Author's note: Hi! This isn't my first fanfic, I just made a new account. I hope you guys like the story. I have a lot planned for it. Also there will be scenes of self harm and there might be some other mature content later on, but I'm keeping it T rated for now until I decide. Please review. :))
Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans.
I subconsciously drummed my slender fingers on the desk. I laid my cheek on my free hand. I look at the clock. I still have 15 minutes left. It was as if the clock was mocking me. Like it was purposely slowing time. I watch the seconds hand gradually move. Taunting me.
Tick tock
Tick tock
Tick Tock
My eyelids were slowly opening and closing over and over again. It was so hard to keep myself awake right now. Although I did not wish to be here, I wasn't yearning to be home either. I felt like I had no place to go. No place where I could feel at ease. I feel as though I am always on the edge. One of these days…I won't be able to take it much longer. I will break down. And no one will care.
I felt a soft nudge at my arm. I look up at one of my dear friends, Vic. He was like my big, protective and funny brother. It's actually quite surprising that he's my friend. He's the quarterback for our school football team. Yes, he was a jock. A popular one. I did not particularly care for the jocks. Most of them are foul and rude. But Vic seems to be the only one with his head on his shoulders. He's a good guy. He is one of the few people I could actually count. I knew that if I was in trouble, he would be there to save me. He always helped me in the past. But I haven't told him much about myself for the past couple of months. At least the bad stuff. I did not want him to know. He would worry. He would be upset. Disappointed.
He gives me a warm smile, but in his eyes I could see that he was a little concerned.
"You okay?" He whispers.
I give him a fake smile. "I am fine."
I know that he is not convinced. But he does not push me. He simply nods and continues to listen to our teacher, Mr. Mod go over the review for our test tomorrow. I frown to myself. I wish I did not have to lie to Vic. He deserved better than that. He has always been kind and truthful with me. But I just…did not want to be a burden with my problems. It is best I say that I am okay. Even though, I know I am truly not okay.
I felt myself zoning out the entire review. I could not focus. At all. I just had this very uneasy feeling. I did not feel comfortable. I never did.
"Miss Anders am I boring you?" Mr. Mod calls out sarcastically.
I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment. Everyone was looking at me. I hated when people stared at me. I loathed it.
"Uh…no sir." I reply quietly.
"Just remember, this is your grade. Not mine." He says while pointing at me.
X'hal, I wanted to shut him up so badly. That stupid, grumpy, old man. He knows I am not a bad student. Despite all of my problems, my school work is the only thing I am good at.
"I understand." I say.
The 10 minutes left felt like 10 days. I thought the class would never end. I just wanted to leave so badly. It's bad enough I was humiliated.
Vic and I are the last ones still in the class after the bell rings, aside from Mr. Mod. I gather my notebook and papers and slid it into my dark brown, leather, crossbody bag. I put the strap on my shoulder and begin to leave the room with Vic.
"Miss Anders, a word please." Mr. Mod says while shuffling papers on his desk.
Is he seriously going to yell at me now?
I look at Vic with a slight frown, but he returns me a reassuring smile and leaves the room. I walk over to Mr. Mod's desk. He looks at me with genuine…concern?
"Kori, what's going on?" He asks softly, his thick British accent coming through.
I'm taken aback by his question. I was sure that he was going to yell at me. But he thinks that I am having trouble. Well I am, but this was none of his business. He is merely my teacher.
"Nothing." I say, trying to sound as calm and honest as possible.
"Kori, you're doing excellent with your grades. But every time I see you, you look so…troubled." I could hear the sadness in his voice when he spoke the last word to me.
He was right. I am troubled. But I did not wish to talk to him about this. I felt uncomfortable. I do not want to open up to my teacher about this.
"Mr. Mod, I am fine." I say.
He sighs heavily. "Okay, get to your class."
I nod and almost ran out. I couldn't wait to get out of that room. Upon leaving, I nearly run into another good friend of mine. Rachel.
"Oh my apologies Rachel!" I say with my hand on her shoulder.
She gives me a small smile. "Relax Kori. I'm fine."
Rachel relates to me in many, many ways. She understands my pain and troubles. She has also gone through a lot in her life. She lost her mother at a young age and her father was very abusive. A very evil man. When I moved to Jump City, I just turned 15. That's when I meet Rachel. Since we are total opposites, it took a while for our friendship to develop. But I learned how compassionate, artistic and wonderful Rachel is. She never opened up to anyone. Not a single person. As our friendship developed, she told me everything about her life. I mean everything. I was heartbroken when she told me about some of the things she went through. I knew she needed help. She needed to be saved. After much persuasion, Rachel and I talked to the guidance counselor. We told her about Rachel being abused and she was immediately put in a foster home and her father was arrested. Of course that was an extremely difficult experience for her. But I was with her every step of the way. She lives with a lovely middle aged married couple now. Ben and Renee. They love her like she is their own daughter. Ever since she took that big step in her life, our friendship has never been closer. She's like my little sister. Rachel has taken out her pain and frustration on other things, instead of herself. She paints, draws and writes poetry. They're all very dark and depressing, but magically beautiful. Rachel has been a lot happier now and that's all I ever wanted. Since the day she opened up to me, I wanted her to be happy. She tells how much she can never repay for what I have done for her. But her friendship is enough. Like I said, she understands my pain since she can empathize. But just like Vic, I haven't opened up much to her the past couple months. I assure I am much happier now, but I know that's a lie.
"Oh good. I must head to class." I tell her and leave before she can answer.
My chemistry class is actually interesting me. The chemicals, the molecules, the science, all of it fascinates me. It is especially better since I have Gar. The little brother I never had. I take my seat next to him and he flashes me his goofy smile. He's definitely the jokester out of Rachel, Vic and I. Although, when he and Vic are together it's even better. Gar wasn't exactly popular; he was actually rejected a lot. A lot of people just think he's odd and annoying. But on the contrary, he's a very a sweet, funny and enjoyable person. He gets judged so harshly. And if Gar is a loser, then I must be one too.
He carefully rakes his fingers through his spiked, dark brown hair and slightly pats it down. I giggle at him. He's always making sure his hair is perfect.
"What is up, Gar?" I ask politely.
"Nothin' but the celling baby." He says with a sly smile, with his fang poking out.
I roll my eyes at him. "You always say that silly."
"It's the truth ain't it?" He says with the smile still plastered on his face. Come to think of it, he is always smiling. That's one of the reasons why I love him so much. If you're having a bad day, he will do everything he can to make you laugh, at least once.
The rest of the school day is like a blur. I zoned out a lot again. Sometimes, counting down the minutes til I could get out. Once that final bell rang, I was relieved. I walked home, feeling a slight breeze. Winter is approaching. I do love the cold and snow, but in Jump City the winter lasts longer than it should. It's usually a miserable time since everyone else despises the cold so much.
I finally reach home. I notice my sister's car isn't in the driveway, she must be out. Like always. I toss my bag on my bedroom floor and slip off my shoes. I flip the switch for my fan and turn my stereo up a little. The soft ballads echo through my room. I finally crash onto my bed. Sweet relief. At least for now. My eyes slowly shut. I felt so peaceful. But I knew that couldn't last long. As soon as I wake up, the pain will wash over me again.
Author's note: I know it's not that exciting right now, but I assure you it gets better. The first couple chapters will mostly just tell you what's going on in Kori's life and talk about the people in it. But it does get a lot better. Pleaaase review. :)