Chapter one: Those who matter, don't mind
The full moon rose above the village of Hogsmeade and a shrill howl was heard from the Shrieking Shack making the villagers quite uncomfortable… Back at Hogwarts, a young Gryffindor boy named Peter, sat up in his bed and looked around the dormitory clutching his wand. James was asleep with his glasses askew and a fluttering object in his hand. In the next bed, Sirius was snoring quietly. Peter turned… Remus' bed was empty and neatly tucked in. This was not the first time Peter has noticed his friend's absence I'll talk to him in the morning… and with that thought, the boy fell into a troubled sleep…
The next morning though, Peter almost forgot about his concern, far too busy helping himself to porridge and talking with his comrades.
"Hey Tristan" yelled James across the table, "Did we have homework for transfiguration?"
"Yeah, a foot long essay on Animagi" replied the boy showing his rolled up scroll.
"Ah crap! I forgot! Rem, can I borrow yours, just this last time?" James begged.
Remus looked up from his plate and shrugged. Did his friend take advantage of him? He didn't like to think of it that way. After all he didn't want James to get into trouble so he stuffed a few more pieces of bacon in his mouth and nodded. Relief could be read in James' dark eyes.
"Thanks mate, you're a real lifesaver"
Remus smiled despite himself: he cherished their happiness too much to ever refuse a favor. Peter suddenly looked up and realized how tiered his friend looked and remembered his night-time ponderings.
"Hey, you weren't in the dormitory last night…" he whispered. Remus looked around the table; Peter's inquiry went unnoticed.
"Umm… Yes, well, I – I was working late and fell asleep in the common room!" He said looking a bit uncomfortable but happy with himself nevertheless. Of core last night, he hasn't even been near the common room; he was as usual, at this time of month in the Shrieking shack, on one of his monthly strolls as he liked to call them.
Later that day, in transfiguration, Professor McGonagall sent Remus to the hospital wing because of his sick appearance. So Remus dragged himself thru the empty hallways wanting nothing more than the comfort of the warm hospital bed. As he walked in the nurse shook her head knowingly muttering
"Lupin, Lupin… No sleep again dear?"
Without waiting for answer or questioning further, she gave him a sleeping potion. Remus slid under the covers and accepted the goblet from her hands.
"Thank you Mrs. Laurence"
"It's nothing dear, it's nothing. I wish I could do more"
He smiled at the plump little woman, what a kind and loving heart she had! With that thought his head sank into the pillow, his eyes closed slowly and all his worries drifted away.
When Remus awoke it was dark outside the window but he could see the lamp on his night-table turned on and he thought he could hear murmurs. Remus turned his head to look around but ever so carefully so that his awake would come unnoticed. There at the foot of his bed were to black haired figures and another one on the neighbor bed.
"Shiesh... Who would want to use phoenix droppings for a simple headache even if it dose have healing powers"
"Quit reading the damn ingredients, will you? I'm serious! We've all noticed he's never been very well… last year I thought it was nerves of first years, I mean, we've all had a time adapting…"
"You two? If I didn't know better you two were born in Hogwarts! Adapting! You knew were everything was on the second week! I still don't…"
"Ok, ok! That's not the point! We're talking about Remus here" a sigh was heard "he's been up here for times since the start of term"
"Well maybe we should just ask him?"
"Sure! Hi Rem, do you by any chance suffer from mental breakdowns or some handicap or are you just not a physically strong person that you visit the Hospital wing about every month?Yeah I think that'll go down well!"
Remus had to suppress a snort of laughter; he had had enough of eavesdropping so he gave a huge false yawn to indicate his presence. Six eyes turned in his direction.
"Well blimey, you sure take your sweet time!" Said a nervous but cheery voice he recognized to be Sirius'.
"Slept thru the whole afternoon! The nurse even made us do our homework while we waited!" Added James.
"It won't kill you for once" replied Remus more coolly than he intended. "Th- Thanks for coming you guys" he added fearing he was too harsh.
"So…How are you?" Questioned Peter.
"I'm…" began Remus, he was about to say "fine" when a crazy thought came over him Why always lie? After all, they trust me and I, them… he heard his mother's tender voice ringing in hit ears:"Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter, don't mind…always remember that dear". For a crazy moment he considered finishing his phrase with "a werewolf" but it sounded fake and troubling so instead he said:
"I'm not doing so great actually, but it will pass, it always does" and after scanning the perplexed looks on his friends' faces he sighed and added closing hid eyes as if begging for strength:
"Every month around this time, I take a walk to the Shrieking Shack and I don't feel very well after that"
"You're mental! You visit that ghost or… or what ever it is that's making those noises?" Said Peter in disbelief.
"They started calling it the shrieking shack only when you started school didn't they? It's you isn't it?" said Sirius his tone barely auditable and his head bowed so that Remus didn't see his face but still nodded solemnly.
An expression of dawning comprehension fell upon James' face as he linked two and two.
"Are you… Are you a werewolf?" Asked James biting his lip but looking up. Again, Remus nodded.