Yesterday, my best friend confessed his love for me.

"I don't expect an answer right now. But I need to tell you how I feel before I explode. The thing is, you're the first person I think of every morning, the last I think of every night, and you feature in the middle a lot, too. Everything I do is for you. Haru, I- I love you. I think I always have, even when we were kids. I just thought you should know, even if I'll never be enough for you."

He walked away like a man sentenced to death. Why doesn't he know how amazing he is? Even if I was blind, I'd still be able to see the kindness radiating from his every pore. My parents don't even want me, so why does he? I'm just a waste of his time; time that could be spent loving someone who isn't broken.

I don't deserve to be loved.

When it's just me and the water, I could probably solve anything if I tried. My bathtub was the only place I could feel truly safe when my parents first left for Nagoya, but Makoto would be the closest thing outside my little world.

"For fuck's sake, Haru, you're going to grow gills if you keep living in the tub like that." Why is Rin Matsuoka in my bathroom? We are barely on speaking terms. He is not Makoto. Why am I thinking about Makoto so much?

"Rin? What are you doing here?"

"That little idiot begged me to come see what was up with you. I only came because I figured we could race if I dragged your sorry ass out of the tub. Water is the only way to get through to a water freak like you."

"I didn't know Nagisa ever texted you."

"Yeah, he sends me a bunch of dumb shit. About his day, his sisters, stuff about 'Rei-chan,' and one was just 'RINRINRINRINRINRIN' over and over. So annoying."

If I were a person who normally laughed, I certainly would be doing so now. He sent those same texts to Makoto and me, including a very strange one where he called himself Big Penguin. We never asked about that.

"You coming or what?" Might as well. I get to swim, and Rin is surprisingly good with relationships.

I don't deserve to have someone as selfless as Makoto anywhere near me.

I lost.

"Okay, now you have to tell me what's wrong with you. The winner insists."

I might as well just say it. When Makoto and I start dating, he will hear about it eventually, anyway. I'd rather he hear it from me. Wait, when we start dating? When was this decided?

"Makoto confessed to me yesterday."

Wait, why is he laughing? I don't think this news is especially funny! "It's about fucking time! I was starting to think that the big idiot would never grow a pair! So is that it? You two have been married since we were kids!"

Is Rin okay? His face is nearly as red as his hair, he can barely breathe and he sounds like a dying animal. His eyes look a little wet, and it only makes me miss our childhood, when he was like this all the time. And he's delusional now, too- I would remember an important event like getting married to Makoto.

"But we aren't-"

"Yes, you two are married! Do you see any other guys our age do things like sharing popsicles or going into each other's bathrooms when they know the other could be naked or looking at each other as much as you two do? Face it; you two have been married since before I met you. I thought you morons would never get your heads out of your own asses long enough to see that!"

"Hey, look, it's the homo brigade!"

"I bet they don't even really swim. They just have orgies every day."

"Yeah, right. Nanase and Tachibana would never let go of each other."

"And did you see the way that first year shota converted Ryugazaki? They must be a gay cult. Poor cute Matsuoka in first year must have been brainwashed! I need to save her!"

Now that I think about it, Rin does have a point.

I couldn't deny it anymore. I needed to see him.

But if he's decided that I'm the one that makes him happy, who am I to take that away?

I did my daily phone check. I got a text message- from Rei?

From: Rei Ryugazaki

Haruka-senpai? I know you don't check your messages much, but I would like to speak with you on a rather urgent manner. If you get this, please meet me in the library during lunch. –Rei

PS. Good luck with Makoto-senpai.

To: Rei Ryugazaki

Sure. I'll be there tomorrow. -Haru

Makoto will understand.

I just hope Rei knows what he's getting into.

I reached Makoto's, and after Ran and Ren danced around me for about five minutes, I finally asked where Makoto was.

"He's out back. He asked us not to disturb him."

This is not a good sign. I went to his porch to see him with his head down. He looks so sad, I should stroke his hair or give him a backrub or-

"Ahem." The look in those normally sparkling green eyes makes me feel even worse about myself. When we were kids, I told myself I would never be the reason for Makoto's smile fading. And what do you know; I screwed it up just like everything else. Good job, Haru.

"You didn't go to school today, Haru. Did you come for notes?" I hardly ever take notes, and he knows that.

"I ran into Rin today. Actually, he came into my bathroom. He laughed at me and told me I was going to grow gills. He said Nagisa practically begged him to come see why I wasn't at school.

"We went over to Samezuka and raced. I lost, so he made me tell him what was wrong. When I said it, he laughed at me and said we were married.

"I never really noticed or cared before, but our friendship is very different from other guys our age. I guess my friendship with Rin is a lot more typical, since he mostly laughs at me and calls me a water freak. But if that's what normal is, then I don't want it. I just want you by my side. And after spending all day thinking about you, being together as friends may not cut it anymore."

I have never seen him so happy, and I've known him since we were six. Using a month's worth of words was worth it.

"Haru! Are you accepting my feelings?" He turned a bit pink around the ears. "Do you love me?" He almost whispered it, like he couldn't even dream that it would be true. He looks so adorable; I couldn't turn him down if I wanted to.

"Yes." My mouth was being attacked by a barrage of over enthusiastic kisses, but I had no intention of fighting back. "You're everything I need, and that's more than enough."

My inner voice gets quieter when Makoto is near.

I spent three days editing this. Hopefully that's enough!

"Big Penguin" is a reference to Texts from Gay Swimmers on Tumblr. It is one of my favorite things right now. The thing about Rei seems random now, but it'll make more sense come chapter- 4?

Updates on Fridays- probably.

Thanks for reading!

~Aurora