The Other Guy
It happened all at once within a matter of minutes, the feeling of powerlessness and the overwhelming need to break the silence that I bestowed between us; to not stand there and appear lesser than what I was. My eyes fell back to the very item that caused such internal havoc within me, a simple item that has caused me much distress was a quill. A single quill that she had asked for not too long ago, time seemed to slow as I registered her words clenching the quill between my finger and thumb. A simple item that has rendered me powerless, no it wasn't the quill it was her… her words, her very presence brought me to pale.
I extend my arm amazingly holding out the quill towards her till she noticed it was there, in my mind I am screaming at myself to speak words in order to not appear foolish. But alas, my throat felt like a dry canal not filled with water but barren… mounds of sand visible instead of currents of water. Swallowing didn't help as I hoped as it just felt like my Adam's apple was dragging itself against the sand, eventually she looked behind her shoulder and spotted the quill. Her cheeks turned rosy as her lips connected to them forming that wonderful smile, she took the quill into her hands and then shifted her eyes to me "Thanks Harry…" she spoke softly. Her eyes returning to her parchment that was spread out in front of her, I took an inaudible sigh as I seemed to be released from my prison that binded me in what really was the time frame of two minutes.
Go ahead laugh at me; ridicule me for such a presentation of my weakness… a display of my lack of masculinity I don't care. Because I know one truth and it's the one truth that truly matters I Harry James Potter am completely in love with Hermione Granger and that my friends makes me a fool…
I am nothing more than the Other Guy, a single entity with no hope of moving forward with her in any capacity more than just being her friend. "Yeah Hermione Granger… she's a weird one that's for sure, she is constantly studying and doing homework like as if one person has that much to do. But that's not the weirdest thing about her; she spends all her time with this one guy who isn't even her boyfriend. Like you know, you can't do that… I mean that's a big no no right? I feel sorry for that other guy though…" thanks for the sympathy I think Parvati.
Yes, the woman I am in love with is already taken by another man. His name was Ronald Bilius Weasley, a man of tall stature topped with fiery ginger hair that had an uncanny resemblance to Dudley's muggle utensil a pencil. Godric Gryffindor would surely be proud to know that he has him in his house; he resembles everything a male lion would have in the wild. He was lazy, arrogant and always walked around with a proud grin on his face as if he ruled the halls. His persona would usually deter me in almost every fashion but I had to put on a friendly face because there was no warning when he would randomly but into our time together.
Like most things that is how I see him through my lenses, Hermione on the other hand seems content with him. I wouldn't say happy per say but content to be with him and have him around. They met one summer in Diagon Alley, Hermione from what she told me went to Borgin and Burke's for a new set of potion's textbooks that was written in the ninth edition that she couldn't have found anywhere else. She had asked me to go with her but with the overwhelming heat and drought Aunt Petunia had me knees deep in dirt tending to the gardens making sure her prize winning flowers were not to be harmed by the alarming weather. Hermione had trouble finding the last book she needed to complete the set as fate would have it the shopkeeper was taking inventory at the time of her visit.
And that's when Ronald swooped in and saved the day, he so happened to be there at the same time as her and offered his services. Hermione elated by his chivalry was immediately taken by him or at least that's how she tells it when she reminds me and gushes about him. I smile and nod for her to continue even though with each passing word the grip on my heart tightened. The sad truth was there was no way I could have been there to prevent it, fate was not in my favor that summer Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon certainly knew that for sure.
Shaking myself free from my own thoughts and memories I quickly realized that Hermione wasn't anywhere near me anymore. As if me zoning out had elapsed more of time than I bargained for. Looking around the common room I searched for her, but it shouldn't take a genius or even Seamus to figure out where she was. She sat with that him at the other end of the room; I quickly turned away as I felt the ache start to build within me. "Students? Hello Students?" came the familiar voice of Professor McGonagall who seemed to be making an announcement of some sort. Good, I needed the distraction to divert any attention away from the sight that would surely make me gasp for air.
Turning to Professor McGonagall I started thinking about the future, in the coming years she would shake my hand on Graduation Day and I would finally start a life of my own. I attempted to glance her way to ask myself if she would have any part of it but my body froze before I could get ever a glimpse of her. There is more of a chance that the future I want is not going to happen, so I have to sooner or later accept the inevitable and move on from these feelings I have for Hermione… for both our sakes. As much as it will hurt me, I will have to distance myself from her for as long as I need to do so… she will question me no doubt and I know in my heart all I will tell her would be lies.
"May I have your attention students, due to the overwhelming amount of requests from the ladies of each house… and Ms. Brown." A small amount of giggles escaped Lavender and her friends clearly satisfied that they got their way, McGonagall dropped her knowing look as she continued to address the entire room "Hogwarts will be hosting an annual ball for all to attend before the winter holidays, proper dress and etiquette will be expected from all… there will be no repeat of any foolish mumbo jumbo present last year during the Yule Ball. I expect all of you to show great honor to the house of Gryffindor and not bring shame to our proud house. That is all…"
Just as quickly as my plans had begun they quickly come crashing down, my expression was unreadable I'm sure but once I spoke my intention was known "Fuck."