Never Breathe a Word
By L. M. Boulevardes
Prologue –
Liar, Liar
Peter Pettigrew doesn't tell his first lie until he's eleven years old when decides not to tell Severus Snape that James Potter is the one who tripped him. James grins at him and says "Good man, Pete," once Severus has stomped off in a huff, Lily Evans hurrying after him. She shoots a glare at James and Peter think it's a good think that they don't learn wordless spells for a while because otherwise he has a feeling James would not being grinning so triumphantly but rather be suspended upside down or something equally unpleasant. Peter doesn't say anything in response, just shrugs and tries to decide where he might sit for breakfast. He's still having trouble with that, even two weeks into the term. "Hey, come eat with me," James says after a moment, perhaps noticing Peter's distress. That's all it takes for James to win Peter's affection. No one has ever invited him to be their friend like that, like he might be cool. After that Peter decides lies aren't so awful after all, whatever his mother might have told him.
James Potter tells his first lie when he's five years old and his mother asks him if he ate the cookies she made for her party. He stubbornly shakes his head, only to be undermined by the chocolate-chip cookie crumbs dotting his mouth. After that, James learns to be more careful about planning these kinds of things and making sure one lie can cover another. You really can't be too careful when it comes to lying, not if you want to stay one step ahead.
Remus Lupin tells his first lie when he's three and Anna Green asks him why his parents are emptying his cubbie. "You're going to need your paper for the art project!" she protests, wringing her tiny hands. "Aren't you doing school anymore?" Looking back, Remus will compare the look of horror on her face to certain expressions of Hermione Granger's. He glances at his parents, and somehow he just knows that because I'm a werewolf isn't the right answer to give. So he tells Anna he's moving, and she hugs him and cries and he goes home and throws up everywhere.
Sirius Black can't remember the first time he told a lie, but if pressed he would say it was probably shortly after his second birthday when his brother Regulus was born. It's the first one he can remember, anyway. Uncle Alphard asks him if he's excited about the baby, and Sirius shrugs and picks at his ice cream, unable to eat for some reason he doesn't understand. He feels kind of like he's going to throw up, but he doesn't know how that could happen when he hasn't eaten anything yet today. It's really too bad he can't enjoy this, he knows his parents would never let him do anything like this if they weren't at the hospital.
"Why aren't you excited for the baby, Siri?" Alphard asks, his eyebrows jumping together in concern them falling back down again. He bites his lip, then clenches his jaw at Walburga's voice echoes in his head reminding him that only half-breeds chew on themselves like animals. "Do you not want a brother?" Alphard presses. Sirius squirms.
"I don't mind having a brother," he says carefully, watching his uncle's green eyes flicker. A moment of silence passes as Alphard stirs his tea, even though he hasn't added anything more to it.
"Hmm. Is there something that might be bad for the baby in your home?" Alphard glances around the restaurant, checking to see if anyone is listening. It seems clear, but for safety he mutters a spell and flicks his wand under the table, trying to tease out any amplifying spells. You have to tread lightly if you're going to ask questions like this where Blacks are involved.
"Well." Sirius is biting his lip again. He feels the skin give and a trickle of blood leaks down his chin and into his mouth, tasting like salt and copper. He refuse to cry, but he sniffs and Alphard comes over to pull him into his lap, gently blotting the spot. Sirius' lips move like he has something to say, but suddenly they close tightly and he begins to tremble. Alphard looks up to see Orion approaching them, his black eyes betraying no emotion.
"Your mother is resting peacefully, and the baby is healthy," he states, sounding more like a reporter than a father. Sirius blinks and Alphard nods, trying to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach. "Sirius, come meet your brother," Orion orders, holding out a hand. Sirius hesitates and Alphard picks him up, smiling tightly.
"Oh, let me carry him. It won't be long now before he's too big for it," he says, grinning at his brother. Orion ignore him and glances at Sirius.
"Are you so weak that you need to be carried?" he questions, crossing his arms and glaring at his son. Sirius swallows.
"I would rather walk, uncle," he whispers. Alphard gently puts him down and Orion slaps his thigh, the same gesture that he uses when he wants the dogs to heel. Sirius follows him on wobbly legs, sniffing every few seconds and telling himself that it doesn't matter that Alphard's arms are warm and that he smells like cinnamon while his mother is bony and smells like wine. He wants to walk on his own. He does.