Total Drama 52
Chapter 1: Day 1: Part 1: Noella
Disclaimer: Total Drama is not mine. Likewise, the characters are not mine.
This story takes place after the events of Total Drama Pahkitew Island. References to previous seasons may be made throughout the story.
Chris was standing on a dock located on an island, as he began speaking. "Welcome! We've had six terrific seasons of Total Drama so far, and if there's one thing they all have in common, it's that I am awesome!" Chris threw his hands into the air on those words. "But as much as you all love me, I know that I, alone, does not a show make. For some reason, you like those other contestants, too." Chris took out a picture of Duncan. "Some of them, everyone loves!" Chris took out a picture of Staci. "Some of them, no one loved." Chris took out a picture of Courtney. "Some of them started fan wars." Chris took out a picture of Noah. "Some of them…." Christ shrugged. "Really, I have no idea how this one got so popular." Chris took out a picture of Dawn. "Or her. I mean, really? She was like in one episode!" Chris tossed the pictures into the water. "Regardless, you all had your favorites, and we couldn't decide who to bring back that would appease all of my fans, so we brought 'em all! That's right, all fifty-one contestants who have appeared in our past seasons. So whoever your favorite contestant was, you'll get a chance to root for them in our biggest season yet, for our biggest prize yet: $5 million! You're not going to want to miss this, so who will win? Find out now on Total! Drama! Fifty-One!
Chris was standing on the dock, smiling for the camera. "Welcome back to "Total Drama Fifty-One! It's our biggest season yet, and we've brought back all fifty-one contestants." Chris pointed toward off screen. "And here comes our first contestant, Amy!"
Amy stepped off the first boat, with her arms crossed over her chest, looking annoyed. "This place sucks. At least my stupid sister isn't here."
Chris smirked. "Charming, isn't she?" Chris looked to Amy. "Well, we got your request that you did not want to come with Samey, and you wanted to get here before her, and since you're better than Samey, I figured why not." Chris shrugged.
"First one here," Amy said, looking around. "I do deserve the honor."
"You're actually the second one here," someone else said.
"What?! Who said that?!" Amy shouted, looking around. Chris himself looked puzzled, too.
"If I startled you, I apologize. My name is Dawn." Dawn was sitting on the dock, next to where Amy was standing. Chris looked confused.
"Get away from me, you freak!" Amy shouted, looking freaked out.
Dawn looked up at Amy, concerned. "I could try to help you with Sammi if you-"
"Who the fuck is this 'Sammi' person?" Amy asked, annoyed. "If you mean Samey, she's a total bitch, and the only help I need it voting her out." Dawn looked like she wanted to say something, but decided not to.
Chris scratched his head. "How did you get here, anyway?" Chris shrugged. "Doesn't matter anyway, because our next contestant is here! It's everyone's favorite-for some reason-Noah!"
Noah stepped off the boat onto the dock, then sighed. "Yay. I see I'm the first sane person here." Noah looked like he was thinking about something. "Probably the last sane person, too."
"What's with the nerd?" Amy asked, sounding annoyed still. "Is this the competition? I'm going to have no trouble."
Noah smirked. "Is that so, Samey?"
"I'm not Samey!" Amy yelled, tightening her arms by her side.
"You look like Samey," Noah said, looking like he was enjoying himself. "I even remember the blueberry mole. I'm hoping that's not the same blueberry."
"This-" Amy started, tugging at her mole, before stopping. "Just shut up!"
"Nice to see you made a friend," Chris said, smirking. "So, Noah, how does it feel to be the smartest person here?"
"I would say 'good,'" Noah said, "because everyone else would know to rely on me for my brain, but that isn't going to happen."
"OK…" Chris trailed off, annoyed. "I was hoping for a different answer, because I wanted to segue from you to our next contestant, but you kind of ruined that." Chris motioned to the next boat. "Against the advice of our lawyers, here's Scarlett!"
Scarlett stepped off the next boat, with her hair back in a bun and her glasses back on, looking a bit nervous, rubbing her hand against her other arm. "Greetings," Scarlett said. "I am certain you saw me last season, correct?" Dawn perked up in interest.
"Oh yeah," Noah said.
"I would just like to state upfront that I apologize for the whole trying to kill everyone plot," Scarlett said, then laughed nervously. Dawn looked like she was scrutinizing Scarlett.
Noah shrugged. "Chris does that every day. You get used to it."
"Darn tootin'," Chris stated proudly.
"And it's not like you threatened my life, personally," Noah stated, almost sounding bored.
"So I have your forgiveness, I take it?" Scarlett asked.
Noah shrugged. "Sure, why not."
Confession Outhouse
Noah: Do I believe Scarlett's whole "oh, I'm sorry for trying to kill everyone last season" act? No. But I'll let her believe that I believe her.
Dawn: I can't get a good read on Scarlett. She's definitely hiding something, but I can't tell what. I'm hoping she's changed, but she has a darkness surrounding her, and that concerns me.
"What's with all the nerds?" Amy complained. "I swear, they're almost as bad as Samey."
Scarlett looked quizzically at Amy. "You… do remember how I tried to kill everyone last season, correct?"
"Like I care," Amy said, growing more irritated. "You voted me off, remember?!"
Scarlett smirked. "No, but I do remember voting Sammi off."
"For such a smart girl, I'm surprised you got Samey's name wrong," Chris said, then shrugged. "Then again, I wouldn't remember her name either if I weren't getting paid for things like that, so I don't really blame you." Chris motioned toward the next boat. "And here's… a contestant we really expected to be more popular. Zoey."
Zoey excitedly stepped off the next boat, and looked around. "Mike?"
"He had to use the bathroom," Amy said, with a sneaky grin. "You should go and bring him back here."
"Mike!" Zoey exclaimed, as she ran off toward the island, disappearing from sight soon enough.
Chris blinked. "Uh, OK?"
Confession Outhouse
Noah: (smirking) I can almost tolerate Amy when she does something like that.
Scarlett: I am hoping there actually is another bathroom on this island. I would really prefer not to use the same place to talk to the camera as I use to do my business.
"Is Zoey here?" Mike asked, excited.
"Meet Mike, everybody," Chris said, then chuckled to himself.
"You do all the funny voices, right?" Amy asked. "Do Mal, he was my favorite!"
Mike blinked. "You know I'm cured, right?"
Scarlett shook her head. "You can't cure dissociative identity disorder via the push of a button. It's not that simple."
Mike blinked. "Dissa… what?"
Scarlett slapped her forehead in frustration. "Of course. I mean 'multiple personality disorder," Scarlett said mockingly, using finger quotes.
"Cured by the power of love!" Mike exclaimed. "It's a shame Sky and Dave didn't hook up last season. I bet Sky could've cured Dave if only she loved him back."
Scarlett cringed. "I must remember to apologize to Sky for not putting her out of her misery last season."
"Of course," Noah stated. "I'm sure Sky would love an apology for not killing her."
"I'm in therapy," Scarlett stated. "I've been seeing doctors. You know, things you need to help deal with things like dissociative identity disorder. Or megalomania."
Dawn spoke up. "Mike, Zoey is-"
"You know, I bet the power of love would cure you too, Dawn," Mike said.
"…what?" Dawn asked, not sounding very happy.
"You know, your creepy… creepiness, whatever you call it," Mike said. "The whole psychic thing and all. Oh, what were you saying?"
Dawn looked at peace. "Sorry, lost my train of thought."
Confession Outhouse
Scarlett: I must admit to be fascinated by Dawn. Her abilities make no logical sense, but they do seem to be genuine. I'm certain I could find some use for her.
Chris started speaking. "And contestant number seven is-"
A red blur rushed past, knocking into Scarlett.
"Could you get off me?" Scarlett asked, annoyed, as she pushed Tyler off.
"Tyler, everyone," Chris said, somewhat weakly.
Amy looked Tyler up and down. "This one's worse than the nerds."
"With that I can agree," Scarlett said, standing back up, dusting herself off.
"I'll have you know I'm the best athlete at my school," Tyler said proudly.
"I pity the school," Scarlett said, smirking.
"That's nice, evil girl Noah," Chris said, "but it's time-"
"What did you call me?" Scarlett asked, contorting her face.
"Yeah, I don't really like repeating myself," Chris said. "Anyway, next is-"
"Zoey?" Mike asked, sounding excited. "Is it Zoey?"
"Sorta'," Chris said. "Well, Zoey 2.0, anyway, meet Sky!"
Sky stepped off the boat, annoyed. "Why do so many people call me that?"
Noah shrugged. "Don't bother trying to understand the fans of this show. It isn't pretty."
Confession Outhouse
Noah: Like what's with all the fan art of me and Cody? I do not like Cody in that way!
Scarlett walked over to Sky. "Good afternoon, Sky. I would just like to say that Chris wanted to kill you as well as I did."
"Did not!" Chris complained. "I was just indifferent. There's a difference between actively wanting you dead and a mere total disregard for your lives, I mean. Sheesh."
Scarlett shuddered. "Regardless, I apologize for sinking to Chris' level."
Sky looked uneasy. "OK, is Dave here?" Sky looked around, and let out a little shriek when she saw Noah.
"Do I really look like Dave?" Noah asked, annoyed.
Sky blushed. "Maybe a little. Anyway, I'd kind of just rather not see him now." Sky looked at Scarlett. "Or you, really. You know, the whole trying to kill me thing, and all."
"Understandable," Scarlett said. "I simply wanted to get that off my chest."
Confession Outhouse
Scarlett: Do I care for Sky's forgiveness? Not really, no. Did I cross a line last season? Yes. I neither expect nor care for friends, and Sky's athleticism would be very useful in the future, so I would like an alliance with her. As well as one other person I know I could trust to not allow friendship to cloud her judgment.
"Hi, I'm Courtney," Courtney said, stepping off the ninth boat, and looked at the contestants who were there. "I don't really know most of you," Courtney said, but glared at Scarlett.
"You tried to kill your fellow competitors as well, as I recall," Scarlett said, glaring back at Courtney.
"N-no I didn't," Courtney said, a bit flustered. "I-I knew the bomb wasn't real! We really weren't…" Courtney was rubbing her hands nervously.
"You got caught up in the game," Scarlett said, smirking. "It happens to us all."
"Yes, I remember the time I tried to kill everyone, too," Noah said, peeking his head up from a book. "They just edited that part out of the show." Noah rolled his eyes, then went back to his book.
"That… that was just a bad moment I was having," Courtney said. "As much as I would like to be perfect, I'm not-I mean, I used to be less perfect." Courtney smiled nervously, then noticed Sky. "I remember you. Even more athletic than I am." Courtney smiled, and extended a hand. "I'm Courtney."
"Sky," Sky said, looking a bit nervous.
Courtney looked like she understood what Sky was worried about. "If you like, I'll set Dave straight when he gets here. I'll be the bad guy. I've gotten used to the role."
Sky smiled a bit. "Thank you. I really need to do this myself, though." Sky smirked. "But I'll let you know if I need backup." Courtney nodded.
Confession Outhouse
Sky: I really didn't know what to expect from Courtney. Sometimes she seemed so nice in earlier seasons, but she could also be pretty mean. But I really think she's just playing the game
Scarlett: (irritated) Really, it's not like I'm the first contestant to ever threaten to kill my fellow competitors. Is that all I'm remembered for?
"This time, I shall prove my evilosity!" Max exclaimed right after stepping off the next boat. "You shall not-"
"Yeah, not buying it," Scarlett stated.
"Ah, Scarlett," Max said, looking smug. "I have decided, out of unusual generosity on my part, to forgive you for your disobedience, and I shall allow you to be my sidekick once more."
Courtney started laughing hysterically, then turned to Scarlett, who just looked at Courtney as if she were growing a second head. "Oh," Courtney said, embarrassed. "I thought… I just thought that was funny, and we'd both be laughing… oh, forget it."
"That was an amusing joke, I must admit," Scarlett stated, looking at her hand.
"I'm serious!" Max exclaimed, excited. "You have a special something that I overlooked before. Together, you and I could be the ultimate villainous duo to rule this game with an iron fist!"
"Terrifying," Noah stated, not looking up from his book.
Max walked over to Noah, who still didn't look up from his book. "Oh, you laugh now, but soon, I shall be the one laughing!" Max then started laughing maniacally.
Dawn looked to Max. "Max, why do you wish to be evil?"
Max stood proudly, putting his hand to his chest. "Because I am an evil genius! It's what I do! Spread chaos and fear throughout the land!" Dawn looked incredulously at Max.
"I'm the truly evil one here," Amy said smugly. "Just ask Samey."
"You do have a point," Noah stated, still not looking up from his book. "Tormenting your sister for the lulz for sixteen years for no reason. That legitimately does make you the most horrible person here. Congratulations."
"What?!" Amy shrieked. "That's-that's not what I meant! And I do have a reason! You don't know Samey at all! I-I know how horrible she is!"
"No one really cares," Chris said, yawning. "Anyway, here's contestant eleven, Cody!"
Cody cockily walked toward the other contestants. "Hey-a ladies, the Codemeister is here." Cody cocked his fingers like guns toward Scarlett, who shuddered.
"You do know I tried to kill the other contestants last season, right?" Scarlett asked, with no emotion in her voice.
Cody grinned. "I don't judge. Sounds kinky."
Confession Outhouse
Scarlett: (shuddering) I could almost feel sorry for Gwen, if I were at all capable of empathy.
"Is this pathetic peon disturbing you?" Max asked, glaring at Cody.
"Yes," Scarlett said. "I do not need your help handling him, though."
"So you wish to torture him yourself," Max said. "I can get that."
Cody looked at Max, puzzled. "He's kind of weird."
"It takes one to know one," Amy said, massaging her forehead.
"No one really cares," Chris said. "Anyway, here's our twelfth contestant, Beardo."
"Twelfth?" Mike asked, looking around. "Uh, Chris, there're only eleven of us here. I think you miscounted."
"No, I think you're just kind of stupid. But hey, not my fault you can't count to twelve."
"There are twelve of us," Noah said, not looking up from his book. "As much as I would love to correct Chris, he is right this time." Mike looked around, confused.
Confession Outhouse
Mike: (nervously) Is Zoey here, but hiding from me for some reason? No, no, I'm probably paranoid for nothing. I'm probably just overlooking someone. If Zoey were here, we'd already be making out, probably, I think.
"Say hello to Gwen," Chris said, as Gwen stepped off the next boat.
"Gwen!" Courtney exclaimed, glomping Gwen, who looked uncomfortable. "My dear friend, Gwen."
"Um, yeah," Gwen said, pushing Courtney off. "That ship sailed."
Confession Outhouse
Courtney: OK… I guess Gwen's still a little upset with that whole betrayal thing. I mean, it's not like I actually succeeded with that plan. And she said she'd forgive me if I voted myself off, so I deserve to be forgiven! (Courtney angrily crosses her arms.)
Noah: Yes, I'm so sure Gwen was going to greet Courtney with open arms. (Noah gives a thumbs up.) Worked like a charm.
"Katie and Sadie, everyone," Chris said, sounding disgusted, as Katie and Sadie stepped off the next boat. Chris was glaring at Katie.
"What did you do to piss Chris off?" Scarlett asked. "He wasn't even that upset when I got here."
Katie had a big, forced smile on her face. "I have no idea what you mean."
Noah smirked. "Oh, I could take a guess."
Confession Outhouse
Katie: (twiddling her fingers) So maybe I might've written this fan fiction-
Sadie: It was the best fan fiction ever!
Katie: (blushing) Well, yeah, but I kind of made myself the most awesome contestant ever, and made myself the winner, and gave myself a relationship with Noah-
Sadie: He is kinda' cute.
Katie: He totally is!
Katie and Sadie: Eeeiii!
Noah: Yeah, no. Katie is annoying, and her "fiction" is only that: fiction. Plus, I'm pretty sure that "story" is what gave Chris the idea to ramp up the cruelty in later seasons.
"Howdy, people!" Sugar exclaimed, stepping toward the contestants who were on the dock. "Nice to see some familiar faces," Sugar walked over to Courtney and elbowed her in the stomach. "Just to know, you were kickass on the show. Always thought of you as the uglier, dumber version of me."
Confession Outhouse
Sugar: Now I don't go handin' out compliments like candy, but Courtney was an inspiration for me. I mean, she ain't got nothing on me, but ya' gotta' admire the attitude.
Courtney: (straining her arms by her side while her eye is twitching)
"Ella ain't here yet, is she?" Sugar asked, looking around.
"Not yet," Courtney said, dripping with anticipation. "I actually look forward to meeting her, though."
"Might have to wait a while," Chris said, looking irritated.
Confession Outhouse
Sugar: (shaking her head) I know Courtney ain't as smart as me, but I gotta' make sure she doesn't fall under Ella's evil spell. Gotta' protect her, and all.
"Greetings, ladies," Justin said, stepping off the next boat, ripping his shirt off, and flexing his muscles. Almost everyone there just gave him a blank, confused stare.
"Put your shirt back on, you'll get sunburn," Scarlett said nonchalantly. Justin winced.
Confession Outhouse
Justin: (holding a mirror, rubbing his face) Am… am I losing it? I-I don't get it.
"Greetings, ladies," Alejandro said, stepping off the next boat. Scarlett blushed a bit, which both Courtney and Alejandro noticed. "I see I caught your eye, my senorita." Alejandro took Scarlett's hand and kissed it. Courtney looked upset.
Confession Outhouse
Alejandro: Of course. The bad girl falls for the bad boy. This is going to be fun.
Scarlett: Neanderthal. Al is not as intelligent as he believes himself to be, but it could be useful for him to believe that he can control me. Plus, I wanted to see how Max would react, and he did not disappoint.
"You fiend!" Max yelled, trying to swipe at Alejandro, while Alejandro held Max back, barely seeming to even notice he was there. "You have no right to use her for your own evil purposes! She's mine to use for my own evil purposes!"
"That's telling him," Noah stated, still reading his book.
"Anyway, here's Ezekiel," Chris said.
"Hey everybody," Ezekiel said, waving, then pushed Ezekiel into the water.
"Any particular reason for that random act of violence?" Noah asked, still with his head in his book.
Chris shrugged. "I dunno'. Felt like it."
"Wasn't he like a zombie before?" Amy asked. "How did he get back to normal? I mean, normal for him, anyway?"
"No one's really sure," Chris answered. No one really cares, either." Anyway, here's Shawn." Shawn stepped off the boat "You might want to be careful. I hear there's a zombie lurking around."
"I'm not worried," Shawn said. "We're probably not going to get zombies, I think." Ezekiel started to climb out of the water, and onto the dock. "Zombie!" Shawn took Noah's book and whacked Ezekiel on the head, causing him to fall back into the water.
"Ask a stupid question, Noah," Scarlett said.
Confession Outhouse
Shawn: I was surprised they brought the zombie back this season! I mean, when I heard there were only fifty-one contestants coming back, I naturally assumed they were leaving out Ezekiel, you know, being undead and all. I'm going to have to sleep very carefully now. I do wonder who's been left out, though. (Shawn shrugs.) Probably Blaineley. She's kind of old, and I don't think anyone liked her anyway.
"And the twenty-first contestant to step off the boat, the beautiful, irreplaceable, undeniable, Blaineley! Yeah!" Blaineley announced upon stepping off the boat.
"You needn't take over my hosting duties," Chris said, pushing Blaineley aside. "Gonna' have enough problems on that front when Topher gets here."
"So, how are my favorite teammates doing?" Blaineley asked the others, wearing a big, fake smile.
"Cut the crap," Courtney said, irritated. "You don't like us, we don't like you, everyone knows it."
"Not everyone," Alejandro said, taking Blaineley's hand and kissing it. "Some of us know to treat a lady with the respect she deserves."
"Thank you," Blaineley said. "At least someone here can treat a lady with class.
Confession Outhouse
Alejandro: I would like to point out that Blaineley is far more attractive on TV than she is in person. It's like flirting with my grandmother. (Alejandro shudders.)
"Heather," Chris said, as Heather walked off the boat, looking as if she were expecting everyone else there to bow down to her.
Heather pointedly ignored Alejandro and went straight over to Gwen. "Gwen, it's so nice to see you," Heather said, with obvious insincerity in her voice.
"Yeah," Gwen said, sounding like she wanted Heather to go away. "What do you want?"
Heather fake gasped, seemingly pretending to feel hurt. "Gwen, what makes you think I want something? I only realized that I have not treated you well in the past, and I think you, Courtney, and I could become close friends."
"I'm OK with that!" Courtney blurted out. "I mean, the friends with Gwen part, anyway… we can work something out there, I mean, yes, something." Courtney looked embarrassed. "I'll get out of the way." Courtney 'inconspicuously' slid over to Noah, looking at what he was reading. "What'cha got there, Noah?" Noah irritatedly turned his body away from Courtney.
Confession Outhouse
Gwen: I really don't know what Heather's up to, but I'm not interested. And getting Courtney involved just makes me less interested.
Heather: I don't like Gwen, and Gwen doesn't like me. That isn't going to change. But I'm here to win, and whether I like it or not, Gwen and I are the most powerful duo the game has ever seen, and with Courtney on the side, we can be unstoppable!
Courtney: I'm not too crazy about Heather, but I really do miss Gwen-I don't really have many girl friends-or friends, period-and if Heather can act as a middleman to get us to work together, I could be convinced to work with her.
"Hey, Duncan!" Chris exclaimed, as Duncan stepped off the next boat. "I was reluctant to get you released after blowing up my house, but what can I say? You're a fan favorite. I can't argue with that."
Duncan shrugged, then walked over to Gwen, smirking. Gwen blushed, but looked uneasy. Courtney was watching their interaction intently.
"Next up, Sierra!" Chris exclaimed, as Sierra stepped off the boat.
"Cody!" Sierra exclaimed, and rushed over to practically strangle Cody with a hug. Then quickly letting go. "Oops, sorry Cody. I got a little over-excited."
"It's OK, Sierra," Cody said. "It's been a while, you were excited to see me again."
"Thanks, Cody," Sierra said, giving Cody a more gentle embrace. Though still not letting go, for a while. Cody just seemed to go along with it.
Confession Outhouse
Sierra: I still really really really like Cody. I just need to figure out how to win Cody without scaring him off. I'm smart. I can do it!
"Welcome, Bridgette!" Chris exclaimed, as Bridgette stepped off the boat onto the dock, and made her way over to Courtney.
"Hey, Courtney," Bridgette said. "How have-"
"No one cares, let's welcome Scott!" Chris exclaimed, as Scott stepped off the next boat, and took in a deep breath.
"Ah, smells nice to be back here," Scott said. "And I'm going to win this season, and I'm going to do everything I can to win." Dawn broke out of her meditative state to shoot a glare a Scott.
Sugar looked at Scott with stars in her eyes. "Now he's pretty dreamy…" Sugar shook her head, then slapped her face. "Focus girl. You're not here for boys. You got plenty of hot guys fightin' for ya' back home."
Amy rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, and blew into her hair. "I'm sure," she said to herself.
"Well, we're past the halfway point now," Chris announced. "And at number twenty-seven, meet Lindsay!"
Lindsay stepped off the boat, looking confused, as often. "Hi. I'm really happy to see you all again." Lindsay glared at Heather. "Most of you. But especially Tyler!" Lindsay ran up to Tyler and glomped him, and kissed him hard. "I remember you!"
"All right!" Tyler exclaimed.
"I tried, like, really really hard to remember which one was you," Lindsay said, gleaming. "I studied so hard, but I know you're Tyler!" Lindsay re-glomped Tyler. Scarlett looked as if she were studying Lindsay.
Confession Outhouse
Scarlett: It's incredible that someone like Lindsay could actually exist. I am curious as to how that mind works. She does not appear to be developmentally disabled, but I'm not sure how else to explain her extreme level of stupidity.
Amy: I thought Lindsay could make a good ally. Pretend to be her friend, use her to do my bidding, throw her away when the time comes… she'd be perfect!
"Lindsay," Amy said, faking excitement, shaking Lindsay's hand. "It's, like, so nice to meet you!"
Lindsay looked irritated, and snapped her hand away. "Leave me alone, Samey!"
Confession Outhouse
Amy: (face palms) And of course she thinks I'm my idiot sister! Urgh! She's so stupid she doesn't even know it's me trying to trick her and not Samey!
Tyler: I'm… I'm not sure what happened there. I can't really tell which one's Amy and which one's Samey by looking at them, but I do know Samey was the nice one, so I'm not sure why Lindsay snapped at her like that.
"Cameron, everyone," Chris said, yawning. "In case someone cares, I guess."
"Hi," Cameron said, and was quickly glomped by Sierra.
"Hi Cameron!" Sierra squealed, then let Cameron go. "Now, I don't mean to break your heart, but secretly, I kind of like Cody. I mean, you're a good guy and all, but Cody's just Codylicious!"
"I'll be OK," Cameron said. "The bones in my body will be OK, too."
"Huh?" Sierra asked, confused, but didn't question it, and went back over to Cody, caressing him some more.
"Now let's make things awkward with contestant twenty-nine, Trent!" Chris exclaimed, as Trent stepped onto the dock. "You notice what I did there, emphasizing the nine part? You know, the nine in twenty-nine? OK, you all obviously don't remember the whole Trent being obsessed with nine thing."
Lindsay stopped kissing Tyler for a moment. "Tyler, you were obsessed with the letter nine?"
"That was Trent," Tyler said. "I'm Tyler." Lindsay looked ashamed of herself. "Don't feel bad," Tyler said, and started to kiss Lindsay again, which seemed to lift her spirits.
Trent looked to Chris, then looked down. "I'd… rather forget that."
"I'd rather not forget, though," Chris said. "Remember how you were worried about losing Gwen? And then you did lose Gwen, and she cheated on you with Duncan?" Chris wiped a tear from his eye. "Nostalgia gets to me." Trent looked like he wanted to disappear.
"Cheer up, buddy," Cody said, slapping Trent on the back. "It's not just you. She doesn't really like me or Duncan either." Trent looked like he wanted to disappear even more.
Sierra pulled Cody away. "Cody, you're making him feel bad." Sierra pushed Cody's head into her chest. "You should make me feel good instead of making someone else feel bad." Cody shrugged and seemed content with the thought.
Ezekiel climbed back onto the dock, looking in high spirits. "You all better watch out, 'cause I'm here to win, eh."
"Next is Anne Maria!" Chris exclaimed, as Anne Maria stepped off the next boat.
"Now I'm here to win this… you!" Anne Maria looked angrily at Ezekiel, then threw him off the dock. "What a loser, that one. But I'm here to win, and look beautiful doing it." Sugar chuckled, which caught Anne Maria's attention. "Oh, you think I was jokin'?"
Sugar rolled her eyes. "Well obviously. One, you can't win, and three, look at me. And look at you. I'm clearly the beautiful one."
Anne Maria shot a death glare to Sugar, who returned the favor. "Oh, it's on."
Confession Outhouse
Sugar: That Anna Maria don't know who she's messin' with. I know her type, the beauty queen who ain't all that pretty and not as smart as she think she is, but she's all bluster. She ain't gonna' take my crown away from me!
Duncan: That was pathetic. Going at each other over nothing. I mean, at least wait until the competition to get at each other's throats. (Duncan had a sly grin on his face.) And Anne Maria is clearly hotter. Is that even a real question? That's like asking between me and Owen who's hotter. No one's gonna' really pick Owen.
"I choose you, Owen!" Izzy exclaimed, leaping on Duncan's head.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Duncan said, annoyed, pushing Izzy off of him. "And Owen isn't here yet."
"Oh, but we will be," Izzy said, then started laughing maniacally. She then slithered over, quite literally, to Scarlett, and stole her glasses.
"Hey!" Scarlett shouted, trying to reach for her glasses, though Izzy was keeping them away.
"Can I use these? I want to be evil this season, and with these glasses, I look like an evil version of you! Ooh, except I can't see very well out of these." Izzy was getting dizzy, and fell down.
"Give me those," Scarlett said, annoyed as she snatched the glasses back and put them back on.
"All right, next we have Staci," Chris said, as Staci stepped off the boat.
"You know, my great great great great grandfather invented islands," Staci said. "Not a lot of people know that, but it's true. Before that, people had to-"
"No one cares," Courtney complained.
"You know my great great great great grandmother invented the phrase 'no one cares,'" Staci said. "You know, it's really surprising how often that phrase comes up in conversation."
"Somehow, I can believe it," Courtney stated, clearly annoyed.
"Thirty-four is Jasmine!" Chris exclaimed, as Jasmine stepped onto the dock. "Now say something like 'crikey'!"
Jasmine gave Chris an annoyed look. "I'll pass."
"Wasn't she only thirty-three?" Courtney asked. "You skipped a number."
"No, pretty sure I didn't," Chris said.
"He didn't," Dawn assured Courtney, then turned back to B and gave him a small hug. "How have you been?"
"Oh," Courtney said, a bit confused. "When did B get here?"
"When you clearly weren't paying attention," Chris said, annoyed.
Confession Outhouse
Scarlett: I am uncertain when Beverly, or B as he prefers to be called, arrived at the island. Though Courtney really should know by this point that Chris is only going to deliver frustrating non-answers. As smart as she is, she has no control over her base emotions. It's a pity, really.
Noah: I've been paying close attention. But I also really don't care.
"Is that Amy or Samey over there?" Jasmine asked, not really being able to see Amy's face.
"It's Amy, stupid, geez!" Amy shouted, turning around to glare at Jasmine. "I don't even know why you'd want to see my stupid sister, anyway!"
"Well, we're friends," Jasmine said.
Amy narrowed her eyes. "Samey told me that you're the worst person she's ever met, and she hates you."
Jasmine yawned. "Don't believe you."
Amy's eye twitched. "Fine, don't believe me! You'll be sorry!"
Jasmine shrugged, then walked over to Shawn. "Hey, Shawn."
"Hey," Shawn replied, blushing a bit. "You haven't been infected by the undead recently, have you?"
"Nope," Jasmine said, as she bent down to embrace him.
"Yeah, enough with the mushy stuff," Chris said. "How about more focus on me!" Chris continued smiling for the camera, when a hand eventually waved in front of him.
"Hello, aren't you going to introduce me?"
"No, rather not. I like the focus being on me." Chris pointing proudly to his face.
"That's a shame," Scarlett stated, looking the newcomer up and down. "I was really hoping they hadn't found a cure. I was hoping to study your condition."
"Dakota didn't like," Dakota said. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I appreciate that Sam didn't mind, but it's really nice to be back to my original hot self."
"Aww, didn't get your lab rat to play with?" Noah asked, looking up from his book, with a sly grin toward Scarlett, who irritated shoved the book back in his face.
Dakota stepped right in front of Chris, with Chris trying futily to shove her away. "Anyway, it's time to let you all bask in the real star of Total Drama Fifty-Two-"
"Fifty-One!" Chris shouted.
Dakota cupped her hand around her mouth. "Don't listen to him, I counted. Presenting the real star of the show, the one, the only-"
"This season, on Total Drama Fifty-Two!," someone else announced, stepping in front of Dakota, "you will have a brand new host replacing the older model, me! Topher!" Topher was announcing, and Chris was turning red behind him and Dakota. "In charge of these other kids competing in exciting challenges, and-"
"Move it!" Chris screamed, shoving Topher into the water. "You are not the host and you will never be the host!" Chris looked to Dakota. "And you can join him!" Chris shoved Dakota into the water as well… or tried to. Dakota didn't budge, though. "OK, seriously, how much do you weigh?"
"Chris, you don't ask a girl her weight," Courtney said, glaring at Chris. Scarlett looked intrigued.
Confession Outhouse
Scarlett: Perhaps Dakota has not been completely cured. This could be interesting.
Noah: Sorry Dakota, looks like you've just become Scarlett's little lab rat whether you like it or not. It couldn't have happened to a more obnoxious person.
"And here's Leshawna," Chris announced, as Leshawna walked onto the dock, looking confident.
"Hey, my peeps!" Leshawna exclaimed, walking over to Gwen. "How's my main girl been up to?"
Gwen shrugged. "All right, I guess. All things considered."
"Here's Leonard!" Chris announced, as Leonard stepped onto the dock.
"It's the wizard!" Sugar exclaimed. "Hey, wizard!" Sugar rushed over to the wizard.
"He's not a real wizard," Courtney said, sounding frustrated. Scarlett put her hand on Courtney's shoulder, shaking her head. Courtney just sighed.
"I dunno'," Chris said, rubbing his chin. "If he's not a real wizard, explain how he just conjured up Lightning!" Chris dramatically pointed toward Lightning, who'd just stepped off the boat.
"Sha-Lightning!" Lightning exclaimed, flexing his muscles.
Courtney slapped her face in frustration. "That's just his name, it's… it's…" Courtney was trailing off as Scarlett put her hand on Courtney's shoulder once more, shaking her head no. Courtney sighed.
Confession Outhouse
Courtney: Scarlett's right. I really should let little things like that not bother me.
Scarlett: To be perfectly honest, Chris was bothering me a lot, too. But if Courtney wants to win, she needs to find a better release for that anger. Aside from evil, of course.
"And forty blocks from his home, here's Harold!" Chris announced, with a lot of blank stares in reply. "You know, 'cause he's the fortieth contestant to arrive, and all? Oh, forget you all."
"Hey, Leshawna," Harold said, trying to put on his swagger. And trip on a wooden plank, falling into the water. Harold then immediately leapt out, wrapping himself around Shawn's body. "There's a zombie down there!"
"Zombies?!" Shawn yelled, then started panicking, running around in circles, until Jasmine caught him and held him in place.
"Look," Jasmine said, "there are no zombies here. There's a perfectly rational explanation for… whatever it was he saw."
Shawn gulped, but then looked comforted. "Thanks. You're probably right."
Confession Outhouse
Jasmine: Everyone knows that zombies aren't real… but then, it really wouldn't surprise me if Chris had underwater robot zombies built just to freak Shawn out. I trust Chris about as far as I can throw… well, actually, a lot less than I could throw him. (Jasmine put on an innocent smile.)
Lindsay: I wish zombies were real! I'd love to get to talk to my Grandmama again!
"Ten hut!" Chris shouted. "Here's Brick!"
"Good day, everybody," Brick announced. "I am ready for another season of this, and I hope to assist any of you who I may share a team with."
"Can't wait," Amy said, sounding bored. "You sound like a party."
"It isn't going to be a party," Brick said, looking toward Amy. "It's going to be war out there, with General McLean as the enemy."
"Hey!" Chris shouted, but then shrugged. "Actually, I kinda' like that. General McLean. Yeah, I'm good with that, never mind."
"Don't really care," Amy said.
"Well, if you want a party, then here's your guy, the meaning life, the universe, and everything, Geoff!"
"Whoo-hoo!" Geoff exclaimed, fist-pumping. "This party is going to be major with all of you guys!" Geoff walked over to Bridgette. "And especially my girl." Geoff gave Bridgette a kiss on the cheek, causing Bridgette to blush.
"Whoo-hoo," Scarlett said flatly, looking unimpressed.
"You owe me royalties on that one, honey," Noah stated, pointing a finger into the air, not looking up from his book.
"Aww, put that book away," Geoff said. "It's time to paaaar-tay!"
"No."
Geoff took out what looked like a cookie. "Would you do it for a Noah snack?"
"Dog food," Scarlett said. "Is this man a complete moron?"
"Hey!" Bridgette shouted, glaring at Scarlett.
"Yes," Noah answered.
"Oh, come on!" Bridgette shouted, getting more irritated.
"Bridgette?" Dawn said, looking over to Bridgette. "Are you all right?"
Bridgette motioned her hands across her body. "I'm good."
Confession Outhouse
Bridgette: Who does… whatever her name is think she is?! She doesn't know Geoff, and she's evil! I watched last season!
Dawn: I have to say, I was eager to meet Bridgette. I feel I could connect with her on a deeper level than most of the other contestants, though something seems to be bothering her.
"Why did you bring a video game with you, Sam?" Chris asked, taking the game away from Sam. "We're not allowing that here."
Sam looked sad, but cheered back up when he saw Dakota. "Dakota!" Sam ran over to embrace Dakota, and Dakota hugged back… somewhat crushing him.
"Oops… Dakota sorry," Dakota said, blushing. "I'm still getting used to this."
"Don't worry, I'll be by your side," Sam said. "Without my games, though."
"You'll get to play them soon," Dakota said, smiling.
"Everybody, DJ. DJ, everybody," Chris said, as DJ stepped onto the dock.
"Hey guys," DJ said, high-fiving Geoff and Duncan. "Really hope I can make my mama proud here."
"Yeah, I wouldn't count on it," Chris said. "Next up, Beth!"
"Hi, Lindsay," Beth said, smiling as she walked over to Lindsay, who picked her up and hugged her.
"Betty!" Lindsay exclaimed. "I'm so happy to see you!"
"Wait, is that Zoey?" Mike asked, sounding like he couldn't wait to see Zoey.
"No, it's… Beth. Do you honestly not know the difference between your girlfriend Zoey and Beth?!" Courtney shouted.
Amy smirked. "Seem like practically the same person to me."
"Yeah yeah, blah blah, Rodney!" Chris announced, as Rodney stepped off the next boat. Rodney looked around, confused.
"Don't make a sound," Scarlett said quietly to Courtney. "Trust me on this."
"Isn't he the loser who fell in love with every girl on the show last season?" Heather asked, annoyed. "Lame."
Rodney looked to Heather with hearts in his eyes. "So beautiful… so perfect… so goddess."
"Yeah, it's about time somebody acknowledged the goddess that I am," Heather said, not sounding like she cared that much.
Confession Outhouse
Courtney: I would say poor Heather, but no, not really.
Izzy: I would say poor Heather, but… wait, I just did say poor Heather. Ack! I said it again… but not that time, ha, Izzy caught on to Izzy's little game, and I'm not going to say poor Heather any-gah!
"All right, is everyone here yet?" Jo asked, impatient. "I want to get this started so I can hurry up and win this thing."
"We'll move on when I'm good and ready," Chris said, annoyed.
Confession Outhouse
Zoey: (crying) Mike!
"And to give Jo a little competition, here's Eva!" Chris announced, as Eva pounded her way onto the dock.
"It's about time they let me back on this show," Eva said, pounding her fists together, and got right in Heather's face. "And I would've won if it wasn't for you!"
Heather gulped. "That was so… so… so long ago. We all make mistakes."
"And you keep making 'em," Eva said, glaring death straight into Heather's eyes.
"Look," Chris said, "I know you want to kill Heather-everyone wants to kill Heather-but can you please wait until we get settled in, at least? I don't want everyone to get killed on our first show."
Eva grumbled, then stomped off, standing beside Dawn, who looked concerned. "Eva?" Dawn asked. Eva barked at Dawn. "Never mind," Dawn said sweetly.
"And next is fan-favorite Owen!" Chris announced, as Owen ran down the dock.
"Hey guys!" Owen exclaimed. "Ready to have some fun?"
"Owen's a fan favorite?" Amy asked, incredulous. "You're kidding. Isn't he a little… fat?"
"Really?" asked Owen, baffled by the comment.
Amy slapped her own face. "Idiots."
"All right, I would like Sky to step forward," Chris said, then looked around. "Um, anyone see Sky?"
Courtney looked behind her. "Sky, you can do this. You're strong. You can handle this."
Sky nodded. "Come with me, please?"
"I didn't say… oh, OK," Courtney said, being dragged along with Sky.
"I guess you knew he was coming," Chris said, smirking. "I'm sure Dave is anxious to meet you."
"Not really," Dave said, limping past Sky and Courtney, going to the far end of the dock, just looking longingly into the water.
"That's too bad," Chris said. "I was expecting more fireworks. Ah well, we've got plenty of time for that."
"You'll get through this," Courtney assured Sky, who seemed happy to have someone by her side.
Confession Outhouse
Sky: I don't really like having to rely on someone, but honestly, I'm nervous about talking to Dave after… well, that whole trying to kill me thing. (Sky tapped her chin.) There really were a lot of people out to get me last season, weren't there? (Sky chuckled a bit.)
Gwen: Sky and Courtney seem to be getting along. I mean, I don't want Courtney to have to be miserable all the time, but once Courtney remembers this is a game, she's going to betray her.
"And we have just one more contestant left," Chris said.
"This must be Zoey!" Mike exclaimed. "I've been waiting and waiting and waiting, and we shall finally be reunited!"
"Yeah, Zoey's already here," Scarlett stated matter-of-factly. She went looking for you on the island. Who knows where she is now. Probably got eaten by something."
"Wha-what?!" Mike cried out. "She's here?!"
"Yeah, did I forget to mention that?" Chris said, smiling wide. "Whoopsie."
"Zoey!" Mike yelled, as he ran toward the island, and soon out of sight, searching for Zoey.
"You knew where Zoey was?" Gwen asked. "Why didn't you just tell Mike?"
Scarlett shrugged. "What can I say? I'm evil."
"Aww, I wanted to be evil first!" Max declared. "You, with the grey shirt!" Max pointed right in front of Courtney.
Courtney shook her head in the palm of her hand. "What is it?"
"Your boyfriend Duncan is lost on the island somewhere. You should run off and look for him."
Courtney looked exasperated. "One Duncan is right over there."
Duncan waved slyly. "Hi."
Courtney glared at Duncan, then turned back to Max. "Two, he is no longer my boyfriend. And three, I'm not an idiot!"
"Well, excuse me," Max said. "I didn't have time for something better."
Courtney turned to Scarlett. "I'm sorry you had to put up with him last season."
"I see it my penance," Scarlett said, smirking.
"And here is our final contestant, Samey," Chris said, as Samey stepped onto the dock, and immediately latched onto Jasmine.
"Jasmine!" Samey cried out. "I really missed you!"
"It's nice to see you again, Samey," Jasmine said, hugging back.
Amy rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. She's using you, Jasmine!"
Lindsay angrily grabbed Amy. "Shut. Up! Samey!"
Amy pushed herself off Lindsay. "I am not Samey!"
Confession Outhouse
Amy: Look, I can understand unbridled hatred toward Samey-she's totally awful and all-but I'm not her! I'm the superior one! Me!
Courtney: So, am I the only one who found it odd that Jasmine called her Samey, and not Sammi?
"And that's everyone!" Chris exclaimed. "All fifty-one past contestants, now let's hurry off the dock, move it, people!"
Courtney had a sly grin on her face. "Don't you want to take a cast picture first?"
"Are you kidding?" Chris asked. "This can't support all our weight. I'm surprised it's still standing, really."
"Oh, I think it can support our weight for a little bit longer," Courtney said.
"No, it really can't, let's move!"
Confession Outhouse
Sky: I really didn't know what Courtney was up to, but once we figured it out, I realized Courtney really can be a pretty cool person.
Duncan: Yeah, it turned out Courtney took part in drafting the contracts for the season. And she scares me.
Noah: And thank you, Courtney, for making the season twenty percent more annoying.
"Hurry up already!" Chris shouted. "All fifty-one of us here-"
"What about Mike and Zoey?" Cameron asked.
"They're already on the island, move it!"
"Wait a minute," Sugar said, looking like she was thinking hard about something. "Aren't we-"
"I know, Sugar, now move!"
"Are those dolphins?" Bridgette asked, looking out into the ocean.
"Doesn't matter, let's move!" Chris shouted, panicking more.
"Courtney, I think we should listen to the not-so-nice man," Scarlett said.
"Everyone who gets onto the island gets a meal of their choice!" Chris shouted.
Confession Outhouse
Chris: (shaking his head) I was a desperate, desperate man.
"That everyone except Courtney?" Chris asked. "Yeah, even Zeke's here. Courtney, you don't get anything if you stay there."
"I know," Courtney said.
"Eva!" Chris exclaimed. "You'll be safe until the merge if you get her off that dock! And fast"
Eva cracked her knuckles, as Courtney was looking out into the ocean, as the dolphins were getting closer. Courtney was taken by surprise, as Eva dragged her back to the island, but not without a struggle. "You are stronger than you look."
"Let me go!" Courtney demanded. "She's almost here!"
"Sorry, I need immunity," Eva said, and she dropped Courtney onto the island.
"Your plan didn't work," Chris said, smirking. "Everyone is on the island proper now." Chris smirked. "Such a silly little clause. Not sure why you had that added into the contract."
"I don't really trust you," Courtney said.
"Well it didn't work," Chris said. "We're all on the island itself, so no new contestants can join the game, out of fairness to those already here."
"What if someone's still on the dock?" Dawn asked, still sitting on the dock.
"Well, if someone was still on the dock, then-what?!" Chris yelled. How did… but… how did I miss you?! You went back onto the dock, didn't you?! That doesn't count!"
"You can check the tapes, Chris," Dawn said cheerfully, and waved toward the ocean. "Hi Ella!"
"No, no, no!" Chris stomped his foot. "Not again. Never again!"
The dolphin stopped at the dock, and Ella stepped off, patting the dolphin on the head. "Thank you, kind creature."
Confession Outhouse
Dawn: I didn't understand the contracts completely. I did know Courtney had a good reason for doing what she was doing, though, and if it meant sacrificing a good meal for a good cause, it was worth doing.
"Fine, happy now?" Chris grumbled. "Now you have one more contestant you have to beat to win the game, happy?"
"I'm sorry, Chris," Ella said. "My boat didn't come, but fortunately, the beautiful ocean life helped to give me a hand to get me here."
"Yeah, that's too bad," Chris said. "Shame when that happens. Important this is that you made it, though. Sugar, you can blame Courtney. And Dawn, but mostly Courtney."
Sugar looked confused. "Blame her for what?"
Confession Outhouse
Sugar: I'm not really sure what we're supposed to be blaming Courtney for. I blame Ella though. I don't know what she did, but I know she's the one who done it.
Scarlett: I am really not sure why Courtney wanted Ella here. I knew what she was doing, of course, but I really didn't know why. Frankly, she's kind of annoying. Courtney doesn't do things "just because," though, and I want to know why she did it.
"And that's everyone," Chris said. "All fifty-two of you. Whoo."
"So when's lunch?" DJ asked. "I'm hungry."
"There is none!" Chris yelled.
"But you said-"
"I lie a lot! Can't you see I'm not in the mood?!" Chris started breathing in and out, trying to calm himself down. "Chef's cooking up something disgusting in the cafeteria. You all should go and eat something while I try to figure things out."
Chris walked back onto the dock, massaging his forehead. "Yeah, I wasn't really looking forward to Ella, and I kind of wanted an Ella-free season. Which I'm not getting." Chris sighed, then put on a smile. "Fortunately, someone will be leaving very shortly, but who? Ella, if we're lucky? Find out later, on Total Drama Fifty-One!"
"…sigh. Total Drama Fifty-Two." Chris started to sob.