Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in the story nor do I own Monk... I suppose I own the unborn baby though. If you read the first two
Unselfish and Unnatural and
One Monk's Cold
You'll know it's AU
"Happy birthday Captain," Monk told the captain
"Thanks"
Monk saw the look on the captain's face and sighed. He knew why Stottlemyer wasn't smiling. It was the first birthday that he was celebrating without Karen.
"I'm sorry," Monk told him
"Why are you sorry? You did nothing to be sorry for.
Later when he got home, Trudy could tell something was bothering him.
"Hey honey," she said kissing him, "you okay?"
"Do you know, do you have any idea how much I love you? Do you know, do you have any idea how much you mean to me? You are my world. You are the sun the moon and the sky… you and the baby… and in 4 months she'll be here… do you have any idea how much you mean to me? Do you know, can you possibly imagine how much I love you"
She hugged him tightly as if she would never let go.
"I love you more then you can even imagine," she told him, "now what's bothering you"
He paused for a minute before answering her.
"It was the captain's birthday today," Monk explained
"Oh… the first one without Karen, huh"
"Yes," he replied, "and I feel-"
"You feel like there's no way to express how grateful you are to him for what he did"
"Exactly"
"And you feel a little guilty in a way?"
"How did you know that?"
"I can see it," she explained, "Every time you get the look you have that look in your eyes… like you feel guilty"
"True," he told her, "I would never change it. You're my world. I couldn't live without you"
"You know what helps sometimes," she said, "is to right down your feelings and your thoughts"
"I-I'm not as good at that as you are"
She put a hand on his arm
"It's not a talent," she told him, "you don't have to be good at it. Just write down your thoughts. And," she said, "since I know that you need everything to be a certain way why don't you use the computer that I use. That way it will help your sense of order"
As if by some wonder the words came right to him.
I know at times we argue
At times we disagree
But no words can 'ere express
What a great friend you are to me
You're always there to lift me up
When I had fallen down
You talk to me and make me see
And you are patient even when I act like a clown
No words can say thank you
For the friend you've been to me
There's no way I can show you
That you have not already seen
My friend there is no time
My gratitude will go away
You are a lot stronger then I am
You show it every day
And every day you show me
The beauty in things I cannot know
Every day your friendship
Never fails to grow
For you see that most people
Feel there's a time when friendship ends
And after that you never have to
Make an effort again
Now it is true that
What you did for me is great
But every single day
You fill up the friendship plate
You didn't have to do this
You never have to at all
My friend it's thanks to you
I can stand up straight and tall
Because of you I smile
Instead of frown
Because of you my life is right side up
It isn't up side down
Even when I'm stupid
Which I can be quite a bit
You never make me feel bad
You never have a fit
You simply point it out to me
In such a simply way
A slight little motion
A word or even a gaze
There are no words to let you know
How much you mean to me
There are no words to tell you
How much you make me see
So much you could have chosen
So much you could have done
But you acted as a friend
And made sure that I won
No it's not a competition
As Trudy always points out to me when I get on my competitive drive
But if friendship is an Olympic event
You would get the golden prize
You're smart and you are funny
And you know just what to do
In times of trouble we all know
Just who we can turn to
I just want you to know you're like a brother to me
I love you till the end
You are forever my best friend
You are forever my best friend
Then he printed it out. She read it
"Adrian," she told him, "that is absolutely beautiful"
"Do you think he'll like it"
"Do I- he's going to love it"