This was almost 5000 and not done. So I thought I'd split it up into short chapters and make it a little short chaptered thing. And then... I fucked up saving the files... and lost over 2000 words. So... I'm just gonna cry. Because I didn't write any of this down. I wrote it 100% on the computer. And I just... I can't believe it. So excuse me while I cry for hours and hours and I will work on it more later. I just wanna post what I got now.

Anyways... Ian/Mickey from Shameless, sorta stuck in the Dead Space game. This idea woke me up this morning at 5 am and I just had to get up and write it. (And then delete half of it, apparently.) So I go cry now.

Warnings for: Light gay stuffs, language, major character death, bloody stuffs. (And for me crying.)

Dead and Lifeless: Catalyst

Mickey Milkovich. Security Officer #286. Day 12 since the incident. 23 more have fallen sick despite our best efforts to keep the infected quarantined. We've sent out a distress call to Earth. But it will be 3 days until the message gets there and 3 days for a response. Until then, I guess we just wait.

Mickey Milkovich. Security Officer #286. Day 25 since the incident. Over half of the security team has been infected. We've had to expand the medical decks, taking up half of the storage decks. I really don't understand what's going on with the infected personnel. My sister, Mandy... Amanda Milkovich, Hydroponics Team, was taken down there yesterday. I was with her when it happened. She just said she was feeling a little off. Then she was just... puking blood everywhere. I tried to see her this morning. But they won't let anyone down there and it's fuckin' pissing me off! FUCK! Ain't supposed to cuss in these logs. We're still waiting on a response from Earth. Haven't heard anything from them. We've sent another distress signal, stronger this time. So... still waiting.

Mickey Milkovich. Security Officer #286. Day 29 since the incident. I've been detained in the cells. Fuckin' locked up! I was just trying ta see Mandy! Fuck this shit... hey! HEY! YOU CAN'T KEEP ME LOCKED UP IN HERE! THIS IS BULLSHIT! I JUST WANTED TO TALK TA MY SISTER!

Mickey Milkovich. Security Officer #286. Day 33 since the incident. They released me from lockup. Said it was just to see if I'd been infected myself when I snuck into the vents. Fuck that! I was fuckin' with Mandy. She fuckin' puked on me! If I wasn't immune, I woulda been down there with her! But they say I'm immune. Guess I'm lucky then. Cuz that means I ain't fired. There's like only 20 something on the security team left. Rest are locked up in medical. So fuck it. I can say whatever the fuck I want in these goddamn motherfuckin' logs! No one fuckin' watches them anyways. Oh yeah, I've been promoted to the Senior Security Team, bitches!

Mickey Milkovich. Senior Security Officer #5. Day 45 since the incident. Something weird is happening downstairs. The medical decks are still sealed off. We've lost communications with them. But the noises... it's fuckin' creepy as hell. We can hear shit though the vents. Still nothing from Earth. I think they've seen out another signal. But nothing. Fuckin' shit.

Mickey Milkovich. Senior Security Officer #5. Day 51 since the incident. ... I... I don't... I don't know where... to start... me and Lip... Phillip Gallagher, Senior Tech... tech uh... fuck! I forget what he said. He calls it the Geek Squad. Also says to call him Lip? So yeah, Lip, Senior Geek Squad Dude, he managed to hack back into the lower decks' security cameras... and... it was just... there was so much... I... Fuck! Never figured myself for a squeamish pussy bitch but after seeing that shit, I fuckin' puked and Lip starts freaking out. But I'm immune so it ain't the infection. Just so much blood and shit. I don't even know what it is. Dead bodies... and pieces... and they're... eating each other... or... FUCK! I don't know! ... and I just... can't... Mandy! She's still down there! Somewhere! And I told Lip I'm fuckin' breaking the doors down! I will find a way in!

... Mandy's dead... I can't... she's just... Lip hacked into more videos... and it happened... while I was locked in those fuckin' cells... those motherfuckers fuckin' recorded it! Then they fuckin'... they... they shot her... I can't...

Mickey Milkovich. Senior Security Officer #5. Day 63 since the incident. ... Yeah, yeah, Lip. Get off my ass, I'm fuckin' doing it! Lip says he studied the videos of Mandy and a dozen other people. Once the infection gets to a certain state... it like... fuckin' mutates or some weird ass shit. They started eating each other. I don't fuckin' know. He showed me a couple videos but I can't watch it. I can't... Mandy... ... ... I found the Head of the Security Team, Tony Markovich, dead in his office this morning. Gunshot. Self inflected, far as I could tell. Dude was in over his head anyways, I think. He was only a few levels above me when this all started. He got promoted cuz he was the highest one left. Guess now I'm the highest.

Mickey Milkovich. Head Security Officer #1. Day 72 since the incident. Far as we can tell, it's just me and Lip left. We've walled ourselves off in the uh... kitchen? No, not the kitchen. Hydroponics deck. The food storage level? Fuck, it's a giant, walk-in freezer. Lip hacked into it, turned off the freezer part, I guess. He says it's safe, I guess? Cuz it's walled off and it fuckin' locks from the inside and the vents aren't open to the rest of the ship. Cuz that's how they're getting around the fuckin' ship and killing everyone. The fuckin' vents! They hardly even look like people anymore. Just... monsters, I guess.

Mickey Milkovich. Head Security Officer #1. Day 78 since the incident. ... ... ... Lip's infected. We thought he was immune like me. Cuz... well... he's still fuckin' alive! I can't... I don't... he's still going, though. He's still trying ta figure this shit out. He says it was some alien bacteria, brought aboard the ship when the excavating team brought on samples to study. He's trying ta teach me shit. How ta hack the computers like he did and how to keep the generators working and how to keep growing food and shit in Hydroponics and keep the oxygen cycling and how to keep on living. I ain't smart like him. I can't understand this shit! My head's gonna fuckin' explode!

Mickey Milkovich. Head Security Officer #1. Day 89 since the incident. I put a bullet through Lip's brain today. He said that's the way to kill the infected before they start really mutating. Once they mutate, it's harder to get a killshot, cuz they keep on moving and mutating. Ya gotta like, dismember them. Shoot off a leg to slow them down. Real messy shit. And they keep coming. So ya gotta just keep shooting or hacking or shit. ... ... I don't know how Lip lasted so long. Prolly cuz he was hyper focused on tryin' ta figure this shit out. He saved all his smart shit on a micro drive and put it on a fuckin' chain. He said I gotta keep it safe, cuz when I get rescued, I can hand it over and someone with brains can finish what he started. Fuck that. I know I ain't getting off this ship. But I'm still gonna wear his fuckin' necklace drive cuz I promised him I would.

Mickey Milkovich. Just Some Dumbass Still Alive. Day 95 since the incident. It's been 6 days since I've seen another living person. Pretty fuckin' sure they're all dead. I can't remember the exact number. But I swear, there was like over 10,000 people on this ship. It's been like 3 fuckin' months! I don't fuckin' understand!

Just Some Dumbass Still Alive. Day 99 since the incident. Why the fuck am I still doing this? Prolly cuz it's the only time I actually get to talk to someone. And it's to no one. Just fuckin' talking to myself. But it feels like I'm not talking to myself... Still nothing. Still alone. Still fucked in every sense of the word. Still living in the fuckin' freezer. I only go out when it's really quiet and the cameras are all clear. Still fuckin' can't believe I can keep this shit running by myself.

... ... ... I... I don't know... I think... I'm going crazy... I thought I saw... but... no... I watched her die...

... ... ... ...

... ... ... I don't know how long it's been... I've lost count... days... weeks... months... years?

... Mandy?

... ... ...

Mandy... are you there?

... ... ... ... ... ...

Save me...

Author's Notes: So yeah. I'm gonna go cry.