Caraphernelia - (n); a broken-heart disease whenever someone leaves you, but leaves all their things behind.
Summary: He left me with caraphernelia.
They say it's like falling asleep; dying. But what if all your life, your only dreams were nightmares?
...
A dim curtain of black and grey was cast over the stormy sky; the ashen moonlight was barely visible at the edge of the horizon.
She looked up, expecting to see rain drops fall from the heavy clouds, but she only stared into the vast, endless grey. A sigh escaped from in between her gritted teeth as she struggled to hold her tears back. Her eyes stung with expectation and despair as she looked down at the fresh dirt beneath her bare feet.
What the hell was she thinking, roaming around the darkness like this? It was the dead of night and no sound could be heard except for her chocked whimpers that echoed through the thin air. But there was no one around to hear. Her feet carried her away from the comfort of her home, and now, the only solitude she could find was the disarray of her own mind.
She hated moments like these – when everything was too still and everything was too loud. Her thoughts sounded loudly in her head and she was helpless to escape them.
Without meaning to, she'd crossed the roads and fields that separated her house from this long abandoned area. Where was she going? Her hair flung around her face in the wind and for a moment she thought that she was sleepwalking, but her mind was too awake for that too be true. Then again, lately it seemed that she was sleepwalking through life - her face was expressionless, hidden beneath a mask she didn't want to wear anymore. Her feelings were bottled up deep within - put aside behind all those other things she was not yet ready to face. And everything around her was spiraling out of control at a rapid pace. Her life was crumbling away around her – and her mind along with it – and she only stood by and watched it happen.
Her feet were now covered in dirt and soil that got under her nails. Her eyes darted around the space quickly, taking in the wasteland as if it were the last thing she would ever see. The remains of wasted life were painfully obvious now and she almost gave in from beneath her weight and fell to the ground. But she was too close to break down now. She tilted her head back a little, unwilling to look ahead.
She found it. She was here. She might as well get it over with. Her feet were suddenly too weak to carry her any longer as she lowered herself to the ground. The filth quickly stained her white dress but she didn't worry about brushing it off. Now that she was alone, she could finally confront it all.
A single tear tickled her cheek as it slipped across her face. She closed her eyes tightly, like she wanted to hide her weakness, but there was no one to see. She smiled despite herself, forcing her lips to part even as she went to pieces inside.
"I wish you could see me now," she whispered into the wind. Her voice broke down but she didn't care. "You always patronized me about crying, remember? You said I had no right to cry for you," she let her head fall and her hair had hidden her face away from view. She bit back a whimper as her shoulders trembled again. "You idiot."
She reached out her hand, stroking the dirt and stone lovingly. Her sight was blurred with tears, but she could discern the writing on the gravestone all too clearly. She read the words aloud slowly, letting them sink in for the thousandth time.
It was just like him to die in someone else's regard. It was just like him to leave her when he promised to come back. It was just like him…
Edward Elric
1899 – 1918
She smiled again. "That idiot."
Hope you can tell me what you think about this one! ^_^