I just sat against a wall reading and watching the world go by when suddenly.
*Dumpf*
A sack that was quite light had fallen on me from the third floor so it still hurt from that height and crushed me. All I can think is Ouch...
"Ouch..."
"Yeah to right" did the sack just talk.
"A-a little help"? The sack asked so I pulled out my Swiss army knife and ripped it open to reveal a girl. "Thanks".
"Is climbing in a sack and jumping out a third floor window what you usually do for fun"?
"Oh no, it was Linda and her gang they al-" she froze and went bright red when she realised she had one foot either side of my head against the wall and she was sat on my stomach so her miniskirt was flipped back so I can see her panties. "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" she moved her feet from the wall to my face that flew back into the wall as she held her skirt down to where it should be.
"Igh ghna clsh mm eez zoo plz mnph yogh feesh" I wheezed out but what I tried to say was 'I'm gonna close my eyes so please move your feet'.
"HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT THE LOVE BIRDS. A BLACKBIRD AND A RAVEN SITTING IN A TREE" Linda shouted from the third floor window that made everyone point and stare.
"What...oh yeah" she removed her feet from my face then put them on the floor. Now she's just straddling me, nothing weird, so now we just sit in silence. After a little while I picked her up off my lap and stood, she was still very light. Wearing no shoes, a red miniskirt, blue shirt and had hair like L but tamer and somehow darker that matched her black irises, she's cute like a puppy but with the physique of a toddler so not hot. I stood her down but her hand was caught in my long hair.
"I'll sort it out".
"Thanks" her voice was small like her. I pulled out my knife again and chopped off a bit of my hair so she can struggle with it.
"Thanks for catching me even though I just kinda fell on you so actually thanks for letting me crush you".
"Anytime" I really don't care just go away.
"Could I get you a drink from the cafeteria"? She's probably trying to draw me out into the open so they can mock me for falling for her being cute.
"Sure" I put a hand full of loose change in her hand "Hot chocolate, lots of sugar. I'll wait here I sat on a nearby bench.
"Oh, okay" she scampered off and just as I was about to begin reading again.
"Hello nice moves" A jumped up from behind me.
"What do you mean"?
"I mean you and Blackbird getting it on in the bushes".
"We weren't getting it on she fell out a window".
"Well nice moves".
"What moves"?
"Your flirti- oh crap here she comes" he jumped back down behind the bench.
"Here you go, and here is your change" she handed me hot chocolate with so much sugar it was more like a paste.
"Thanks, wait this is the same amount of money as I gave you" I flicked through my spare change.
"Yeah I know" she replied while sitting next to me.
"Well here I don't like owing people" I gave her the money for my lumpy paste.
"Oh, okay" my god this paste is delicious, so much better than usual. "So what's your real fake name? I know people call you Raven".
"It's Back up. You"?
"I'm Obsidian Blackbird McKnight but just pick part of it".
"Like Boosh Obsidian Blackbird McKnight or are you just crazy and it's a big coincidence"?
"No it's Mighty Boosh incorporated, and you like the Boosh"?
"Of course, it's amazing I have all the live shows and series along with the 'mighty book of Boosh' but as it says in the beginning of the 'mighty book of Boosh' it gave me arm strait so my friend gave me the 'pocket book of Boosh', no one can like Boosh more than me" oh no I let my guard down, damn you Boosh. Correction no one can damn the Mighty Boosh it's to awesome.
"That is amazing but there is one fault in that because I like the Mighty Boosh more than anyone".
"Oh really well do you have any DVD's or Book's of the Boosh"?
"Well I have no friends to buy me fancy books but I'll tell you what I do have, I have 'Tiny acts of rebellion' by Bob Fossil".
"No way, I want that book and I feel sorry that you have no DVD's or other books".
"Cool" I'm...I'm having fun with another human being. That's possible? God, I must be ill. "I'm sorry but I think I'm coming down with...with...with something" I got up "It was very nice talking with you I hope it happens again sometime and thanks for the hot chocolate" I set off to the nurses office. When she went away with my blood in one pot and pee in another to test them and see what's wrong with me suddenly.
"Hello Raven my old buddy" a voice came from behind me and made me jump.
"For god's sake stop doing that A".
"I thought you were a Buddhist".
"So"?
"Don't use Christian stuff".
"Fine, for Shakyamuni sake stop doing that".
"That's more like it, anyway how'd it go with lovebird on the bench over there".
"Were you watching when I had my blood taken"?
"Yeah, but what happened with Boosh babe"?
"And what about when I peed in the cup"?
"Did you see me leave? Now tell me what happened".
"I feel violated and hope you rot in hell" I got up and left but A followed me.
"What about your results"?
"I get them delivered to my dorm tomorrow the only reason I waited was because of our absurd conversation".