The Brady Kids Go To Fantasy Island....
Mr. Roark takes Greg into his fantasy first. Because he is the oldest and that is the way it is done. Greg wanted to become a famous Rock star named "Johnnie Bravo", and here is where we begin.
Mr. Roark: Are you sure this is the fantasy that you wish to come true?
Greg: Oh yes, sir! Johnny Bravo is the most hip far-out happenin' guy I can dream of becoming.
Mr. Roark: Okay, you are starting at the Grammies, where you will be accepting your award. Good Luck!
*SWOOSH*
Carly Simon: And the winner is.... Johnny Bravo!
(Applaud, as Greg takes the stage)
Greg: I just want to thank all you groovy people out there. This is really groovy in a hip happenin' way out kind of way. Far out! I mean really, man! Dig it.
(Dead Silence)
Greg: Make Love, not war! And I want to dedicate my far out trophy to all you happenin' groovy far out fans! Beanstalks never grew before, everyone!
(Audience becomes restless and begins booing)
Greg: Till I met YOU! The fans! Way far out! Groovy!
(NEXT DAY: Greg is in the recording studio with his agent. It doesn't look good.)
Agent: It doesn't look good, Greg. It looks as though since 24 hours ago, you have made a nose dive. The ratings on your record sales have dropped to zero. I'm afraid we are going to have to cancel your contract.
Greg: I knew it. Johnny Bravo isn't getting bravo'ed. I guess I will have to pack my guitar away and become an accountant or something.
Agent: Don't shoot so high Greg. Keep your feet on the ground. Get real, you're done.
(Next Day: Greg is sitting on a street corner with his guitar and he is singing his heart out as Mr. Roark drops a dime into his hat.)
Mr. Roark: Not doing so well, Greg?
Greg: No.
Mr. Roark: You know the secret to being cool is to relax and just be yourself. You will be a lot happier once you learn that.
Greg: Gee, I never thought it like that.
*SWOOSH* (Back to reality.)
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Mr. Roark now takes Marsha on a trip to her fantasy. She wanted to be the most popular girl in school.
Mr. Roark: Marsha, are you sure that this is what you want?
Marsha: Oh yes! I would love everyone to want to be me! I want popularity no matter what the cost.
Mr. Roark: You got it. You will start off your day leaving the school restroom because you just got done brushing your hair. Good Luck!
*SWOOSH*
(Marsha is flipping her hair walking through the hallway. And strutting past a group of boys)
Marsha: Hi, boys!
(They seem to ignore her until she passes by.)
Boy 1: Hey, good looking! Where you off to in such a hurry?
Boy 2: I'm in love with you Marsha Brady.
(Whistling and hoots follow Marsha everywhere she turns. She is feeling very popular. Some of the girls are giving her nasty looks. She notices.)
Marsha: (To herself) Hmm, some girls are jealous no matter how popular you get.
(She spots Doug, the big man on campus and Charlie.)
Marsha: HI, Charlie and Doug. What's up?
Charlie: Hi, Marsha.
Doug: Hi, Marsha! Hey, I was looking for you. I wanted to ask you if you want to go to
the dance with me?
Marsha: Well, yes, of course, Douglas. Thank you for the invitation.
Charlie: Marsha, can I speak with you for a minute?
Marsha: Oh, Charlie, you'll get your turn to speak. Just be patient.
Charlie: But, Marsha!
Marsha: Oh honestly, Charlie. (sigh)
Doug: So, I will pick you up at seven then?
Marsha: Sounds good to me.
(Doug starts to walk away and without Marsha's knowledge, he looks at her behind.)
Charlie: Marsha, can I speak now?
Marsha: Yes, Charlie. You may.
Charlie: You're skirt is tucked in your... well, how do I say this..., your panty hose. You can see your rear-end.
Marsha: What?? Oh my Goodness! Oh, Charlie, what will I ever do?? That's why guys have been looking at me. (begins crying) What is the point of living? I might as well be DEAD!
(Just then Mr. Roark dressed as a teacher pulls Marsha aside and out of ear shot from classmates.)
Mr. Roark: Popularity isn't always what it seems, Marsha. You may end up getting it in the end.
Marsha: I never thought of it like that.
*SWOOSH* Back in reality.
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Mr. Roark now takes Peter on his fantasy. Ever since he heard someone say he had no personality, he wanted to have a chance at Star Search to be a stand up comedian, because we all know he can't sing.
Mr. Roark: Now, Peter, are you sure this is what you want?
Peter: (Squeaky voice.) Oh, yes, Mr. Roark. I have to find my place in the world and find out who I am. I want to try being a comedian.
Mr. Roark: Ok, you will start off back stage reading up on your new joke book. Then you will perform live for the very first time. Good Luck!
Peter: (reading out of joke book) What's black and white and red all over?
Stagehand: (Pokes his head in) You're on in three, Peter, are you ready?
Peter: I think so.
Host: And now, for all those funny jokes the up and coming Peter Brady!
Peter: (Voice squeaks) Hi, Everybody. Okay, here's a good one. What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Man in audience: TIME TO GET A NEW FENCE!
(Audience boos)
Peter: Okay, how 'bout this one? What's black and white and red all over?
Woman in audience: A NEWSPAPER!
(Audience is getting restless and booing harder)
Peter: I - I - I have another one here. Um - What do you get when you cross and elephant with a rhino?
The Entire Audience: ELL-IF-I-NO!
Peter: Can I just go look something up for a second?
(Audience booing.)
Man: Get off the stage!
Man 2: Loser!
Host: Well, well, well! Looks like someone needs a little originality! (Whispers to
Peter...) Get off the stage. That's your cue to leave!
Peter gets off stage. Behind stage stands Mr. Roark.
Mr. Roark: You know, Peter, you will find that not all of life's answers are found in a book, but in real life experiences.
Peter: I never thought of it like that.
*SWOOSH* Back in reality.
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Now it was Jan's turn to take a trip into her fantasy. Her wish was that George Glass be real for her. That he be somebody that she could speak with and see. Not a made-up boyfriend. And this is how that fantasy unfolded...
Mr. Roark: Now, Jan, are you positive this is the wish you wish to come true?
Jan: Oh, yes, Mr. Roark, then Marsha and all the others will see how popular I am. And
they will know that I am not positively goofy.
Mr. Roark: Okay, you will start off in the backyard gardening and he will come to greet
you. Good Luck!
*SWOOSH*
Jan is planting plastic flowers in the garden. Suddenly a boy walks up to her.
George: Hi, Jan!
Jan: Hi, George! You know my name!
George: What you doin'?
Jan: I am planting flowers. But you have to come inside and meet the family. (She grabs his hand and she can feel his hand in hers.) Wow, you really are here! Groovy!
Jan pulls George into the house where she is calling for Marsha.
Jan: Marsha! Oh, Marsha! I have someone I want you to meet!
(Marsha comes in the room)
Marsha: Yeah?
Jan: Marsha, this is George! George Glass! He is my groovy boyfriend.
Marsha: Huh?
Jan: I said he's my groovy boyfriend. Say hi to George Glass.
Marsha: Jan, you are going to have to do a lot better than that if you want everyone to
believe in this supposed George Glass.
Jan: What?
Marsha: There is nobody here!
At this point Jan realizes that Marsha can't see George. She has to prove her validity, so she calls her mom and dad.
Carol: Yes, Jan?
Mike: What's this meeting about?
Jan: Mom, Dad, meet George... George Glass.
Carol: Okay, ... where is he?
Jan: He's standing right next to me.
George: They can't see me, Jan.
Carol: Are you feeling alright Jan? Maybe I should call the doctor.
Mike: What I think we have here is a case of the jealousy bug. She's obviously hallucinating.
Jan: NO!! NO!! NO!!
Alice: (Comes in) What's all the hollering about?
Marsha: Jan has gone crazy.
Alice: Oh alright, well meatloaf will be done in a half an hour.
Jan storms off outside in a huff.
Jan: (To herself and George) This sort of thing wouldn't happen to Marsha! Why does
Marsha get all the boys?!? Why does everyone always see Marsha's friends, but not mine???!!!!?? MARSHA! MARSHA! MARSHA!
Mr. Roark beams in.
Mr. Roark: You know, Jan, Envy and Jealousy will only lead to self destruction. Accept your role in life and nobody will ever notice you.
Jan: I never thought of it like that!
*SWOOSH*
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Now, it was Bobby's turn. He wanted a role in the Brady Family's happy home. He wanted all the responsibilities his brothers and sisters had. It was unfair, he thought. And he was just a step. While the others got everything it seemed.
Mr. Roark: Are you sure that this is what you want Bobby?
Bobby: Yes, sir. I can handle the same responsibilities they do. I want to be noticed as well.
Mr. Roark: You got it. You will be starting in your room as you will be trying to write a song that will swoon the girls over. After all, that's one of the responsibilities.
Bobby: Groovy!
Mr. Roark: (Shakes his head) Good Luck!
Bobby: Clowns never laughed before. This is easy. I don't know what Greg complains about.
(CHIME)
Bobby: I am going to perform the best magic show in the world. I just need to find my
assistant.
(CHIME)
Bobby: (In Girly voice) Need to brush my hair. (Brushes strokes) 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-
(CHIME)
Bobby: AHH! What is happening to me??
(CHIME)
Bobby: (In girly voice) Where is Kitty Carryall? I lost her, (starts crying)
(CHIME)
Bobby: MAKE IT STOP!!
(CHIME)
Bobby: (In girly voice) Marsha!! MARSHA! MARSHA!!!
(CHIME)
Bobby: MR. ROARK! HELP ME!
(CHIME)
Bobby: Beanstalks never grew... La la la!
(CHIME)
Mr. Roark comes in at this point.
Mr. Roark: Bobby, responsibilities are something you acquire over time. If you were just handed all the responsibilities, then you would not ever learn real responsibility.
Bobby: I never thought of it like that.
Mr. Roark: Glad it made since to YOU.
*SWOOSH*
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Now it was Cindy's turn. She wanted her Kitty Carryall to be alive! She loved that doll and wanted to be her real mommy.
Mr. Roark: Now, Cindy, are YOU positive this is what you want?
Cindy: Oh, yeth thir! Kitty Carryall will be mine forever!
Mr. Roark: Okay, you will begin as she is formed a life. In your bedroom with Kitty.
Good Luck!
*SWOOSH*
Cindy: (Brushing Kitty's hair) Oh, Kitty, you're juth tho thpecial!
Kitty: (opens her eyes.) Hi, Cindy!
Cindy: Kitty Carryall, your alive! Oh, my biggeth dreamth juth came true!
Kitty: That's what you think, you little brat!
Cindy: Kitty, whath wrong?
Kitty: "Whath wrong???" I am so sick of you spitting on me with your cursed lisp!!! I have a message for you, tiny tot! I'm out for the kill!!
Cindy: What?
Kitty: Thorry! Let me thay it tho you underthand. I'm going to kill you!
Cindy: Mommy!!
Kitty: You're mommy can't help you now, Cindy! (Kitty wraps her hands around
Cindy's throat.) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Tho Thorry, Thindy!
Cindy: Mr. Roark!! HELP ME!!! Kitty'th gone crathy!
Mr. Roark steps in and pulls Kitty off and she turns into a regular doll again.
Mr. Roark: A real friend cannot be bought in a box, Cindy.
Cindy: I never thought of it like that.
Mr. Roark: I'm not done, Cindy. You cannot make up friends but make them by being a friend in return. Also, you might want to work on your little speech problem. (Wipes his face with a tissue.)
Cindy: I never thought of it like that either!
*SWOOSH*
The End.