It was the night of Blair Waldorf's party, and though publicly it was not pegged as such, the party was the one she had thrown in the honor of reinstating her reunion with Nate Archibald. Serena knew she should be happy for her, heck she WAS happy for her; and yet 30 minutes of the festivities had been enough to chase the beautiful blond away.
It was only half past eleven where Serena stood. She had left the party in the hopes of going home, of crawling into her bed with a delicious scoop of ice cream—but comfort eating was not Serena's style. Drowning away her sorrows in heavy liquor was more authentically van der Woodsen. But Serena had changed, she didn't drink…she would go home and force ice cream on herself. She would remain the good reformed girl Dan Humphrey was dating. She would go home.
She had not.
At a quarter to twelve Serena still stood at his door. She had nowhere else to go. She had no one to turn to, and by the current festivities of the Waldorf's she knew he would empathize.
Still standing, waiting for some sort of sign perhaps, Serena began tracing the numbers on his door. She had tried in vain to talk herself away, direct herself perhaps to Dan, but suddenly she was tired. She was tired of being Dan's golden girl, of getting no room to screw up. She was tired of fearing living her life the societal way, and she was tired of being judged and prodded incessantly. And nevertheless Dan Humphrey was the last person in whom she could confide her current misery, unless perhaps it was her starter for a break up.
Taking in a deep breath Serena's tall figure was suddenly given life. She stepped forth and in one swift motion, free of all hesitation, she knocked.
"Hi Chuck."
He watched her for a moment in amused silence, pursing his lips in that familiar way. He finally spoke.
"Please, call me brother."
Serena would have glared, attempted to stare him down, but his gaze stopped her.
His eyes were blank. They were free of true malice. He was hurting too much.
He was waiting and Serena wanted to say something, but the words were crowded in the back of her throat. Yet she didn't need to say anything, her eyes spoke for her.
Blair and Nate thrive on their union; they thrive on being the royal couple of the Upper East Side. And to remain so they would steamroll over anyone, even you and I.
Though not a word had been spoken, Chuck stood in silent agreement. Serena took this to be a welcome and pushed past him, entering his suit. She headed straight for the bar. Heavy liquor would just have to do.
They drank in silence. No words passed except a murmur for more liquor. But they conversed fully. Each understood the other's pain, knew the story behind the pale sickly skin, the tale of those wide glass eyes.
"Does Humphrey Dumpty even suspect?" Chuck finally spoke.
"No. I've given him no reason to; I've given no one a reason to…"
Chuck watched for a moment before he spoke again.
"You can stop it van der Woodsen. All it takes is a word, perhaps even a gesture…Nate wouldn't resist."
"I resist. Blair is my best friend; it'll never be worth it. Thought you understood Bass."
He groaned softly before chocking the sound with the liquid in his glass.
"Nathaniel is a better catch than Blair. "
Serena rolled her eyes at this. She would not encourage Chuck's tongue lashing of her friend, but she couldn't help but enjoy it…if just a bit.
"So how is the blessed couple?"
"Glowing," Serena muttered sarcastically.
"Only you can stop this, a hint that's all—"
"Leave it alone Bass."
"—You do it and you save us all…be a little martyr. I know you like that."
"I said leave it Bass."
He said no more. They continued to drink…and sometime later the dreadful silence was replaced by Chuck and Serena, rowdy as can be. Suddenly the two were lamenting their days as players; days when Nate and Blair's relationship cost them no more than an eye roll.
Chuck made known his shock at her return, the shock that his partner in whorism had turned angelic. That party girl van der Woodsen was all washed n clean, ready to settle and be good.
Serena smirked, thinking of their days in the fabulous four, thinking of the times she and Chuck would drink up and party double, just to compensate for what Nate and Blair would miss. She remembered all the times spent at some bullshit charity event or other where she would end up on Chuck's lap drunk. How she would grope him and he her as they mocked and coaxed the wonder couple at the round table they sat.
They had been disgusting and lecherous. But they had had a lot of fun. The climax to her fun had come the day of the Sheppard Wedding…she wondered if the rumple with Blair had been the climax to his.
"Gawd Bass. Did all the debutants lose their virginity to you?"
He gave her a knowing smirk. She sighed and drowned her glass. She had not meant to say that. They had ceased to mention that day a long time ago.
"Last I remember sis, you've deflowered nearly as much as I have."
She was silent again, but only for a short while. She watched him in dark humor and said the words her subconscious had begged her to bury.
"You and I, Bass, deflowered the royal couple. Our greatest victory, no?"
"Our greatest victory," Chuck murmured and they shared a dark bitter laugh.
"I assume you have gotten better."
"I have."
Serena poured herself another glass and smirked at him.
"You hardly lasted ten minutes."
Chuck smirked back.
"Yes well we were in the eighth grade. That summer if I remember correctly."
"Yeah. I was sick of…"
She didn't finish her sentence. She didn't want to. Chuck rolled his eyes at her.
"Oral sex? Yeah me too…it was all the rage back then."
That wasn't it, but she said nothing. Her mind went to her first attempt, it had been with an older boy; Leighton Bask. He played Lacrosse for St. Jude at the time.
"He couldn't get it up," Serena suddenly giggled, "I was two years younger and he was the nervous wreck."
That's why she had come to Chuck. He was the only boy in the UES who didn't worship her, the only boy who would take charge like she needed, that first time. It had been his first too.
"Yeah well, lucky you had me sis."
Serena rolled her eyes and put her empty glass aside. She had satisfied her thirst for liquor.
"Yeah Bass….you rocked my world"
Chuck's smirk was undeterred. He looked cocky as ever.
"Not my fault van der Woodsen. You were so nervous. You wiggled too much."
"Wiggling is good."
"It messes with my thrusting."
He almost purred the last word and Serena found herself heating up unconsciously.
"Not if you're an expert thruster."
Chuck drew closer to her and whispered his next words.
"I am now."
"And I suppose you want to show me?"
Serena now moved back a little, but not enough.
"Not in your dreams Bass."
"But you're not in my dreams sis. You might as well end up in my bed. That was the plan last time no?"
Serena glared at him before contemplating taking another drink. She decided not to and unconsciously began playing with the lowest button on her top. Buzzed or not, the thought of being fucked into oblivion was not so unpleasant at the moment. But she had changed. She wasn't the girl who lost her virginity at 14, not anymore.
"I don't think so."
"Then why are you here sis? I'm sure Humphrey would love to screw away your pain, even brew you some tea afterwards….why are you here Serena?"
She watched him for a second and in that moment it was clear to her why she had. And in that same second she leaned forth and kissed him.
She wanted to go back, because going forth had not worked. There was so long when she could pretend to be good, pretend to forget Nate…she just wanted a visit. And Chuck Bass was the ride. He would shuttle her to a better time, and she could return, refreshed and ready to be the new Serena, Dan's Serena and all would be good and well.
He had been motionless at the first meeting of their lips. He had let her brush hers against his for a moment and then just as suddenly he parted his mouth and let her tongue in, kissing her back viciously.
Serena kept on enjoying him, everything about him. She could almost taste Blair's jealousy as Chucks hands slip up her thighs, disappearing underneath her skirt. She had come in defiance to Nate and Blair, the couple that trampled over their best friends, she had come because she and Chuck deserved better…because they would be better.
They had sex the first time just there; it was on the rug sitting between their couch and the mini-bar. They did it two times more; she rode him on the coach, and he her on his bed. Finally they succumb to sweet slumber and woke up to find one leg entangled.
Serena knew she should panic and storm out of there, but she didn't want to. Instead she stretched out luxuriously and ordered Chuck to call up room service. She would then turn to him, not so much bothered with covering her large breasts, and tease that he was acceptable.
"How does Humphrey measure up…"
Serena smiled, that wasn't the question he wanted to ask.
"Not well. I rode Nate, he was virgin remember. And same goes for Dan."
Chuck grinned at her before rubbing his dark hair.
"Back to the perfect world, right sis?"
"Yeah."
Serena then looked back at Chuck before rolling her warm body on top of his, her bare breasts skimming his chest. She drew her lips close and kissed him again, though in a lazy lucrative manner.
"You should hook up with Vanessa. She is a nice little girl; her world will keep you occupied…"
"hmm-mmm"
"Another virgin for you to take."
She began grinding her hips against his now.
"Uh uhhhh."
"We can double date, and you and I sneak off to the bathroom…no more Blair and Nate."
They made love again that morning, and within a week Serena was setting up Vanessa for Chuck. There was some prejudice to smooth over, but Serena's word was that of god to many and she could change minds.
All Serena wanted was to see him more and see less of Nate. They would take those bathroom trips (sometimes became an elevator or a backroom trip instead) and help each other move forth, fuck each other refreshed in their quests to forget the wonder couple, to keep up the charade.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.