Title: The color of your eyes in death
Author: Alexis Sacrifar
Beta Reader: Shadowminion
Genre: Angst / Tragedy
Pairing: Possibly Sasunaru if you have a good imagination for in betweens.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
A/N: The first few ones that romance is not included in the genre, hahaha!! What am I doing, posting all my fictions up at the same time? But anyway, I hope you'll like this one too if you liked my other ones.
It wasn't as if I never did try – you never once looked at me.
For as long as he could remember, Naruto hated Sasuke with all of his heart, he always had, and always will. From the day since they were young, since they set eyes upon each other, their positions were already established. Naruto never did like how Sasuke looked at him, with eyes of cold, condescending beauty, as if telling him that he was nothing better than the dirt on the ground. Telling him that he would never acknowledge him.
That was what made him chase after the bastard, after all.
"Teme!!" Naruto cursed as Sasuke caught the heel of his foot before it connected with the side of his head, gripping his ankle with the other hand in a vice. He didn't even have a chance to react before he was flipped to the hard, unyielding ground. He heard his shoulder crack as it made impact with the hard surface. Ignoring the burst of pain that flared through it, he rolled away to avoid Sasuke's next series of attacks and was back on his feet in no time. Not a single second was wasted, as he blocked off the attacks that rained down upon him from all directions, and spotting a slip in the Uchiha's attack, threw in a few punches of his own. The raven did not even sweat as he coolly, unerringly blocked off each and every one of his attacks effortlessly, weaving in and out to dodge and to land a well timed blow on Naruto, which served to infuriate him further. He wasn't even trying, the prick… did he looked down upon him so much he barely considered him worthy as an opponent?
"Kage no bunshin!!"
He saw the Uchiha glance around at the clones that now surrounded them both, saw him pause in his attacks for a moment as his clones launched themselves towards him. There would be no escape this time – he was surrounded. I'll get you for sure and wipe that arrogant smile off your face this time!! He caught the bastard's smirk too late, as the Uchiha threw himself to the ground, skidding away before the clones reached him, watched in sudden understanding horror as those pale hands moved, faster than the eye could follow, into recognizable seals-
"Katon – Gokakyo no Jutsu!!"
Naruto threw his hands up before his face as the blast of fire erupted from the jutsu to envelop his shadow clones – he felt them poof out, the tongue of flame that almost reached him, singeing his eyebrows. Somewhere through the roaring blast he heard Kakashi sensei say something, but he couldn't hear what, as Sasuke came hurtling out of the fire suddenly and slamming into him, the force of impact sent him crashing backwards into a tree, knocking the air out of him and sending his right shoulder into a new flare of pain again. "Ngh!!" there was hardly any time in between those attacks as he felt something slam into the side of heard, and saw stars, his world tilting for a moment before Sasuke advanced again, breaking down his defenses. Somewhere he slipped in up close and gave a back kick, felt his foot connect with something solid with a satisfying crack, saw Sasuke fly a few feet only to be stopped by a tree. Finish it, a voice whispered, but the intense pain that suddenly exploded in his shoulder again stopped him, as he clutched his injured shoulder, groaning. He would have thought the fight would have ended by now, till he felt the intent to kill in the air, and looked up, stunned, into the blood red eyes of the sharingan.
"Naruto!!"
Somewhere he heard Kakashi yell in warning, and threw himself out of the way just as shurikens thudded into the wood of the tree, hearing the wood splinter behind him, feeling the burning pain on his left upper arm where a shuriken had snagged him then, panic seizing him. "Wait!! Kakashi sensei said no weapons –"The rest of his sentence was lost as Sasuke tackled him to the ground. Metal flashed as the raven pinned him by the neck and drew his arm back…
He slowly opened his eyes, to see Sasuke still frozen in position, straddling him, eyes burning with unbridled fury as Kakashi sensei stood behind him, hand caught in a tight grip to stop him from stabbing Naruto with the kunai.
"That's enough, Sasuke. I said no weapons – and if you didn't hear before, I said 'stop' when Naruto was injured," his teacher said coldly, icy fury lacing through his words. "Or were you intending on killing him?"
Those eyes, glaring down at him were filled with hatred and fury, burning him as if he was in a furnace, paralyzing him with their intent to kill, hurt, maim. As Sasuke glared at Naruto, the only sound echoing through the training field was their harsh, ragged breathing.
An age later Sasuke shifted, jerking his hand away from Kakashi's grip. Naruto flinched at the sight of the deadly weapon in Sasuke's hand, but relaxed as the sharingan faded away, and familiar onyx eyes looked back into his own again ,a little bashful, a little apologetic, but still proud, as Sasuke moved off him, and he felt the weight on his stomach leave him. With the threatening presence off him, Naruto was able to move again, and rolled onto his side, groaning, forcing himself into a sitting position and wiped away the blood that was running down from a cut above his eyes, his face heating up from the humiliation of defeat and anger at his own weakness. He felt light hands upon his shoulders, winced slightly when they pressed a little on his right, and turned to look into the concerned eye of the copy-nin.
"Naruto…" he watched Kakashi assess his injuries with his lone eye. "We better get you to Tsunade – that shoulder seems to be pretty bad."
"Um." He allowed Kakashi to help him to his feet, not noticing the slight crease of the jounin's brow at his unusually silent behavior. Naruto himself would be most happy to scream and vent his frustration at the Uchiha there and then, but somehow, he just couldn't bring himself to raise his voice at the bastard. He saw the underlying hint of sadness and loneliness in those orbs, and it tugged at him, triggering something other than simple anger. By the time he left, Sasuke was still facing away from him, his back towards him and the rest of the world, shutting out all and everything. Narrowing his eyes to the red and white fan emblem that represented the Uchiha clan on the back of his dark blue shirt, Naruto allowed himself to be led away by Kakashi.
Later in the day, news caught him that Kakashi had given Sasuke a good dressing down for ignoring orders and attempting to injure fellow comrades.
To be honest, he didn't really blame Sasuke for what he had done, even though the fact remains that he is still a prick. During that training, it was clear that it wasn't him that Sasuke was attacking, the hatred, the anger – none of those were meant for him. Sasuke had not been looking at him. Of course, he thought bitterly. Since when did the bastard ever see him? No, he only had eyes for Itachi and Itachi alone. Nothing he ever did was for anything else, but the sole goal of tracking down and killing his brother. To Naruto, the defeat was bitter, and victory over the Uchiha left no taste. What does it matter if Sasuke never ever acknowledged him? This in itself was the ultimate defeat. No matter if Naruto caught up with Sasuke, because all that mattered was Sasuke being another step closer to his brother. Itachi, whoever you are, he thought tiredly. Who are you? What are you? Who are you… to him? Sometimes, he sincerely wished that the hatred and disgust in those bottomless black eyes were meant for him, and looked at no one else but him alone.
Whoever or whatever that Itachi was, he really envied him.
It did surprise him when the said stuck up bastard turned up on his doorstep the very same night. He didn't know what to say when he opened his door to see Sasuke standing there, wearing his usual self-smug expression, his head turned slightly to the side, one hand in his pocket. To Naruto, he seemed even more beautiful in the night, even though he knew that the cold beauty was just a façade. He stepped aside to allow Sasuke entry into his house, and silently shut the door behind him, watching Sasuke slowly walk to the center of his messy apartment, sharp eyes taking in the half eaten ramen standing lonesome on the table, the various books and scrolls scattered all over the place haphazardly, the bandages that littered the bed and the bin. Needless to say, Naruto was highly uncomfortable with the situation. To have someone in his room, much less his rival, and after what occurred earlier in the day…
Huffing, Naruto stalked back to his bed and shifting the bandages on it away, plonked himself down on his bed, snatching up the kyuubi plushie that had been given to him ages ago by Iruka when he was young, and toyed with its nine tails, remembering what his teacher had told him then – to accept himself and love himself for what he was, and not to despise it. It had been hard then, he remembered, but he did it. Reluctantly, he lifted his eyes to meet Sasuke's, who was now standing some distance away from him, intense black eyes trained upon him, as if trying to read something.
"What're you here for, teme?" His voice broke the silence, harsher and colder than he intended it to be.
"I just came to see whether the usuratonkachi is dying of his injuries, dobe," snapped the Uchiha, a spark of anger in his eyes which faded away as quickly as it had come.. "Since you're so weak anyway."
"You – " Naruto started furiously. "Who started it first, you arrogant prick?? Who used weapons?! And I was going easy on you – who would have thought that you wanted to kill me?! I suppose it doesn't really matter to you, does it? Killing a team mate? Oh sure, as long as you're gaining power, anything will do!! I – " his next retort died on his lips when he caught the look Sasuke had. He had never seen the proud Uchiha look so vulnerable before, and the despair in his eyes… it was as if he was begging for someone to help him. Naruto felt like reaching out to him then, as he stood there looking so helpless, but pride held him back. "As you can see, I'm perfectly fine, so you can go home now, teme," he scoffed, turning away from him, adding emphasis to the last word. "Go."
The said raven did not speak for a while, then closed the distance between them, causing the younger male to flinch slightly as he gently touched his bandaged shoulder with cold fingers. "…I'm sorry…" murmured the Uchiha so softly it was almost inaudible. Naruto looked up at his rival disbelievingly, but saw how exposed the raven's emotions were before his hard, emotionless mask snapped back into place, confusion replaced by cold resolve as he turned his back on the younger male and made his exit. Naruto watched him go, a mixture of emotions swirling within him. For a moment there, he had seen Sasuke for who he really was. Scared, confused, angry, lonely. It seemed like a reflection of his own past, just that no one had tried to help him. But it wasn't as if there really was 'no one' to help him, he had locked himself away in a place where no one could ever reach him. As he hugged kyuubi to his chest, along with the fond memories of those that he loved, the lone back of Sasuke flashed into his mind again, and he wondered how long it had been that the bastard had isolated himself.
That was the first and the last time that they ever got so close to understanding each other.
As time gradually passed, they drifted further and further apart, to the point where none of them was even in Sasuke's consideration anymore. Not that they were close to start with anyway. It came to a point where that prick's eyes no longer saw them anymore, but trained somewhere, somewhere else far away, on that one person that he had been looking at for so long. Everything else was unimportant, simply another step to bring him closer to the goal. It made Naruto question himself time and time again, why he was fighting so hard to gain acknowledgement he never would get – he was just the dead last, always, in those dark, shadowed eyes that spoke of so much pain. He knew what the answer was, but his pride refused to allow him to accept the fact that he was fighting to save his friend.
When the prick finally turned his back on them, on Konoha, Naruto guessed that he knew it was coming all along. It was expected that the cold hearted bastard would leave them, betray them for his own selfish revenge, but that didn't stop him from being hurt. Perhaps he had trusted him to return to them – he should have known that it was too late. But he had wanted to rekindle that, hoping that somehow he would hear him, even if had to beat it into his head – whether he saw Naruto or not, it no longer mattered. But it was too late for all of them. Sasuke was gone, Team 7 was no more. Kakashi sensei didn't say anything, but somehow he knew it affected him to have the student he trusted in for so long to betray everyone, and for them to become enemies now that Sasuke had joined Orochimaru. Naturally, Sakura was devastated; there wasn't a day when he saw her really smile ever since his departure.
This incident really hardened us all, huh?
On lonely, cold nights, he found himself thinking of the stuck up raven, of the day that that fight broke out between them both, of the days when he was still a part of Team 7, and wondered how he was doing now.
He still wished that one day, somehow, the bastard would return.
Do you ever think of us now you're gone?
It was years later when they crossed each other's paths again, but by then Sasuke was lying cold and unmoving on the ground, forever oblivious to everything around him, and gone to a place where they could never follow. It was the same; they were always too slow, too late. By the time they arrived, the place was in smoke and rubble, the ground blood stained, evidence of what had happened. Naruto approached the cold body slowly, as Sakura gave a strangled cry and turned to Kakashi. His face was stoic, still strikingly beautiful, even in death. He knelt down, mourning silently. Smoke stung his eyes, yet he could not cry. He could hear Sakura sobbing behind him, but the understanding he had with the teme prevented him from doing the same. In a way, this was what Sasuke wanted all along, wasn't it?
He didn't know why Sasuke was so bent on revenge. He couldn't understand that pointless, blind rage. He wasn't the bastard, but he was sure he had about the same cruel experiences that Sasuke had gone through as well. What made him so different, then? It seemed unreal, as he looked down at him. He thought he had finally caught up with him, perhaps, finally, an opponent worthy of the Uchiha to fight. But the asshole was still one step ahead of him, always ahead of him. He was almost angry that Sasuke left without… but anger was already useless here. The emptiness in those onyx eyes told him that much. Eyes that used to speak, used to burn with a certain desire, that showed the prick was alive, has gone out forever, leaving behind an empty shell of what used to be, a lifeless doll, its task completed. Naruto reached out a hand subconsciously, to touch that face, his fingertips encountering cool, smooth skin, trailing up cold cheeks to rest on glass eyes, and closed them forever.
"Naruto…" Kakashi began quietly, watching his student straighten from the still body, eyes lingering a little longer on Itachi's corpse, lying not too far away.
"…Let's go," murmured Naruto quietly.
Before he left, he glanced back for one last time. Goals were meant to provide happiness when achieved.
Itachi had been Sasuke's goal.
Did you find solace?
But dead people tell no stories.
-owari-
A/N: hope you liked it!! I finally found myself a beta reader. Although she butchers my stories like crazy and she's a bit messed up in her head ( she was messing with my food today ) I still love her. Her editing powers are really AWESOME. LOVE YOU!! Do review too. Reviews are my life, like, seriously.