Disclaimer: Don't own anything. Do I look like a rich English woman to you? First of all, I'm not rich. Second of all, I'm not English. But, I am a woman.
Authors Note: This is my third in a series of angsty Hermione one-shots. The other two were "4st 7lb" and "A Few Small Bruises". No idea why I keep writing these, but, ah well. Hope you enjoy!
P.S. Inspired by "Strawberry Gashes" by Jack Off Jill.
Warning: Self-Harm. Suicide.
S
I turn her over.
No No No No No!
This is NOT happening.
Please! Not her! Not her! Anybody but her! PLEASE!
How could I be so stupid? I should have stopped her! I knew how she was! I was the only one who saw through her!
This is my fault!
All my fault...
T
"You alright there mudblood?" She drops her books to the floor.
I hear all the Slytherins laughing as they walk past to their next lesson. I smirk.
She bends down to pick them up.
"No Potter or Weasley here to help you now, is there?" She hides her face from me.
Her sleeve slips up her arm.
R
We're alone in the corridor now.
"What's that?" She realizes what I'm looking at and pushes her sleeve back down.
"Nothing!" She says. I grab her wrist and push her sleeve up again.
I see pale white skin with strawberry gashes all over. I look up into her eyes.
"Granger?"
"It's nothing, alright! Why won't you leave me alone? You've done enough damage already!" She has tears in her eyes now. She snatches her wrist from me and sprints down the corridor and out of sight. I shout after her.
"Hermione!"
A
My eyes can't comprehend what I've just seen. Why would someone want to do that to themselves. Why would someone like to cause themselves pain. What reason would you need to-...It hits me.
I made her do this.
I made her do this to herself.
I made the poison that runs it's course through her.
I made the strawberry gashes.
W
I look back.
How did everyone just sit back and watch me fault her?
How didn't anyone notice that she didn't like being made fun of all the time?
How didn't anyone notice that she never put her hand up to ask questions anymore out of fear of everyone mocking her?
How didn't anyone notice what they were doing to her?
B
Called her over
Asked her if she was improving.
She said "Feels fine. It's wonderful here."
I never knew what she meant by that.
Until now.
E
Wish someone would hex me. I deserve it.
I told her that she was worthless.
I told her that she was pathetic.
I told her that I didn't care and that I never had.
I told her that she was a...
I'm so stupid!
R
I dreamt of a devil that knew her last night.
The pale white skin and strawberry gashes.
R
She said.
"I'm going to die"
She said.
"Goodbye."
She said.
"This is the end."
She said
"Kill me faster."
I wish I had listened
Y
I lay quiet.
Waiting for her voice to say.
"Some things you lose and some things you just give away"
I can't believe that I just gave her away.
G
I scold myself.
I failed her!
If only I had held on tighter...
A
Held on tighter to the pale white skin that twisted and withered away from me.
S
A single candle is lit in the room I found. I stare at it.
Her body lies in the middle.
I haven't told anyone yet. If I did, then it'll all be real. It'll mean that she's actually de...She's not. It's just a sick joke. She'll wake up in a minute and won't believe that I actually fell for it. She'll wake up. I know she will. She wouldn't do this to me. She wouldn't leave me in this world all alone.
She'll wake up. She'll wake up. She'll wake up. She'll wake up.
She won't wake up.
H
Knocking on the door. I hear voices.
"Draco, darling. Are you alright?"
Mother.
"Malfoy! We know you're in there!"
Potter.
"Is Hermione there with you? Malfoy"
Weasley.
Silence.
"Fine! Don't talk to us! We're coming in anyway! Alohomora!"
The door crashes open. I hear footsteps. Gasps. They must have seen her.
I'm still staring at the candle. I stand up.
"Blow it out and save all her ashes for me."
E
They'll find my body someday.
With strawberry gashes all over.
S
Authors Note: Reviews? Please?