after yesterday, i thought it would be nice for americans to have something pleasant and happy for a distraction. (title from taylor swift's treacherous).
Danvers Sisters' Movie Night was supposed to be for sisters. Except that Maggie had shown up without warning at Alex's door, six pack in hand and charming smile in place, and Alex couldn't really have said no, now, could she? Not when Maggie was looking at her so intensely, when she was so close and genuine and actually here, for no reason other than that she wanted to see Alex. And when Kara bounded over to introduce herself and invite 'Alex's new friend' to join them, the decision was taken out of her hands anyway. Really, the only thing for Alex to do was step back and let Maggie saunter confidently into her apartment.
Now, hiding out in the kitchen under the guise of putting the beer in the fridge, Alex forces herself to breathe. By the time she walks out with three wine glasses in her hands, Kara has already got Maggie sitting in the middle of the couch, and the space left for Alex suddenly seems very, very small. She's never even considered it before, but suddenly she's wondering why her couch is so tiny, why she never splurged on something roomier?
Alex finds Maggie enchanting, but she finds her somewhat frightening too. She still doesn't know what to do with the way she feels when she's around her, what to make of the way Maggie looks at her and teases her and smiles at her; of what it is she might want. And being so close to her, in a dark, quiet room… Well, Alex may be freaking out a little bit. A lot. Whatever.
She kneels in front of her coffee table to fill their glasses, avoiding her fate for just a little while longer, and distracts herself with a gulp of wine. Alcohol can only help the situation, she figures.
"So what are we watching?" Maggie asks, tossing Alex another enchanting smile in thanks for the glass she hands over. Alex, emphatically, does not stare.
"We're rewatching Gilmore Girls," Kara answers. "Do you know it?"
"Oh yeah," Maggie says. "Lauren Graham can have her way with me any day."
Alex chokes. It's thankfully mostly drowned out by Kara's high pitched laugh and dreamy, "I love her!", but Maggie still catches it and smirks at her. Crap.
"You okay, Danvers?" she asks, false-sweetly. She is clearly enjoying this far too much, and it's incredibly unfair.
"Fine," Alex manages.
She's not fine. Holy shit is she so far from fine right now. What the hell is Maggie Sawyer doing to her?
"Alex, sit down," Kara instructs, totally oblivious to Alex's internal meltdown. Small mercies, she supposes. "Let's start."
No more avoiding it, then.
Alex resolutely does not look at Maggie as she squeezes herself into the too small space between the other woman and the arm of the couch. Their thighs press together. That really shouldn't be as overwhelming as it is. Maggie shifts and lays her arm along the back of the couch, which is understandable given her position, but no, no, that doesn't help Alex at all. She sits forward with her arms on her thighs, avoids Maggie's touch as much as possible, tries to focus on the show and not the heat of Maggie's body against hers.
She fails, pretty damn miserably.
Half way into the first episode, Kara pauses to declare, "Ice cream time!" and jumps up from the couch to fetch her dessert. Being alone with Maggie Sawyer is both something Alex desperately wants and is desperately, desperately afraid of at the same time. And it certainly does not help that Maggie takes the opportunity to lean in even closer to Alex.
"Do I scare you, Danvers?" she asks, voice innocent, but her eyes and smirk decidedly less so.
"No," Alex lies, fighting the urge to squirm uncomfortably.
Maggie laughs. Alex hates what her heart does at the sweet sound. "Really? It's just that you don't seem particularly comfortable." There's a challenge in her voice. Alex knows it. Maggie knows it. And Maggie knows Alex Danvers does not back down from a challenge.
Damn.
Well, Alex really has no choice now but to settle back into the couch and let her head rest against Maggie's arm.
"Now, was that so hard?"
Alex just turns to glare at her. Bad move, Danvers. Maggie's face is far too close to her own, her lips parted and too inviting, her eyes warm and…sparkly? Alex's glare freezes on her face. Oh no, she thinks. Oh, this is too much.
Kara's return is timely, her stomping steps drawing both their gazes. "I can't believe you only have one carton, Alex. Unacceptable!" Kara's pouting down at the ice cream in her arms, seemingly too concerned with Alex's poor offering to even notice her sister cuddled up to a woman she hardly knows. She collapses on the couch and starts Gilmore Girls up again, eating for a little while before passing the carton and a spoon along to Maggie.
"Are you going to feed me, Agent?" Maggie whispers to Alex. "I'm at a bit of a disadvantage." She flexes the arm trapped behind Alex's shoulder to demonstrate.
"Don't push your luck, Detective," Alex hisses back.
Maggie laughs, extracting her arm. Alex sighs in relief. Finally, some breathing room. Her reprieve is short lived though, because apparently nothing can go simply for Alex tonight.
Once they hand the ice cream back to Kara, Maggie lays her arm over the back of the couch again, but this time when Alex rests against her she immediately shifts to curve her arm around Alex's shoulder. Her fingers brush – unintentionally?! – against the side of Alex's breast and suddenly she can't breathe.
Help, she thinks. Dear god, help.
Danvers Sisters' Movie Nights usually go on for hours. How on earth is she going to survive this?
Thirty minutes of internally freaking out later and drinking maybe more than she should be, Alex figures she may as well just go with it. She's had enough wine by now that maybe she can relax and actually enjoy being this close to someone. Besides, her neck is starting to hurt from holding herself so stiffly, so it just makes sense to let her head fall to Maggie's shoulder and cuddle in closer to her.
Damn, she smells good too. Alex is so far gone, it's embarrassing really.
Maggie shifts again and there's no going back now, they're well and truly entwined at this point.
Alex can't remember the last time someone held her like this. It's a little overwhelming, how nice it feels. Maggie's hand traces up and down Alex's side, her touch light and meandering. Sometimes her fingers curve around to brush against the underside of Alex's breast or swirl over the outline of her hip. The movement is so slow, so without a distinct pattern or obvious intent, that Alex thinks it must be unintentional, that Maggie simply doesn't realise her fingers are just skirting the edge of where Alex suddenly aches for them to be.
It certainly seems like her focus is entirely on Gilmore Girls, when Alex turns her head to glance up at her. Maggie's profile is illuminated by the bluish light from the television, flickering unevenly over her face and highlighting first her round cheeks, then her chin, then the gleam in her pretty brown eyes. Alex is falling hard, and she's spent all night freaking out over that but right now with Maggie's arm around her she can't quite find it in her to care.
Maggie looks down to smile at Alex briefly, much more subdued than her teasing grins and smirks of earlier in the evening. Her hand travels up to run gently over the side of Alex's neck, along the outline of her ear. She's so soft, so much softer than Alex had ever imagined the brash and in your face detective would be. What does it mean, that Maggie is letting Alex see this side of her? And does Maggie have any idea that the tender way she's touching her right now is everything Alex has refused to let herself admit she wanted?
The episode draws to an end and when Kara doesn't immediately skip forward to the next one, Alex lifts her head from Maggie's neck to look past her, finding Kara sound asleep against the other arm of the couch, her hand tucked under her head.
Maggie laughs a little at the sight. "Your sister is really cute," she says.
"Oh." Alex's chest hurts very suddenly. "Well, uh, she is single." Maggie's actions were definitely unintentional then, and Alex needs to get herself out of her arms. She tries to pull away, but Maggie's grip tightens.
"I didn't mean it like that, Danvers."
"You didn't?"
"No." Maggie is studying her face, and Alex feels far too exposed, sure that she must be giving herself away. Her cheeks feel hot and Alex has never thought herself particularly attractive when she blushes. "You're really cute too, though." Maggie brushes Alex's hair away from her neck and leans forward to whisper in her ear, "And I do mean that exactly like you think."
Alex shivers, overcome. "Maggie…"
Maggie pulls back only marginally. "Too much?" she breathes.
"No." Alex shakes her head.
"Too soon?"
Alex looks at Maggie. She doesn't think she's ever seen anyone as pretty as she is. She doesn't think she's ever felt this much, especially this quickly, for anyone else before her. But Kara is right there and Alex… Alex is overwhelmed, to say the least. "Maybe," she admits.
Maggie let's her hand run from Alex's hair down her arm to touch her hand ever so gently. "Do you want me to go?"
Alex doesn't. She wants…she's not entirely sure right now. Something far too immense for her to comprehend at this time of night. "No. Not unless you want to."
Maggie's smile is disarming in its intensity; in the way it lights her whole face. It terrifies Alex, what that brilliant smile means, what it means that Maggie holds her arms out and Alex curls into her so willingly, so easily, what it means that Maggie holds her tightly and Alex breathes deep, deep into the sweetness of her neck.
This is so new. Alex has never done this before. She's hesitant as she wraps her arm around Maggie's waist, gripping at her shirt, and it's only Maggie's soft sigh that makes her think it was the right thing to do. It's new, and it's terrifying, but Alex wants it, she decides. So much. She wants to feel the warmth of Maggie's skin.
Maggie presses play on the next episode and Lorelai Gilmore's face fills the screen and Alex is, for now, content.