FAMILY
by Sky
Summary: No one would ever say that Tamaki's idea of a family was an entirely healthy one.
Rating: PG
Notes: This fic is based on the anime version.
Word count: 1320
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FAMILY
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Before Tamaki moved to Japan he had met his father precious few times in his life. And each of those times he remembers with clarity, but he also remembers that his father never really paid any attention to Tamaki. To his mother on the other hand...
Yuzuru would take Tamaki's mother on long romantic walks and fawn over her beauty, bringing her bouquets of wild flowers and heart-shaped chocolates from expensive shops. He never brought anything for his son, but Tamaki didn't mind. He was just happy to see the radiant smile lighting up his mother's face when she was with Yuzuru.
When left alone with Tamaki, there would be an awkward silence, which Tamaki would fill in with mindless chatter while his father stared out of the window obviously tuning him out. He would nod and excuse himself, saying he was not good with children.
Tamaki didn't really mind that either.
Maybe a little.
After moving to Japan, there was a slight change in their interaction. Tamaki was heartbroken for leaving his mother behind. He felt guilty and worried and excited about this new wonderful country and then guilty again for feeling excited. He wanted to tell his mother about all the new things he had seen and this smart new friend he had found. His first real friend. Mother would be so proud.
But he could tell none of those things and then he just felt sadness.
He spent days preparing stories about his life for his mother, so that he had them all memorized by heart in case he ever had a chance to tell them to her, but that chance never came.
He considered confiding in his father. He had never been close to father or didn't really know much about him at all, but they must get along because they were family.
He met his father once or twice a month. But most of those times he could not get a chance to be alone with him. Because grandmother was always there and she would always say bad things about Tamaki. He tried to be courteous and make polite conversations with her, but she would not give him a chance. She would glance at him with visible disgust in her eyes and demand of his father why was that bastard boy here again. When would she get a heir worthy of the family name and not this French half-breed.
And Tamaki tried not to get offended. But it hurt. He just couldn't help it.
There were a few times when he was alone with his father in the lounge room. They sat on the sofa, drinking tea and Tamaki decided to practise the stories he had prepared for his mother by telling them to father. He spoke with animated gestures, telling about this great idea to form a host club for girls in high school and how Kyouya would be in it too. And then he noticed how his father was doing it again. He was staring out of the window, not listening to a word Tamaki was saying.
"Do you miss mother?" Tamaki would ask.
Then his father would look at Tamaki, but not really look at Tamaki. He would extend his hand to caress his blond hair.
"You look so much like her. So beautiful..." And he would look at him with such intensity and love that Tamaki thought that his father was going to kiss him.
"Dad?" He would say. And his father would jerk his hand away and leave the room without saying a word. Tamaki would not see him again for another month.
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Sometimes they would have pretend-family dinners with just Tamaki, his father and grandmother. They would be mostly silent affairs, for after a while Tamaki had thought it best to remain silent because all he would receive in turn was "be quiet" from his father and biting insults from his grandmother. Then Yuzuru and his mother would discuss with quiet, serious voices about family affairs and business; subjects of which Tamaki had no idea about and that was the point.
Afterwards, his father would ride in the limousine back to the second mansion with Tamaki. Though, Tamaki wasn't sure why, because he never stayed there for more than five minutes. The limousine ride would be quiet as well. Tamaki always remembered the silence the best. The silence pushed and poked him until he had to open his mouth and say something, anything to fill the air of quietness that was suffocating his lively mind.
Except that sometimes his father would break the quietness as well. And speak things that were just under the surface and meant just for Tamaki's ears.
"Sometimes I despise her." Yuzuru would say it in such a quiet voice, it was almost as if he was embarrassed he wanted Tamaki to hear it.
It was one of the few times that Tamaki was the one to fall silent first.
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Shima-san would ask him, after three months at the new school, after three months of separation from his mother, if he had made any friends at the school. Tamaki would be very grateful. The only other person that would ever ask such questions from him would have been his mother and so he could pretend for a while, this is what it would be like if mother was around.
"Yes, shima-san. I have made a great friend, my best friend ever!" he declared and was pleased to see a maternal smile on shima-san's face. A small smile, but there it was nonetheless.
"I am glad, young master."
Of course, Tamaki was sometimes rather ashamed. The first few weeks in the new country, in the huge, huge mansion which was his all alone, he would sometimes wake up in the middle of the night and crouch on the floor next to his bed and cry so long and hysterically that the maids would wake up shima-san. She would lift him up from the elbows and guide him back to bed, pulling the covers over him. Then she would take an age-old linted handkerchief and dry his cheeks.
"Your mother would not want to see you this miserable, Tamaki-chan. You are a brave boy and tomorrow will be a new day. For now, just sleep and do not think what would have been."
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Tamaki shared a secret look with Kyouya after everyone else had left the music room.
Tamaki told Kyouya without sparing expressions, hand-gesturing and gratuitous floating flowers that he had known the host club would be a success all along. They had finished their first costume tea-party and Tamaki had been beaming with happiness. It was not just the attention he always craved, but it was the delighted smiles of the lovely girls, the sweet smell of Hani's freshly baked strawberry cake and the easy way the host club members worked together.
Tamaki felt something that he wasn't sure he had ever felt before. He wanted to ask his mother about that, but at the moment, it didn't hurt to think of her. It didn't hurt to not be near her, because he had discovered something else.
He belonged here.
"Kyouya. I'm so happy for our family! It was clear to me from the start, we belong together!"
"Family?" Kyouya had raised his eyebrow in a way that was so very Kyouya Tamaki wanted to hug him.
"Yes, yes! I'm the daddy and you're the mommy and we make everything work!"
"Hmm... I see."
Kyouya had turned to leave, but just by the door, he turned back. Tamaki saw the look on his face and it hurt his chest, because he would remember that rare look as long as he would remember his mother's love.
"You were right, this is going to work." Kyouya then smiled. Truly smiled.
And Tamaki knew without words how much it meant.
For him. For Kyouya.
For their new family.
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END
