"Wh-what is it sir?" Jaken asked hesitantly, looking up at the demon Lord.
He did not answer, and instead tilted his head a bit to catch the wind and what direction it was coming from. Northeast. Already the stars were beginning to fade as the promised morning awakened. Sesshoumaru changed the direction he had previously been walking in and headed towards the scent he had caught from the wind.
Not bothering to turn around he said to Jaken, "Wait here, and take care of Rin."
He was alarmed at what the other scent was, it had been Kagura's blood. As soon as he was out of sight from Jaken and Rin, Sesshoumaru began to fly, all the while following Kagura's scent. He knew she was dying, as if every scent was a message and each passing moment inched her closer to death.
He flew high up, so that the fading moon shone a silver path to light his way. He didn't know why he wanted to go to her, but she had proven herself to be his ally on many occasions, and her loyalty to him was something he could not ignore. He had to be with her before she left this world, and perhaps there was something he could do to help her. It was the honorable thing to do.
The entire time, Sesshoumaru's face remained motionless, his smooth face unmarred by any expressions. Yet inside his mind, his thoughts were of the woman of the wind, she who claimed to be master of the very force he was riding upon to get to her.
Rin pouted as she watched Sesshoumaru's back grow smaller and smaller, until she could no longer see him over the horizon. She was always a bit sad when he left, but she smiled to herself, knowing that he always returned when he said he would. He hadn't actually said he would return, but he did tell them to wait, and so this meant he would come back. She began humming a childish tune that she had made up, adding lyrics to it from her life like she always did.
"Again I stay and wait
With Master Jaken
For the return of my Lord
Sesshoumaru-sama"
She frowned, knowing that it did not rhyme. She would have to make up another verse for it later.
Jaken had been moping about the entire time, upset at being left behind as his master journeyed on. Lord Sesshoumaru could have needed his aid, or support, but here he was, stuck with the job of babysitting Rin yet again. What allegiance did Lord Sesshoumaru owe this human child anyway? Jaken always wondered why she was allowed to come along, but he would never question his Lord.
"Rin! Stop singing!" Jaken wailed miserably.
"I'm sorry Master Jaken, do you not like my voice?" the young girl asked innocently.
"Your voice is fine, it's your singing I can't stand!" replied the irritated little imp.
"Alright then, Master Jaken, I shall talk instead," she reasoned cheerfully. Jaken groaned a bit, but sat himself down, because he knew he would be hearing one of her long rants now. However, the subject she chose this time was quite different from anything she had previously spoken about before.
"I wonder who Lord Sesshoumaru loves," Rin began, more to herself than to Jaken. The little green demon gasped audibly and said, "Rin! Why do you have such thoughts about our Lord? He does not need to love! That is for the weak."
The girl paid him no mind. In fact she was now completely ignoring him, absorbed in her own thoughts. She thought about all the women she had seen associated with Lord Sesshoumaru. There were the two mikos, Kikyo-dono and Kagome-dono, and that demon-slayer, Sango-dono. Rin also recalled the dead Princess Sara, who had, herself, fallen in love with Lord Sesshoumaru. Finally, she remembered the demoness Kagura as well. Of all the women, Princess Sara had been the most beautiful, Rin thought, but Lord Sesshoumaru could not love her, she had been a human. This left Rin with two possibilities, the dead miko and the demoness. True, Lord Sesshoumaru had encountered the miko many times, and each time he had left her alive.
Rin smiled to herself. She had known the answer to her question before she had asked it. Sesshoumaru-sama loved Kagura-dono, the demoness of the wind. Although she was only a young girl, Rin was a girl, and she recognized affection when she saw it. She remembered the first time she had seen Kagura-dono. She had flown in from the night sky on a large feather. Rin wondered what it was like to ride one. Kagura-dono had asked Sesshoumaru-sama for help in defeating Naraku, offering Sesshoumaru some shikon shards to strengthen him. With celerity, Sesshoumaru-sama had refused the shards and his aid. He told Kagura-dono that if she were a truly great demon, worthy of his respect, she would defeat Naraku by herself. Rin had been used to her Lord speaking so strictly to others, which was why she never asked favors of him. However, Kagura-dono didn't leave without having the final word. She had seemed flustered and angry and flew away saying, "You call yourself a man!" Rin was shocked at the lady's audacity, but when she turned to look at Sesshoumaru-sama, he was grinning, just slightly so that it would have been unnoticeable if she hadn't been so close to him. Was he...amused?
Rin realized that he had been amused, because no person, let alone a woman, had ever spoken to him in such a way before. Although Kagura-dono respected Sesshoumaru-sama, she obviously did not fear him as others did. This made Sesshoumaru-sama grin, he had found a person willing to stand up to him, and he had let her live for it. Rin had known this for a long time. She began having thoughts of the two demons getting married one day and raising her, like a real family. Though these were only the foolish ramblings of an innocent child, they were, unbenknowst to her, valid.
The young girl had been especially excited when she heard Kagura-dono praise Sesshoumaru-sama. She had called him the strongest, unmatched. Jaken later told the young girl that it had just been blatant flattery, a ploy to get Sesshoumaru-sama to fight Naraku again by appealing to his ego, but it had not worked.
Rin thought differently. She thought it meant that Kagura-dono also liked Sesshoumaru-sama, because she had been complimenting him. Rin also noticed that whenever Kagura left, Sesshoumaru-sama would stare after her in the sky until she was gone. He made no show to hide this, for he was too proud. Sometimes, Rin thought, Sesshoumaru-sama was very obvious about his emotions, though people just did not know how to read the signs he gave.
Rin walked around Ah-Un and began to pick flowers for Sesshoumaru-sama's return, all the while thinking about how perfect Kagura-dono was for Sesshoumaru-sama. She was a demoness, she was strong and beautiful, and she was not afraid to stand up to Sesshoumaru-sama. Rin liked Kagura-dono a lot, especially since she flew in a large feather.
Jaken had been watching the girl the whole time, and her little face had gone through a slew of emotions the entire hour he had been guarding her. He sighed and looked up at the sky, wondering where his lord had gone.
His sensitive nose caught the scent of a field of flowers before he could see it. Sesshoumaru-sama was certain that Kagura was there. He landed softly, like a whisper. He began walking towards where her scent was strongest, the blood in the air was intoxicating, but the flowers were even more so. He did not walk far until he spotted her, collapsed on the ground, her life spilling out of her, a body expiring. She seemed to be in deep thought, a pained, lonely expression on her face. He did not approach her.
Once, he saw her look up to the sky and close her eyes, as if longing to be in it, to be the with the wind again, free. She remained like that for the longest time, as if she believed she could really fly at that moment, but then her neck craned downwards and her silky hair became a veil across her face as she stared at the ground. Kagura was dying.
Sesshoumaru-sama saw her body trembling, as if it would break at any moment, or disperse into the air, like fine dust in the wind. She looked so fragile and broken, though she made not a sound throughout her suffering. Sesshoumaru-sama finally decided to step away from the shadows of the surrounding trees and approach her.
His footsteps were silent, so she did not realize that he was there, that he had always been there. Yet for some reason, she suddenly looked up, and her eyes widened in surprise. He could hear her beating heart beat just a bit faster. She looked flustered again, amazed at finding herself in another's company when she had thought she was alone. He stared at her, expressionless as ever. His eyes were sad, though not pitying. When she didn't speak, he said, "I came following the scent of Naraku's shouki," as if to justify his reasons for being there. He waited, patiently, for her to say something, and he even became a bit agitated and nervous from her silence. Perhaps he should not have come.
He continued to stare at her, and had almost decided to turn around and leave when she suddenly chuckled and said, "Naraku isn't here." It seemed as if she were laughing at herself, and then she said quietly, "You'll be disappointed," but it was in her usual sultry tone, as if she knew what his reaction would be. She continued to look at the flowers in the ground as he said, "I knew that it was you."
Sesshoumaru-sama saw her crimson eyes grow wide again in surprise. She looked up at him, questioningly, the feelings in her heart etched on her face. When he didn't speak again, her head nodded forward, her dark bangs covering her eyes, "I...see..." she murmured. She seemed to be thinking to herself now, though Sesshoumaru-sama could not see her expression. He wanted to know how she felt about his presence and whether or not it was welcome.
She looked like she was about to speak again, but suddenly she convulsed and shouki began pouring out from her chest as well as her back, a new bursting of her body. Sesshoumaru's fist tightened around Tenseiga and he thought, Tenseiga is not able to save her..her body was deteriorating, so he could not restore a soul when the body was dysfunctional. Also, Kagura did not possess a soul, and therefore could not be saved by his hand.
He merely murmured softly, "...Are you going?" He almost flushed at how scared his voice sounded. Kagura merely smiled beneath him and said in her casual language and voice, "Yea, it's fine."
Somewhere nearby Sesshoumaru-sama heard his young brother and his friends arrive, though he had smelled them a while ago.
Kagura's flesh was now blowing away in the soft breeze that had come and she looked up at Sesshoumaru to give him one final smile, as if to say something she could not speak with words. In her mind she thought, "In the end...I was with you." And though she did not speak these words, Sesshoumaru-sama knew what she had meant, and his eyes softened just a bit. He began to smile for her as well, though she suddenly burst from the shouki emanating from her body, sending soft petals dancing everywhere.
It was by this time that Inuyasha and his group had arrived. They had witnessed Kagura's death, out of breath and grief-stricken. Sesshoumaru quickly let his smile drop, there was no one to see it anymore. He felt a strong gust of wind lift his long silver hair, and saw a feather escape Kagura's hair before she completely vanished. The wind continued to strike him, it hit him hard, hugging him, pulling him, and almost caressing him. Through it all he felt her presence, she was all around him.
He heard Kagome and Kohaku muttering to themselves and began to walk away, but behind him he heard a low growl. "Hold it Sesshoumaru!" shouted his half-brother. Sesshoumaru-sama paused for but a moment, in respect for the woman who had just died, and turned his head slightly to look at Inuyasha. "Did Kagura..." he began hesitantly, almost unable to get the words out, "was she suffering?" he finally whispered.
Sesshoumaru-sama lifted his beautiful face up towards the sky and everyone else did the same, noticing the white feather in the air, still aloft. She had become the wind she loved so dearly, the very freedom she longed for all her life. Sesshoumaru-sama turned again and while walking away he said, "She was smiling."
When he reached the edge of the meadow, Sesshoumaru took one last sniff of the place, deciding that he would forever remember this smell, for her memory. Then he began to fly, carried by the same wind that had just carried Kagura's body away. He suddenly felt something warm near him, on his lips. It was so fleeting and soft that he was not sure if it had happened. Then he smiled slightly so that his lips were curved. It had been the wind.