The quest for sanity
Ivan Braginski was a simple person. He enjoyed the simple things in life, like being in the warm sun and watching the day go by. He also enjoyed the hobby of gardening, most of the time with his elder sister Yekaterina who he was very fond of. The two had never spent time together as children due to the fact their parents had died young and left their three children to go to relatives in three different countries. For that reason they had only been able to get in contact when they were adults and all moved to the same neighbourhood. Also he enjoyed the fact that unlike everyone else, his older sister seemed to be the only sane person that liked him. Just because he was the tallest person in the neighbourhood, also the most muscular, had a scary slasher smile most of the time and carried around a metal pipe in case of a fight. Oh, and the fact that there was rumours that he fled Russia and used the cover of finding his siblings to cover up the fact he was running from charges of murder. Which he insisted was not true, even though the government and evidence did.
Life was good though, he was living in a comfy house, he had nice neighbours, fresh sunflowers everyday and he hadn't been forced to change his name. So what if that cute brunette had rejected his advances and everyone else for that matter, they would all be his one day. Right now he didn't have a care in the world. It was a shame about that stalker girl that was also his little sister.
…
"Brother! Brother! Where are you going, brother?" asked Natalia running after her fleeing brother.
Ivan was currently on the run from his little sister, who as usual was being a crazy stalker. She had seen him on the way to the deserted plot Yekaterina used as a garden. He had so far tried to escape by jumping various gates and tall brick walls, but to avail. The delicate built teenager seemed to have no trouble keeping up with her older brother who was built like a tank. As strange as that sounded.
"Go away Natalia! I'm going somewhere by myself!"
"No your not! You're going to visit sister! Why are you going to see her when you have me?" spat Natalia as she grabbed hold of her brother's coat before slamming him hard into a brick wall.
Ivan whimpered and began to tremble, he may have been someone to fear but there was something about his little sister that scared him. Fortunately there was an angel looking after him.
"Natalia, could you please leave Ivan alone. I know you like him but please can't you see you're scaring him?"
God bless Yekaterina, she had once again come to save Ivan from Natalia's misguided love. Natalia observed Yekaterina for a few seconds before releasing her hold on Ivan, due to the fact Yekaterina was one of the few people she ever listened to. It might have been due to the fact she was the eldest sibling or maybe it was due to the fact that Natalia couldn't stand to look at her sister due to the fact that any woman that looked at the eldest of the trio made them feel self couscous about the size of their breasts.
Ivan quickly hugged his elder sister tightly in thanks, but not too tightly. Otherwise the poor thing would suffocate. Natalia stalked off somewhere out of sight.
"Thankyou for saving me. I do love her, but Natalia can be so..." trailed off Ivan unsure how to finish his sentence.
"A bit headstrong?" asked Yekaterina.
Well, that fit okay. Even though crazy possessive bitch would have fit better, though maybe that was a bit too kind for her.
....
The garden wasn't bare of human life when Ivan entered. In fact there was a surprising amount of people, four in all. Which for an area that was the rumoured haunt of an axe crazy Russian murderer and his family was far above the average number, which consisted of three people. The said axe murderer and family.
Ivan was about to walk over to the bunch and have a nice little talk about trespassing when he saw that one of the trespassers was that cute brunette that had rejected his advances. Oh that was perfect, this was just the opportunity he had been waiting for to steal the brunettes heart. He had been looking for a way to corner the future love of his life so there was nowhere to run or hide from him. Even if the four tried to fight him he would make short work of them, no one had ever beat him in a fight. Well one person had... That had been by pure accident though, he had slipped on a half eaten hamburger and had knocked himself out on the floor. Hey, he was tall which had caused him to fall from a greater height then most and the frozen ground had been very hard.
Also...He had kind of... Almost died...
This had been pure accident as well, as they had been fighting on a slope with a frozen pond at the bottom of it. He had rolled down towards it and the ice had broken under his weight causing him to sink to his apparent death. His opponent had dived in to save him and the American idiot had pulled him out before calling an ambulance. He really hated that Alfred F Jones and if it wasn't for his adopted brother who was keeping a close eye on Ivan the stupid yank would have had an "accident" by now.
Ivan shook his head to rid himself of the thought. This was far from the right time and place to dwell upon such things, now was a time for thinking of the cute brunette. He was about to make his move when a soft hand on his arm stopped him.
"Yekaterina, what is it?" whispered Ivan, he didn't want to startle the others now.
"I know what you're going to do, Vanya. I don't want you doing it either, it took me a lot to convince Toris to come here and I'm not about to let you go and ruin it."
Ivan smiled, he had been fantasizing about what the cute brunette's name was and now he had it. Toris, a name he could yell till his voice was hoarse. He looked at his sister and smiled a genuine smile at her, she had always been one to have his best interest at heart.
"Thankyou Katyusha, you have always been my favourite sister for a good reason. Don't worry, I'm not about to ruin your wonderful gift."
Yekaterina lifted her hand to gently yank on a lock of his hair, she often did this to let him know he was doing something wrong.
"I know you won't ruin it on purpose, but I know you better then you know yourself. You're the type to ruin things unconsciously and I don't want to see you do it again."
Ivan saw her eyes were starting to well up, this wasn't good. He needed to fix her mood fast before she started full out bawling.
"Don't worry, I promise I'll be good. How about you come along and tell me when I'm doing something wrong, just yank on my scarf to let me know I'm doing it wrong. How about that?"
Yekaterina smiled and Ivan knew he had just saved himself from drowning in his sister's tears, an event he had to avert very often.
"Really? You would let me do that? Oh Vanya, you make me so happy." said Yekaterina as she threw herself into her brother's arms.
Unfortunately Ivan had been bending down to talk to her and she had jumped up to hug him meaning that Ivan's face had been smacked by Yekaterina's breasts. Ivan had reeled backwards to try an escape and his unlucky foot had made contact with a stone so he had gone stumbling backwards crashing through the gate to the garden and into a table with a watering can on it.
"Vanya! Are you okay?" cried out Yekaterina.
Ivan looked up at the sky above him wondering how he had just ended up on the ruined remains of a wooden table with a watering can lying on his chest with the contents covering the top half of his body. He saw his sister rush through the gate to help him but someone had gotten to him first, they kneeled at his side and pressed their soft hands to his face.
"Are you okay?"
It was Toris.
"I said, are you okay? Come on talk to me."
Ivan realised that he had been unmoving just staring up at Toris with a rather unappealing look of shock plastered across his face. He slowly had managed to struggle to a sitting position, the watering can had fallen off of his chest but that look of shock had remained on his face. Toris's hands had remained on his cheeks and he raised his left hand to one of them, he felt the hand twitch under the unexpected touch but it didn't pull away.
"Yes, I'm fine. I just took a little trip, I am sorry but I didn't get a postcard for you."
It took Toris a second or two to realise that the scary Russian man had just told a joke, it was so unexpected that he couldn't help but smile and he even let himself laugh a little. He knew Feliks was rushing towards him preparing to save him from the monster that had been stalking him for a few months now.
"So it's Toris isn't it?" asked Ivan.
"Uh, yes it is. I'm afraid I don't know your name, Mr Russia."
Ivan smirked, the whole situation was going surprisingly well, even without Yekaterina's help or a graceful entrance. He had Toris where he wanted him and not even Natalia could ruin this, well maybe she could if she suddenly jumped off a nearby roof into the garden with her ninja skills and proceeded to massacre everyone here. He wouldn't even be surprised if she did!
"Even though I like the sound of Mr Russia very much, I guess I have to tell you my name. It's Ivan but you can call me Vanya if you want, my sister calls me that all the time."
"Liet, like what the hell are you doing? That's the crazy stalker axe murderer."
Toris looked up at his friend who was standing there with his hands on his slim hips trying to look as threatening as possible despite his small stature. Toris realised then that what he was doing was a very, very bad idea. He quickly yanked his hands away from Ivan's face and jumped to his feet.
Ivan shot Feliks a glare before slowly clambering to his feet with the help of Yekaterina, his back ached from the fall and table. He shook the water from his hair before turning to the pair who were giving him looks of fear, guess all his hard work was undone. He tried to smile brightly despite his anger, unfortunately this just caused Toris to flinch.
"Who are your friends, Toris?" asked Ivan, motioning to the bratty blond and two boys cowering nearby.
"Uh, this is my friend Feliks and those two over there are my cousins Edward and Raivis."
"Ah, so you brought you family. I don't know if you've already met her, but this is my sister Yekaterina." declared Ivan, pushing Yekaterina forward rather roughly in an attempt to keep the conversation going.
"Like, we have met. She was the one who invited us here, but she didn't tells us you were going to be here Mr Serial Killer and she didn't tell us you were going to be dripping wet." spat Feliks.
"Well if it bothers you so much I'll guess I have to take off my wet clothes."
"Wait, don't do..." trailed off Feliks as he watched Ivan proceed to pull his shirt over his head.
Ivan kept a straight face but inside he was smirking like a mad man, he had Toris now. The brunette was staring in shock at the bare chested Russian, taking the well defined muscles into account. Ivan knew he was an attractive person and he had used it many times before, so why not now? He used his shirt to pretend to dry his hair but only ruffled it up to an appealing degree.
"It is a good thing my pants didn't get wet, otherwise I would have had to take them off."
"Yeah, real shame that." mumbled Toris, he was obviously still in shock.
Feliks shook his best friend angrily in an attempt to snap him out of the spell the Russian was weaving.
"Liet, snap out of it. You've seen half-naked men before."
"He calls you Liet, why is this?"
"Fr-from, Lithuania. Poland pe-people they call it that." stuttered Toris.
"It is a cute name, Liet." purred Ivan.
Toris's willpower was draining away by the second and it all but disappeared when Ivan decided he wanted to stretch his arm muscles for some unknown reason. If it wasn't for Feliks having a tight hold of him Toris would have collapsed on the floor and by the sound of someone hitting the floor hard behind him one of his cousins most likely had, most likely Raivis.
"RAIVIS!" shouted Edward.
Yep, that was defiantly Raivis. Toris wasn't concerned about that at all about that at the moment, Ivan was flexing his muscles, his wonderful, wonderful muscles. He was about to pluck up his courage to say something when unexpectedly a torrent of water hit Ivan and drenched him in water.
The source of the water had come from a shed roof. Natalia was standing on the roof holding a hose that looked a lot like the type that was usually attached to a fire engine. After making sure her brother was properly soaked she turned of the torrent of water and jumped very dramatically off of the tin roof before landing cat like in front of her brother. At that moment Toris had forgotten all about Ivan and was now focused on the beautiful elegant woman who had made such an entrance into his life.
"Brother! Your pants are wet, you have to take them off now. Let me help you."
Natalia made a dive for Ivan's belt but he was too fast for her, he had grabbed Yekaterina and had shoved her into Natalia causing the girl to get a face full of her sister's breasts. Ivan briefly wondered why it was him and Natalia were the only ones to have that happen to them. He then ran over to Toris and Feliks and hid behind them. This just made Natalia even angrier.
"Get out of the way fags. You are standing between me and my brother."
"Like, take him. Me and Liet don't care about him." scoffed Feliks.
"Please go out with me." shouted Toris, his face bright red.
If a wall had been in front of Ivan at that moment he would have repeatedly hit his head against it until something gave way, most likely the wall. The love of his life was in love with his sister, who was in love with him. It was a full on love triangle, a deadly one at that. As Natalia tackled them all to the ground Ivan realised something, he would never be able to have a normal life or a sane one. Oh well, there was always the alternative, which was a life on the run as a wanted criminal. So right now an insane life wasn't as bad as it seemed.
"Kolkolkolkol..."
A/N: Well that sure did take a long time. So yeah this is the sequel to The Quest for Masculinity but you might not notice anything similar between them. This is because they are part of a mini trilogy about three of the families in the neighbourhood of Hetalia, which is a very run down neighbourhood in England renowned for being full of foreigners. I set it in England because I needed a country that is full of foreign people and it won out against America, because I used to live in England and I only know things about America that I've seen in the movies.
So next up is the family of Arthur, I have no idea what to name it so if you wanna review you can suggest a title but it has to start with "The quest for..." Also with the countries without human names you are welcome to suggest some. I also really need a name for Hong Kong and Australia because they are appearing in the next one. So far I'm thinking Kai and Oscar, but that's only if I have nothing else.
Also if there are any mistakes please tell me. If someone tells me to spell things the American way though, I am going to scream. No, seriously. Colour.