Regrets
It's the day before the end of their second year of junior high and the Hitachin twins stare down at Kaoru's desk in disgust.
"Another love letter? When will these girls learn?" Hikaru says.
"I know, right?" Kaoru adds as he picks up the envelope and opens it.
'Kaoru,' it reads, 'there is something I have to tell you before graduation. Please meet me in the back courtyard after school.' And it is signed 'Karin Sagara.'
Hikaru wrinkles his nose. "Do you even know who that is?" he asks his brother. Kaoru thinks for a second.
"You know I barely notice anyone in this class, but I think she sits behind me." Hikaru's mouth spreads into a wicked grin.
"Wanna pull the switch on her? It could be our last chance this year."
"Yeah, why not?" Kaoru agrees. Letter in hand, the brothers make their way to the courtyard. When they arrive, they get into their positions, Kaoru out in the open pretending to be Hikaru, and Hikaru hiding behind a pillar.
After a few minutes a girl approaches Kaoru with a determined step and a pale blush across her cheeks. He was right, she was the one who sat behind him. She was pretty, nothing special, but pretty. Short, mousy brown hair, light green eyes, and a smattering of freckles across her nose.
Oh boy, another sucker. Kaoru thinks to himself.
"Hi Kaoru," she says timidly, "I asked you out here because my family is moving to America tomorrow and I didn't want to have any regrets before leaving Japan." She takes a deep breath. "I like you Kaoru. For two years now since my seat has been behind yours." Kaoru only looks at her, almost not wanting to play the game. Almost.
"I hate to tell you this but I'm Hikaru. Kaoru and I switch desks all the time, you must have gotten us confused." Karin's face turns cloudy, her eyes grow shiny with potential tears. He continues the charade. After all, he and Hikaru must know. Is she like the rest?
"Hey, I've noticed you in class and I like you. Would you take me over Kaoru?" A single tear runs down her cheek.
"I know you're Kaoru." She says sadly. Shocked, Hikaru steps out from behind the pillar and watches her. "I can tell you two apart. I've been able to for a long time now. Why would I ever just forget about you and go for Hikaru? You're the one I like Kaoru, not him. That's horrible! You're not interchangeable! You're individual people with different feelings, wants, and needs." She locks her watery eyes with Kaoru's.
"Kaoru, you can be so kind and sweet. That's what I like about you the most." More tears start to fall. He is stunned, having no idea how to handle this situation. Hikaru is dumbfounded as well and for the first time in his life he feels a pang of jealousy of his twin.
"I wanted you to know how I felt before I left," Karin continues. "I'm so ashamed of myself. I had heard from the other girls you two might try something like this. I had hoped you wouldn't do it to me because I know which one of you is which. Even though I saw right through it, its still a mean thing to do Kaoru and it hurts." She rubs at her face with the heel of her hand and turns to leave. Kaoru reaches out to stop her, but she speeds up and hurries out of their lives. He just stands there, reaching for her, unable to move. Hikaru comes up beside him and takes his hand.
"What did we do Hikaru?" Kaoru asks quietly, tears building in his eyes. "What did we do?"