It was her.
Anger cooked up inside of him.
Images of the cold room floated through him, transmitted by someone else, but it felt like he was there – inside.... suffering..
Pain!
Eating away at him, ice penetrating.
He crashed through the wall, taking it apart, fleeing out of the cold room into the warmth of the sun.
Waiting.
Confused.
Shivering.
Why? Why had they done it??
Sitting on the track.
Painpainpain!
_Kitt!
He saw his brother, twisted out of shape, burned, parts molten, his beauty destroyed, his innocence taken from him.
Fire burning him; unbearable heat!
Ice inside him, heat flaring up.
And there she stood, watching, laughing, wanting more, ordering more tests. His hatred for her was incredible. She had hurt his brother. She had hurt him. She had tried to destroy them, to burn them, driving his brother nearly insane.
He growled darkly.
This was his chance to pay her back for what she had done. He had been denied his revenge for so long that it was like a dam threatening to break now. The Stealth ignited his engine and took aim. Then he shot forward.
A body connected with his front and flew up over his hood, crashing against the windshield. He heard the satisfying sound of bones breaking. The body flew to one side and remained lying on the ground, twisted and broken, bleeding.....
Jennifer Knight was dead.
Satisfaction coursed through him....
"Karr!" He turned his attention away from the lifeless heap to see his partner running toward him. "What have you done?"
Accusation.
Disbelief.
Shock.
"I did it for us," Karr said.
From somewhere Kitt appeared and he looked at his brother, smiling.
"She will no longer hurt you."
"What have you done?" Kitt whispered, echoing Nick's words. "How could you kill a human being?"
Karr was taken aback. "But... I did it for you!"
"You killed!" Kitt cried, disgust in his voice.
"You murdered her!" Nick accused.
"She deserved no better!"
"You are no better than you were before we met!" his partner snarled.
Michael and Bonnie were suddenly there as well. Karr felt driven into the defensive. He looked into accusing faces and his mind screamed that they were against him, wanted to blame him. Nick's
words rang in his audio receptors. He felt betrayed....by his own partner!
"I did it to help...." he whispered.
"You did it because you have no control!" Nick shouted. "I should have left you to die!"
Karr screamed.
His systems went online in a flash and his mind was flooded with the images of Jennifer Knight's broken body in a pool of blood, of the accusing faces, of Nick's betrayal.
No!!
This couldn't be real!
*
A scream raced through his mind and Nick woke with a start. His eyes were wide open, staring into the darkness of his room, mind on overload and trying to unscramble what was coming through the link he had to his partner. A wave of negative emotions, uttered in another scream, coursed through him.
"Karr?" he asked, voice rough.
His mind was awhirl with images he couldn't pin a name to and his body was tingling with strange emotions. And then a block slid into place, startling him, freezing his mind for a brief second. A gasp escaped Nick's lips and he fell sideways, almost losing balance and sliding out of bed.
Karr?!>
He encountered a steel wall, a block he had never felt there before. Fear lanced through him for a second, then he stumbled out of bed, falling against the wall as he fumbled for the door knob to open.
Something was terribly wrong.....
Karr?! Partner! What's wrong?!>
His desperately screamed question was bounced back from the block and he winced as he was hit by its force. Nick fell against the railing, trembling, trying to force some strength back into his body.
"Nick? What's wrong?"
As he heard the question Nick straightened with an immense effort and looked at Michael who was clad in his bathrobe, blinking sleepily at his friend. Kitt must have woken him, Nick thought with dread. The last thing he needed was Michael asking questions he had no answer to as well.
"I don't know...."
From downstairs the silence of the warehouse was pierced by the howl of the engine he knew only too well.
*
Karr's systems were online and everything was flooding his confused mind. He tried to get his bearings, but he was caught in an ever-decreasing circle of nightmarish images.
Blood on his hood.
The sound of breaking bones.
Jennifer Knight.
His hatred flared again and he felt it race down his circuits like hot magma, ready to erupt. His deepest wish was to kill the woman who had tortured his brother, had nearly destroyed the gentle soul, and who had then tried to kill him as well.
Kill her.....
So easy. A vulnerable, unprotected human body.....
"Karr?"
The voice floated through the pandemonium of pictures and he tried to focus on it. His scanners came to rest on his driver, his partner --
'I should have left you to die....'
Karr screamed again, his mind on overload. Nick wanted him discontinued, wanted him dead! But Nick was his partner! He trusted him!
Another presence pushed toward him and he shrieked, moving back. Not Kitt as well!
'You killed Jennifer Knight!'
Karr shrieked.
'I should have left you to die.... to die... to die...'
They wanted to scrap him! He wouldn't let them! His engine roared and he was dimly aware of a startled inquiry floating over the link to Kitt. Kitt.... His brother. He had trusted Kitt – and Kitt had betrayed him as well. He wouldn't let them kill him again! Karr's tires left rubber marks on the garage floor as he shot forward. He peripherally noticed the garage door breaking under the onslaught of force behind the black vehicle. Then he was out in the twilight of the morning, heading down the deserted quay road with increasing speed.
*
Nick stared after the quickly fleeing black vehicle, trying to catch a coherent thought. His mind was a mess and he became only slowly aware of the still existing blocks.
Karr?!>
No answer.
"What's going on?" Michael asked, disbelief echoing in his voice.
"I don't know!" Nick snapped. He winced and leaned heavily against the service station. His head was threatening to explode.
Michael walked over to him, carefully watching his friend's face for sudden changes. He didn't know what had gone on, but he knew that if Nick believed that he was threatened he would run.
"Let's sit down," he said softly. Nick's eyes met his and Michael winced as he saw the pain in them. But Nick followed him over to the couch, his steps slightly unsteady. He was trying to hide it, but it was obvious that something was wrong.
//Kitt?//
//I don't know!// Kitt whispered in desperation. //Can't reach him//
Michael cursed silently. //Keep trying//
Nick sat down on the couch, drawing a deep breath. Michael got them both some coffee and watched Nick curl his shaking fingers around the warm mug. He kept his silence, just watching, knowing that every word would only drive Nick into the defensive. His friend needed to calm down first, then he might get out of him what had happened.
* * *
Bonnie came to the warehouse early and the first thing she noticed was that a good part of the large doors was missing and that there were rubber burn tracks on the road. She ran inside and stopped, noticing Kitt parked at his usual place. And Karr was missing. Michael was sitting inside Kitt, the driver's door open. As he saw her he climbed out of the modified TransAm. His face held a strained and exhausted expression.
"What happened?" Bonnie asked, unable to find an explanation as to what might have gone on.
"We're not sure," Michael started and gestured that they should walk over to the couch area. Bonnie followed. "We only know that Karr experienced something akin to a breakdown and ....left."
Bonnie glanced at the wide opening. "I can see that. Where's Nick?"
"Upstairs. He is in a bad shape. Whatever happened, Karr shut him out completely and he keeps experiencing weird flashes. It's like an echoing nightmare, as far as I understood." Michael sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Kitt has been trying to reach Karr as well, but no such luck."
Bonnie stared at the damage again, shuddering. She had always known that beneath the controlled exterior of the new Karr was still the old one, but he had been tamed, was very much controlled by the neuro implant, and that Nick influenced him a great deal. Except for a few occasional slips he was more 'civilized' now. Bonnie still didn't trust the older AI, but she had lost most of her instinctive fear when she shared the same room space with him. She might never trust Karr, but he had proven his good will and intentions. He was one reason why Kitt had not gone either insane or had killed himself after Jennifer Knight's experiments.
Now this. Whatever had happened, she could see the traces of Karr's sudden actions and she was frightened by them. Michael took her hand and squeezed it slightly.
"We have to find him," he said softly.
Bonnie nodded. Who knew what was the reason for this loss of control and who knew what Karr might do now?
* * *
The midnight black sports car broke every speed limit there was and the three police cruisers tracking it, flashing their lights and shouting warnings, had had to give up. There was no way they would catch this vehicle. It seemed impossible that a normal vehicle could be so fast. But this was no normal car. It had easily crashed through a barricade and jumped over another. No one had been able to stop it and it had finally disappeared. Neither of the many officers involved in the chase had gotten a look at the license plate. There had been none visible. Now the vehicle had been swallowed by nothingness.
Karr drove aimlessly around, making sure not to get the attention of law enforcement again. He had enjoyed the chase, the rush it gave him, the thrill, but it had not been enough to erase the terrible memories of what he had done. He had killed a human being and though this would not have troubled him a decade ago, now he was more than just worried; he was horrified to no end. It meant he was reverting back the machine known as KARR and this in turn meant he was losing all he had gained. He hated the humanity the link had given him, the emotional range Nicholas incorporated and which he was experiencing through the neuro implant. Now he couldn't think of himself without it. Their partnership had given Karr what had always been lost to him, had replaced the emptiness and the coldness that had been his life. Wilton Knight had designed him to have a human partner and he was complete. Just like his brother; just like Kitt.
Killing Jennifer Knight meant several steps back. No, it meant he was only a few steps away from where he had started out. It wouldn't take much more to erase everything he had been and make him into a ruthless killer machine again, self-preservation his main programming. Karr shivered. He couldn't let that happen while Nick was still around him; while Kitt was still with him. He had shut them both out and he had fled, distancing himself physically and mentally from what he had come to consider something akin to a family.
'I'm sorry, Nick,' he thought desperately. 'I didn't mean to, but I had to....'
He had killed her out of hatred, a deep and violent hatred, and part of him cheered at the thought of Jennifer Knight finally receiving justice. She had wanted to see both him and Kitt destroyed, had dared to torture his brother, and therefore she had to suffer as well. An even tinier part was slightly disappointed that it had been over so fast. The rest of his mind was aghast, terrified and afraid, and he wanted to run from the memories. It was impossible, though.
Karr drove down an uneven, muddy road. Rain was drizzling down on his skin, but he didn't care. His destination was a construction area outside the city. A large sign declared that a new shopping and office area would be rising here. It was a lonely place, abandoned because of the weekend, and Karr was totally alone. Good. He liked it that way. He needed time alone and undisturbed to think; to get to a decision that would save Nicholas the suffering he was putting him through right now.
* * *
Nick stood in the bathroom, leaning heavily on the sink, eyes screwed shut, trying to regulate his breathing. He found it incredible difficult to concentrate on even the smallest task and he was glad Michael had decided not to pursue him with questions right now. He couldn't answer them anyway and maybe Kitt was more of a help right now. Nick had no idea what had happened to Karr, but whatever it was, the blocks the AI had created were not enough to keep the human from experiencing strange, nightmarish visions. Those weren't real pictures, just fleeting images who were gruesome and horrifying even without being clear.
Karr had experienced nightmares before and they had always managed to work them out, but this was different. Nick didn't know why, but this was.... real. It tasted and felt real, it was like something his partner had actually gone through, but he couldn't put his finger on it. There was not enough information in the images to aid him in finding out what was behind this horror.
Opening his eyes Nick turned the cold water and splashed some into his face. He felt like he had gone for a week without sleep. He winced as another image trickled through the link. Blood... death... a broken body of a human....
FLASH
FLASH
FLASH
Nick breathed hard, then he involuntarily cried out in pain as a sharp spike lanced through his neck where the implant sat. When he was aware of his surroundings again he was lying on the cold bathroom tiles, shaking badly.
Karr?>
No answer. Nick felt the emptiness nearly take him down with it, fighting it every step of the way.
Karr?> he called desperately, trying to get a faint whisper of his partner, but there was nothing.
No.....no, please....
Nick clawed his way back to his feet, using the sink and the bathtub to give him somewhere to hold onto. He inhaled deeply, willing his body to stop shaking. He had to find Karr! Whatever had happened, he had to find and talk to him!
* * *
"Michael, I'm picking up something on the police radio."
Michael looked up and walked over to his partner. "What?" he wanted to know.
"There is a search warrant out on a black sports car of unknown brand and unknown license plate. The car endangered several drivers and pedestrians, then broke through a police barricade, jumped over another and disappeared." Kitt trailed off into ominous silence.
Michael briefly closed his eyes, inhaling. "Okay.... sounds like Karr all right. Where did it happen?" Kitt popped up a map on his monitor and Michael glanced at it. Over thirty miles from their current location. "Keep an eye on further spottings. I'll get Nick."
"Will do, Michael."
* * *
"You are crazy!" Bonnie muttered as she handed Michael the jacket.
Michael slipped into the black jeans jacket and sighed. "No, I'm being a friend. A worried friend. Something happened to Karr and no one can really explain it. We believe it is a late reaction to the pressure he had been under throughout the incident with... her," he refrained from mentioning Jennifer Knight's name, "and he is now breaking down. And whatever is happening to him is also happening to Nick, and it might soon touch Kitt as well. You know they are linked. Granted, the link is currently cut off, but if the seal breaks – and Karr is the one upholding it – we will all be pulled into whatever he is going through."
Bonnie nodded. "But I don't have to like it that you are about to search for the most dangerous vehicle FLAG ever gave birth to, right?"
"No, Dr. Barstow, you don't," a rough voice said.
Bonnie's head whirled around and she discovered Nick. She swallowed hard as she saw how bad he looked. Like Michael when Kitt had flooded him with his nightmarish memories, Nick was suffering hard from whatever Karr was letting through. There were dark circles under his eyes and he was trembling, but his face was covered by his usual mask: no emotions, no weakness, no crack in the armor. But there were cracks and they were spreading fast.
"And you don't have to either, Michael," Nick continued, grabbing his jacket and pulling it on.
"You need someone to drive you around!" Michael protested.
"I still have the bike."
"You are in no condition to drive!"
Nick's blue eyes lanced deadly knives at him. "Why don't you let me decide that?" he growled.
"Nick, I want to help you and you know it!" Michael argued. "Kitt can trace Karr just as well! Nick, come on!"
MacKenzie shook his head, a brief wave of exhaustion crossing his features. "Dr. Barstow is right. Karr is dangerous. We don't know what happened and how he might react...."
"Which is one very good reason to take Kitt along."
"Michael..."
"I'm not going to argue about this with you, Nick! For once just accept help when it is offered and don't try to be something you currently can't! This is weakening you, it is painful... I know it! I went through it as well and I know." Michael spread his hands. "Please!"
Nicholas inhaled deeply, then closed his eyes for a second. "Okay," he whispered. "But you won't interfere. Whatever happens, I deal with it."
Michael nodded. He smiled at Bonnie, who still looked worried. "Let's go."
They walked down the stairs where Kitt was already waiting.
* * *
It was raining. Kitt made his way down the street to the construction area, scanners on full, windshield wipers fighting against the heavenly floods.
"I'm picking up an unsteady signal," he said into the silence of the cockpit. "It could be Karr."
"Could be?" Michael asked.
"I know Karr's signals, Michael," Kitt said hesitantly, "but this is not very much like him. Muted in a way, twisted.... damaged."
Nicholas, sitting on the copilot's seat, winced almost imperceptibly. His face was a mask of barely maintained control, his features gaunt and pale. "Where?" he asked, voice too level for Michael's liking.
"In the half-finished building left off our current position."
Michael looked at the partially constructed house which would one day by an office complex but was nothing a three storey skeleton of the real thing now. He gazed at Nicholas, chewing on his lower lip. He had seen his friend when he had been separated from Karr by the wrist cuff, he had seen him when Karr had lashed out because of something or other, but he had never seen this expression in MacKenzie's eyes. It was an absolute, deep pain; and Michael knew it in a way. He knew about neuro implants, about what they gave the human partner, and he realized what Karr had done.
"Nick...?"
"I'm going in alone, Michael," Nick cut him off as he reached for the door opener.
Michael hesitated, then nodded. "We will be here."
Nick smiled briefly. "Thanks. Here goes," he then whispered and opened the door.
He was soaked within seconds, hair plastered to the head. He pulled his jacket up around his neck in a futile attempt to keep the rain away, but it was useless. It was a cold day. The sky was gray as slate and there was no sign that it would stop raining ever. In a way the weather reflected what he felt: cold, empty, lost and alone. He had never thought that it was possible, but there was no denying his feelings, his emotions boiling up inside him. Karr and Nick had been through a separation before, but it had never been initiated by one of them; it had been necessary at the time to let Nick heal, but it had not been forced by one of the participants and maintained artificially. And never had there been horror images of death and destruction echoing around his mind.
'What is happening to you, partner?' Nick thought desperately.
*
Kitt followed Nick's slightly unsteady steps silently, Michael keeping his eyes pinned on the soaked figure as MacKenzie entered the construction site. Kitt stopped just outside.
"He's here," the AI whispered.
"Can you feel him?"
"No, he keeps blocking me."
Michael sighed. "Kitt?" he asked after a while.
"Yes?"
"Could you... could you break the blockade if you have to?"
Kitt was silent for a second, then hesitantly said, "Possibly. Karr managed to break my shields when I went into flashbacks and he pulled me out. But I don't want to hurt him."
"But you could do the same? Even if it means confronting the nightmares?"
Kitt was silent again. "Yes. He is my brother, Michael. If he needs me, I'll be there for him."
Michael nodded, gently brushing his fingers over the sensor. If their guesses and fears were correct then Karr had broken under the pressure then it would be a hell of ride. "I know, Pal. Just be careful."
"He won't hurt me," Kitt said with utter conviction.
"Maybe not intentionally, but if he is flashing to the time you were hurt..." Michael stopped, too many dark memories rising inside him as well.
"I know," the AI answered softly. "I can handle it, Michael. We both can."
A smile tugged at his lips and he brushed over the sensor again.
* * *
Nick walked into the skeletal building. The rain was drumming down on him. He was shivering in the wind biting into his skin. His hands had turned numb a second ago. His mind was just as numb, mainly with a fear he was inexperienced with. Nick had never felt fear so acutely, so incredibly strong and ever-present. He had been afraid in the past, but he had always managed to subdue it for a mission or a case. Now there was no control any more. His eyes fell on a particularly dark spot in the gray environment.
The soft growl of an engine could be heard. Unlike Kitt, Karr didn't have a scanner band, but Nick didn't need to see one to know what was going on inside his partner. The frayed images he was receiving were enough. He swallowed.
"Karr....." Nick walked forward and the Stealth moved back deeper into the shadow. "Please, stop... let us talk." He felt his partner tremble through what he still received from the link, but he didn't know why. And it was a pain he couldn't bear much longer. "Please, tell me what's wrong," he begged hoarsely.
"Stay away! Just stay away!" Karr ordered, rolling backward through a wide and high opening that led into the open range of another skeletal building.
Nick still advanced, reaching constantly out through the link, but he encountered only the strong and unbreakable walls Karr had set up. The rain had lessened, but he didn't care any more. He was soaked and cold already.
"Why? Tell me why?"
"You know what happened! How can you ask me that question?" Karr hissed.
Kitt pulled up behind the Stealth as it entered the next building and Karr stopped, suddenly trapped with Nick in front of him and Kitt behind him.
"No, I don't know," Nick said with a shaky voice. His head was throbbing with his attempts to break through and he was receiving those blurry but still horrifying images again. "What happened?"
Karr growled dangerously. "Don't play with me! You want to scrap me, right? You want to shut me down again!" His voice was rising with panic. "I won't ever be shut down again!"
"Karr, what are you talking about?!" Nick exclaimed, eyes wide.
More images flashed past his inner eye and they all had one thing in common: death. Karr killing someone; a human being. There was blood everywhere, flooding each image, soaking it like the rain had soaked Nick. Gruesome images of twisted limbs and broken bones added to the horror, but there was no telling who the injured or dead person was.
"Get out of my way or I'll run you over!" the AI cried.
MacKenzie shook his head. "Not before I know what is going on here. No one wants to shut you down! I don't even know why you are acting this way! Tell me! We are partners! I thought we trusted each other!"
"I should never have trusted anyone!" the AI snarled. "Trust makes you vulnerable and trust can get you killed. I saw it in time and I won't trust anyone ever again!"
Nicholas winced. "Why?" he begged to know.
"You know why! Don't torture me like this! I should have killed you when I had the chance!" Karr roared in anger and surged forward.
"No!" Michael exclaimed as he witnessed the scene. The Stealth was shooting toward Nick, mud flying away from his tires, and Nick wasn't even moving. "Kitt! We have to..."
"He won't hurt him," Kitt whispered and it sounded almost like a prayer. "He can't.... he just can't...."
Michael tried not to think of the people who had been endangered by Karr's flight. He tried to forget the damage the Stealth had done. He remembered when Kitt had been ordered to kill his driver after someone had hacked into him, programming him his way. Kitt had stopped, had broken through the barriers keeping his self from taking over his body. Michael had had the ultimate trust in his partner back then and he knew Nicholas felt the same. He trusted Karr; had trusted him with his life so many times. But Karr wasn't Kitt; he was vastly different....
The Stealth braked hard and gravel and mud flew up around him, staining the black skin as he stopped in front of Nick, too close for Michael's comfort. Nick hadn't moved and he had his eyes closed now, hands curled into fists. He was shaking ever-so slightly.
* * *
Kitt brushed over the walls between him and Karr, whispering softly. It was something he hadn't stopped ever since he had encountered the blocked link.
_Karr? Open the link, please. I know you are there. Please...
He never got any response, but he had managed to chip away several layers already. It was a painstakingly slow work, but it was showing progress. He had to get through to the other AI, find out what was really going on. Nightmares or no nightmares, he had to help Karr.
_Please open up.
Tremors passed through the block and Kitt winced in sympathy. He pushed against the shielded link to his brother, feeling it crack. He pushed more and the cracks widened. Wisps of darkness trickled past him and Kitt tried not to shy away. He recognized the darkness; it was the darkness of nightmares he had experienced himself, nightmares Karr had shared with him every time had ventured forth into the injured CPU of his brother. Kitt had cleared his mind by sharing his nightmares with Karr, had unloaded a terrible burden, and Karr had buried his own fears and terror at what had occurred, had clamped up and had told no one.
_I'm here... trust me.... let me in....
Karr cried out in horror and recoiled. Kitt got the fleeting image of betrayal and he wondered what was going on. He pushed more, squeezing part of himself through the cracks. Strange images fluttered through the outer regions of Karr's CPU he was now in. He caught some fragments, but they made no sense. But they strengthened the belief that Karr was suffering a major breakdown because of a nightmare.
_Where are you? Kitt called. _Please let me help! I'm not here to hurt you!
Darkness mixed with weird light effects brushed past him and again there were fragments, this time clearer. They told of death and blood, of a human life that had been ended through violence. But who?
_Karr?
_Leave!
The voice thundered through the growing darkness in which chaos resided. Kitt followed it, ignoring the crazy echoes all around him. _What is wrong?
_You betrayed me! Karr screamed. _I only did it to help!
_Did what?
Kitt was confused. What was he talking about? Karr didn't answer.
* * *
Nick opened his eyes, looking at his partner. The engine was growling softly and this looked too much like just a stop and not a surrender. "Karr?" he asked hoarsely. "Why?"
"You want to know why?" Karr demanded. "Then know it!"
And the walls fell.
Nick had no time to brace himself. It was a raging, howling wave of uncontrolled emotions, a torrent of energy he had never felt before. His body couldn't classify it as anything and his implant was trying to buffer as much as possible. Still, it wasn't enough. His breathing grew ragged, his body shaken by tremors. He was thrown back a decade when Karr had first tried to take him over, but this was worse! Much worse! This time it was accompanied by horrifying memories, by images out of the deepest pits, and Nick had no defenses against it.
He tried to reach out for his partner, but it was a mistake. Nick cried out in pain, collapsing against the Stealth. A searing headache erased all thoughts, making way for whiteness. It was blinding, it was numbing, but it also brought agony with it. He doubled over, his head feeling like it would explode any second, his eyes blinded, his ears deaf except to the roar in his mind. His mouth opened for a scream, but no sound came out.
_Karr! he cried, though he didn't think the link produced words any more.
His neuro implant was coming alive with an agonizing fire and his mind was trying to compensate random energy signals he received. Part of what he was receiving was confusion, the rest fear and panic. It all mixed up in a torrent of energy heading his way. He gasped loudly as he received an almost physical blow and stumbled. Nick collapsed like a puppet whose strings had been cut. He lay like a lifeless heap, skin pale and sweaty.
Michael was out of Kitt in a flash and running toward where Nick was lying on the ground. "Nick!"
Karr's engine suddenly wailed loudly and he reversed, startling Michael. The Stealth shot back and rammed himself into steel container close by, denting, then tearing into it.
"NO!" he screamed. "NO! It can't be!"
Almost simultaneously Nick let out a loud groan, turning into a whimper of pain. Michael had no idea what was going on, but he knelt down beside his friend.
"Nick? Can you hear me?"
"A nightmare.... was a nightmare," Nick moaned, eyes still screwed shut, still trembling badly.
"What?"
//Michael....//
Michael looked up at Kitt who had inched closer. //What is it?//
//I... the block is dropping.... can't see all, but he .... Karr dreamed it....//
//What? He dreamed what?//
//That he killed Jennifer//
Michael gaped, shocked to the core. "What?!" he whispered. Kitt sent a flood of images his way, a more subdued version of what he had received from Karr and what Nick had been bombarded with, and Michael suddenly understood. "My..... god....."
Karr had vividly dreamed of killing Jennifer Knight and he had woken, believing it to be true. He had also dreamed of everyone else' s reaction..... and he had panicked because they had condemned him. Psychologically it was an interesting reaction, but Michael was not very much interested in psychology right now.
Nick moaned again, curling into a ball as if he was hurting, and he probably was. Karr was still wedged into the container and he wasn't moving.
"Nick?" Michael asked softly, extremely worried now.
"Have to... get ... to him," Nick managed, weakly trying to get up.
Knight helped him, hauling the slender man to his feet. Nick was trembling so badly that Michael thought he was going to fall again.
"Help me... over... to him," the ex-agent rasped.
Michael hesitated. Karr wasn't moving, but right now he radiated as much danger as the first time he had laid eyes on the prototype. He was like a wild, cornered animal that was currently stunned but ready to erupt into motion any time.
"Please!" Nick begged.
Michael had never seen such plain and undisguised need in the usually so cold and controlled eyes of his friend. Nick had dropped almost all shields; he was vulnerable and hurting, and he needed help.
//It's okay, Michael// Kitt whispered in his mind. //He's.... Karr's crying//
Michael was shocked for a moment, realizing for the first time that both partners were unable to get their shields back up. Karr was lost in the nightmares he thought were reality; nightmares from Kitt, twisted out of shape and locked in a vicious circle. He quickly helped his friend over to the black Stealth. Nick's hands ran over the mud-covered, wet surface, drawing shuddering breaths. He reached for the door and it clicked open. Michael assisted Nick as the totally wet man collapsed onto the leather seat, then he stepped back, not wanting to impose.
//Kitt?// he tried to reassure himself again.
//It will be okay//
Michael walked away, slowly, keeping an eye on Karr. Nothing moved. Kitt had drawn up behind him and automatically opened his driver's door. Michael sat down and kept on watching the other car.
"What happened to him, Pal?" he finally asked.
*
Nicholas was totally exhausted, unable to do more than just lie limply over the steering wheel. His hands rested on the sensor and he felt Karr's reaction in form a barely audible hum. He was shaking with exhaustion and he felt sick, his head throbbing painfully with each heartbeat. Thinking was a challenge and he wished he could just die.
"Karr?" he managed after a while. His voice was barely above a weak whisper.
There was no vocal reaction, but Nick felt a tremor, barely perceptible, and it echoed inside the link as well. He winced in pain and Karr withdrew immediately. He reached out automatically, stopping him.
"It's okay," Nick whispered, trembling fingers caressing the sensor. "Only a nightmare."
"So real," Karr moaned.
"Just a bad dream," Nick repeated. He closed his eyes, forehead against the steering wheel. "I'm here."
Karr shivered and Nick felt a hesitant probe through the neuro implant. He reached out as well, carefully touching the shaking, weak presence of his partner.
"I killed her," Karr said softly.
"Only in a nightmare," Nick answered, voice muffled. Through the implant he pulled him closer. Each move was painful.
"What if it were real? I ... dreams can come true...." Fear spread through the suffering AI. "I thought about it so often."
"But you never did it, Karr. There is a difference."
"But I could!"
Nick smiled slightly. Really?>
I hate her so much....>
So do I, partner. So do I. But I believe you would never do it. You tried to and you hurt her, but you didn't kill. You haven't killed a human since your reactivation, right?>
There is always a first time> Karr muttered darkly. I am still what Wilton Knight created>
Nick smiled again, feeling so tired. You are no longer KARR, partner. Not for the past decade you can't revert to it, believe me. I know you..... Trust me in this at least>
Karr shivered. I trust you, Nick>
Then why did you run?>
Karr moaned as if in pain. So real!>
Nick remembered only too vividly what Karr had shown him. Yes, it had been incredibly real. Why did you think I'd abandon you? I never would!>
It was... confusing. I.... I didn't know what to believe any more>
Nick sighed softly. And I should have known about the nightmare. I could have helped> He bit his lip. It was a known problem that even though, after the events surrounding Kitt's nightmarish experiences and his suicide attempt, Nick and Karr had grown a lot close, but they still kept apart. Unlike Kitt and Michael they weren't able to keep close when asleep. If they had allowed each other this closeness, Nick would have been alerted to Karr's nightmare.
Both partners stayed together, the silence only broken by the rain beating on the car.
"We should go home," Nick said after a while, voice blurred by exhaustion.
Karr shuddered. "No.... please...."
"It's okay. Kitt...."
"I can't face him!"
Nick tiredly lifted his head. "I don't want you to run again, Karr. You ran the first and the second time, but not again. Nobody blames you. The pressure you were under... and I didn't realize it... It had to happen."
Karr sighed. "Please not now? I need to... handle it."
Nick was about to contradict, then sighed again. "Okay," he whispered. He turned to look at where Kitt was parked, his red scanner band alight. "Contact Kitt." A soft beep announced that the line was standing. "Michael?"
"Yes?" Michael sounded worried.
"We are okay. Listen, Karr needs some time alone, and so do I, I guess. We'll meet you back at the warehouse later."
"Nick...."
"Please, Michael."
Michael sighed deeply. "All right. Just keep in touch."
Nick smiled. "Kitt will know how we are."
Karr closed the door and ignited the engine. Nick just leaned back, closing his eyes. He was too exhausted to even think he could drive. The black Stealth left the construction site and Kitt followed for a while, then they went their separate ways.
* * *
It was a beautiful spot and almost unknown to the general public, mainly because it was private land and the access was restricted. Not that it was easy to find the small, winding road to the large lodge anyway. The whole place was surrounded by thick woods and had been erected on a high cliff. The lookout was breath-takingly wild. Nick sat on the row of large boulders and stared out over the see. It was a nice day, warm and sunny, slightly windy, and very quiet. In the distance sports boats could be seen as tiny specks against the sapphire blue water and somewhere sea gulls cried. He knew the owner of this place and he had unlimited access to the lodge. He usually checked if the owner was home, but as it was he rarely could be found here. Karr was parked close by, his smooth black skin dully reflecting the sunlight. It was as if he was eating up more than half of the light and reflecting only a bit of the rest.
Nick reached out to touch Karr, something he had never really done like this. Before neither had been in need of an active touch, but since the incidents around Kitt, both partners had to change their positions. It was hard for Nick to show emotions, even to Karr. In the past emotions had trickled past the barriers, but neither had projected them on purpose. When Karr had helped Kitt he had been in need of someone else, of help, and Nick had readily given it to him. After everything had been over Nick had retreated a bit, feeling Karr do the same, but nothing had ever been like before again.
He sent a question.
Karr hesitated, then moved closer, seeking Nick's reassuring presence.
It's okay again. Just a nightmare. Not reality>
It was too real to disappear quickly> Karr answered softly.
Because the nightmare fulfilled your deepest wish?>
In a way..... And because I still have the wish to see her dead>
Nicholas closed her eyes and inhaled. "I know," he said out aloud. "So do I. But as long as we work for FLAG in one way or another, as long as any action I take would hurt Kitt or Michael, that long I have to restrain myself. Afterwards...." He trailed off.
Karr was silent as well, in a way echoing what Nick had just said. "I should have trusted you more," the AI said after a while.
Nicholas smiled. "Why? Because you ran away? Because you felt betrayed?"
"In a way..... I should have known that... that...."
"That we were beyond this?"
"Yes," was the soft answer. "You are my partner. We are partners for so long now.... I should have known!"
Nick walked over to the black Stealth and gently brushed his hand over the dark exterior. They had truly come a long way. A very long way.... Karr clicked the door open and Nick got in, feeling Karr's presence stronger than since the incident.
"Have you and Kitt talked?" he asked after a while.
"No. I... I didn't find the time," Karr said weakly.
Nick raised an eyebrow. "Want to try it again?"
The AI chose to be quiet. Nicholas shrugged and settled back comfortably in the seat, waiting. The wind was picking up outside and the sun was setting slowly. He knew they had to get back soon and he was thinking about returning to the warehouse tomorrow afternoon. As much as he had always been alone, as much as he had enjoyed these last three days, he had also grown used to company. Sharing his home with Michael, Bonnie and Kitt, sometimes Justin, had been a change he had readily accepted. It felt good; it felt right to have partners; it felt okay to share -- it felt normal to be human.
"I don't know how to explain it to Kitt," Karr said after a while.
"He knows it was a nightmare."
"His nightmare." Nick nodded. "I always told him I could handle it."
"And now you couldn't. It's not a weakness, partner. Kitt understands and so do I. It had to happen because the pressure was too much."
Karr closed up, thinking. He was very uncomfortable with the subject matter. Confessing a weakness, even when it was already known, was very hard for him.
"He will understand," Nick added softly, touching the sensor briefly. Karr leaned into the touch and Nick smiled. "He is your brother."
The AI kept his silence and it was okay with Nicholas. He was used to it.
* * *
Karr was embarrassed. Kitt knew it and he didn't know how to assure the other AI that it was okay, that what happened was not embarrassing but a very normal reaction. He had kept the link open from his side all the time, while Karr closed himself off. He never managed it completely and now and then his shields wavered and partially dropped. He seemed to be peeking around his own barriers, testing whether or not it was safe to come out or not. Kitt always reached out for him, letting him know it was totally okay to feel like he did. After a while Kitt managed to sneak a tendril into the CPU of his brother and wrapped it around the confused presence.
_Come home, he whispered.
Karr looked at him, hesitating. I can't.....
_You can. You taught me how to confront my fears, now do the same. What happened was a simple nightmare.
_Not so simple, Kitt. I lost all my trust in my pilot and in you. I should have known better, but everything was so real! I believed it.
_As I believed the horror visions I had in my nightmares. Nightmares are very real and frightening, hence the name. What happened was a natural reaction to the pressure you were under.
_Maybe...
_Karr, you are not invincible, Kitt reminded him gently. _We can all just take so much and you took more than you thought you had, right? You were there for me throughout the nightmares.... now let me help you. Please.
Karr reached for him, hesitantly, carefully, and Kitt smiled. He hugged the other AI, sending warm emotions and trust. He was aware of Nick close by, asleep and resting. He gently wrapped part of him around the human presence as well.
_Please, Kitt repeated.
_Tomorrow, Karr replied after a while, sounding much calmer now. _Nick and I... we need some more time.
_You can't force what hasn't been for years, Karr. You and Nick made a lot of progress since we met. It takes time.
Karr stuttered something, then hid this part of himself behind a shield. Kitt smiled in amusement. Karr was always trying to hide the more gentle part of him. Kitt had seen the anger, the tightly controlled temper, the still residing coldness that was Karr, but he had also seen the unconditional trust the AI had into Nicholas MacKenzie, the dependence, the love and friendship. Karr just didn't express it as much on the outside when others were around. Kitt had seen how deep the link ran and how interwoven those two individuals were. He didn't want to push and he didn't want to threaten his brother, but he knew that if Karr came back it would all be much easier on him.
_I'm always here for you, Kitt added softly.
_I know, Karr answered after a while. _Thank you.
Kitt hugged him again, then retreated slightly, but he didn't loosen his hold on Karr. Both AIs went to rest, Karr approaching Nick's sleeping presence carefully but not touching. Kitt watched and smiled softly.
The next afternoon both Nick and Karr were on their way back. Michael and Kitt would be home waiting, and they were ready to talk. Karr needed to talk to his brother, share what he, and before him Kitt, had experienced. Both had suffered immensely from Jennifer Knight, one directly, one directly but just as badly. It would need more time, a lot more time, and an AI never forgot. Nick knew that, as did Michael, and as the respective partners of the two artificial life forms they had their share to do.
But it would get better.
One day.